Britney Watch!

Hello, and welcome to a new feature here at The League.

"I'd love to have a baby already. But I've got to take care of some things first ... I want to become a mother. I'm crazy about children ... next year, when I'm 23 I'll be ready."

Yes, life is pretty much over for America's little sweetheart.

This segment is dedicated to observing and enjoying the rapid descent of former teen-pop marshmallow, Britney Spears. I first became aware of Britney Spears when my co-workers downloaded her "one More Time" video (legally, I am sure) for viewing.

The Spice Girls were almost already a bitter-sweet memory, and the world was craving something newer, fresher, and less classy. And so many options! Christina Aguil... Aguila... Aguil... the slutty girl whose name I can't spell... Jessica Simpson, Shakira, and whomever the hell else. I don't know. Anyway, suddenly, no matter where you looked, there were annoying people with Pepsi contracts.

Hell, even Bob Dole wasn't afraid to make a buck from Pepsi and allow America's Britney-lust become a public joke.

Looking back, could we have predicted a child raised in show-biz and worshipped for her teen-age sex-kitten status would begin to flail a bit the second she was free of contractual and parental control?

Yes. Yes we could. But we never do. It's the hilariously tragic story of American celebrity, Leaguers.

We all remember the first signs of Britney cracking... the abrupt ending to her Mexico City show a few years back. The stupid snake thing at the MTV Video awards, the Madonna incident(s). But now... now Ms. Federline is 22, a millionaire many times over, and has already had the best day of her life she's ever going to have. So where does she go from here? Full-on celebrity implosion, my friends.

We don't need to relate the belabored wedding ceremony to car-wash refugee Kevin Federline, or the fact that she picked him up from his girlfriend (8 months pregnant with their second child). But we MUST get onboard this runaway train here at The League for the sheer entertainment value.

We're now taking bets on how many weeks/ months Ms. Spears will remain Ms. Federline, both professionally and legally.

In the meantime, we celebrate Mr. Federline. He has shown himself to have no character, but has still steered himself into marrying a millionaire. I can only suggest he enjoy the short and bumpy ride before he makes that final, crucial mistake, and Mrs. Federline begins reviewing her pre-nup.

Nothing this good ever happens in Arizona.

HEY, KIDS!!! IT'S A WHOLE NEW KIND OF MONKEY!!!

Love Pulp?
Love Shatner?

(the answer to that second question better be yes, or I disavow any knowledge of your existence...)

If you love these two pop culture icons, I can only recommend you go here.

For a whole album of Shatner ROCKING THE F**KING HOUSE, go here. And then go buy the album, you bastards.

Several cartoons appeared in newspapers yesterday in tribute to Christopher Reeve.

You can see a collection of them here. Link is from The Superman Homepage.

"But most will remember this sad day as the day the proudest, most noble man they ever knew finally fell. For those who loved him -- one who would call him husband, one who would be his pal, or those who would call him son -- this is the darkest day they could ever imagine. They raised him to be a hero: to know the value of sacrifice, to know the value of life. And for those who served with Superman in the protection of all life comes the shock of a failure: the weight of being too late to help. For a city to live, a man had given his all and more. But it's too late. For this is the day that a Superman died." - Superman #75, 1992 (written by Dan Jurgens)

--Mrs. League

Christopher Reeve has died at the age of 52.

As you've doubtless heard, actor and social activist Christopher Reeve died of complications on October 11th, 2004.

Mr. Reeve spent the past several years working tirelessly to help the many victims of paralysis by fundraising, encouraging research and working with congress. The loss of Mr. Reeve should only memorialize that which Mr. Reeve spent the latter part of his life working to achieve.

It would be dishonest of me to say that I didn't take a special interest in this cause due to Mr. Reeve's association with four Superman films and his appearances on Smallville. I suggest that, as a nice reminder of the joy he put into his work, that you watch one of the films this month. I'll be taking time out to watch Superman this week.

Out of respect for Mr. Reeve, I won't be posting for 24 hours. I ask that you take some time, instead of reading here, to visit the website for the Chrisopher Reeve Paralysis Foundation, and consider sending in a donation sometime this year.

Spent this weekend stripping paint off of the submarine so that we can add that nice chrome finish to the hull before we launch from Los Angeles and sail on to claim Catalina Island as our own, renaming the place "La Isla delos Bobos". Also bought a blue lightbulb and a mask. Tried to entertain Isaac, but it was past his bedtime. I established 3 towns and two cities, but in the end, my inability to have a good wheat crop was my downfall. And, also, my foolhardy plan to build a cross-island freeway was frought with peril.

Am intrigued with the inability of the Arizona Cardinals to win in the best of circumstances, disheartened at the loss of the Cowboys, and am proud UT didn't go down in a Hindenberg like mess as they have done in so many appearances at the Cotton Bowl. Ah, there's always those troglodytes from Bryan to beat up on when we're feeling low.

Fed up with politics and all political ideas, I am trying to avoid the debates, which come to ASU and the Frank Lloyd Wright designed structure a block from my office this coming Wednesday. Luckily, I no longer have a window, so those Secret Service bastards won't be able to shoot me without blasting a 2 foot crater through the damned hair salon. Not that the hair salon and I don't deserve it, for surely the secret service is aware that I've read the Majestic 12 papers and I'm on to those filthy swine. How dare they make a secret pact with Alien/ Nazis just to get the secret of rocket technolgy? Like they haven't had anti-megnetic drives whizzing home made saucers all over the upper atmosphere since 1951... Were we in that kind of race to the moon? Nonsense. We could have made it on the backs of a sea of disposable labor and by squeezing some ideas out of Irwin Allen and reading the latest from Julius Schwartz. I suspect those aliens duped us, anyway. Who ever heard of placing a man in a thimble at the top of a tube full of liquid explosive? Its foolhardy and only works as a party trick.

I am not voting. The democrats keep calling, 6 times a day. God bless caller ID. They'll get neither my money nor political support, for this year we put an end to the vote and select an emperor. The states become fiefdoms and we're kept under an uneasy truce by the emperor, who consolidates his/ her power by ensuring there's a low-level of constant bloodshed between his many fiefdoms. I'll work as a samurai in The Shining Land of the Enormous Hole in the Ground, protecting villagers and chasing off the barbarian hordes from Utah. It'll be great. I'm gonna wear a helmet and everything.

This webpage stinks, but if the commercials are any indication, My Big, Fat Obnoxious Boss is going to be EXACTLY the reality show I've been waiting for.

Thank you, Fox.

I really like this idea, although I have no verification from a legitimate entertainment news source.

Comicbookresources reports:

According to Latino Review, Steve Martin cut out of preparations for his stage play "Picasso at the Lapin Agile," playing in Palo Alto, CA. Why is this important? The allegation from a cast member's spouse is that he left to meet with Bryan Singer about taking on the role of editor-in-chief for a certain major metropolitan newspaper ... the Daily Planet's Perry White.

Latino Review has but one fault... usually they're so far ahead of the game, they're reporting meetings, etc... which DO happen, but usually its so early on that whatever they're reporting isn't definite yet, and things change after they report them.

I loved Michael McKean as Perry on Smallville, but I'd like to see Steve Martin in suspenders, too.

In case you missed it, the Scaled Composites group has claimed the X-Prize.

More importantly, civilians have taken the first step toward punching beyond Earth's gravity and taking us to the stars. I'm sorry. I can't believe this isn't the biggest news of the year.


Instead of a booster rocket, SpaceShipOne is carried into the air by this interesting craft before separating and launching from high up in the atmosphere

A crew of a few dozen people with private funding built and successfully tested a spacecraft capable of reaching space twice in a week. That's engineering. That's the kind of achievement we should be throwing parades for and fiestas and whatever the hell else.



While I'm a huge fan of NASA and government led space exploration, the fact that we live in a country and a time in which a small company can put together the technical know-how and ability to safely place a man in space and return him twice in a week? This is Wright Bros territory.


SpaceShipOne prepares to land

And yet the press treats these guys as if all they've done is eaten 50 hot dogs in a minute, or tied the land speed record or something. I mean, why don't we already know the names of these civilian astronauts? Shouldn't they be on the front page or be getting their face on Wheaties boxes or something?


SpaceShipOne returns safely to Earth

Read more about SpaceShipOne here.

I am literally having a bad hair day today. My hair is sticking up everywhere. My boss actually brought my co-workers into my office to come check out my bad hair.

I told them I didn't need their ridicule at a time liek this. I need their support. I got the ridicule instead.

So... if you've been avoiding watching the WB's "Smallville" because it seemed to hinge too much on being a Dawson's Creek show... The League has got both good and bad news.

The 4th season of Smallville shall henceforth be dubbed "Nakedville".

In the first two episodes, we spent an undue amount of time seeing a naked Clark Kent, and capped the episode with a naked moment from Lana Lang (craftily using a body double. Kristin Kreuk is lovely girl, but if that was her body in those shots, I'm Slim Goodbody).

Now that's either good news or bad news, depending on what you want out of your TV.

This evening's episode didn't feature a naked Clark, but it did have a naked Freak of the Week and wet and half-naked victim-guy. And there were some other various and sundry naughty scenes which are breaking new ground for Nakedville.

But here's the thing about the show which is making me uncomfortable this week, and maybe this happens all the time on the WB. You tell me. This is the only show I watch on the network.

Lana Lang is secretly dating one of the coaches at the high school. The character, 17 year-old Lana Lang, is dating a member of the faculty.

Now, she met Mr. Coach when they were both backpacking in Paris, as complained about LAST week. So, really, I didn't think much about what age the guy was supposed to be. I did think Lana's aunt is moving into criminally negligent territory for 1) leaving her frequently hospitalized niece behind in a town where she spends as much time in the hospital as out 2) letting her accident prone legally-a-minor niece go off to Europe without any supervision 3) abandoning her legally adopted niece because she met some dude who had no problem splitting legal guardian from legal liability.

Okay, so the aunt's not important, but what is creepy is that this ex-star of the Univ. of Metropolis football team is picking up high school girls in Europe and then moving to their po-dunk town and getting a job at their high school. Which makes him at least 22. Maybe 23.

So Mr. Coach is young and stupid, and he gave up Europe for Armpit, Kansas. But I think he'd at least have the common sense to know that a) this is a small town. Sooner or later, people are going to put 2-and-2 together and figure out he's dating Lana. b) this isn't just The League's prudish ways here. Faculty+student+smoochy = going to get him fired and blacklisted. And, depending on Kansas law, it could be construed as statuatory.

Begin tangential rant here: And we're supposed to believe there's a forgotten "drama room" in the school which the drama kids aren't already hiding out in to smoke cigarettes during study hall? Especially with all that cool junk in it? And what kind of budget does Nakedville high have, anyway, where they can have a room ful of props and costumes that isn't being used?
End tangential rant

Okay, League, you're tiredly saying to yourself. It's a TV show. And you're willing to accept that the guy from outer space can shoot fire out of his eyes, and yet you have a problem with the logic behind Mr. Coach?

Right, but it's dumb writing. There were a million ways to get this clown back to Nakedville from Paris. And its not that weird to have, say, a college guy dating a high school girl, or a guy working at the coffee shop, or the guy doing mime on the street or whatever... But a coach and a student... that's lazy. And the guy is going to be rich, anyway. Just watch.

Stalking your girlfriend from Paris doesn't make this guy appear romantic. It makes him the weird guy who's trolling for high school girls. Which, as my brother's criminal record can attest to, can get you in trouble.

To add to the mayhem, this season Lex (the already twice married Lex) now appears to be pining for Lana. Lex has got to be... what? 25? His Lana-love and tendency to hang out with high school kids pretty much makes Lex the billionaire Wooderson of Nakedville High.

I have to give the writers props, though. I am enjoying the Lois and Clark chemistry they're developing, and I still think that Erica-girl is making a great Lois.

Next week's Nakedville preview has hard-nosed reporter Chloe dressing up as a cheerleader and then more than likely getting naked. The League is setting the TiVO now.

I guess Nakedville is going for a lighter, sexier tone, but having a sexy plastic surgeon named "Dr. Fine" just drives the whole show toward a sort of campiness that isn't going to serve them well in the long run. I am enjoying the lighter touch for an episode or two, but after a while... let's say I hope this isn't indicative of the entirety of the rest of the season.

To make matters worse, I think I may be giving up on ABC's "Lost" already.

Given an opportunity to discover a major character's dark, dark secret, the writers used a dumb soap opera dodge so they can drag this out until I utterly don't care anymore.

Spoilers begin

Not a damn person alive would have told a wanted criminal that they didn't need to hear what the wanted criminal did wrong. Not after an FBI agent warned repeatedly about how "dangerous" the wanted criminal was. But our supposedly responsible friend the doctor tells criminal-Kate that "it's all in the past" or whatever horse hockey... That, my friends, is just stupid writing which not even the guys over at Passions would try to pull. I guarantee you, if Kate were a 400 pound dude in a Luchador mask, he would have been asking what happened.

Spoiler end

And that blonde girl is supposed to be annoying, but its working a little too well, if you know what I mean.

I am just getting a bad feeling about the way this showing is spinning into Soap Opera Island. I want to see some monsters, or I want my money back.

next time: The Legion of Super Heroes.

A special belated Thank You to Randy (who recently described The League as kooky...).

Randy located a DVD of the 1940's era Superman cartoons at Wal-Mart.

These cartoons were created by Fleischer Studios, and are a hallmark of animated achievement. In fact, the 1990's Bruce Timm/ Paul Dini batman series tried very hard to emulate the original quality of the these Fleischer cartoons in the art-deco style, dark atmosphere and Golden-Age America feel.



For my dollar, I'd just as soon catch these one-reel adventures as watch nearly any other motion-picture version of Superman. This is pure, unaltered, Seigle/ Shuster era Superman, when Superman was a sci-fi idea with limitless potential. In these cartoons, the Superman insignia (the familiar yellow and red "S" shield) is still black, yellow and red. Superman CAN'T FLY. He can jump astounding distances, but he's not really, truly airborne (ever wonder why "able to leap tall buildings in a single bound" was part of the Superman intro...?)

For more info on the cartoons, check out this link and this link to the Superman Homepage.

Thanks again, Randy! And I encourage all you folks who might see these DVD's on sale to pick them up. Cool stuff.

Hey, kids...

here's some Halloween fun!

Retrocrush presents The Top 100 Monsters of all Time

I think The Admiral has found my website.

This could be the end!

Ah... Halloween is just around the corner, my creepy little minions of morbid mirth!

And as such, The League must prepare!

Already at League HQ the decorations are in place and costumes are being planned for the annual candy dispersal. Pictures shall be forthcoming of the many chilling tsotchkes Jamie and I have dug up. We've already gotten the annual viewing of Frankenstein out of the way and will be moving through the League Library of horror favorites.


Salma Hayek atop a pumpkin is not just a good reason to celebrate Halloween, its a good reason to go on living.

This year The League has decided to try to slap together a Green Lantern outfit, just to see how many of the kids recognize who The League is. We think kids will recognize us. Jamie will once again go as perennial favorite: a bee.

A Batman-cape has already been slected for Mel. We shall see how this goes.

We haven't yet settled upon a candy to dispense, but those are details.

Because, my ghoulish guests, it's time for a little interactivity!

It's the 2004 Horrifically Hasty Halloween Heckstravaganza!

That's right, Leaguers. It's time for another creepy contest here at League HQ!


It seemed like such a swell idea at the time, just like this contest...

So what is this year's spine-chilling challenge?

It's Halloween storytime!

So dig deep into the spookiest place in your mind, slap on your writer's cap and submit a story in one or all of the following categories:

1) Best/ worst Halloween costume. Don't forget: Who, what, why, when and how.
2) Real life creepy stories, personal experience (must be SPINE TINGLING!!!!)
3) Real life scary stories, happened to someone else (must be TERRIFYING!!!!)

You may submit a story in each catgory. All entries WILL be published at The League, with a few stipulations.

1) Stories should be kept clean for the most part
2) Writers should avoid writing entire stories intended to make The League look like a jerk (this rule applies mostly to Mrs. League and Brother of League)
3) Stories MUST BE TRUE (as far as you know). False stories can be submitted to some other low-rent blog, but NOT this low-rent blog.



The Phantom contemplates what scary story HE might want to send to The League of Melbotis

Here's what's going to happen. This is your chance to get published here at The League with a truly scary story of your own. I'm going to cut and paste your story/ies and then publish. It's up to you to spell things correctly and have excellent grammar.

Try to get submissions in by Friday, October 22nd so we can spread the stories out throughout the week prior to Halloween. On the Friday before Halloween (October 29th) I will publish my favorite entry in each category. The winner will receive a grand prize worth almost $5.00 (or whatever is in the League treasury these days). All other entries will receive, oh... hell, I don't know. But if you send something in and include your snail mail, I'll send you something via USPS.

Does that sound good?


Drac waits for this Leaguer to wake up and begin her entry.

Submit all entries to Melbotis, who has our shared e-mail address over there on the left somewhere.

<------------- the arrow points to your left


This should be a frightfully good time!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

ahem.

Gordon Cooper, one of the original seven Mercury astronauts, dead at the age of 77.

The League is always looking to cultivate comics readership. Shamelessly campaigning for comics is one thing, but shamelessly campaigning for Superman is a little easier to slip under the radar.

Associates of The League who recently had themselves a kid may have found The League trying to win friends and influence people with the power of The Man of Steel.

Below is Isaac, seen here chillin' with Kal-El.

I think Jill sent me a picture of Arden w/ Superman, but I can't find it.

A Grand Day Out



That's one small step for a cat...

Mrs. League here. Jeff the Cat made his way into outer space (the backyard) yesterday for the very first time. What a brave, brave kitty. He didn't even barf or poop (his usual reaction to being removed from the safety of League HQ).



Outer space is tiring.



Mel doesn't know what the big deal is. Stupid cat.

A lot of people are going to want to talk about the debates. Not The League.

The League is going to want to talk about something ultimately more important, and that is: The new Burger King commercial where the dude "wakes up with The King."

This is The League's new favorite commerical. Why? This commerical:

1) Includes the return of the old 1970's Burger King mascot, The Burger King.
2) Has character in a plastic head
3) has a pleasingly disquieting way of selling breakfast

I always wonder why companies abandon mascots, but I like it even better when they bring them back. For example, I love the burger-headed guy McDonald's uses in its retro-style ads when they pretend to be a classic burger joint. So the return of the Burger King is timely and welcome.

When I think of the Burger King, I think of one of the final places I saw him before BK ditched him for... I guess Herb the Nerd.

In 1984, the Steans clan moved to Austin and frequented the BK at 183 and Anderson Mill Drive. Inside, they had free ballons for the kids, and regular air filled ballons not being good enough, they had a helium tank. It helps to know that the helium was dispensed from a mold of the Burger King's head. I believe it may have come from the mouth, but that can't be right.

Anyway, Jason and I had placed our order and were waiting for Dad to pay, and, hey... free helium, right? So Jason was just sucking back helium to make funny voices. And, so, with a brain full of helium and deprived of oxygen, dude just kind of flopped over on the floor. Which was funnier than I'm making it sound here. But all I can remember is looking for help and seeing that menacing frozen smile of The King as the curious looked over to see what that "thud" was.

Jason was okay, btw... he just went from being an honors student to being one of those kids in the back of class who doesn't talk much, likes to light things on fire and always smells like syrup.

On an unrelated note, I finally watched last night's episode of "Lost." The League is still somewhat skeptical even after two episodes, but we may have found a new show. Funny how it airs at exactly the same time as Smallville. Last year, this would have been a problem. God bless my DVR.

And, just to tease me all the more, the kid on the show was flipping through a DC comic a few years old starring the once profiled Green Lantern, Alan Scott and Flash 1, Jay Garrick. Kind of cool.

So Smallville has gotten off to a fairly good start this season. And since it's Clark's senior year in high school, someone at the WB corporate office has decided to up the nakedness level by a factor of five. It's nakedness, ahoy! on the USS Smallville.

I'm neither for nor against the nakedness, but it's an abrupt change and far more interesting than my senior year of high school.

I have to say I've been thoroughly impressed by the girl playing Lois, Erica Durance. I don't know if it's the scripting or the actor or the combination of both, but they seem to have finally breathed enough life into one of Clark's potential romantic interests for me to believe Clark would actually dig on her. From the publicity stills, I admit, I rolled my eyes and thought... "ah, another WB ingenue." But this dame is okay.

Unfortunately, Clark's previous romantic interest, Lana, has now been to Europe. And if high school and college taught me one thing: beware the folks who've just been touristing in Europe, for they will now spend endless hours (1) insisting they are now more cultured and refined and no longer recognize Mequite, TX as their place of origin (2) telling you stories that are exciting only to them (3) not seeing the irony that much of what they tell you about would seem silly if the exact same situation had happened in the States, insisting it's better because That's How They Do It in Europe (4) affecting some idiotic accent that's not really from the US, but it's not identifiably European, unless there's a secret land of Pretentiovia, and that's the secret accent of all who dwell there.

I'm being a little harsh, because The League never had funds to make it to Europe, and The League is, admittedly, a little bitter about that one. But The League has decided when he finally DOES go overseas, he's going to Tokyo. He thinks he's seen most of Europe on TV now and he's ready for some Japanese fun. And, Leaguers, I wanna eat a squid.

In addition to Lana's post-vacation sure-to-be-silly-and-who-cares-? subplots, she's now ditched pink for a more continental black. Actress Kristen Kreuk has decided that the new Paris-infused-Lana is going to be cranky. Whiney-Lana was bad enough, but now we've got three years of whiney under our belt, so I'm not sure dumping cranky on top of that is going to win me over as a viewer. Especially if we're to understand being a tourist in Paris justifies a turn to crankiness.

Anyhoo... after Smallville, I watched Nova from beginning to end. I know. Nova! I hardly ever watch Nova unless it's Sunday afternoon and I'm avoiding homework.

This episode was about the likelihood of finding intelligent life out there somewhere in space. And, unlike the video we watched when I was in 8th grade science with the the evil Ms. Napper, this video was actually fairly encouraging about our chances of finding intelligent life. You know... eventually.

The show's producers didn't suggest we're going to be palling around with awesome aliens tomorrow, but in the past 15 years, it appears that astronomers and astrobiologists have come to some new conclusions based upon mounting evidence that there could be many more planets out there like our own Earth than they once believed.

Using our own planet's history, they did plug a lot of reality into the situation, and did point out we ARE the only iPod slinging species on the planet, so I can see why the presence of life on a planet might not necessarily suggest that every planet teaming with life is going to sprout a SETI dish. Nonetheless, this program was better than that video in 8th grade which basically said: we are alone on our dinky little rock. We're a cosmic hiccup. Quit looking, you morons.

Luckily, Virgin Galactic will be there to take us to our new friends when we find them. (thanks to RHPT.com for the link)

Hey! Guess who just tracked me down? High school and college chum Madi "Mad Dog" Hinojosa.

God bless the magic of ego-driven/ self-delusional weblogging for making me dangerously easy to locate.

Last I saw of Madi, she was an English Major at UT. Well, I also thought I saw her once at a movie a few years later, but the movie was just about to start, and I didn't want to yell across the crowd. I also always think I see people I know, but then I'm wrong. It's invariably a complete stranger.

Madi is most famous for:

-reading a lot more than me (she reads those books WITHOUT pictures of people in tights)
-actually joining Amnesty International, and not just because she thought she might meet Bono
-Having a peculiar love of the original art from the AA Milne Pooh books
-Locating booze for me in college more than once
-Being the single most patient human being alive
-Is somehow related to Tish Hinojosa
-Having a perfectly formed plan to overtake North America which she just hasn't enacted yet

It's good to hear from Madi once again! Let's hope she replies to MY reply, and I get to catch up with my pal.

Smallville may tell the story of a young Clark Kent as he comes to terms with his destiny as Superman, but it also tells the story of a young Lex Luthor on his way to becoming a criminal mastermind.

For a quick look at WHY Lex turned evil, let's review from the pages of Superboy comics...



Yup. For years, Lex's early hairloss was the entire motivation for his criminal activity. Prior to that, he'd been Superboy's pal. I'm not really sure a lot of thought went into that one.

All you Wallace & Grommit fans will be happy to hear that Shaun the Sheep is getting his own show!

Yay Shaun! -- Mrs. League

Today will see the release of Smile, the lost Brian Wilson/ Beach Boys project.

It's taken 37 years, but the album is finally available.

How about them Cowboys?

Damn you Monday Night Football. You have swiped my Monday night away from me once again.

Mrs. League here. If you have a cat, you might be interested in:

The Infinite Cat Project

The most bizarre thing I've seen in quite a long time, and I have *got* to get Jeff the Cat involved. I wonder what they would do with a Mel picture looking at all of the kitties?

Okay.

So I'm driving into work, and the car in front of me is going sort of slow on this stretch of road which is marked as a 40MPH zone, but which is usually driven at 50-55 (it's a 4 lane road with a median).

I look up at the driver and I notice that he's:

smoking a cigarette
enjoying a cup of coffee
reading the paper

Wow. I'm not really sure if I was (a) terrified of this sort of willfull stupidity, or (b) if I really admired the guy for his moxie. Clearly, he did not have the same kind of quality instruction I once received at The Austin Driving School (who once had the odd slogan: We taught a burro to drive, people are easy). Instructor Joe would never let us smoke and drink and read while we were at the wheel, no matter how much we begged.

The guy was going the speed limit, but not with traffic... and unfortunately everyone behind me was speeding up and going around me, so I couldn't even pass the guy. I considered leaning on the horn, but I was afraid of what that would stir up if he spilled his coffee or dropped his cigarette.

How is it I can barely drive with my hands at 2 and 10 o'clock and totally focused and some guys can drive while partaking of a ritual which usually involves a couch? I am so jealous.

The Texas Longhorns were once again victorious over the lowly Rice Owls in Saturday's match-up. Well done, Horns!

I think the Sun Devils may have won their game, but I got distracted and never finished watching the game.

On The Brother's recommendation, we saw Shaun of the Dead yesterday afternoon. Quality, quality film and I highly recommend it. The movie has "cult film" written all over it, and should have been released two weeks into October to take advantage of folks looking for a good Halloween scare.

The movie rides similar lines to Evil Dead 2, managing to be both funny and to have some genuinely frightening moments.

I kept thinking Jim D. should see this flick all throughout. It keeps with the standard zombie formula, but has it's own little bits to add. Worth matinee.

Anyway, I logged on to do some work and homework, so I should probably get to it.

Real life Lemmiwinks?

Actually, this is kind of creepy if you've been reading Grant Morrison's We3 from DC/ Vertigo comics. You kind of have to have read the issue.

Soak in the horror of....

'The Last Starfighter', the Musical

--Mrs. League

The League's personal hero, Russ Meyer, dead at the age of 82.

God rest your soul, Russ. And thanks. You gave us all a lot... to, uh, think about.

Reason number 1209 that Oprah is annoying.

Those free cars? Could cost the unwitting recipients $7000 in taxes.

Of course $7K is what Oprah spends on slippers in a year, so I wonder if the figure even means anything to her.

Bottom line is, I'm betting most of these peopel don't end up keeping the car unless they were planning on getting a new car soon, and something very similar.

Happy Elephant Appreciation Day!
--Mrs. League

Apparently The Pixies played here last night and I missed them. I am an idiot.

Luckily, they are swinging back through Phoenix on OCT. 22.

I have already purchased my tickets. For Pixies tour dates (no, they are not visiting Beaumont. I can't believe it either...) click here.

Unfortunate update

Jamie tells me this is the same day her folks are coming to town.

Despite being a fan on and off since I was 15, I have never seen The Pixies. They may never tour again. I have just spent an inordinate amount on tickets.

I have to think Judy would WANT for me to go to the show.

Jim D. comments upon the release of the Star Wars trilogy on DVD.

And he says what we're all thinking far better than we would have said it.

If we can sue the Federal Government to get them to release papers, can we sue Uncle George to get our movie back?

DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!!

Jason (The League's brother) returned from college with all kinds of new-fangled ideas, but one of my favorite was the best game in the world.

DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION

This game spawned the movie game listed below, and the rules are simple.

Have at least two players (although three or more is preferable so there is always a horrified witness).

Now, one person is the question-person, and the other is an answer-person.

You will take tunrs in each role, but the question person's job is to dream up an absolutely horrific situation. Now dream up another. Now present these two options to the answer-person. The Answer-person must select between one of the two horrible fates dreamed up for them, and they cannot say "I don't know." They MUST answer. And, yes... DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!!

The question I like to kick a new game off with is this (and it's a borrowed one, so fogive me for not being original):

If you had the choice between:

four magical tree frogs stuck to your face for the rest of your life, constantly singing an endless loop of Canned Heat's "Going up the Country"

OR

Having your hands replaced with screaming monkey heads (no, they cannot be removed)...

what would you choose?

This sort of question sets the tone of utter devastation. And no, DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!!! Sure, we'd all rather be dead than spend the next 30-40 years with screaming monkey hands, but is that worse than singing frogs on your face? I don't know! I cannot say! But you may have to.



Then, once the answer-person anguishes and screams and finally decides upon a horrific fate, they might ask the question-person an equally soul-piercing question, or they may turn on the witness.

The witness, I might add, should not really say anything unless the answer-person simply cannot decide what should hypothetically befall them.

Now go forth and have fun with this game.

FUN QUICK MOVIE CHALLENGE!

So, the League and I were playing this game yesterday where given the choice of two movies, which would you rather see? Sounds easy, right? Not the way we play it - we have taken the 'lesser of two evils' approach. Example:

Mrs League: 'Ladybugs' or 'Ed'.
The League: (keep in mind the League had turned down 'Ladybugs' about 5 times at this point) ...SIGH....'Ladybugs'.

Nothing seemed to be able to top 'Ed' for the League. SO! My challenge to you, Leaguers is to come up with a movie that the League would rather see LESS than 'Ed'. Good Luck!



**Update: It has been helpfully suggested by Randy that I list what movies have already been tested against 'Ed'. Unfortunatly, I can't remember some of the candidates, but I do know these lost out (and please help me out, League if you remember):

Alien vs. Predator
Pure Luck
Batman & Robin
Ladybugs

Busy week last week at The League. But not an unpleasant one.

Nathan and Renata were here from Wednesday evening to early Friday morning, and that was quite a bit of fun. Nathan is/ should be some sort of celebrity. He once appeared in a notorious episode of Who Wants to be a Millionaire?, back during it's why-is-this-show-on-five-times-a-week-? heyday. He was the guy who entertained Regis with his stuffed monkey.

Nathan is now a DJ and program manager at Texas Public Radio in San Antonio. Renata is Minister of Information for one of the universities in San Antonio.

Both of them are a lot of fun, and it stinks that we don't live closer to them so we can see them more often.

Friday and Saturday were lazy days. We mostly lolled about on Saturday, and I tried to read some comics I had stacked up. I hadn't yet had a chance to open up my Criterion edition of Slacker, so Saturday afternoon I popped that one in the player and gave it a whirl.

I saw Slacker the first time during the summer after I moved out of Austin. My mother packed us all into the GMC conversion van and hauled us down to the River Oaks Theater. I loved the movie then, and I still like it now. And now, it's a little like looking back at a moment in time.

The acting in the movie is still stilted and awkward, and the characters and dialogue are still going to drive a good portion of the audience nuts. Reviews of the movie on Amazon.com usually go from fawning to outrage, and there's seldom any space in between.

I only watched a few items on the first disc aside from the film itself. I look forward to hearing the audio commentary by Linklater and Co. I did watch the ten minute commercial for an upcoming documentary on Les Amis, the now defunct cafe which sat on 24th street across the way from the Castillian. The doc won't mean much to people who never lived in Austin, but it did hold some interest.

And there's a whole other disc which I haven't opened up yet.

For some bizzaro reason, Jamie and I watched all of the DMX/ Jet Li "package" film, Cradle 2 the Grave. DMX is NOT a good actor, and Jet Li is visibily bored during most of the movie. Anthony Anderson is just creepy to see in any movie, now that he's facing sexual assault charges.

The title of the movie has no relevancy to the plot, characters or anything which occurs in the movie. Jamie has hypothesized that DMX just liked the phrase. We're not sure.

There's also quite a bit of casual racism, and a little bit of little-person abuse in the course of the movie, but, you do get to see Jet Li kick a lot of people in the head. For some reason, the bad guy's ending is similar to the of Belloq in Raiders.

JLU kicked ass. One of the best episodes this season. Even if they did blow up Red Tornado.

Now we're planning Thanksgiving and Christmas. I've already purchased airplane tickets, so look out LAWTON, OKLAHOMA!!!! It's gonna be a funky, funky Christmas.

Okay, this is weird. When I went to link to a website with this image, the first one to come up was The League... I am the snake eating it's own tail.

The League Reviews: Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow

So Mrs. League and I went to the cinema early to catch a showing of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. And I did enjoy the movie, but not as much as I thought I should have.

From a plot standpoint, the movie holds together as well or better than most sci-fi movies. The plot is fairly standard sci-fi fare, and is pretty much as advertised. From a story standpoint, I had some issues. I never really knew who the hell these guys were.

Okay, Mrs. League just walked in the room and said "Are you ruining Sky Captain for everybody?"
"No."
"I liked that movie way more before you started going 'this was this' and 'this was that'. You're going to ruin it for everybody."
So apparently I ruined the movie for Jamie. Whoops.

Why does she say this? If, apparently, you don't want the movie ruined for you, stop reading now and go on with your peaceful life.

If you're still reading, I apologize in advance for ruining everything.

What is the big issue? Sky Captain is, as advertised, an homage to the past. A past of science fiction and pulp and Saturday matinees. I can dig it. But... (and this is the League, so there's always a complaint, right?) Sky Captain takes and takes and takes, and I'm not sure what it ever gives back.



Spoilers --- start here

Dodging between outright nods to some sources (Godzilla, Buck Rogers, a handful of others) and taking without acknowledging from others (Nick Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D., Blackhawk, Superman cartoons) and tying in other movies (King Kong), one wonders exactly what's left here that IS Sky Captain.

Polly (played by Paltrow) is Lois Lane. The Robots are from the Superman cartoon "The Mechanical Monsters", Sky captain is an amalgamation of Captain Midnight and Blackhawk. Frankie (Jolie) is Nick Fury with boobs, right down to the helicarrier and eye-patch. She's kind of leading a British SHIELD squadron.

The villain's plot is stolen from the cover of Amazing Stories (which, of course, I now can't find).

One thing that drove me nuts but I couldn't place until later... You catch a glimpse of a sunken ship at one point, and the ship is titled "Venture". That, kids, is the name of the ship taken to Skull Island in King Kong. Which makes me wonder, is the island in the movie supposed to be Skull island with it's exotic creatures? Or the Island of Dr. Moreau? We don't know. It seems to be both.

And, kids, I LOVE homage. I love to see things pop up which I can recognize and say silently to myself "cooooooool, I am so in on the joke..."

My point here is, Sky Captain is a fun movie with non-stop homage, but I wasn't really sure what it gave back. There's no new story here, although it does recycle fun parts of existing movies, so, take from that what you will...

My other concern, which is only tangentially tied to the movie, is this: When or if the original sources should wish to take themselves seriously again, or gain screentime again... will audiences look to them as copies of Sky Captain, or will they know which came first? Jamie says "I think you're giving audiences too much credit." And maybe she's right.

But with both a Superman and a King Kong movie in pre-production, do they stand a chance of not being unfavorably compared? I don't know.

----Spoilers end here---

Now, Sky Captain is amazing to look at. It is absolutely gorgeous, and the line between reality and CG is completely lost. These guys did amazing work.

The acting and editing of some scenes seems a little flat, but here's my recommendation: Do this movie right. See it on a Saturday afternoon, kick back and let it wash over you. Be 11 years-old again and eat a bag of popcorn during the movie.

Watch giant robots fill the screen, watch Gwyneth Paltrow show some leg, watch airplanes dogfight in the middle of Manhattan. This movie is pretty damn cool, so you can safely ignore my spoilerish comments above.

The bottom line is that I WANT movies like Sky Captain. I want movies that know and relish a form of action film that has been supplanted with machine gun toting steroid freaks and Keanu Reeves. There's room for all of it out there, but my favorite genres are the ones that smell a little musty and are maybe a little creaky.

I want giant robots and plucky reporters. I want mad scientists and secret islands. Hell, I guess I want Sky Captain.

here's something fun for people who love both Crayola Crayons and Spider-Man.

Spider-Man reviews a new box of Crayola's.

It's babies 'a poppin' here at The League these days.



First, Jill sprouted hard-rockin' baby, Arden. Then League pals, Ryan & Trisha, dropped Isaac upon an unsuspecting world. Now college pal, Anna (Mitchell) Clark and her husband, Luke, have brought us our latest installment. Theodore Robin is now proudly wreaking havoc in the greater Conroe, TX area.

Well done, Anna! And let's all give little TR a big "welcome to the world" thumbs up. The little dude has a lot of work ahead of him and needs some encouragement.

I also hear that another Loyal Leaguer may soon be a soccer-Dad, but that's a lot of heresay and innuendo.

The League has no children, and does not believe Melbotis would tolerate them, anyway. Mel tried to eat a kid a few years ago on Halloween, so we're going to keep cool on the kid front down at League HQ. Until Mel is ready, it's just not up for discussion.

Marvel Zombie (and, coincidentally, fan of zombie comics) Jim D. called me yesterday to alert me that he had, in fact, enjoyed Identity Crisis #4.

Identity Crisis is the DC Comic which is getting attention from CNN, AP and other locations. And, yeah, for some rather grim content, it's a pretty darn good read.

"Steeeeeeeans!" Jim D. declared, "You gotta read it!"
"I'm at work."
"You gotta read it now!"
"I'm about to enter into a phone conference with China."
"You gotta read it. Supes is totally getting into it!"

Now, Jim's a fan of Marvel, which is the rival to DC Comics. And comic fans are prone to select a house style they like (DC or Marvel) and that's their camp. I ride both sides of the fence, but when push comes to shove, I guess I fall into the DC camp. Couldn't tell you why, but I do.

But even Jim himself finds it significant that he's enjoying a DC book this much, when he'd rather be spending his hard-earned dough on Captain America or X-men, Spidey, I suppose (or a comic starring the living dead).

I often think of DC as an acquired taste, but I don't mean that in a snooty "it's what REAL comic readers read...". I just mean that either you dig DC, or you don't. And very few people actually begin reading comics anymore through DC. Most folks start with X-men or Spider-Man and then branch out.

DC, to me, wears a certain complexity to how their books interconnect which I find rewarding. Marvel is more complex on the character level, I am told, and books like Daredevil have really given credence to the stereotype. In fact, I don't know how many DC books I would even throw at a first-time comic book reader.

I did blaze through Identity Crisis #4 while I listened to the teleconference (which I didn't even need to be there for). And Jim is right. It was a great read, and Superman is, in fact, getting into the thick of things.

Identity Crisis is progressing well, and is going to be a significant event in DC comics for quite a while. Meanwhile, Greg Rucka is also writing soem terrifc Superman comics over in Adventures of Superman, Chuck Austen is spiralling out of control and quality in Action Comics, and the Azzarello/ Lee team still has me captivated by "For Tomorrow", a 12-part series running monthly in Superman comics.

Meanwhile, Loyal Leaguer Nathan Cone (and his lovely wife, Renata), have arrived. We had a nice dinner and then retired to League HQ to get some bedrest. Mrs. League immediately took them into the Fortress to show off what too much money and too little brains can accomplish when coupled with OCD.

Today Nathan and Renata are going to check out some Frank Lloyd Wright stuff about town, and then take in a D-Backs game.

Mel is also thoroughly excited to have them here (though they were previously unacquainted), and he has not been shy about displaying his affection.

Hello Leaguers - Mrs. League here. I feel as though I should entertain you while the League is a busy bee at work. Unfortunately, nothing too thrilling has happened recently in beautiful Maricopa county. We're still in the middle of summer2 (our seasons here are spring, summer1, summer2, and fall) which after four months of 100+ heat makes you want to lie down and give up. Seriously, it will be in the 100s for at least another month.

We haven't even seen any movies recently, although the League is eagerly awaiting the release of Funkey Monkey. I personally thought he would rather see the flying robots, but I guess primates + Matthew Modine win every time.

I guess we haven't had a Melbotis or Jeff the Cat update recently. Melbotis had a bath on Sunday, and proceeded to make a beeline for his beloved dirt patch the second he was released to freedom in the backyard. For this, he got the hose, which is high on his list of Mel-fears. (This includes smoke detectors, flashlights, vacuums, and small children.) Jeff the Cat has been unnervingly normal recently, which leads me to believe he is plotting something...

And I leave you with the best job in the world.

Busy.

Here's Adam Strange and the Omega Men.

In defense of my mom, she no longer wears a fanny pack. It has been replaced by a fashionable leather purse.

--Mrs. League

Two quick news items:

Batman remains in greater England, this time appearing at Buckingham Palace.

Ever notice how you never see Batman and Prince Charles in the same place...?

And, just in case you saw the photos and you're wondering, I believe Batman has given up his utility belt for a fanny pack. My mother-in-law is in good company.

And this one comes from Mrs. League:

Apparently there's a new consumer grade truck. No, not a pick-up, a TRUCK, like they use to mix cement or carry mobile homes. Now you can have one of your very own...

Says Mrs. League:

"For personal use, it's for people who want to make a
statement."

Statement = I'm an a**hole.

I don't know if the folks where you live have the same excitement over Hummers that the good people of Scottsdale, AZ have for these symbols of over-compensation, but there are a surprising number of these things on the road out here. Apparently owning a hummer entitles you to ignore all previously established traffic laws and create your own on the fly. If others don't go along with your new rules? Penalty of death or crippling injury. Luckily, since most of them are painted a Sesame Street-approved canary yellow, you can always see them on the road.

Bring on The Batman

Saturday saw the debut of the new WB! cartoon for kids, The Batman.

If I were a kid, that cartoon would have had me hopping about madly, tossing anything resembling a batarang around the house for hours. Not being a kid, there was substantially less hopping, but it pretty much had the same effect.

Here's the weird part... that isn't so much really Batman as I've known him for 27-28 years. This is formative Batman, chronologically 3 years into being Batman, a few months from meeting Dick Grayson (Robin 1) Batman. But this Batman doesn't reside in stately Wayne Manor. Instead, this Batman lives in a sweet loft/ warehouse-thing in the middle of Gotham (and on top of a cave?).

Logistically, I guess this makes more sense. And at one point in the late 70's or early 80's, Batman lived in a penthouse overlooking Gotham. So I guess you can say they borrowed that idea, or else decided Batman doesn't need no stinking commute.

The supporting cast is the strangest part. Sure, Alfred is still there. But Bullock, Gordon, Montoya, Cris are all MIA. Instead, we have sort of analogs to those characters with different names. I have no idea why they bothered to do that, or why they cut out Gordon altogether.

The animation is nice, with quick, well-choreographed action. The voice casting is done well, even if I miss Kevin Conroy as Batman (he's been the voice of Batman since about 1992). The voice of The Joker is well-done as well, but it's so close to Mark Hamill's depiction, I kind of wondered why they hired a new guy.

Apparently the show will have embedded signals in it which will activate your Bat-Wave ready Batman toys, or, possibly, shut down Uncle Fester's pace maker. Either way, it should liven up the cartoon hour. (Something about the TV turning on devices in my home creeps the hell out of me).

All that said, I loved this week's JLU episode with 80's DC superstar Booster Gold.

The team putting together JLU has walked away from the two-part Grant Morrison-wannabe epics, added more characters than Gardner Fox would have wanted to deal with, and taken the tone up a few notches in levity. I think the results are impressive (except for Hawk and Dove, which was kind of lame). Sure, each episode is focusing on introducing us to a new DC hero, but prior episodes were just introducing us to new DCU villains, so I'll take this format any day.

JLU is not going to be for the folks who want every super hero to be a dark and brooding Batman or Wolverine clone. That isn't, and never has been, the DC way. DC agrees that it takes a certain kind of weirdo to dress up in tights and fight crime, just not necessarily a depressing weirdo. Sometimes these weirdoes are people from the future trying to make a quick buck in the past, such as Booster Gold.

I encourage you to catch the episode if you haven't already. It also has appearances by Elongated Man (Ralph Dibney), Stars and S.T.R.I.P.E., The Shining Knight, Huntress, and a few others. It was a lot of fun.

Oh, and I also heartily recommend the new cartoon "Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends". It's by the same guy who created the Power Puff girls.

Loyal Leaguer Nathan Cone and his lovely wife, Renata, will be ditching San Antonio for the Grand Canyon State later this week. Jamie and I have scrubbed and cleaned Melbotis in eager anticipation.

Watched UT win last night in spite of themselves. If last night's performance was any indication, I can't watch the Oklahoma game at all. Not without without wearing a bag over my head.

Watched the Cowboys and Cardinals lose today while I was doing other things. Did some homework, and aside from that, not much this weekend. Did some homework. Bleah.

Oh, and the Krypton Kruiser is in the shop. This should make tomorrow's commute a real joy. Hopefully it'll be healthy again early this week.

Dear Japan...

Shadow Basketball

Frank Thomas, one of the "Old Men" of Disney animation, has passed on.

I read about this at The Beat. Go here for Heidi's article.

I need to get out my VHS copy of "Frank & Ollie" this weekend.

Heidi also uncovered some stills from the Frank Miller/ Robert Rodriguez movie, Sin City.

I have a few of the trades, and, man, am I looking forward to this movie.

Margot Kidder, the Lois Lane of the 1970's and 80's, is going to be on Smallville!

She's not playing Lois Lane, but it's great to see her getting involved.

Here's the article from SupermanHomepage

KryptonSite have learnt that Margot Kidder will be making an appearance in the fourth season of "Smallville".
Superman fans of course know Margot Kidder as Lois Lane from the Christopher Reeve "Superman" movies. It appears that Margot Kidder will be playing a character by the name of Bridgette Crosby, an emissary to Dr. Virgil Swann (Christopher Reeve).

Scheduled to appear in at least two episodes, Margot Kidder will first appear in the premiere episode of this new season, before returning again in the sixth episode.

DC's Identity Crisis gets attention on the AP.

Now Jamie will know why I didn't hand her the second issue.

I'm stuck on hold on the phone and I just realized something.

Muzak of Natalie Merchant songs sound exactly like regular Natalie Merchant songs.

feliz navidad

Man, that's the last post about comics for awhile. I can hear the crickets chirping from here.

Jaws in thirty seconds - performed by bunnies.

--Mrs. League

Comic Books, Comics Scholarship and a Terrific Reading List for People Who Want to Get Into Comics but Think Superheroes are Dumb

Several days ago, Jim D. sent me a FAX at work. Apparently Jim is auditing HNRS 3161 (02), Comic Book Novels and Their Culture

The class is being offered at Lamar University, and is one of the growing crop of courses being taught by guys who, in 1986, stopped while reading The Dark Knight Returns and said to themselves: this is way better than that dumb book I'm reading in school. And thusly, Comics scholarship was born.

I find the readings interesting. I've read almost all of them.

Art Spiegelman's Maus
Frank Miller's Batman: The Dark Knight Returns
Alan Moore's Watchmen
Daniel Clowes' Ghost World
Chris Ware's Jimmy Corrigan

I have not yet read Neil Gaiman's Violent Cases

The idea of comics scholarship is an odd one. On the one hand, it offers people a chance to see the potential of the graphic medium for storytelling, and offers the potential to lay the literary establishment on its ear as comics are recognized to be a viable mode of storytelling within the hallowed halls of "those who know better".

On the other hand, who is going to register for this class who isn't already clued into the world of comics? My guess is, everyone in that class will have already read at least Dark Knight and Watchmen. The guys in the berets will have already read Ghost World and Jimmy Corrigan. A few will have read Maus because they thought they probably should. There might be a few indie rock girls who read Ghost World, but I don't think this is going to get popular with sorority girls looking for an easy-A.

The readings are the list of comics I'd give to my English Major friends when they say that all you need to know to know everything about comics is, "comics, oh yeah. Well, everyone knows Batman and Robin are closet homosexuals."* So aside from some assertions made by the late (and perennial fan-boy whipping boy) Frederic Wertham, what do these books have to offer?

A pretty wide array, if just from this small sampling. Ghost World and Jimmy Corrigan live in a microcosm, live and breathe with small characters living in a small world. The characters are real people, instantly recognizable as people from your high school or maybe from the post office.

Clowes' art is instantly recognizable, being simultaneously a red-headed step-child of 1970's indie comics and perhaps the master of this slice of a slice of a genre. He doesn't do much to fuzz with the use of sequential-art storytelling in Ghost World (not as he'd later do with Eightball #23, "Death Ray"), but his characters are utterly believable to look at, and their dialogue, etc... is painfully familiar.

Jimmy Corrigan is going to live on for decades as the culmination of a world-class obsessive compulsive disorder and a microscopic eye for detail. Confession time: I'm not a huge fan of Jimmy Corrigan. I can appreciate what Ware is doing, and I actually am very happy to have a copy of the book just to marvel at the work put into it, but the story didn't really do much to either move me or grab me. That said, from a scholarship standpoint (and that's what we're discussing here, right?) this may be one of the most important comic books ever published. Without getting all esoteric on you, Ware's understanding of use of the panel and sequential art may be unparalleled and shows a unique genius for conveying time, depth, emotion with the simple use of time compression and expansion in those tiny spaces between the panels. His art is sharp, clear and industrial, and, honestly, I have no idea how he does it (but I suspect he's using a Mac).

Ware had a strong follow up with Quimby the Mouse last year. I bought a beautiful hardcover copy, which I immediately f**ked up in my suitcase on the plane on the way home from Austin.

Maus gets mixed reviews in the comic book fan-world, but in literary realms, the book is pretty much universally praised. It is NOT an allegory, but a mix of semi-autobiographical material and recollections of stories of Art Spiegelman's father. Essentially, Maus tells both the story of Art Spiegelman and his father as they work on their relationship in Art's father's twilight years. Meanwhile, Art is collecting stories from his father who was a prisoner in a Nazi concentration camp.

For reasons I'll leave for the reader to decide, the characters are mostly portrayed as mice, with Nazis portrayed as cats. It's not Animal Farm (as I said, it's not allegory, really). Instead, Maus uses the unique format of comics to bring implied understanding and meaning to the situation with animal-themed visual cues.

Regarding scholarship, Maus has been infiltrating literature classes for years, so omission from the list of readings would be considered a gross oversight. Again, if we're studying comics as a unique art form, we're not looking just at the pictures alone, nor just the story, but the collaboration between the two. Maus's use of animal imagery is largely where the success of the medium comes into play, as well as well-timed beats and juxtaposition of Art's father's matter-of-fact recounting and the way in which the actual scenes are depicted.

Curiously, the complaints from comic fans seem to stem from a dislike of the animal-imagery, and a general feeling of distaste for the subject matter, being too serious for some readers, or somehow not connecting with them. This particular debate is, to me, a curious beast, as I don't feel Maus is in any way overly complicated.

I'll forego my usual gushing comments about Dark Knight Returns and Watchmen. What I will say is that these two books are considered the pinnacle of superhero storytelling, and that's different from just successful comic-form storytelling.

The instructor for Jim's class has wisely avoided adding too many superhero comics (the money generator of the comics' industry) in favor of quality comic books which can appeal to a wider audience. This is a double-edged sword as most comics are super-hero and sci-fi based, but the selection of readings also gives a chance for people who are super-hero adverse to explore the medium. However, the instructor has included two comics which use superheroes and the ideas behind superheroes to explore issues of power, abuse of power and character exploration of larger than life characters in a way which your average comic may not do.

The impact of Watchmen and Dark Knight irreversibly changed the way in which superheroes are looked upon by their own greatest fans, and has given way to innumerable new stories looking at the ways in which those in power must behave responsibly. Prior to these efforts, the clunky moralism of early Spider-Man and perhaps the 1970's Neal Adams efforts on Green Lantern/ Green Arrow were significant efforts and an interesting approach to unwieldy topics usually left out of comics altogether.

Dark Knight and Watchmen asked only that their characters have motivations and behave according to those motivations. The publication of these two books cemented a path toward an adult readership which continues to this day.

I am very surprised by the omission of Scott McCloud's Understanding Comics, which is, perhaps, best read by folks already exposed heavily to the comics medium (I always believed web designers would get a kick out of it, too).

Also, both Will Eisner's "fictional" work (Fagin the Jew, A Contract with God, The Spirit) and his instructional manuals (Comics & Sequential Storytelling)are completely overlooked despite their importance within the industry.

I think work from either McCloud or Eisner would be absolutely necessary for such a class, but I'm not teaching it, so...

Look, obviously comics are my great obsession. And I could name a dozen more books totally deserving to be on this class's must read list (Rocket Raccoon, hello? anyone? No?), but I'm just thrilled to see this sort of course making it's way into the great halls of learning.

I am not suggesting that comics are as important as, say, Government 101. But comics originated in the US as a true art form, and probably have as much right to have their own class as the History of Elvis Presley class taught here at my employing university (I seriously want to take that class). Additional courses could include European comics, Japanese comics, or "Why can't anyone tell Clark Kent is Superman?"

Discussing comic scholarship within the comic fan community is an utter nightmare, if message boards are any indication. Many fans do not appreciate folks like Ware and Clowes entering into their realm without an idea for a caped and masked avenger in tow. Many complain the books are boring, and there's a general sense of "who do these guys think they are?", which almost suggests that these readers don't, ultimately, believe in the comics form enough to think it can hold up under the weight of stories which are not flights of fancy.

Many, many of these posters, to nobody's surprise, just do not appear to understand the stories they have read. I know. That's a little harsh, but there are some real knuckleheads on comics message boards.

I wish Jim good luck, and I look forward to hearing all about the nonsense with which his instructor fills his head.

*quick note: There is a whole field of study regarding the sexuality of superheroes, stemming mostly from Batman and Robin. Look, if that's how people want to read it, go for it. There's a similar situation with Star Trek and Kirk and Spock. I could care less. Just keep in mind, Wertham and his book in the 1950's almost shut down the whole damn industry.

this is the sort of thing that makes a portion of the comics population downright wet themselves.

Looks like Joss Whedon, creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel and Firefly is doing some interesting things:

1) I never saw Firefly, but he's turned the cancelled show into a Hollywood sci-fi movie called Serenity.

2) Whedon has been writing the new X-men comic entitled "Astonishing X-Men." It's pretty good. ASTONISHINGLY good? That for you to decide...

3) Now rumors are mounting that Whedon is involved in X-Men 3, recently abandoned by Bryan Singer (who left to make the new Superman flick)

Is this good news? Sure, why not...

I never watched Buffy after Season 2 or so. I never watched Firefly, never watched Angel, but folks love that stuff the same way X-Fans love X-Men. So it sounds like a good match to me.

Phoenix Saga, here we come...

1) See my Aunt - done

2) Put comics in boxes - done

3) See Hero - done

4) read my JLA vs. Avengers collection - done

5) Watch JLU - done

6) Clean the house - uhmmm

7) go to the gym at least twice - well, once. But I took Mel for two lovely walks.

8) Eat some grilled chicken and wild rice - Uhmmm... not quite, but I did okay. Chicken fajitas. God bless McCormick's and their little pouches of spices. Also, I busted out the grill at Jamie's request. We kicked off our Fall tradition a few weeks early (as it was an unnaturally low 95 degrees) and had brauts.

I gotta say, I liked Hero quite well. As I told Jamie, it's nice to walk out of a movie and to not to have to dig for a compliment, settling upon "yeah, that was cute." Beautifully shot, incredible combat choreography, and a solid story to boot. As I was mostly reading subtitles, I guess the acting was good, but it's tough to say.

The movie did leave me with a few nagging questions which had nothing to do with the actual movie itself, but the point it made. Anyway, good movie, and it didn't have any aliens OR predators to make it stink.

JLU was also an interesting episode. I've been a fan of "The Question" since back in the 80's, and I loved the take on him they had in JLU. A boy-band humming nutjob martial-artist/ conspiracy theorist...? It's so close to a description of my dad, I had chills. Anyway, I know The Question won't make too many more appearances, but it was great to see the DCU's resident nutjob on TV. BTW, I have no idea who this Galatea person is, but she sure looked like Power Girl to me... any one else?

I am such a nerd.

I'm not sure why in my 3rd year here I have forgotten, but I can't get Texas games here. I can get Oklahoma and Oklahoma State. But Texas? No way.

Dammit.

How can it be college ball season if I can't watch UT?

And you didn't think you had any options this election year...

click on the picture for more info on The League's compulsory candidate

What will next befall League guiding light and all around influence "Weird" Al Yankovic?

Nathan, for some reason I think I was with you when I saw Weird Al at Astroworld.

Can that possibly be right? It seems right.

All I want to do this weekend in order:

1) See my Aunt

2) Put comics in boxes

3) See Hero

4) read my JLA vs. Avengers collection

5) Watch JLU

6) Clean the house

7) go to the gym at least twice

8) Eat some grilled chicken and wild rice

All I want to do this weekend in order (by Mrs. League):
1) See Sir Isaac Neaderhiser (our friends the Neaderhisers had a kid. His name is Isaac.)
2) Put Jeff in a box
3) See Spidey one last time
4) Finish reading War of the Worlds
5) Watch football....dammit, the season hasn't started yet - I hate preseason!
6) Clean the cat box
7) Think about going to the gym
8) Eat

**Edited to add that Blogger is messed up. I wrote this as a counterpart to The League's tale of weekend fun and it posted it before. Go read his first.

It's just. too. easy.

--Mrs. League

God.
Door.
Window.

The new WB! cartoon "The Batman"..? My fears that the show was going to be more "kiddie" that the Bruce Timm/ Paul Dini show are gone.

Watch Batman v. Bane in Quicktime.

I think my boss is trying to get rid of me...

ALIENS!

--Mrs. League

As a Superman-fan, I don't usually have much space to ridicule the proclivities of others.

But this Cuddle Party thing? If you're one of the lucky folks attending Cuddle Parties, I'm going to help you out here:

You are lame.

If you're that starved for attention and affection, get a cat. The cat may not even like you, but it will sit on you when it gets cold. Rolling around on the floor with total strangers while you're in your jammies shows only that your mommy did not hold you enough as a child.

Seriously, this is the lamest thing I've ever heard of. It's right up there with Furries.

A special section for the ladies:

The men are lying to you. They do not just want simple platonic affection. This Cuddle Party idea has been concocted by the same team of evil geniuses who taught you it's okay to wear only a sports-bra while jogging, and that the Beach Volleyball team would perform better in bikinis.

Remember that dude from Rain's Cuddle Party two weeks back? He was laying next to you in the Cookie Monster shirt? he was kind of funny and silly, but sort of weird, but it was okay because it's just a cuddle party..?

He's imagining you naked even now.

He is. I'm sorry. All we can do is hope to distract him next time

This time next year, the Cuddle Parties are going to have turned into big Ecstacy-fueled Roman orgies, and all of the people looking to crawl into their jammies and roll around on the floor with complete strangers (while still pretending this is actually sanitary) are going to be wondering what happened.

Get a cat. They're easy to adopt at the ASPCA. They even poop in a box so they're easy to clean up after.

If that fails, try dating.

I don't follow baseball, but holy cow...

I get the feeling I am not going to be able to find the Justice League toy of The UltraHumanite.

Note on the link that this company has ALREADY jacked the price up to $35.00 before shipping.

Leaguers, this is highway robbery. This is $.75 worth of plastic.

IF you see the toy at Target or Wal-Mart, let me know or pick it up, and I will send you a PHAT check. DO NOT spend more than $7.50 on this toy. THe last time I ordered a figure online that way, I saw it on the peg for $6.50 the next week.

Anyway, Ultra-Humanite. White Ape with big brain and bondage gear.

Remember that movie Jim Caviezel was in where his father sent him to humanity to save us from ourselves?

Well, word on the comic book street is that he may be about to be in another movie along those same lines.

Jim Caviezel is now rumored to be cast as Superman for the new Bryan Singer helmed Superman movie due to begin production before the end of 04.

If the rumor is true, I'm okay with it. I'm not as excited as I was about Christian Bale as Batman, but it's a far cry from one-time-Super-selection Ashton Kutcher (shudder). Caviezel is supposed to be an excellent actor (I've never seen any of his movies). He's just... smaller than I was thinking Superman might be. And I'd have liked to have seen the continuity of bringing Tom Welling over from Smallville to Superman. But, c'est la vie. No Kutcher means we're that much closer to the movie not being a complete trainwreck.

You can read here where Mark Millar (irritating but talented writer of Marvel's Ultimates and Spider-Man) drops the bomb.

And sounds like the script includes Brainiac. BRAINIAC!!!! Please, God... Let them use the "Where's-My-Pants?" version of Brainiac. Actually, Brainiac has had so many different looks over the years, I am sure it will be a totally new and interesting version if he is in the movie.

I guess Brainiac 13 is too much to hope for.

Actually, these days, expecting this movie not to stink is too much to hope for. Jim D. called me about two weeks ago apparently just to let me know he didn't think they could ever make a good Superman movie. I suspect he'd just finished Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, which was excellent only in it's inclusion of John Cryer as Luthor's bumbling nephew, Lenny.

More Superheroes in trouble...

Superman is in Minnesota causing trouble, so Batman has also made an appearance in the Mid-West.

I always thought The World's Greatest Detective would avoid the sweets. Mayhaps not.

thanks to Shoemaker for the link.

Sounds like Clark's been getting into the red kryptonite again.

Maxwell locates some unfortunate advertising at the Republican convention.

God knows I love Halloween. I do. I love it. Here at The League, it's up there with Christmas and Arbor Day.

And I am comforted to know it is soon a-coming. How do I know? I just ate a delicious bowl of "Haunted Apple Jacks Manor" with marshmallow bones, skulls, and other little bits. It was frightfully delicious.

Anybody have any ideas for a Halloween contest this year? In order to help out Jim D., I'm a-thinking of a single entry list of "really bad horror movies."

Either that, or something to do with "What shall I carve upon a pumpkin?"

I have to run the contest beginning in about two or three weeks, so I'm taking submissions for ideas.

And it's not too early for you to start planning your costume. This year, I am going to be a chubby white guy. I started working on this costume in 1995. I'm almost done.

So I may or may not have broken Jamie's hand. Ker-whack.

Nothing like injuring the wife to make yourself feel like a total heel.

We were at the gym and I tossed her a medicine ball. According to some reports, I tossed it too quickly or something. I'm not sure. I thought the speed was okay. Maybe she lacks hand-eye coordination. I cannot say. I do know it was I who threw the ball, and she has the injured hand.

I also know that we spent three or four hours at the ER today listening to the lady in the next room get manually cleared of her terrible constipation.

Look, if I had to listen to the whole ordeal, you have to think about it for a few seconds.

Jamie is doing okay. She needs to go for an additional X-Ray later this week, and then she'll know for certain. In the meantime, she's in a sort of cast/ splint and a sling.

And I feel like a jerk.

Luckily, there was my mom on the other end of the phone, lending her undying love and support.

"What did you do that to her for?"
"Mom, I just tossed her the ball."
"Well, you threw it too hard."
"I didn't throw it too hard, Ma. It was a freak accident."
"Why weren't you being more careful?"
"I was being careful. It was an accident."
"It doesn't sound to me like you were being careful."
"I was."
"Well, Jamie can't catch a ball like that. What kind of ball was this?"
"It was a medicine ball."
"I never heard of such a thing. Why were you throwing it at her?"
"Because my trainer told me to. We were like five feet apart."
"It sounds like you weren't being careful."

Sigh.

Anyone remember my self-congratulatory story on my time at The Disney Store?

Well, apparently I'm not the only one who sees the face of evil in the robotic friendliness and efficiency of the Disney Corp.

Heidi reports here from The Beat.

Reading this makes me want to watch Westworld again.

THANKS, SCIENCE!!!!

You know what's amazing but absolutely f**king gross?

Growing a jaw in your back.

It turns out, I am in class with a guy who played Spock's dad in Star Trek V.

How cool is that?

Hi all.

Still busy.

But, here we go anyway...

Comics legend Neil Gaiman has ventured continually into film and television, and is not set to see one of the projects he's worked on actually get wide theatrical release. He's most famous for his Sandman series, and the Death spin-offs.

The new flick appears to be a fantasy movie in the vein of Dark Crystal, Labrynth, Legend or something like that. I honestly have no idea, because all of the pictures look like images done by comic illustrator Dave McKean, a constant Gaiman collaborator. (McKean also worked on Arkham Asylum, I believe).

I don't know if McKean worked on this film, but it sure looks like he did.

The movie is called "MirrorMask". I don't know anything about it, including expected release dates.

Here's a pic

Here's another

another pic

Yet another

I already know my old pal, The My, will be a big fan of this movie. I doubt he knows if it yet, but he will.

There's a new Batman cartoon debuting this Fall.

Looks pretty much like Batman, all right. It doesn't appear to be any improvement over the Batman series from the 90's, but it does look okay. I have no doubt I'll DVR it (it's on Saturday mornings... The League is so very sleepy on Saturday mornings).

My guess is, WB is re-launching the entire Batman franchise with the release of Batman Begins, and they didn't want to pay Bruce Timm and Paul Dini a decent salary, so they started fresh.

Anyway, for a peek at the show, click here. There's a Flash intro and a stream of a sort of trailer for the show and skin for your media player.

You may or may not know this, but The League is involved with Distance Education by profession. I put classes online for the School of Engineering for a large public university.

Well, it's a fairly new field, this online learning. Maybe ten years old.

Anyway, this is the first time I've seen distance learning related humor. I'm a little blown away.

Check out this article in The Onion.

And just a little something if you have a few extra minutes at your desk...

an ad for Robot Insurance from Old Glory Insurance.

...Doesn't pay to get out of bed...

So it's the first week of classes, which means there are a lot of students on campus all of the time, running from building to building, finding classrooms, lounging about, etc...

Which also means there are lots of folks selling crap all around campus. There are the guys selling newspaper subscriptions, and people trying to move credit cards, etc... Last year there were girls in slinky dresses trying to give out samples of a new cologne.

So I just left a meeting and I'm walking on the street parallel to campus (think west side of The Drag) when this dude in the standard "gym-guy" uniform spies me. I see he has a handful of brightly colored flyers, so I steel myself.

"Hey, dude! You want to get the workout of a lifetime?!!! Be in the best shape of your life?!!!"

I give him the one hand "no" motion near my side, and do the curt head-shake. And I go on my way.

"Looks like you could use it!"

And that's when I stopped and turned to look back.

I THINK he was trying to be helpful or something, because he was still standing there with a flier extended out to me.

As always, I was at a loss for words, but I was standing there with the bird fully extended, so I guess I felt pretty good about that.

I just wondered what school of marketing this guy had gone to where you SHAME people into joining your gym. I can only imagine the hang-dog clientele, miserably trudging along on the treadmill.

"You'll never lose weight like that, fatty!"

Anyway, it was a nice, completely unexpected blow to my self-esteem I just didn't need today. And when that's the case, the finger just doesn't suffice.

Happy Birthday R2-D2!

Kenny Baker, the man in the can, is 70 years old today. 70 years old and they're still making him sit in the little robot while he should be out on the golf course. For those of you who think R2-D2 is Kenny's only claim to fame I direct you to item 4 on his IMDB filmography list.

--Mrs. League

This weekend I did what I always do when Jamie leaves. I freaked out, because, kids... The League does not do well when left to his own devices. At least Mel was there to pal around.

All that went sour, though, when Saturday night I took mel for a walk that ended with me getting him to go down a slide at the park near my house.

I also went to Best Buy this weekend, because there are no other video/ CD stores in Chandler for me to support.

On a whim, I picked up the new album by Scissor Sisters, based upon a strong review I read somewhere, and because they were willing to do a disco cover of Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb."

It's an odd record, and is better than you think it is upon a first listen. Scissor Sisters seem to have two modes: Elton John and Disco Frenzy. I have no idea if that appeals to you, but I do like a good 3/5ths to 2/3rds of the record, which is a much better average then I have been hitting of late.

I also picked up Freaks, which was even better than I remember it being.

Gooble Gobble
One of us
One of us

The extra features are as fascinating as the actual movie.

For a nice little tune about Circus Folk by my old pals in Maximum Coherence, go here to listen.

Anyhoo, I am very busy with work. I welcome you all to enjoy this picture, and maybe write a story about it.

Huh.

Will Tom Welling (of Clark Kent/ Smallville fame) appear in the new Batman movie as Clark Kent?

SuperheroHype! thinks so...

I love the idea of a shared Batman/ Superman universe in the movies, and I'd love to see each franchise knock out two movies and then do a World's Finest movie. Batman and Superman shared a comic entitled "World's Finest" for decades. Ever since, when referring to the pairing of Batman and Superman, real comic geeks refer to it as "World's Finest." Just a little FYI.

If you CAN'T wait for a World's Finest movie, check out this fan film...

Also, a picture in the article features the ninja costumes worn by the bad dudes run by Ra's Al Ghul. Notice the Batman-like protrusions from the fore-arm guards. Pretty cool.

See, Ryan, we didn't have to get married at Green Pastures.

"Who gives this woman in marriage?" asked Stacey Garza of the Free Will Church.
"Her friends and family at Wal-Mart," Foruria replied.

When Worlds Collide

okay...

I just watched the last 50-60 seconds of Bill O'Reilly interviewing Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.

My brain is melting.

Man, did anyone else watch the Women's Marathon this morning? That was awesome.

BTW, Deena Kastor came in 3rd, winning the Bronze. She's awesome.