A lot of people are going to want to talk about the debates. Not The League.

The League is going to want to talk about something ultimately more important, and that is: The new Burger King commercial where the dude "wakes up with The King."

This is The League's new favorite commerical. Why? This commerical:

1) Includes the return of the old 1970's Burger King mascot, The Burger King.
2) Has character in a plastic head
3) has a pleasingly disquieting way of selling breakfast

I always wonder why companies abandon mascots, but I like it even better when they bring them back. For example, I love the burger-headed guy McDonald's uses in its retro-style ads when they pretend to be a classic burger joint. So the return of the Burger King is timely and welcome.

When I think of the Burger King, I think of one of the final places I saw him before BK ditched him for... I guess Herb the Nerd.

In 1984, the Steans clan moved to Austin and frequented the BK at 183 and Anderson Mill Drive. Inside, they had free ballons for the kids, and regular air filled ballons not being good enough, they had a helium tank. It helps to know that the helium was dispensed from a mold of the Burger King's head. I believe it may have come from the mouth, but that can't be right.

Anyway, Jason and I had placed our order and were waiting for Dad to pay, and, hey... free helium, right? So Jason was just sucking back helium to make funny voices. And, so, with a brain full of helium and deprived of oxygen, dude just kind of flopped over on the floor. Which was funnier than I'm making it sound here. But all I can remember is looking for help and seeing that menacing frozen smile of The King as the curious looked over to see what that "thud" was.

Jason was okay, btw... he just went from being an honors student to being one of those kids in the back of class who doesn't talk much, likes to light things on fire and always smells like syrup.

On an unrelated note, I finally watched last night's episode of "Lost." The League is still somewhat skeptical even after two episodes, but we may have found a new show. Funny how it airs at exactly the same time as Smallville. Last year, this would have been a problem. God bless my DVR.

And, just to tease me all the more, the kid on the show was flipping through a DC comic a few years old starring the once profiled Green Lantern, Alan Scott and Flash 1, Jay Garrick. Kind of cool.

So Smallville has gotten off to a fairly good start this season. And since it's Clark's senior year in high school, someone at the WB corporate office has decided to up the nakedness level by a factor of five. It's nakedness, ahoy! on the USS Smallville.

I'm neither for nor against the nakedness, but it's an abrupt change and far more interesting than my senior year of high school.

I have to say I've been thoroughly impressed by the girl playing Lois, Erica Durance. I don't know if it's the scripting or the actor or the combination of both, but they seem to have finally breathed enough life into one of Clark's potential romantic interests for me to believe Clark would actually dig on her. From the publicity stills, I admit, I rolled my eyes and thought... "ah, another WB ingenue." But this dame is okay.

Unfortunately, Clark's previous romantic interest, Lana, has now been to Europe. And if high school and college taught me one thing: beware the folks who've just been touristing in Europe, for they will now spend endless hours (1) insisting they are now more cultured and refined and no longer recognize Mequite, TX as their place of origin (2) telling you stories that are exciting only to them (3) not seeing the irony that much of what they tell you about would seem silly if the exact same situation had happened in the States, insisting it's better because That's How They Do It in Europe (4) affecting some idiotic accent that's not really from the US, but it's not identifiably European, unless there's a secret land of Pretentiovia, and that's the secret accent of all who dwell there.

I'm being a little harsh, because The League never had funds to make it to Europe, and The League is, admittedly, a little bitter about that one. But The League has decided when he finally DOES go overseas, he's going to Tokyo. He thinks he's seen most of Europe on TV now and he's ready for some Japanese fun. And, Leaguers, I wanna eat a squid.

In addition to Lana's post-vacation sure-to-be-silly-and-who-cares-? subplots, she's now ditched pink for a more continental black. Actress Kristen Kreuk has decided that the new Paris-infused-Lana is going to be cranky. Whiney-Lana was bad enough, but now we've got three years of whiney under our belt, so I'm not sure dumping cranky on top of that is going to win me over as a viewer. Especially if we're to understand being a tourist in Paris justifies a turn to crankiness.

Anyhoo... after Smallville, I watched Nova from beginning to end. I know. Nova! I hardly ever watch Nova unless it's Sunday afternoon and I'm avoiding homework.

This episode was about the likelihood of finding intelligent life out there somewhere in space. And, unlike the video we watched when I was in 8th grade science with the the evil Ms. Napper, this video was actually fairly encouraging about our chances of finding intelligent life. You know... eventually.

The show's producers didn't suggest we're going to be palling around with awesome aliens tomorrow, but in the past 15 years, it appears that astronomers and astrobiologists have come to some new conclusions based upon mounting evidence that there could be many more planets out there like our own Earth than they once believed.

Using our own planet's history, they did plug a lot of reality into the situation, and did point out we ARE the only iPod slinging species on the planet, so I can see why the presence of life on a planet might not necessarily suggest that every planet teaming with life is going to sprout a SETI dish. Nonetheless, this program was better than that video in 8th grade which basically said: we are alone on our dinky little rock. We're a cosmic hiccup. Quit looking, you morons.

Luckily, Virgin Galactic will be there to take us to our new friends when we find them. (thanks to RHPT.com for the link)

Hey! Guess who just tracked me down? High school and college chum Madi "Mad Dog" Hinojosa.

God bless the magic of ego-driven/ self-delusional weblogging for making me dangerously easy to locate.

Last I saw of Madi, she was an English Major at UT. Well, I also thought I saw her once at a movie a few years later, but the movie was just about to start, and I didn't want to yell across the crowd. I also always think I see people I know, but then I'm wrong. It's invariably a complete stranger.

Madi is most famous for:

-reading a lot more than me (she reads those books WITHOUT pictures of people in tights)
-actually joining Amnesty International, and not just because she thought she might meet Bono
-Having a peculiar love of the original art from the AA Milne Pooh books
-Locating booze for me in college more than once
-Being the single most patient human being alive
-Is somehow related to Tish Hinojosa
-Having a perfectly formed plan to overtake North America which she just hasn't enacted yet

It's good to hear from Madi once again! Let's hope she replies to MY reply, and I get to catch up with my pal.

Smallville may tell the story of a young Clark Kent as he comes to terms with his destiny as Superman, but it also tells the story of a young Lex Luthor on his way to becoming a criminal mastermind.

For a quick look at WHY Lex turned evil, let's review from the pages of Superboy comics...



Yup. For years, Lex's early hairloss was the entire motivation for his criminal activity. Prior to that, he'd been Superboy's pal. I'm not really sure a lot of thought went into that one.

All you Wallace & Grommit fans will be happy to hear that Shaun the Sheep is getting his own show!

Yay Shaun! -- Mrs. League

Today will see the release of Smile, the lost Brian Wilson/ Beach Boys project.

It's taken 37 years, but the album is finally available.

How about them Cowboys?

Damn you Monday Night Football. You have swiped my Monday night away from me once again.

Mrs. League here. If you have a cat, you might be interested in:

The Infinite Cat Project

The most bizarre thing I've seen in quite a long time, and I have *got* to get Jeff the Cat involved. I wonder what they would do with a Mel picture looking at all of the kitties?

Okay.

So I'm driving into work, and the car in front of me is going sort of slow on this stretch of road which is marked as a 40MPH zone, but which is usually driven at 50-55 (it's a 4 lane road with a median).

I look up at the driver and I notice that he's:

smoking a cigarette
enjoying a cup of coffee
reading the paper

Wow. I'm not really sure if I was (a) terrified of this sort of willfull stupidity, or (b) if I really admired the guy for his moxie. Clearly, he did not have the same kind of quality instruction I once received at The Austin Driving School (who once had the odd slogan: We taught a burro to drive, people are easy). Instructor Joe would never let us smoke and drink and read while we were at the wheel, no matter how much we begged.

The guy was going the speed limit, but not with traffic... and unfortunately everyone behind me was speeding up and going around me, so I couldn't even pass the guy. I considered leaning on the horn, but I was afraid of what that would stir up if he spilled his coffee or dropped his cigarette.

How is it I can barely drive with my hands at 2 and 10 o'clock and totally focused and some guys can drive while partaking of a ritual which usually involves a couch? I am so jealous.

The Texas Longhorns were once again victorious over the lowly Rice Owls in Saturday's match-up. Well done, Horns!

I think the Sun Devils may have won their game, but I got distracted and never finished watching the game.

On The Brother's recommendation, we saw Shaun of the Dead yesterday afternoon. Quality, quality film and I highly recommend it. The movie has "cult film" written all over it, and should have been released two weeks into October to take advantage of folks looking for a good Halloween scare.

The movie rides similar lines to Evil Dead 2, managing to be both funny and to have some genuinely frightening moments.

I kept thinking Jim D. should see this flick all throughout. It keeps with the standard zombie formula, but has it's own little bits to add. Worth matinee.

Anyway, I logged on to do some work and homework, so I should probably get to it.

Real life Lemmiwinks?

Actually, this is kind of creepy if you've been reading Grant Morrison's We3 from DC/ Vertigo comics. You kind of have to have read the issue.

Soak in the horror of....

'The Last Starfighter', the Musical

--Mrs. League

The League's personal hero, Russ Meyer, dead at the age of 82.

God rest your soul, Russ. And thanks. You gave us all a lot... to, uh, think about.

Reason number 1209 that Oprah is annoying.

Those free cars? Could cost the unwitting recipients $7000 in taxes.

Of course $7K is what Oprah spends on slippers in a year, so I wonder if the figure even means anything to her.

Bottom line is, I'm betting most of these peopel don't end up keeping the car unless they were planning on getting a new car soon, and something very similar.

Happy Elephant Appreciation Day!
--Mrs. League

Apparently The Pixies played here last night and I missed them. I am an idiot.

Luckily, they are swinging back through Phoenix on OCT. 22.

I have already purchased my tickets. For Pixies tour dates (no, they are not visiting Beaumont. I can't believe it either...) click here.

Unfortunate update

Jamie tells me this is the same day her folks are coming to town.

Despite being a fan on and off since I was 15, I have never seen The Pixies. They may never tour again. I have just spent an inordinate amount on tickets.

I have to think Judy would WANT for me to go to the show.

Jim D. comments upon the release of the Star Wars trilogy on DVD.

And he says what we're all thinking far better than we would have said it.

If we can sue the Federal Government to get them to release papers, can we sue Uncle George to get our movie back?

DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!!

Jason (The League's brother) returned from college with all kinds of new-fangled ideas, but one of my favorite was the best game in the world.

DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION

This game spawned the movie game listed below, and the rules are simple.

Have at least two players (although three or more is preferable so there is always a horrified witness).

Now, one person is the question-person, and the other is an answer-person.

You will take tunrs in each role, but the question person's job is to dream up an absolutely horrific situation. Now dream up another. Now present these two options to the answer-person. The Answer-person must select between one of the two horrible fates dreamed up for them, and they cannot say "I don't know." They MUST answer. And, yes... DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!!

The question I like to kick a new game off with is this (and it's a borrowed one, so fogive me for not being original):

If you had the choice between:

four magical tree frogs stuck to your face for the rest of your life, constantly singing an endless loop of Canned Heat's "Going up the Country"

OR

Having your hands replaced with screaming monkey heads (no, they cannot be removed)...

what would you choose?

This sort of question sets the tone of utter devastation. And no, DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!! Sure, we'd all rather be dead than spend the next 30-40 years with screaming monkey hands, but is that worse than singing frogs on your face? I don't know! I cannot say! But you may have to.



Then, once the answer-person anguishes and screams and finally decides upon a horrific fate, they might ask the question-person an equally soul-piercing question, or they may turn on the witness.

The witness, I might add, should not really say anything unless the answer-person simply cannot decide what should hypothetically befall them.

Now go forth and have fun with this game.

FUN QUICK MOVIE CHALLENGE!

So, the League and I were playing this game yesterday where given the choice of two movies, which would you rather see? Sounds easy, right? Not the way we play it - we have taken the 'lesser of two evils' approach. Example:

Mrs League: 'Ladybugs' or 'Ed'.
The League: (keep in mind the League had turned down 'Ladybugs' about 5 times at this point) ...SIGH....'Ladybugs'.

Nothing seemed to be able to top 'Ed' for the League. SO! My challenge to you, Leaguers is to come up with a movie that the League would rather see LESS than 'Ed'. Good Luck!



**Update: It has been helpfully suggested by Randy that I list what movies have already been tested against 'Ed'. Unfortunatly, I can't remember some of the candidates, but I do know these lost out (and please help me out, League if you remember):

Alien vs. Predator
Pure Luck
Batman & Robin
Ladybugs