So...
A SUPER invitation from Jim!
Jim D isn't just a somewhat competent attorney, he's also something of a film nerd. Scratch that, Jim is a HUGE film nerd. Why, back in film school, Jim didn't just pay lip service to understanding and enjoying foreign film, he actually showed genuine appreciation for the film of other lands. HA HA HA HA HA HA
Oh, Jim.
In the past year, Jim teamed up with a different pal of his from film school and shot and produced a feature length film. See Pleadings stuff here.
As if that's not enough, Jim is also, apparently, chairman of the film board for the local vintage theater. Pretty crazy. This means Jim gets to chair the group which selects the movies the theater shows during their summer film series (Jim, step in here any time if I'm getting these details incorrect).
As part of his duties, Jim is looking into whether or not he can secure prints of Superman: The Movie and Superman II. So, Jim has asked if I want to join him the sprawling metropolis of Beaumont, Texas for a day or two and be a part of the screening.
Well, Leaguers, it's been about 25 years since I've seen either movie on the big screen, so my heart is a-twitter. That twitter may just be the 35 minutes I just did on the elliptical machine, but I'm pretty sure it's some form of genuine excitement.
With a new Superman movie shooting in March, it's a great chance for the good folks of Beaumont, TX to see the movies which are going to be the basis for the new film (basically, the new film is supposed to pick up where Superman II left off, ignoring Superman III and IV altogether). So, in a way, this a very unqique opportunity for an audience to take in the full cinematic experience just a year before the next film is released.
Apparently Jim has shown his creative side in his chairmanship and tries to set the mood for the film out in the lobby before showtime even begins. For example, before showing Glory, they might have Civil War re-enactors hanging out. Before showing Raging Bull, a shirtless and sweaty Randy will punch you in the face for a dollar.
This is all contingent on Jim securing prints of the two movies, as I will not show up for, say, BlankMan.
Part of me is also trying to figure out how to get a Jor-El costume together before the screening, because Lord knows I am NOT squeezing into any blue unitards, no matter how funny the final effect might be.
So, if this pans out, I welcome EACH AND EVERY LOYAL LEAGUER to join us in Beaumont, Texas for one AMAZING DAY as we screen two great movies. We will, of course, go drinking immediately after the films are over.
More details to come.
Thursday, February 17, 2005
I don't know if anyone else watched Smallville last night, but that episode was pretty funny.
No, they did not end up calling the dog "Krypto" at the end of the episode, despite what Clark wanted to do. Instead, the dog is named "Shelby", which is pretty cool. Jeph Loeb, former Superman writer and current producer on Smallville, had established in the graphic novel "Superman For All Seasons" that Clark had a dog named Shelby when he was in high school. Voila! It all ties together neatly in a way which is pleasing to us comic nerds.
In discussions with The League's brother last night, he mentioned that my entries in these pages are not as lengthy as they once were. I suspect he is right on the nose about that one. At one point, entries were topping three or four pages, and these days, I do seem to keeping it brief.
There are probably several mitigating factors.
a) I have already covered a lot of ground and I only have so many stories which are really fit to print or which are even all that amusing.
b) I am a busy beaver with work, as I once was, but I have come to often feel that my off-work hours can also be spent doing things which don't involve as much in the way of blogging. Last semester, school was a bear. Now, I'm also trying to make time for reading and doing other things which I haven't really been doing a lot of.
c) Sometimes it's tough to get revved up to write some three page essay on the merits of Sid and Marty Krofft. Something will seem like an ingenious idea in the elevator on the way down to the car, and when you sit down with the old laptop to write about it, you got nothing.
d) My audience is weird. I have no idea who visits here on a regular basis, or how often, so the idea of cranking out 3 or 4 pages per day every day seems like it would be less attractive to people who only occasionally pop in. Who needs to get that involved in my personal navel-gazing when it actually takes effort?
e) My topics of discussion are probably edited more than I'd like for them to be. Here at The League, we try to play good host and avoid Sex, Religion and Politics. This isn't just because we're trying to be polite, it's also because The League is not a place for well-thought out discussion on much of anything. If I wanted to play High School Forensics Club, I'd set up a separate site to do so.
I do think there are great forums for debate on these topics, and debating these topics is both intelligent and human. However, The League is neither of these things, and so would rather investigate the mysteries of the useless.
f) I think I'm rambling slightly less and editing out points which repeat. By this I mean, I'm finding things which I already said, and cutting them out. So, when something I already said appears, I can make the appropriate edits.
g) I'll be honest, some days blogging is a bit like howling into the wind. You write a 3-4 page treatise on the wonders of The Banana Splits, and nobody responds. It's sort of the same uncomfortable effect you get when you finish a lengthy statement at the Thanksgiving table regarding the welfare of mankind, there's an awkward pause, and then Aunt Gertie starts talking about how her bunion is keeping her from making it to Plinko night at the Senior Center. After that, you're most likely to keep it a little more on the low-down.
That's really the best explanation I can give you. Everything winds down after a while. I've already kept with this blogging hoo-hah far longer than I ever intended to. While I am not feeling the desire to put the final kaibosh on The League, I think I've more or less pushed the limits of what I'm going to do here, as well as the limits of the patience of the average human for comic-related trivia.
I guess all I can say is that the thing which makes me most inspired to keep involved with The League is reader feedback via e-mail or comments. No comments (in my ego-driven mind) equates to no readers, or at least no interest in what people are reading.
So if you're out there, say hullo from time to time.
And, now, "Superman is a...". Content is office friendly. Title of the website is probably not office friendly, unless your office is more fun than my own.
Tomorrow: Earth-Shattering invitation from Jim D.
No, they did not end up calling the dog "Krypto" at the end of the episode, despite what Clark wanted to do. Instead, the dog is named "Shelby", which is pretty cool. Jeph Loeb, former Superman writer and current producer on Smallville, had established in the graphic novel "Superman For All Seasons" that Clark had a dog named Shelby when he was in high school. Voila! It all ties together neatly in a way which is pleasing to us comic nerds.
In discussions with The League's brother last night, he mentioned that my entries in these pages are not as lengthy as they once were. I suspect he is right on the nose about that one. At one point, entries were topping three or four pages, and these days, I do seem to keeping it brief.
There are probably several mitigating factors.
a) I have already covered a lot of ground and I only have so many stories which are really fit to print or which are even all that amusing.
b) I am a busy beaver with work, as I once was, but I have come to often feel that my off-work hours can also be spent doing things which don't involve as much in the way of blogging. Last semester, school was a bear. Now, I'm also trying to make time for reading and doing other things which I haven't really been doing a lot of.
c) Sometimes it's tough to get revved up to write some three page essay on the merits of Sid and Marty Krofft. Something will seem like an ingenious idea in the elevator on the way down to the car, and when you sit down with the old laptop to write about it, you got nothing.
d) My audience is weird. I have no idea who visits here on a regular basis, or how often, so the idea of cranking out 3 or 4 pages per day every day seems like it would be less attractive to people who only occasionally pop in. Who needs to get that involved in my personal navel-gazing when it actually takes effort?
e) My topics of discussion are probably edited more than I'd like for them to be. Here at The League, we try to play good host and avoid Sex, Religion and Politics. This isn't just because we're trying to be polite, it's also because The League is not a place for well-thought out discussion on much of anything. If I wanted to play High School Forensics Club, I'd set up a separate site to do so.
I do think there are great forums for debate on these topics, and debating these topics is both intelligent and human. However, The League is neither of these things, and so would rather investigate the mysteries of the useless.
f) I think I'm rambling slightly less and editing out points which repeat. By this I mean, I'm finding things which I already said, and cutting them out. So, when something I already said appears, I can make the appropriate edits.
g) I'll be honest, some days blogging is a bit like howling into the wind. You write a 3-4 page treatise on the wonders of The Banana Splits, and nobody responds. It's sort of the same uncomfortable effect you get when you finish a lengthy statement at the Thanksgiving table regarding the welfare of mankind, there's an awkward pause, and then Aunt Gertie starts talking about how her bunion is keeping her from making it to Plinko night at the Senior Center. After that, you're most likely to keep it a little more on the low-down.
That's really the best explanation I can give you. Everything winds down after a while. I've already kept with this blogging hoo-hah far longer than I ever intended to. While I am not feeling the desire to put the final kaibosh on The League, I think I've more or less pushed the limits of what I'm going to do here, as well as the limits of the patience of the average human for comic-related trivia.
I guess all I can say is that the thing which makes me most inspired to keep involved with The League is reader feedback via e-mail or comments. No comments (in my ego-driven mind) equates to no readers, or at least no interest in what people are reading.
So if you're out there, say hullo from time to time.
And, now, "Superman is a...". Content is office friendly. Title of the website is probably not office friendly, unless your office is more fun than my own.
Tomorrow: Earth-Shattering invitation from Jim D.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Bit and Pieces:
Good dog.
And, hey... Right on.
Also, the Minnesota Vikings were just purchased by a dude from right here in Chandler, AZ. Apparently there's a really rich guy named reggie living right here in my own backyard.
Reed, I hope you like the idea of cheering for the Chandler Vikings.
Good dog.
And, hey... Right on.
Also, the Minnesota Vikings were just purchased by a dude from right here in Chandler, AZ. Apparently there's a really rich guy named reggie living right here in my own backyard.
Reed, I hope you like the idea of cheering for the Chandler Vikings.
Oy.
I went to the doctor today. I'm not sick, but I switched insurance this year and I decided to start seeing Jamie's doctor since he seems like a non-quack.
Anyhoo, I mostly talked to his PA or NP or whatever, and then Dr. Chang came in, looked me square in the eye and said, "You need to eat less and exercise everyday. But I am not telling you anything you don't already know."
So, it's back to the gym for Ryan as we try to keep the Grim Reaper from coming to collect for a while longer yet.
I have a few wishes regarding death.
1) I don't want to die in some embarassing way. Depending on what you read, Elvis died after a particularly hearty BM. His girlfriend found him face down on the bathroom rug, pants around his ankles. I'd like to avoid this scene for both my sake, and that of Jamie and the funeral workers.
2) I'd like for my death to be a complete surprise. For example, I'll take a piano falling from a tenth story window and squishing me, but I'd prefer just not to know the big one is coming. WHAMMO and over with. Especially if it's a wacky sudden death such as a falling piano. That'd be great.
3) I don't want to outlive everyone I know. That's just way too Omega Man for my tastes. However, if everyone turns into zombies, I'm going to stick around, because then you've still sort of got company and I always wanted to see the final fate of humanity.
4) I'd prefer not to die in front of children. I just wouldn't feel very good about scarring some little kid for life.
5) If I can't have a surprise death, I hope I don't go down without a fight. I'm not talking about fighting some disease, because that's obvious. I mean I hope I'm old, senile and not afraid to take out an orderly or two before I go down.
6) I hope I can take Jason with me.
7) I'd like a Viking Funeral on Town Lake. Load me up with all my earthly possessions, float me past the bridge and then light me up. Also, I'd like for someone to play Ozzy Osbourne's "Crazy Train" as I go up.
I don't think any of this is too much to ask for. You have to think about these things in advance or you're never going to be prepared when your number is up.
I went to the doctor today. I'm not sick, but I switched insurance this year and I decided to start seeing Jamie's doctor since he seems like a non-quack.
Anyhoo, I mostly talked to his PA or NP or whatever, and then Dr. Chang came in, looked me square in the eye and said, "You need to eat less and exercise everyday. But I am not telling you anything you don't already know."
So, it's back to the gym for Ryan as we try to keep the Grim Reaper from coming to collect for a while longer yet.
I have a few wishes regarding death.
1) I don't want to die in some embarassing way. Depending on what you read, Elvis died after a particularly hearty BM. His girlfriend found him face down on the bathroom rug, pants around his ankles. I'd like to avoid this scene for both my sake, and that of Jamie and the funeral workers.
2) I'd like for my death to be a complete surprise. For example, I'll take a piano falling from a tenth story window and squishing me, but I'd prefer just not to know the big one is coming. WHAMMO and over with. Especially if it's a wacky sudden death such as a falling piano. That'd be great.
3) I don't want to outlive everyone I know. That's just way too Omega Man for my tastes. However, if everyone turns into zombies, I'm going to stick around, because then you've still sort of got company and I always wanted to see the final fate of humanity.
4) I'd prefer not to die in front of children. I just wouldn't feel very good about scarring some little kid for life.
5) If I can't have a surprise death, I hope I don't go down without a fight. I'm not talking about fighting some disease, because that's obvious. I mean I hope I'm old, senile and not afraid to take out an orderly or two before I go down.
6) I hope I can take Jason with me.
7) I'd like a Viking Funeral on Town Lake. Load me up with all my earthly possessions, float me past the bridge and then light me up. Also, I'd like for someone to play Ozzy Osbourne's "Crazy Train" as I go up.
I don't think any of this is too much to ask for. You have to think about these things in advance or you're never going to be prepared when your number is up.
Monday, February 14, 2005
A Eulogy for Ninja-Boy
Friend, Conversation Piece, Goldfish
Ninja-Boy, goldfish of the Amazing Steanso, was found floating, pectorals up, this morning. I have decided to eulogize Ninja-Boy in the way most befitting. By quoting Spock's Eulogy by Kirk from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.
We are assembled here today to pay final respects to our honored dead.
And yet, it should be noted, that in the midst of our sorrow, this death takes place in the shadow of new life, the sunrise of a new world, a world that our beloved comrade gave his life to protect and nourish. He did not feel this sacrifice a vain or an empty one, and we will not debate his profound wisdom at these proceedings. Of my friend, I can only say this...
Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most -
human.
GODSPEED, NINJA BOY.
Friend, Conversation Piece, Goldfish
Ninja-Boy, goldfish of the Amazing Steanso, was found floating, pectorals up, this morning. I have decided to eulogize Ninja-Boy in the way most befitting. By quoting Spock's Eulogy by Kirk from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.
We are assembled here today to pay final respects to our honored dead.
And yet, it should be noted, that in the midst of our sorrow, this death takes place in the shadow of new life, the sunrise of a new world, a world that our beloved comrade gave his life to protect and nourish. He did not feel this sacrifice a vain or an empty one, and we will not debate his profound wisdom at these proceedings. Of my friend, I can only say this...
Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most -
human.
GODSPEED, NINJA BOY.
Mrs. League here.
In honor of Valentine's Day, I urge you to not allow your loved ones to eat this. The Hamdog.
Leaguers, this is the most disgusting item of 'food' I have ever seen. A brief description:
"a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries"
Bleargh.
I would also like to wish the League a Happy Valentine's Day. He is truly the bestest husband in the world! Thanks for a wonderful Valentine's Day weekend!
In honor of Valentine's Day, I urge you to not allow your loved ones to eat this. The Hamdog.
Leaguers, this is the most disgusting item of 'food' I have ever seen. A brief description:
"a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries"
Bleargh.
I would also like to wish the League a Happy Valentine's Day. He is truly the bestest husband in the world! Thanks for a wonderful Valentine's Day weekend!
Happy Valentine's Day, Leaguers!
Jamie and I sort of already had Valentine's Day over the weekend. Sorry, Jamie. No big surprises today.
We went and saw the travelling show of The Lion King, which was much better than you would think it would be. After the fiasco we had going to the theater last time, I was feeling a bit nervous about going to the show once again, but it all panned out just fine. Leaguers, it's the circle of life, and it moves us all.
Jamie and I will probably stay in and eat sandwiches for Valentine's Day dinner. I'm not sure if that's romantic, but that's what I've got planned.
If you want to read up on what Valentine's Day is (aside from one of very few holidays that involves both the name of a Saint and occassionally the exchanging of saucy underwear), you can check out the History Channel's web-site here.
A scene from the early stages of Mr. and Mrs. League's relationship.
Jamie and I sort of already had Valentine's Day over the weekend. Sorry, Jamie. No big surprises today.
We went and saw the travelling show of The Lion King, which was much better than you would think it would be. After the fiasco we had going to the theater last time, I was feeling a bit nervous about going to the show once again, but it all panned out just fine. Leaguers, it's the circle of life, and it moves us all.
Jamie and I will probably stay in and eat sandwiches for Valentine's Day dinner. I'm not sure if that's romantic, but that's what I've got planned.
If you want to read up on what Valentine's Day is (aside from one of very few holidays that involves both the name of a Saint and occassionally the exchanging of saucy underwear), you can check out the History Channel's web-site here.
A scene from the early stages of Mr. and Mrs. League's relationship.
Sunday, February 13, 2005
It's Krypto week here at The League.
Who is Krypto?
Back in the Silver Age of comics, the editors at DC Comics did not want the worlds of their characters growing boring. So, legend has it, the editors literally asked their young children and nieces and nephews for ideas from time to time. They'd ask, "So, you read these Superman comics I leave about. What would it be neat if Superman could do?"
The legend goes on to say that the kids eventually decided it would be neat if Superboy could have a dog of his own. See, Leaguers, you may think the WB's Smallville was the only place we've ever seen Clark Kent come into his own, but for years and years, Superboy had his own comic series (Adventure Comics) in which he saved the citizens of Smallville from various menaces.
So it came to pass that the readers learned that Superboy's father, Jor-El, was no chump. He had not sent his son off into space in an untested rocket. In fact, Jor-El had built a test rocket and launched it into space, manned with the family dog. Sort of a Laika from Krypton deal.
Anyhoo, Krypto's rocket was knocked off-course, but did, eventually, find its way to earth some time after Clark Kent had put on his long johns and taken to patrolling the greater Smallville metroplex from 2000 feet.
Post-Crisis, Krypto disappeared from DC Comics, written off as too silly or too outlandish for comics which are supposed to take themselves seriously. But you can't keep a good dog down, and when Jeph Loeb got involved with Superman comics around 2000, he wanted to bring back Krypto (along with a lot of Superman's Silver-Age Sci-Fi kookiness).
And while it drove some comics fans INSANE that Superman would once again have a super-powered dog, Loeb reintroduced Krypto. Why does Krypto drive comic nerds nuts? A lot of comic fans somehow perceive their favorite art form isn't taken seriously, and believe this will change if folks understand that they only read comics about kick-ass guys like, say, Wolverine or The Punisher, or other characters who stab people a lot. Flying dogs with heat vision don't fall into that picture terribly well.
But some readers really enjoyed Krypto, and a lot of folks working in Hollywood also still like the idea.
And so, Krypto is coming to television in two new forms!
On March 25th (a day which is important for some other reason, but I cannot recall why...) Krypto is coming to Cartoon Network as part of a new all-Krypto animated series. From these publicity pictures, it appears Ace The Bat-Hound is also joining the club.
Reuniting Superboy with Superdog, Smallville on the WB! is featuring an episode this Wednesday entitled "Krypto". Not exactly sure what the episode is about, but here's a picture of a guest-star.
Who is Krypto?
Back in the Silver Age of comics, the editors at DC Comics did not want the worlds of their characters growing boring. So, legend has it, the editors literally asked their young children and nieces and nephews for ideas from time to time. They'd ask, "So, you read these Superman comics I leave about. What would it be neat if Superman could do?"
The legend goes on to say that the kids eventually decided it would be neat if Superboy could have a dog of his own. See, Leaguers, you may think the WB's Smallville was the only place we've ever seen Clark Kent come into his own, but for years and years, Superboy had his own comic series (Adventure Comics) in which he saved the citizens of Smallville from various menaces.
So it came to pass that the readers learned that Superboy's father, Jor-El, was no chump. He had not sent his son off into space in an untested rocket. In fact, Jor-El had built a test rocket and launched it into space, manned with the family dog. Sort of a Laika from Krypton deal.
Anyhoo, Krypto's rocket was knocked off-course, but did, eventually, find its way to earth some time after Clark Kent had put on his long johns and taken to patrolling the greater Smallville metroplex from 2000 feet.
Post-Crisis, Krypto disappeared from DC Comics, written off as too silly or too outlandish for comics which are supposed to take themselves seriously. But you can't keep a good dog down, and when Jeph Loeb got involved with Superman comics around 2000, he wanted to bring back Krypto (along with a lot of Superman's Silver-Age Sci-Fi kookiness).
And while it drove some comics fans INSANE that Superman would once again have a super-powered dog, Loeb reintroduced Krypto. Why does Krypto drive comic nerds nuts? A lot of comic fans somehow perceive their favorite art form isn't taken seriously, and believe this will change if folks understand that they only read comics about kick-ass guys like, say, Wolverine or The Punisher, or other characters who stab people a lot. Flying dogs with heat vision don't fall into that picture terribly well.
But some readers really enjoyed Krypto, and a lot of folks working in Hollywood also still like the idea.
And so, Krypto is coming to television in two new forms!
On March 25th (a day which is important for some other reason, but I cannot recall why...) Krypto is coming to Cartoon Network as part of a new all-Krypto animated series. From these publicity pictures, it appears Ace The Bat-Hound is also joining the club.
Reuniting Superboy with Superdog, Smallville on the WB! is featuring an episode this Wednesday entitled "Krypto". Not exactly sure what the episode is about, but here's a picture of a guest-star.
Friday, February 11, 2005
Like everyone else, film majors like to lie about on sunny days casting imaginary movies. Years ago on just such a day, The League's film school pal, Justin L, suggested Seinfeld co-creator Larry David for a Spider-Man film. As whom?
Why, The Vulture, of course.
Could Justin L.'s prophecy be coming true?
Why, The Vulture, of course.
Could Justin L.'s prophecy be coming true?
Thursday, February 10, 2005
It's that time again kids (because we've got a lot of territory to cover)...
It's time for...
DAMES IN THE MEDIA THE LEAGUE ONCE DUG
Instead of trying to do this in chronological order, I'm going to stick with a mystery theme to be revealed later (see if you can figure it out!).
This time around, The League investigates Knight Rider phenom Bonnie Barstow as portrayed by Patricia McPherson.
The lovely Patricia McPherson as Bonnie Barstow, world's greatest Jiffy-Lube employee.
Bonnie came into my life a few years on from Wonder Woman, when, I believe, I was maturing quite nicely in my taste in Dames. No longer did twirling seem to be such an attractive trait in a woman. Well, it was still important, but not as important.
So what did Bonnie have?
1) Bonnie didn't fall for Michael's nonsense. Sure, I loved Knight Rider, too, but I always thought Michael was sort of creepy. He showed more chest hair than I wanted to look at as an eight year old boy, and he usually spent the duration of most shows making goo-goo eyes at the dame of the week. And he was nice enough to Bonnie, and maybe a little flirty, but a) she didn't have badly frosted early 80's hair so Michael would never take her seriously, anyway, and b) she wasn't interested in his nonsense. You never once saw Bonnie show the slightest interest in Michael. No interest in creepy guy? Already I could feel the pitter-patter of my heart.
2) Hey, I was eight. I could not have cared less about Michael Knight's trials and tribulations. In fact, if the show had been about KITT and Dom DeLuise, I would have tuned in week after week just the same. For me, Knight Rider was about the Knight Industries Two-Thousand. And who was the genius behing K.I.T.T.? Bonnie Barstow.
Bonnie has trouble installing KITT's new 8-track.
Yes sir, Michael was just some jack-ass the Knight Foundation sent out there so draw fire away from their billion dollar, AI-infused car. Also, it would have been deeply suspicious if K.I.T.T. were zipping around southern California with no "driver" at the wheel. At the end of the day, those of us who knew the score knew that the Knight Foundation might as well have put a circus monkey in the cabin for all the good Michael did.
But, who had the brains and know-how to keep that car running? Surely not Michael (who was shot in the head in the pilot, as I recall). Nah, It was Bonnie who kept that show running. She was technically inclined and liked to chat it up with the talking car. My kind of lady.
Bonnie chats it up with KITT while replacing the windshield wiper-fluid.
3) They tried to replace Bonnie, and it didn't take. It's totally true. In the 1983-84 season, Bonnie wasn't on the show. I'm not sure why Bonnie bailed on KITT, or why Patricia McPherson wasn't on, but they brought in this sort of blonde woman to try to fill in for Bonnie. Rebecca Holden played fake -Bonnie April Curtis, but April just couldn't fill Bonnie's jumpsuit, and so, the next season, Bonnie triumphantly returned.
The evil, fake Bonnie, April Curtis, whose hair is a magnificent feat of architecture.
4) Bonnie apparently lived in the back of a semi, sort of like the truck in SpyHunter. Not only that, but she lived in the back of a semi which was constantly rolling, always nearby when needed, had every part conceivable to help fix KITT, and was always well-lit and spotlessly clean.
This is not to mention that the interior of the semi seemed to defy the laws of time and space, appearing to be much, much larger inside than outside.
One was, of course, left to wonder if the semi had a driver who had never taken a bathroom break, or if KITT's idiot cousin was up there muttering to himself.
5) No matter what, Bonnie's white jumpsuit always appeared spotless.
Sure, Bonnie had a lot of traits I didn't have at age 8. For example, had I had a white jump suit, it would have had Cheet-o finger stains down the front. But Bonnie was more than just another Jodie from The Fall Guy. Bonnie wasn't just eye-candy, she was also a mechanic and she was smarter than the rest of the morons on that show combined.
So a salute to Bonnie Barstow, finest TV mechanic to ever grace a white jumpsuit.
To read MORE about Bonnie, go here.
Go here to read up on Wonder Woman.
It's time for...
DAMES IN THE MEDIA THE LEAGUE ONCE DUG
Instead of trying to do this in chronological order, I'm going to stick with a mystery theme to be revealed later (see if you can figure it out!).
This time around, The League investigates Knight Rider phenom Bonnie Barstow as portrayed by Patricia McPherson.
The lovely Patricia McPherson as Bonnie Barstow, world's greatest Jiffy-Lube employee.
Bonnie came into my life a few years on from Wonder Woman, when, I believe, I was maturing quite nicely in my taste in Dames. No longer did twirling seem to be such an attractive trait in a woman. Well, it was still important, but not as important.
So what did Bonnie have?
1) Bonnie didn't fall for Michael's nonsense. Sure, I loved Knight Rider, too, but I always thought Michael was sort of creepy. He showed more chest hair than I wanted to look at as an eight year old boy, and he usually spent the duration of most shows making goo-goo eyes at the dame of the week. And he was nice enough to Bonnie, and maybe a little flirty, but a) she didn't have badly frosted early 80's hair so Michael would never take her seriously, anyway, and b) she wasn't interested in his nonsense. You never once saw Bonnie show the slightest interest in Michael. No interest in creepy guy? Already I could feel the pitter-patter of my heart.
2) Hey, I was eight. I could not have cared less about Michael Knight's trials and tribulations. In fact, if the show had been about KITT and Dom DeLuise, I would have tuned in week after week just the same. For me, Knight Rider was about the Knight Industries Two-Thousand. And who was the genius behing K.I.T.T.? Bonnie Barstow.
Bonnie has trouble installing KITT's new 8-track.
Yes sir, Michael was just some jack-ass the Knight Foundation sent out there so draw fire away from their billion dollar, AI-infused car. Also, it would have been deeply suspicious if K.I.T.T. were zipping around southern California with no "driver" at the wheel. At the end of the day, those of us who knew the score knew that the Knight Foundation might as well have put a circus monkey in the cabin for all the good Michael did.
But, who had the brains and know-how to keep that car running? Surely not Michael (who was shot in the head in the pilot, as I recall). Nah, It was Bonnie who kept that show running. She was technically inclined and liked to chat it up with the talking car. My kind of lady.
Bonnie chats it up with KITT while replacing the windshield wiper-fluid.
3) They tried to replace Bonnie, and it didn't take. It's totally true. In the 1983-84 season, Bonnie wasn't on the show. I'm not sure why Bonnie bailed on KITT, or why Patricia McPherson wasn't on, but they brought in this sort of blonde woman to try to fill in for Bonnie. Rebecca Holden played fake -Bonnie April Curtis, but April just couldn't fill Bonnie's jumpsuit, and so, the next season, Bonnie triumphantly returned.
The evil, fake Bonnie, April Curtis, whose hair is a magnificent feat of architecture.
4) Bonnie apparently lived in the back of a semi, sort of like the truck in SpyHunter. Not only that, but she lived in the back of a semi which was constantly rolling, always nearby when needed, had every part conceivable to help fix KITT, and was always well-lit and spotlessly clean.
This is not to mention that the interior of the semi seemed to defy the laws of time and space, appearing to be much, much larger inside than outside.
One was, of course, left to wonder if the semi had a driver who had never taken a bathroom break, or if KITT's idiot cousin was up there muttering to himself.
5) No matter what, Bonnie's white jumpsuit always appeared spotless.
Sure, Bonnie had a lot of traits I didn't have at age 8. For example, had I had a white jump suit, it would have had Cheet-o finger stains down the front. But Bonnie was more than just another Jodie from The Fall Guy. Bonnie wasn't just eye-candy, she was also a mechanic and she was smarter than the rest of the morons on that show combined.
So a salute to Bonnie Barstow, finest TV mechanic to ever grace a white jumpsuit.
To read MORE about Bonnie, go here.
Go here to read up on Wonder Woman.
Y'know... sometimes I miss the cold, steely threat of mutually assured destruction which we enjoyed during the days of my youth. You sort of thought the USSR was probably puffing its feathers as much as the US (after all, nobody really benefits when the world ends up a smoking cinder looping around El Sol), and it gave us a big, spectral enemy to dislike. AND the Cold War also provided us with some neat movies.
I need to rent Firefox again.
Sadly, I haven't really had that "We're all doomed" feeling since I was 14 and Gorby made all nice with the west and the wall came down.
But, hey, Armageddon is not something which likes to lay still, and it's making a come-back in all new, wackier format.
Here and here coupled with here, here and here.
I only hope our movie producers are up to the task. Sadly, the German accent sported so often by the villains in Cold War flicks will be sadly inappropriate this time around.
So, make peace with your gods, mortals. I'm getting my lawn chair and bag of Stay Puffed Marshmallows ready.
I need to rent Firefox again.
Sadly, I haven't really had that "We're all doomed" feeling since I was 14 and Gorby made all nice with the west and the wall came down.
But, hey, Armageddon is not something which likes to lay still, and it's making a come-back in all new, wackier format.
Here and here coupled with here, here and here.
I only hope our movie producers are up to the task. Sadly, the German accent sported so often by the villains in Cold War flicks will be sadly inappropriate this time around.
So, make peace with your gods, mortals. I'm getting my lawn chair and bag of Stay Puffed Marshmallows ready.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
That does it. I'm fashioning a series of 'US governor' carrots and retiring. Can someone send me a profile shot of Janet Napolitano? -- Mrs. League
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
So the doorbell rang surprisingly late this evening, probably around 7:45. I was watching American Idol, an episode in which contestants were being weeded out of the 200 who had been selected out of the hundreds of thousands who had auditioned.
"It's amazing," one of us had remarked. "These guys audition and they all really think they're going to be the finalist."
And later, when the lady who had sold her wedding ring to make it to the first set of auditions was told she was not going to go on... and she broke down and said something along the lines of "I guess I'm going to have to find something else to do..." and you couldn't help but feel bad, but at the same time... American Idol dominates television. It reigns supreme as the purest of signs of the image conscious, semi-talented bland vanilla of popular culture. Mostly, the show spotlights those aspiring to be popular entertainers for 9-14 year-olds, but mostly wanting to be as ubiquitous as Colgate. I don't think there are many people over the age of 25 buying the albums by the likes of Clay Aiken and Kelly Clarkson, but I might be wrong. These are people who have fashioned themselves into approximations of entertainers, without the staff available day and night to ensure they are constantly in the right pants and jacket. Something for nothing.
But this is the dream, and it's what American Idol holds out for the contestants before pushing them back, teary eyed and invariably embarrassed, back into the world of Wal-Marts and Papa Johns.
I got up and got the door.
This skinny little kid with a large guy was standing on the other side of the security door, and immediately, the kid launched into his prepared lines.
"Hello, sir. I am working with the (blank blank) youth sponsorship group. I am selling newspapers in order to raise funds for savings bonds for college, and to win points towards a trip to Magic Mountain."
Immediately the larger guy cut in.
"We're working with the (blank blank) organization, and we're selling the weekend edition of the East Valley Tribune. A lot of kids don't have a lot of guidance in their life..."
I nodded, caught the basic gist of what they were selling and why, asked how much, and went and got my check book. 1) I don't get the paper currently, and 2) I'm a sucker for kids pretending to save for college. Plus, the kid might go to Magic Mountain. I want to go to Magic Mountain, but if I can't go, someone should.
"Twenty bucks?" I said to the kid.
"Yeah," said the guy. "You play football?"
"No. A little basketball in high school. A little lacrosse."
"Yeah, you look like you played football."
"Ha. No."
"I played five seasons with the Cardinals."
I sort of blinked. Totally embarrassed and not wanting to ask him his name at all, because, honestly, I've never even watched my hometown team on TV. I've listened to them on the radio, but... No. I wasn't going to know who this guy was.
"Yeah, I'm not playing now, so I got involved with helping kids, doing stuff like this."
"Hey, that's great."
"Yeah, last year was really rough. I was going through a divorce, and I was riding my motorcycle and it spun out and I hurt my shoulder and so I'm not playing."
And, I didn't say, Dennis Green cleared house the day he got here. Not even bad players. He just started firing people.
Christ.
I was reminded of the time I was buying plane tickets from this lady from Southwest Airlines, sometime just before Christmas. She told me as I was thanking her that I was her last customer. "Before the Holiday?" "No. After this call I go home and they close the office. They're closing this office permanently tonight." "Before Christmas?" "Yeah."
Christ.
"But I'm going to get back into it," he said. "I had a shoulder surgery and I'm going to get back out there and play again."
He could. He was maybe pushing 30. He was big, but lean. He looked like a player.
"For Arizona?"
"No. Up north."
"Yeah?"
"I'm thinking Green Bay."
"Interesting year for them next year."
"I know Brett Favre," he was used to pulling this one out. It impressed the hell out of people. I love Brett Favre. He's my favorite quarterback. Whether I liked it or not, I was impressed as hell. Unsolicited, the guy went through his history with Brett and I nodded a lot.
And then he finished, and I said something vaguely supportive and impressed.
"I've had three knee surgeries, two shoulder surgeries and probably'll have back surgery before I can go back out there. But I'm training every day."
"You can get back out there for a few more years," I said, and I knew it sounded pretty lame.
"In the meantime I'm working with these kids, and I'm trying to help give them direction I never had."
And this guy, he wasn't like these kids on this show, jumping up and getting 15 minutes on AI, squawking out a few bars and trying to look good. He'd already been where he was going to go, and now he's standing on some guy's front porch spilling his guts, because maybe if he tells enough people and he believes it enough, maybe he's going to be back out there on the field again next season. The divorce and motorcycle accident will be behind him, and he can proudly talk about how he took time off helping kids, getting his head together. And when he's done, he can say he played with the great Brett Favre in his final season, and that all of this, being down with the rest of us fans, maybe that'll have been just a bump in the road.
So, you know, next fall I'll be looking for the guy in the pictures of the line-up of Green Bay.
"It's amazing," one of us had remarked. "These guys audition and they all really think they're going to be the finalist."
And later, when the lady who had sold her wedding ring to make it to the first set of auditions was told she was not going to go on... and she broke down and said something along the lines of "I guess I'm going to have to find something else to do..." and you couldn't help but feel bad, but at the same time... American Idol dominates television. It reigns supreme as the purest of signs of the image conscious, semi-talented bland vanilla of popular culture. Mostly, the show spotlights those aspiring to be popular entertainers for 9-14 year-olds, but mostly wanting to be as ubiquitous as Colgate. I don't think there are many people over the age of 25 buying the albums by the likes of Clay Aiken and Kelly Clarkson, but I might be wrong. These are people who have fashioned themselves into approximations of entertainers, without the staff available day and night to ensure they are constantly in the right pants and jacket. Something for nothing.
But this is the dream, and it's what American Idol holds out for the contestants before pushing them back, teary eyed and invariably embarrassed, back into the world of Wal-Marts and Papa Johns.
I got up and got the door.
This skinny little kid with a large guy was standing on the other side of the security door, and immediately, the kid launched into his prepared lines.
"Hello, sir. I am working with the (blank blank) youth sponsorship group. I am selling newspapers in order to raise funds for savings bonds for college, and to win points towards a trip to Magic Mountain."
Immediately the larger guy cut in.
"We're working with the (blank blank) organization, and we're selling the weekend edition of the East Valley Tribune. A lot of kids don't have a lot of guidance in their life..."
I nodded, caught the basic gist of what they were selling and why, asked how much, and went and got my check book. 1) I don't get the paper currently, and 2) I'm a sucker for kids pretending to save for college. Plus, the kid might go to Magic Mountain. I want to go to Magic Mountain, but if I can't go, someone should.
"Twenty bucks?" I said to the kid.
"Yeah," said the guy. "You play football?"
"No. A little basketball in high school. A little lacrosse."
"Yeah, you look like you played football."
"Ha. No."
"I played five seasons with the Cardinals."
I sort of blinked. Totally embarrassed and not wanting to ask him his name at all, because, honestly, I've never even watched my hometown team on TV. I've listened to them on the radio, but... No. I wasn't going to know who this guy was.
"Yeah, I'm not playing now, so I got involved with helping kids, doing stuff like this."
"Hey, that's great."
"Yeah, last year was really rough. I was going through a divorce, and I was riding my motorcycle and it spun out and I hurt my shoulder and so I'm not playing."
And, I didn't say, Dennis Green cleared house the day he got here. Not even bad players. He just started firing people.
Christ.
I was reminded of the time I was buying plane tickets from this lady from Southwest Airlines, sometime just before Christmas. She told me as I was thanking her that I was her last customer. "Before the Holiday?" "No. After this call I go home and they close the office. They're closing this office permanently tonight." "Before Christmas?" "Yeah."
Christ.
"But I'm going to get back into it," he said. "I had a shoulder surgery and I'm going to get back out there and play again."
He could. He was maybe pushing 30. He was big, but lean. He looked like a player.
"For Arizona?"
"No. Up north."
"Yeah?"
"I'm thinking Green Bay."
"Interesting year for them next year."
"I know Brett Favre," he was used to pulling this one out. It impressed the hell out of people. I love Brett Favre. He's my favorite quarterback. Whether I liked it or not, I was impressed as hell. Unsolicited, the guy went through his history with Brett and I nodded a lot.
And then he finished, and I said something vaguely supportive and impressed.
"I've had three knee surgeries, two shoulder surgeries and probably'll have back surgery before I can go back out there. But I'm training every day."
"You can get back out there for a few more years," I said, and I knew it sounded pretty lame.
"In the meantime I'm working with these kids, and I'm trying to help give them direction I never had."
And this guy, he wasn't like these kids on this show, jumping up and getting 15 minutes on AI, squawking out a few bars and trying to look good. He'd already been where he was going to go, and now he's standing on some guy's front porch spilling his guts, because maybe if he tells enough people and he believes it enough, maybe he's going to be back out there on the field again next season. The divorce and motorcycle accident will be behind him, and he can proudly talk about how he took time off helping kids, getting his head together. And when he's done, he can say he played with the great Brett Favre in his final season, and that all of this, being down with the rest of us fans, maybe that'll have been just a bump in the road.
So, you know, next fall I'll be looking for the guy in the pictures of the line-up of Green Bay.
Several interesting casting choices, the latest of which is here. Looks like the dude who played Kumar of Harold and Kumar go to White Castle is in the new Superman movie.
But as who? Doesn't say, but it sounds like he might be Pete Ross. Or, maybe Steel? Or Krypto? Or, maybe, some made-up guy. I'm hoping he's in a white doggy costume paying Krypto, but I'm cool like that.
Remember that good looking dame from North By Northwest? What ever happened to her? Eva Marie Saint is going to be Ma Kent. Seriously.
Kevin Spacey is Luthor. That dude from House, MD is Perry White. Sam Huntington from one movie or another is Jimmy Olsen. And Cyclops from X-Men is scheduled to play John Jameson... whoops. I mean, Perry White's kid. Who, I believe, croaked in the comics.
But rumors are swirling that the story involves Brainiac (which I applaud) teaming up with Luthor. So who is playing Brainiac?
While I vote for RHPT, I am not sure Randy would choose to wear the awesome costume.
There are various versions of Brainiac floating around in the Superman comics... but I am betting we get some mix of time-travelling Brainac 13 and Brainiac from JLU. Other versions just won't translate well to the big screen.
But as who? Doesn't say, but it sounds like he might be Pete Ross. Or, maybe Steel? Or Krypto? Or, maybe, some made-up guy. I'm hoping he's in a white doggy costume paying Krypto, but I'm cool like that.
Remember that good looking dame from North By Northwest? What ever happened to her? Eva Marie Saint is going to be Ma Kent. Seriously.
Kevin Spacey is Luthor. That dude from House, MD is Perry White. Sam Huntington from one movie or another is Jimmy Olsen. And Cyclops from X-Men is scheduled to play John Jameson... whoops. I mean, Perry White's kid. Who, I believe, croaked in the comics.
But rumors are swirling that the story involves Brainiac (which I applaud) teaming up with Luthor. So who is playing Brainiac?
While I vote for RHPT, I am not sure Randy would choose to wear the awesome costume.
There are various versions of Brainiac floating around in the Superman comics... but I am betting we get some mix of time-travelling Brainac 13 and Brainiac from JLU. Other versions just won't translate well to the big screen.
Not sure exactly what Warner Bros. Studios and DC Comics are up to...
As I was telling Randy the other day via e-mail, I really do try not to dwell too much on the business side of the comic book business. But, for the sake of clarity, it helps to know that DC Comics is owned by Mega-Monopoly AOL Time Warner. Specifically, DC Comics is not in the Warner Books section of the company, as you would suspect, but rather, DC Comics is part of the movie studio wing of the company.
What I'm not clear on is if this wing also includes the television networks which AOL Time Warner owns. These networks include the obvious WB network as well as Cartoon Network, Boomerang and a few others I am probably totally unaware of. But at one point, it also basically owned NBC's butt as the WB was responsible for much of NBC's line-up (Friends, Seinfeld, ER, and.. uh... Suddenly Susan).
So, Marvel Comics, which is publicly traded and is more or less it's own beast, has been pumping out a string of movies beginnign with Blade, now in it's unfortunate 3rd installment. Spider-Man made a truck load of dough, the sequel did likewise... X-Men and X-men United did well, so it seems like people are willing to drop a few clams to check out superheroes at the theater. Although, honestly, I think the soon-to-be-filmed Nic Cage Ghost Rider movie may change all of that.
So, where are the DC movies?
They're coming.
WB has had the brands out there to some extent. We know Smallville has been out there touting a pre-cape Superman for 3.5 seasons. And Justice League (now JLU) has been selling some of the major players for several years.
Batman Begins (the Bat-film for this summer) is now being edited, Superman is scheduled to begin shooting in very short order (in March, I think), A Flash movie is being scripted, Green lantern rumors abound, and... get this Buffy-geeks, Joss Whedon may be directing a Wonder Woman movie.
As Marvel's movies are already losing steam (the trailer for FF looks pretty bland to me, anyway) DC may be ready to assemble the JLA for the big screen. It's a pipe-dream, but dammit, I'm going with it.
While you chew on that, here's a story on a possible Wonder Woman movie, with a link to the actress most recently suggested for the starring role.
As I was telling Randy the other day via e-mail, I really do try not to dwell too much on the business side of the comic book business. But, for the sake of clarity, it helps to know that DC Comics is owned by Mega-Monopoly AOL Time Warner. Specifically, DC Comics is not in the Warner Books section of the company, as you would suspect, but rather, DC Comics is part of the movie studio wing of the company.
What I'm not clear on is if this wing also includes the television networks which AOL Time Warner owns. These networks include the obvious WB network as well as Cartoon Network, Boomerang and a few others I am probably totally unaware of. But at one point, it also basically owned NBC's butt as the WB was responsible for much of NBC's line-up (Friends, Seinfeld, ER, and.. uh... Suddenly Susan).
So, Marvel Comics, which is publicly traded and is more or less it's own beast, has been pumping out a string of movies beginnign with Blade, now in it's unfortunate 3rd installment. Spider-Man made a truck load of dough, the sequel did likewise... X-Men and X-men United did well, so it seems like people are willing to drop a few clams to check out superheroes at the theater. Although, honestly, I think the soon-to-be-filmed Nic Cage Ghost Rider movie may change all of that.
So, where are the DC movies?
They're coming.
WB has had the brands out there to some extent. We know Smallville has been out there touting a pre-cape Superman for 3.5 seasons. And Justice League (now JLU) has been selling some of the major players for several years.
Batman Begins (the Bat-film for this summer) is now being edited, Superman is scheduled to begin shooting in very short order (in March, I think), A Flash movie is being scripted, Green lantern rumors abound, and... get this Buffy-geeks, Joss Whedon may be directing a Wonder Woman movie.
As Marvel's movies are already losing steam (the trailer for FF looks pretty bland to me, anyway) DC may be ready to assemble the JLA for the big screen. It's a pipe-dream, but dammit, I'm going with it.
While you chew on that, here's a story on a possible Wonder Woman movie, with a link to the actress most recently suggested for the starring role.
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