Loyal Leaguer Nathan Cone gets a write up in the Trinity University Alumni Newsletter.
Do you call The League a liar? Read here.
The League does not see such praise for himself coming anytime soon in The Alcalde as The League refuses to benefit mankind in any way shape or form. Truly, The League is a leech on society.
Yes, The League is officially a Texas-Ex. Shut up.
Friday, April 01, 2005
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Shit.
I just spent like half an hour working on another installment of "DITMTLOD". But I clicked the wrong dealy and it disappeared into the ether.
I blame only myself.
I confess if I were more focused and not trying to blog and watch the new program "Kojak" starring Ving Rhames, I might not have lost my posting.
Oh, well. What are you going to do?
On the plus side, I kind of like this Kojak show. I never watch cop shows, but I like Ving Rhames, and I sort of like catching up with this show from the first episode. If I come in even part way through a show's first season, I have trouble doing the work to catch up.
Alas, the DIMTMTLOD will have to wait for another day.
It should be noted that I also couldn't think up anything clever for April Fool's, so... uh... I feel as if I really dropped the ball.
Somehow I suspect you'll all get along fine for a few days until I get my act together.
I just spent like half an hour working on another installment of "DITMTLOD". But I clicked the wrong dealy and it disappeared into the ether.
I blame only myself.
I confess if I were more focused and not trying to blog and watch the new program "Kojak" starring Ving Rhames, I might not have lost my posting.
Oh, well. What are you going to do?
On the plus side, I kind of like this Kojak show. I never watch cop shows, but I like Ving Rhames, and I sort of like catching up with this show from the first episode. If I come in even part way through a show's first season, I have trouble doing the work to catch up.
Alas, the DIMTMTLOD will have to wait for another day.
It should be noted that I also couldn't think up anything clever for April Fool's, so... uh... I feel as if I really dropped the ball.
Somehow I suspect you'll all get along fine for a few days until I get my act together.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Happy Birthday, Peabo!
The 26th of March marked the 30th birthday of Jeffrey "Peabo" Peek. Peabo is a great guy with a lot of hare-brained ideas, and a whole lot of moxie.
I met him in 4th Grade after moving to Austin. He told me the entire story of "Red Dawn", scene for scene, the day I met him. He also didn't mind that I ate all the food in his pantry, so I sort of stuck tight for the next several years.
Jeff is a buddy, a pal, and also one of my crack team of legal experts I keep on retainer just in case. A short while ago he married Adrianna, a girl I assure you who is far too good for him. They recently adopted a schnauzer named "Homer," and, I assume are enjoying their new home.
Back in our youth, Peabo had a multitude of wacky ideas which probably should have gotten one or both of us killed, but despite our best efforts, we're still alive today.
I certainly do miss the guy, and I don't get to talk to him nearly often enough.
Happy Birthday, Peabo. I didn't get you anything.
A scene from the childhood of Peabo and The League
The 26th of March marked the 30th birthday of Jeffrey "Peabo" Peek. Peabo is a great guy with a lot of hare-brained ideas, and a whole lot of moxie.
I met him in 4th Grade after moving to Austin. He told me the entire story of "Red Dawn", scene for scene, the day I met him. He also didn't mind that I ate all the food in his pantry, so I sort of stuck tight for the next several years.
Jeff is a buddy, a pal, and also one of my crack team of legal experts I keep on retainer just in case. A short while ago he married Adrianna, a girl I assure you who is far too good for him. They recently adopted a schnauzer named "Homer," and, I assume are enjoying their new home.
Back in our youth, Peabo had a multitude of wacky ideas which probably should have gotten one or both of us killed, but despite our best efforts, we're still alive today.
I certainly do miss the guy, and I don't get to talk to him nearly often enough.
Happy Birthday, Peabo. I didn't get you anything.
A scene from the childhood of Peabo and The League
The League Presents:
Suggestions for Further Reading
A Sin City Special
Friday will see the release of what is sure to be a divisive movie among fans of pop culture. Frank Miller's Sin City is finally coming to a theater near you.
I am not going to guarantee you will enjoy Sin City. The content of the stories is minimal, hard-boiled stuff. The look and feel are stylized enough to be alienating, and the characters are not going to be immediately sympathetic. Nobody is clean down in Basin City.
By now you've heard all about how Robert Rodriguez was so committed to retaining the integrity of Frank Miller's work that he decided to bring Miller on-board as a co-director, and thusly had to give up his membership in the Director's Guild as it is against Director's Guild rules to allow for two directors on a single movie. Maybe you've heard how Rodriguez financed a short, which ultimately became the movie's opening scene, out of his own pocket.
You've probably also seen publicity stills and whatnot of green screens and artificial backgrounds.
Lots of crazy stuff. And all to make sure that Miller's work didn't just make it to the screen in spirit... Rodriguez wanted to make sure the books made it to the screen word for word, panel for panel.
This sort of thing doesn't happen for anything adapted for the big screen, comic book, novel, play, whatever... No matter what, the folks at the studio who know better always insist upon adding their own spin, changing storylines, adding or subtracting characters... there's always something. Even Spider-Man, a comic adaptation which truly captures the silver-age essence of the Spider-Man comics, brings Mary Jane in dozens of issues before her first appearance. It changes the Goblin's origin and costume. And, heck... they gave Spidey organic web-shooters instead of his wacky little mechanical web-shooters.
Let's not even get into where the Batman films took a detour and became their own unrecognizable entity.
It would have to take a fanboy of uncompromising spirit to do what Rodriguez has done, and it would take somebody like Miller to get him to do it. It's the ultimate gamble, but also the ultimate leap of faith.
Miller gave us some of the best comics of the past twenty-odd years, comics which opened up our young minds to new and better ideas. But to get there, Miller wrote and drew comics which took existing ideas and figured out why the ideas were brilliant, burning off the fat, tearing away the weakness and reigniting the fires of old fantasies, not just into a comforting glow of nostalgia, but into a raging inferno of the possibilities of genre and character. As much as a craftsman as he might be with Batman, he could just as easily turn in something like 300.
It was guys like Miller who put the thoughts into the heads of starry-eyed kids like Rodriguez back when he was a kid. He told us all the stories hadn't been told yet, and that maybe there are new ways to tell the ones which we already know.
We all have heroes growing up, and for better or worse, for a lot of us geeks, Frank Miller was the man. Even if it was just his Batman work, or, for a lot of lucky folks, his Daredevil work, or the classic Wolverine limited series.
And, if I'd been smarter, I'd have picked up Ronin back when I saw it on the shelf at B. Dalton when I was thirteen.
These days it's fascinating to see comics movies shed the stigma of being this medium where the producers seem vaguely embarassed of their own projects. In the hands of the geeks, at least the movies have a shot at reflecting the maturity which has been blossoming in comics since the 70's. Between guys like Raimi, Rodriguez and Goyer, it's the first time the film creators are able to stand up proudly and talk about the guys who had a hand in shaping their world.
You're lucky, you lucky bastards who don't love comics. You haven't spent year after year watching the characters you know and love come to the big screen as pale, diluted versions of the books you loved, each one more apologetic than the one before it as producers chased dollars before even trying to understand why a property had survived for thirty or more years.
Even with all that, misteps will always occur. Two of Miller's triumphs have been turned into films in the past few years, and both failed to capture much more than the wardrobes of the characters Miller breathed life into. 2003's Daredevil was a shadow of Miller's original storyline, and 2004's Elektra seemed to do anything but recognize why anybody had ever loved the character.
But Miller didn't own Daredevil, or Elektra. Marvel Comics owned them, and they could damn well do as they pleased.
His script for Robocop 2 was diluted and diluted until Miller's fingerprints were only there if you knew where to look.
So if he was a bit skeptical of turning Sin City into a movie, a project which has no voice in it but Miller's own? Who can blame him?
Luckily for us, Rodriguez got what it was Miller was doing, and decided if he would adapt it, he was going to do it right. He was going to bring Sin City to the screen, and he was going to do it panel by panel, and he was bringing Frank along to keep him honest.
In addition to the readings I've linked to above, I'm also suggesting the entire Sin City run. In particular, I'd turn you onto the books which you'll see highlighted in the movie.
1) The Hard Goodbye. The first (and some say, best) Sin City story tells the tale of poor old crazy Marv.
2) The Big Fat Kill. "You gotta stand up for your friends. Sometimes that means dying. Sometimes it means killing a whole lotta people."
3) That Yellow Bastard. Hartigan is maybe the last honest cop in Basin City. And in Sin City, that doesn't come without a price.
4) Booze, Broads and Bullets. A collection of short stories.
So when you go to see Sin City, I hope you enjoy. This movie isn't going to be capes and tights. If you're going to need a non-comic inspired reference, it's Raymond Chandler and Dashiell Hammet refracted through a broken whiskey bottle. It's going to be a crazy, hyper-violent thrill ride, and I hope you can sit back, relax, have fun and try not to take it all too seriously. Frank would be disappointed if you did.
It's some ways, this movie is nothing but the biggest thank-you one could ever think of giving Miller. We all just get to be in on it.
For the previous Suggestions, click here.
Suggestions for Further Reading
A Sin City Special
Friday will see the release of what is sure to be a divisive movie among fans of pop culture. Frank Miller's Sin City is finally coming to a theater near you.
I am not going to guarantee you will enjoy Sin City. The content of the stories is minimal, hard-boiled stuff. The look and feel are stylized enough to be alienating, and the characters are not going to be immediately sympathetic. Nobody is clean down in Basin City.
By now you've heard all about how Robert Rodriguez was so committed to retaining the integrity of Frank Miller's work that he decided to bring Miller on-board as a co-director, and thusly had to give up his membership in the Director's Guild as it is against Director's Guild rules to allow for two directors on a single movie. Maybe you've heard how Rodriguez financed a short, which ultimately became the movie's opening scene, out of his own pocket.
You've probably also seen publicity stills and whatnot of green screens and artificial backgrounds.
Lots of crazy stuff. And all to make sure that Miller's work didn't just make it to the screen in spirit... Rodriguez wanted to make sure the books made it to the screen word for word, panel for panel.
This sort of thing doesn't happen for anything adapted for the big screen, comic book, novel, play, whatever... No matter what, the folks at the studio who know better always insist upon adding their own spin, changing storylines, adding or subtracting characters... there's always something. Even Spider-Man, a comic adaptation which truly captures the silver-age essence of the Spider-Man comics, brings Mary Jane in dozens of issues before her first appearance. It changes the Goblin's origin and costume. And, heck... they gave Spidey organic web-shooters instead of his wacky little mechanical web-shooters.
Let's not even get into where the Batman films took a detour and became their own unrecognizable entity.
It would have to take a fanboy of uncompromising spirit to do what Rodriguez has done, and it would take somebody like Miller to get him to do it. It's the ultimate gamble, but also the ultimate leap of faith.
Miller gave us some of the best comics of the past twenty-odd years, comics which opened up our young minds to new and better ideas. But to get there, Miller wrote and drew comics which took existing ideas and figured out why the ideas were brilliant, burning off the fat, tearing away the weakness and reigniting the fires of old fantasies, not just into a comforting glow of nostalgia, but into a raging inferno of the possibilities of genre and character. As much as a craftsman as he might be with Batman, he could just as easily turn in something like 300.
It was guys like Miller who put the thoughts into the heads of starry-eyed kids like Rodriguez back when he was a kid. He told us all the stories hadn't been told yet, and that maybe there are new ways to tell the ones which we already know.
We all have heroes growing up, and for better or worse, for a lot of us geeks, Frank Miller was the man. Even if it was just his Batman work, or, for a lot of lucky folks, his Daredevil work, or the classic Wolverine limited series.
And, if I'd been smarter, I'd have picked up Ronin back when I saw it on the shelf at B. Dalton when I was thirteen.
These days it's fascinating to see comics movies shed the stigma of being this medium where the producers seem vaguely embarassed of their own projects. In the hands of the geeks, at least the movies have a shot at reflecting the maturity which has been blossoming in comics since the 70's. Between guys like Raimi, Rodriguez and Goyer, it's the first time the film creators are able to stand up proudly and talk about the guys who had a hand in shaping their world.
You're lucky, you lucky bastards who don't love comics. You haven't spent year after year watching the characters you know and love come to the big screen as pale, diluted versions of the books you loved, each one more apologetic than the one before it as producers chased dollars before even trying to understand why a property had survived for thirty or more years.
Even with all that, misteps will always occur. Two of Miller's triumphs have been turned into films in the past few years, and both failed to capture much more than the wardrobes of the characters Miller breathed life into. 2003's Daredevil was a shadow of Miller's original storyline, and 2004's Elektra seemed to do anything but recognize why anybody had ever loved the character.
But Miller didn't own Daredevil, or Elektra. Marvel Comics owned them, and they could damn well do as they pleased.
His script for Robocop 2 was diluted and diluted until Miller's fingerprints were only there if you knew where to look.
So if he was a bit skeptical of turning Sin City into a movie, a project which has no voice in it but Miller's own? Who can blame him?
Luckily for us, Rodriguez got what it was Miller was doing, and decided if he would adapt it, he was going to do it right. He was going to bring Sin City to the screen, and he was going to do it panel by panel, and he was bringing Frank along to keep him honest.
In addition to the readings I've linked to above, I'm also suggesting the entire Sin City run. In particular, I'd turn you onto the books which you'll see highlighted in the movie.
1) The Hard Goodbye. The first (and some say, best) Sin City story tells the tale of poor old crazy Marv.
2) The Big Fat Kill. "You gotta stand up for your friends. Sometimes that means dying. Sometimes it means killing a whole lotta people."
3) That Yellow Bastard. Hartigan is maybe the last honest cop in Basin City. And in Sin City, that doesn't come without a price.
4) Booze, Broads and Bullets. A collection of short stories.
So when you go to see Sin City, I hope you enjoy. This movie isn't going to be capes and tights. If you're going to need a non-comic inspired reference, it's Raymond Chandler and Dashiell Hammet refracted through a broken whiskey bottle. It's going to be a crazy, hyper-violent thrill ride, and I hope you can sit back, relax, have fun and try not to take it all too seriously. Frank would be disappointed if you did.
It's some ways, this movie is nothing but the biggest thank-you one could ever think of giving Miller. We all just get to be in on it.
For the previous Suggestions, click here.
Monday, March 28, 2005
Hey Uncle Bob!
So. It appears that my uncle, "Pentagon" Bob, has been lurking here at The League for quite some time. And by quite some time, I mean, at least a year.
"Pentagon" Bob earned his name by working for the military for years, and this meant his office was right there in the Pentagon. Which, of course, meant that all of my friends were convinced Bob was some sort of secret agent. I am still not convinced Bob is not a secret agent. He lurked here at The league for over a year, and I had no idea he was here. Pretty sneaky, eh?
Bob is married to Linda, who is one groovy chick all on her own. She may also be a spy, but we'll never know, will we?
Bob once took me on a tour of the Pentagon, and I tell you this: I have never seen so many urinals in one, single men's room. That, and these urinals were spotless. That's a fine example of either military discipline or precision, and I have not yet decided which it truly represents.
The other thing you need to know about the Pentagon is this: It's huge. Any enemy forces planning to infiltrate the Pentagon are completely wasting their time. They're going to get lost and end up having to ask for directions.
Thanks to a wicked combination of a derth of vacation days and conflicting family vacation events, I very rarely get to see Bob and Linda these days. It's tough to get all of us in one place at the same time. That, and Bob's constant spy work keeps him busy.
Anyway, it appears that, thanks to Pentagon Bob, my folks located not just my blog, but they also recently located that of Brother Dearest. I assume Jason will now be far more paranoid about what gets posted over at AoS.
I am curious what illusions Bob might have once had about his two cherubic nephews that we've managed to shatter, tread upon and then toss in the dust-bin. Ah, well. Hopefully they'll keep sending nice Christmas cards.
But you gotta love Bob. I shall never forget that when everyone else failed me one bleak Christmas, it was Bob who provided us with Nerf Boomerangs. Those things rocked.
So. It appears that my uncle, "Pentagon" Bob, has been lurking here at The League for quite some time. And by quite some time, I mean, at least a year.
"Pentagon" Bob earned his name by working for the military for years, and this meant his office was right there in the Pentagon. Which, of course, meant that all of my friends were convinced Bob was some sort of secret agent. I am still not convinced Bob is not a secret agent. He lurked here at The league for over a year, and I had no idea he was here. Pretty sneaky, eh?
Bob is married to Linda, who is one groovy chick all on her own. She may also be a spy, but we'll never know, will we?
Bob once took me on a tour of the Pentagon, and I tell you this: I have never seen so many urinals in one, single men's room. That, and these urinals were spotless. That's a fine example of either military discipline or precision, and I have not yet decided which it truly represents.
The other thing you need to know about the Pentagon is this: It's huge. Any enemy forces planning to infiltrate the Pentagon are completely wasting their time. They're going to get lost and end up having to ask for directions.
Thanks to a wicked combination of a derth of vacation days and conflicting family vacation events, I very rarely get to see Bob and Linda these days. It's tough to get all of us in one place at the same time. That, and Bob's constant spy work keeps him busy.
Anyway, it appears that, thanks to Pentagon Bob, my folks located not just my blog, but they also recently located that of Brother Dearest. I assume Jason will now be far more paranoid about what gets posted over at AoS.
I am curious what illusions Bob might have once had about his two cherubic nephews that we've managed to shatter, tread upon and then toss in the dust-bin. Ah, well. Hopefully they'll keep sending nice Christmas cards.
But you gotta love Bob. I shall never forget that when everyone else failed me one bleak Christmas, it was Bob who provided us with Nerf Boomerangs. Those things rocked.
People always say to me: League, why don't you like going to the beach?
As a child, I loved going to the beach. And then one day when I was about 9, I realized that I no longer liked the beach.
I sunburn. I am one pale, highly flammable bastard, and the slightest bit of sunlight turns me lobster red. Not only do I burn, but I always felt sick from dehydration. Whatever fun I had for a few hours grew to be ruined by a) the constant worry of burning b) getting out of the water every fifteen minutes to apply more suntan lotion c) the horrible, greasy feel of suntan lotion caked on, mixed with salt water and sand d) in 1997 I finally REALLY misjudged, and after an hour and a half in the sun, I was burned so badly that I got the blisters. That SUCKED.
and the real kicker: Everybody has to take a bug-eyed at you and exclaim, "Boy, are you sunburned! Didn't you use sunscreen?"
Yes, yes I did use sunscreen on my trip to San Diego. But I did not use it yesterday as I didn't realize I would be outside for any duration.
I own a mirror. I know I am sunburned. I do not need to be told by each person who walks by my office that I am sunburned. I do, in fact, know that sunscreen exists and I am used to applying it in liberal quantities. Sometimes it is difficult to judge if you need it, and yesterday I misjudged.
I am now going to print a sign and tape it to my monitor to inform my co-workers that I know I am sunburned and that I do not need any help or instructions for future exposure to sunlight.
As a child, I loved going to the beach. And then one day when I was about 9, I realized that I no longer liked the beach.
I sunburn. I am one pale, highly flammable bastard, and the slightest bit of sunlight turns me lobster red. Not only do I burn, but I always felt sick from dehydration. Whatever fun I had for a few hours grew to be ruined by a) the constant worry of burning b) getting out of the water every fifteen minutes to apply more suntan lotion c) the horrible, greasy feel of suntan lotion caked on, mixed with salt water and sand d) in 1997 I finally REALLY misjudged, and after an hour and a half in the sun, I was burned so badly that I got the blisters. That SUCKED.
and the real kicker: Everybody has to take a bug-eyed at you and exclaim, "Boy, are you sunburned! Didn't you use sunscreen?"
Yes, yes I did use sunscreen on my trip to San Diego. But I did not use it yesterday as I didn't realize I would be outside for any duration.
I own a mirror. I know I am sunburned. I do not need to be told by each person who walks by my office that I am sunburned. I do, in fact, know that sunscreen exists and I am used to applying it in liberal quantities. Sometimes it is difficult to judge if you need it, and yesterday I misjudged.
I am now going to print a sign and tape it to my monitor to inform my co-workers that I know I am sunburned and that I do not need any help or instructions for future exposure to sunlight.
Sunday, March 27, 2005
Stay classy, San Diego!
Well, we're back. Let me say that San Diego is a lovely town with friendly people and a lot to offer. We had ourselves quite a time, and I would very much liek to go back.
We stayed at a loverly hotel just off Balboa Park, The Balboa Park Inn.
It was made up of several former small apartment buildings, and each room was given a unique theme. We stayed in The Orient Express.
Jamie poses in our fabulous suite
The evening we arrived we went on a harbor tour and got a good look at some naval vessels, some cargo vessels, Coronado Island, etc... Very nice. The tour guide was deemed controversial, but all in all, it was an interesting tour.
The next morning we got up early, got breakfast, and headed for the San Diego Zoo (only a few blocks from the hotel).
Gorillas rampaged all about the park. We feared for our very lives.
Joining us on our trip were Jamie's brother, Doug... His lady-friend, Kristen, and Jamie's pal, Heather "H" Wagner.
Doug, Kristen, H, Jamie
The best transit at the San Diego Zoo? Skycar!
Heather spots a loose gorilla in a passing Skycar
San Diego is also home to a few Giant Pandas. These guys are terribly endangered.
This Panda is trying to sleep one off after yet another night out with the hippos.
Jamie was delighted to see the Pandas. It was a highlight of our visit to the San Diego Zoo. Especially with all the loose gorillas causing so much trouble.
Jamie is delighted to have seen a Panda. Up until this point, she's usually only eaten them.
Toward the end of the day, we paused at the Elephant Exhibit.
Nothing finishes off a day like an elephant.
We didn't have a shot at finishing seeing the whole zoo. The place is enormous and very hilly. I could have easily done another whole day at the zoo, and hope to return soon to see the rest of the exhibits.
I didn't take too many pictures after this, but we went for a lovely dinner last night at Prado restaurant. It was a lot of fun, and it was significantly better than the dinner at the tourist trap we'd gone to the night before.
Today we got up and ran over to Coronado Island. Very nice place with a lot of history.
At any rate, hope you all had a good weekend. We sure did.
Well, we're back. Let me say that San Diego is a lovely town with friendly people and a lot to offer. We had ourselves quite a time, and I would very much liek to go back.
We stayed at a loverly hotel just off Balboa Park, The Balboa Park Inn.
It was made up of several former small apartment buildings, and each room was given a unique theme. We stayed in The Orient Express.
Jamie poses in our fabulous suite
The evening we arrived we went on a harbor tour and got a good look at some naval vessels, some cargo vessels, Coronado Island, etc... Very nice. The tour guide was deemed controversial, but all in all, it was an interesting tour.
The next morning we got up early, got breakfast, and headed for the San Diego Zoo (only a few blocks from the hotel).
Gorillas rampaged all about the park. We feared for our very lives.
Joining us on our trip were Jamie's brother, Doug... His lady-friend, Kristen, and Jamie's pal, Heather "H" Wagner.
Doug, Kristen, H, Jamie
The best transit at the San Diego Zoo? Skycar!
Heather spots a loose gorilla in a passing Skycar
San Diego is also home to a few Giant Pandas. These guys are terribly endangered.
This Panda is trying to sleep one off after yet another night out with the hippos.
Jamie was delighted to see the Pandas. It was a highlight of our visit to the San Diego Zoo. Especially with all the loose gorillas causing so much trouble.
Jamie is delighted to have seen a Panda. Up until this point, she's usually only eaten them.
Toward the end of the day, we paused at the Elephant Exhibit.
Nothing finishes off a day like an elephant.
We didn't have a shot at finishing seeing the whole zoo. The place is enormous and very hilly. I could have easily done another whole day at the zoo, and hope to return soon to see the rest of the exhibits.
I didn't take too many pictures after this, but we went for a lovely dinner last night at Prado restaurant. It was a lot of fun, and it was significantly better than the dinner at the tourist trap we'd gone to the night before.
Today we got up and ran over to Coronado Island. Very nice place with a lot of history.
At any rate, hope you all had a good weekend. We sure did.
Thursday, March 24, 2005
A Birthday for Jamie
Hey, everybuddy! Friday is Jamie's big birthday. In order to celebrate, we're shaking the dirt of this one horse town off our sorry hides and we're heading for sunny San Diego, California.
Jamie turns the big three-oh on this particular birthday, and it's a landmark occasion by anybody's measure. Hopefully she will refrain from making me put away my childish things.
She's a special person, she is. And I am very lucky to have her. She is beautiful and funny and smart, and she's as kind and patient as anyone. She gives without asking, and makes my life better.
She puts up with a lot from me and from the world, and she does it all with infinite grace. I never stop learning from her.
She is the world to me, and I hope that I can make a fraction as happy on her birthday as she makes me each day.
Happy birthday, Jamie. I love you.
Needless to say, you'll note that The League is going on hiatus until our return next week.
Hey, everybuddy! Friday is Jamie's big birthday. In order to celebrate, we're shaking the dirt of this one horse town off our sorry hides and we're heading for sunny San Diego, California.
Jamie turns the big three-oh on this particular birthday, and it's a landmark occasion by anybody's measure. Hopefully she will refrain from making me put away my childish things.
She's a special person, she is. And I am very lucky to have her. She is beautiful and funny and smart, and she's as kind and patient as anyone. She gives without asking, and makes my life better.
She puts up with a lot from me and from the world, and she does it all with infinite grace. I never stop learning from her.
She is the world to me, and I hope that I can make a fraction as happy on her birthday as she makes me each day.
Happy birthday, Jamie. I love you.
Needless to say, you'll note that The League is going on hiatus until our return next week.
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
The League Presents: Samantha Maja Cone
Leaguers, last week we brought you the first published account of the shocking new entrant to the human race, Samantha Maja Cone. Just mere hours after her arrival on Planet Earth, Samantha's pa, Nathan, rung me up to tell me all was well with baby and mother.
Now Renata and Samantha are home, and the first pics of Samantha are in.
Samantha contemplates the mysteries of the cosmos. Note, she already has her wrist band for ZZ Top tickets. Rock n' Rollllllllllll!!!!!
Samantha is prepped for travel and/ or sleeping. Jamie wears a similar harness so she doesn't fall out of bed.
Samantha is tuckered out after her big travel day. Ah, to go back to the simple days of her youth, floating suspended in a pod of amniotic fluid...
Nathan and Renata try to guess how much the baby will fetch on the black market.
So congratulations, Cones! You done had a baby! You guys are going to be groovy parents.
Just remember, it's never too late to change her legal name to "Dr. Octopus."
Leaguers, last week we brought you the first published account of the shocking new entrant to the human race, Samantha Maja Cone. Just mere hours after her arrival on Planet Earth, Samantha's pa, Nathan, rung me up to tell me all was well with baby and mother.
Now Renata and Samantha are home, and the first pics of Samantha are in.
Samantha contemplates the mysteries of the cosmos. Note, she already has her wrist band for ZZ Top tickets. Rock n' Rollllllllllll!!!!!
Samantha is prepped for travel and/ or sleeping. Jamie wears a similar harness so she doesn't fall out of bed.
Samantha is tuckered out after her big travel day. Ah, to go back to the simple days of her youth, floating suspended in a pod of amniotic fluid...
Nathan and Renata try to guess how much the baby will fetch on the black market.
So congratulations, Cones! You done had a baby! You guys are going to be groovy parents.
Just remember, it's never too late to change her legal name to "Dr. Octopus."
Monday, March 21, 2005
The League presents: Suggestions for Further Reading
For all the comics-related broo-ha-ha which goes on here at The League, all too infrequently do I feel I really point potential readers to comics which they may enjoy.
Now, keep in mind, literally hundreds of comics are published every month, so this is not some exhaustive, definitive list of worthwhile comics. This list is meant to be a sort of suggestion box for folks who might pop their head into the local comic shop and find the sensory overload a bit frightening.
This being the first column on this topic, I want to cover a few things in case you are new to comics and you want to take a look inside your local comic shop. Next time we'll move on to actual comics The League would suggest for further reading.
Tips for the new comics consumer:
1) Tell the guy behind the counter that you don't know anything about comics, but you're curious. Come prepared to tell him what TV shows and movies you like. This is helpful as many, many comics are not about superheroes. Some are funny, some are soap operas. Some are historical fiction.
2) Do not feel obligated to buy a comic just because the counter guy put it in your hand. If it appears to be too violent or too sexy or whatever, it probably is. You CAN try telling them "that's a bit more (violent, sexy, etc...) than what I had in mind."
If the comic shop guy can't adjust his/her mindset to point you toward something you're more comfortable with, s/he's a bum and should go out of business. Go ahead, browse for a minute and then leave.
3) Manga is not a genre. Manga just suggests a comic came from Asia and will have a few cultural shorthand things in common (big eyes on some characters, an alarming number of girls dressed as nurses and school girls). There are all kinds of Manga, so don't go in expecting all ninjas or G-Force or giant robots. There is also something called hentai. Do not touch.
4) If you are a girl, do not make eye-contact with the boys shopping in the store. The comic nerds are already afraid of you and may do something rash if they feel threatened.
If a comic nerd not affiliated with the store attempts to talk to you, answer him politely and avoid eye-contact. Actually addressing him will lead him to believe he has found his soulmate, and you just got yourself a stalker.
5) For the love of Mike, if you find something you decide is so goofy you want to make a scene, don't. Do not make a big show out of making fun of the goofy item. a) you may be completely misunderstanding some insidery comic-book joke, or b) you may have just broken the heart of the comic nerd who was standing behind you waiting for you to move so he could grab his copy of "Underage Radioactive Samurai Salamanders". This guy may have devoted his entire life to collecting "Underage Radioactive Samurai Salamanders", and you've just ruined the one thing which was making this guy's life bearable. He's 55 and lives with his mother. For God's sake, be kind.
6) Yes, they all wear tights and have huge pectoral muscles.
7) Yes, the girls are all drawn in very little clothing. The unrealistic proportions are not meant to make you feel bad about yourself.
If you must, you can feel secure in the knowledge that the artist's closest contact with real women is the checkout girl at Blockbuster.
8) No, you cannot actually do that in real life. We already know that it is unlikely that Batman could actually, physically, ever take that pose or survive jumping off of roofs.
9) Yes, the crappy looking black and white comics are drawn by pale, pimply looking guys who have girlfriends who look just like them. It is exactly as you suspect.
10) Yes, there are really THAT MANY Batman books on the shelf. And, yes, surprisingly, that many Archie comics. I don't know who reads them, either.
11) Prepare yourself for bizarre debates which may sound as if they are taking place in the psycho ward at county hospital. There may be some boring conversation about writers and artists, but be prepared for lengthy discussions on Batman's ears, the identity of the BEST Green Lantern, and who is stronger, Thor or (insert super-strong super hero here). These conversations will go on for far too long. And get really weird. And Superman is stronger than Thor. End of story.
12) The comic shop will also carry lots of extras, such as toys, posters and role-playing game materials. There are also trading card games and a game called "Hero Clix." Do not, under any circumstances, allow anyone to engage you in a discussion on "Hero Clix", "Vs." or "Magic: The Gathering."
If this occurs, feign ignorance of the english language.
13) If you are looking for comics for small kids, make sure you immediately tell the shop keep that you are looking for a children's comics. Tell him/her how old the child is, and await further instructions. Do not assume because something looks cute, it is innocent. Sometime I will have Jamie discuss "Fancy Froglin and the Sexy Forest".
14) It is, in fact, true that Watchmen and Dark Knight Returns are the greatest superhero comics ever written. If anyone disagrees with this statement in the comic shop, you can punch them in the gut, because they're a filthy liar. No, Deadpool is not better than either of them. The guy who just told you that is an idiot.
15) If you're artsy, go in to the store, request Craig Thompson's "Blankets" or something by Daniel Clowes. You'll be happier and feel really arty.
16) If you hate your own life, request the work of Chris Ware. You'll get a really interesting comic and you will have your worst fears confirmed.
17) Comics are not like books. It may take a short while to adapt to the visual language of comics, especially as you jump from artist to artist and genre to genre.
So that's it. That's my tips for going to the comic shop. Next time I'll actually come back and suggest some comics for further reading.
For all the comics-related broo-ha-ha which goes on here at The League, all too infrequently do I feel I really point potential readers to comics which they may enjoy.
Now, keep in mind, literally hundreds of comics are published every month, so this is not some exhaustive, definitive list of worthwhile comics. This list is meant to be a sort of suggestion box for folks who might pop their head into the local comic shop and find the sensory overload a bit frightening.
This being the first column on this topic, I want to cover a few things in case you are new to comics and you want to take a look inside your local comic shop. Next time we'll move on to actual comics The League would suggest for further reading.
Tips for the new comics consumer:
1) Tell the guy behind the counter that you don't know anything about comics, but you're curious. Come prepared to tell him what TV shows and movies you like. This is helpful as many, many comics are not about superheroes. Some are funny, some are soap operas. Some are historical fiction.
2) Do not feel obligated to buy a comic just because the counter guy put it in your hand. If it appears to be too violent or too sexy or whatever, it probably is. You CAN try telling them "that's a bit more (violent, sexy, etc...) than what I had in mind."
If the comic shop guy can't adjust his/her mindset to point you toward something you're more comfortable with, s/he's a bum and should go out of business. Go ahead, browse for a minute and then leave.
3) Manga is not a genre. Manga just suggests a comic came from Asia and will have a few cultural shorthand things in common (big eyes on some characters, an alarming number of girls dressed as nurses and school girls). There are all kinds of Manga, so don't go in expecting all ninjas or G-Force or giant robots. There is also something called hentai. Do not touch.
4) If you are a girl, do not make eye-contact with the boys shopping in the store. The comic nerds are already afraid of you and may do something rash if they feel threatened.
If a comic nerd not affiliated with the store attempts to talk to you, answer him politely and avoid eye-contact. Actually addressing him will lead him to believe he has found his soulmate, and you just got yourself a stalker.
5) For the love of Mike, if you find something you decide is so goofy you want to make a scene, don't. Do not make a big show out of making fun of the goofy item. a) you may be completely misunderstanding some insidery comic-book joke, or b) you may have just broken the heart of the comic nerd who was standing behind you waiting for you to move so he could grab his copy of "Underage Radioactive Samurai Salamanders". This guy may have devoted his entire life to collecting "Underage Radioactive Samurai Salamanders", and you've just ruined the one thing which was making this guy's life bearable. He's 55 and lives with his mother. For God's sake, be kind.
6) Yes, they all wear tights and have huge pectoral muscles.
7) Yes, the girls are all drawn in very little clothing. The unrealistic proportions are not meant to make you feel bad about yourself.
If you must, you can feel secure in the knowledge that the artist's closest contact with real women is the checkout girl at Blockbuster.
8) No, you cannot actually do that in real life. We already know that it is unlikely that Batman could actually, physically, ever take that pose or survive jumping off of roofs.
9) Yes, the crappy looking black and white comics are drawn by pale, pimply looking guys who have girlfriends who look just like them. It is exactly as you suspect.
10) Yes, there are really THAT MANY Batman books on the shelf. And, yes, surprisingly, that many Archie comics. I don't know who reads them, either.
11) Prepare yourself for bizarre debates which may sound as if they are taking place in the psycho ward at county hospital. There may be some boring conversation about writers and artists, but be prepared for lengthy discussions on Batman's ears, the identity of the BEST Green Lantern, and who is stronger, Thor or (insert super-strong super hero here). These conversations will go on for far too long. And get really weird. And Superman is stronger than Thor. End of story.
12) The comic shop will also carry lots of extras, such as toys, posters and role-playing game materials. There are also trading card games and a game called "Hero Clix." Do not, under any circumstances, allow anyone to engage you in a discussion on "Hero Clix", "Vs." or "Magic: The Gathering."
If this occurs, feign ignorance of the english language.
13) If you are looking for comics for small kids, make sure you immediately tell the shop keep that you are looking for a children's comics. Tell him/her how old the child is, and await further instructions. Do not assume because something looks cute, it is innocent. Sometime I will have Jamie discuss "Fancy Froglin and the Sexy Forest".
14) It is, in fact, true that Watchmen and Dark Knight Returns are the greatest superhero comics ever written. If anyone disagrees with this statement in the comic shop, you can punch them in the gut, because they're a filthy liar. No, Deadpool is not better than either of them. The guy who just told you that is an idiot.
15) If you're artsy, go in to the store, request Craig Thompson's "Blankets" or something by Daniel Clowes. You'll be happier and feel really arty.
16) If you hate your own life, request the work of Chris Ware. You'll get a really interesting comic and you will have your worst fears confirmed.
17) Comics are not like books. It may take a short while to adapt to the visual language of comics, especially as you jump from artist to artist and genre to genre.
So that's it. That's my tips for going to the comic shop. Next time I'll actually come back and suggest some comics for further reading.
Sunday, March 20, 2005
Fake animals on the TV!!!
I'm watching a kick-ass fake documentary on Animal Planet about dragons.
Tolkein aside, I haven't been much of a swords, sorcerers and dragons sort of guy in many years. (What ever happened to you Zack the Elf? You were the best D&D character ever...!) But this show rocks.
Anyway, if this replays, you have to check it out.
It is far superior to the movie I watched last week on cable.
I guess this Dragon program is kicking off a week of specials on mythological and imaginary creatures called "Animal X."
You can see the listings for this week and choose which epsidoes you want to watch. I, myself, will be tuning in for the episode on Thursday night which may or may not feature footage of my brother.
From my program listings:
Bigfoot: Investigator might have discovered evidence that Bigfoot is alive and well in Texas.
I'm watching a kick-ass fake documentary on Animal Planet about dragons.
Tolkein aside, I haven't been much of a swords, sorcerers and dragons sort of guy in many years. (What ever happened to you Zack the Elf? You were the best D&D character ever...!) But this show rocks.
Anyway, if this replays, you have to check it out.
It is far superior to the movie I watched last week on cable.
I guess this Dragon program is kicking off a week of specials on mythological and imaginary creatures called "Animal X."
You can see the listings for this week and choose which epsidoes you want to watch. I, myself, will be tuning in for the episode on Thursday night which may or may not feature footage of my brother.
From my program listings:
Bigfoot: Investigator might have discovered evidence that Bigfoot is alive and well in Texas.
Dear Melbotis
Jamie writes:
Dear Melbotis,
It's been a while since we've heard from you. Are you still answering questions? What's your take on new puppy Lucy? How has her presence changed your life? How has it changed Jeff the Cat's?
Dear Jamie,
Melbotis agree that it been long time since Mel say much. Ever since Mel get e-mail, Mel have many, many e-mails. Mel keep getting e-mail from many bank asking for information for verification and Mel keep having to send and send and send. Won't bank keep Mel information written down on sticky paper?
Also, Mel send off for pills to make Mel a "man." Mel looking forward to being man and yelling at other dogs. "Sit down, doggy! Go outside, doggy!" Mel will play trick when Mel is man and Mel will go into garbage can all he want and nobody stop him.
This is what Mel think he look like when he is man.
(Mel not sure if this accurate, but Mel hear this man maybe have no testicles either)
Mel will answer many questions when Mel get them, but sometime Mel get question and he forget despite Mel having best of intentions.
Thank you, Jamie for reminding Mel every ten minutes of e-mail.
You ask about little black dog who show up. Little black dog kind of scare Mel, then Mel remember he is huge and show little black dog who boss is. So Mel pretend to eat little black dog, and when that not work, Mel actually try to eat little black dog. Little black dog is much better now.
In some way, little black dog is happy addition to backyard. Mel spend many, many afternoon in backyard with nothing to do except protect house from stupid neighbor dog. And while laying in sunshine and occasionally barking at other doggies has it plusses, sometimes Mel will get bored and sleep for, oh.... ten hour straight. Mel suppose this not real good for Mel's weight (which Stupid Man always say is, "Just fine, my man. We'll be fat together.")
Anyway, little black dog say to me, "Hey, doggy! Hey, doggy! Hey, doggy!"
And Mel say, "What?"
And she say, "What?"
And Mel say, "You say 'Hey, doggy!'"
And little black doggy say, "What?"
And Mel say, "What?"
And then little black doggy go off and chew on a rock.
Sometime she chew on Mel's ear, and Mel have to pin Lucy, but all in all, Mel like little black doggy and hope he not have to eat her.
Before answering mail, Mel went to cat and said, "hey, Cat! What about little black dog?"
And Jeff say, "-the temperature at 5:00 shall be 72 degrees with winds out of the southwest."
And Mel say, "No, little black doggy."
And Jeff say, "Your classic rock station with all the hits! Rockin' 98.5 FM!!!!"
So Mel not sure. But sometime Jeff throw up now after little black doggy tries to say "Hello."
Mel hope all Leaguers having good day. Mel happy to be back at glowy pizza box thing.
Jamie writes:
Dear Melbotis,
It's been a while since we've heard from you. Are you still answering questions? What's your take on new puppy Lucy? How has her presence changed your life? How has it changed Jeff the Cat's?
Dear Jamie,
Melbotis agree that it been long time since Mel say much. Ever since Mel get e-mail, Mel have many, many e-mails. Mel keep getting e-mail from many bank asking for information for verification and Mel keep having to send and send and send. Won't bank keep Mel information written down on sticky paper?
Also, Mel send off for pills to make Mel a "man." Mel looking forward to being man and yelling at other dogs. "Sit down, doggy! Go outside, doggy!" Mel will play trick when Mel is man and Mel will go into garbage can all he want and nobody stop him.
This is what Mel think he look like when he is man.
(Mel not sure if this accurate, but Mel hear this man maybe have no testicles either)
Mel will answer many questions when Mel get them, but sometime Mel get question and he forget despite Mel having best of intentions.
Thank you, Jamie for reminding Mel every ten minutes of e-mail.
You ask about little black dog who show up. Little black dog kind of scare Mel, then Mel remember he is huge and show little black dog who boss is. So Mel pretend to eat little black dog, and when that not work, Mel actually try to eat little black dog. Little black dog is much better now.
In some way, little black dog is happy addition to backyard. Mel spend many, many afternoon in backyard with nothing to do except protect house from stupid neighbor dog. And while laying in sunshine and occasionally barking at other doggies has it plusses, sometimes Mel will get bored and sleep for, oh.... ten hour straight. Mel suppose this not real good for Mel's weight (which Stupid Man always say is, "Just fine, my man. We'll be fat together.")
Anyway, little black dog say to me, "Hey, doggy! Hey, doggy! Hey, doggy!"
And Mel say, "What?"
And she say, "What?"
And Mel say, "You say 'Hey, doggy!'"
And little black doggy say, "What?"
And Mel say, "What?"
And then little black doggy go off and chew on a rock.
Sometime she chew on Mel's ear, and Mel have to pin Lucy, but all in all, Mel like little black doggy and hope he not have to eat her.
Before answering mail, Mel went to cat and said, "hey, Cat! What about little black dog?"
And Jeff say, "-the temperature at 5:00 shall be 72 degrees with winds out of the southwest."
And Mel say, "No, little black doggy."
And Jeff say, "Your classic rock station with all the hits! Rockin' 98.5 FM!!!!"
So Mel not sure. But sometime Jeff throw up now after little black doggy tries to say "Hello."
Mel hope all Leaguers having good day. Mel happy to be back at glowy pizza box thing.
Friday, March 18, 2005
A BABY CONE FOR 2005!!!!
Hey, everybuddy!
Nathan called a while ago, and I am happy to announce the existence of one Samantha Cone.
Samantha was born around 10:00am CST this morning.
She is 7lbs. 4oz.
20 inches long.
Brown Hair.
I am unable to secure a photo of Samantha as of yet, so I am posting this delight ful picture of a very cute kitten.
I asked, and it sounds like Nathan and Renata are both doing well. They had a long night, but all systems appear to be checking out normal.
Oh, boy, are kitties ever cute. Here's another kitten I saw online.
Congratulations to Nathan and Renata! And welcome to the world, Samantha C.! You have some terrific parents, and I am sure you will be the grooviest kid on your block!
Oh, heck... here's another kitten.
Hey, everybuddy!
Nathan called a while ago, and I am happy to announce the existence of one Samantha Cone.
Samantha was born around 10:00am CST this morning.
She is 7lbs. 4oz.
20 inches long.
Brown Hair.
I am unable to secure a photo of Samantha as of yet, so I am posting this delight ful picture of a very cute kitten.
I asked, and it sounds like Nathan and Renata are both doing well. They had a long night, but all systems appear to be checking out normal.
Oh, boy, are kitties ever cute. Here's another kitten I saw online.
Congratulations to Nathan and Renata! And welcome to the world, Samantha C.! You have some terrific parents, and I am sure you will be the grooviest kid on your block!
Oh, heck... here's another kitten.
Thursday, March 17, 2005
Baseball, steroids and congress = a tremendous waste of time
We have at least one war going on, multiple hostile nations on the brink of nuclear armament, and, depending on your political stance, a plethora of other shenanigans going on within our own government. We're running an insanely expensive war on drugs and pretty much losing hands down. Our educational system is in core meltdown, and we've got a laundry list of other massive social, economic and international problems longer than my arm and typed in 5 point font.
It's irritating enough that Michael Jackson's case is filling page after page of copy. When I heard E! was running daily re-enactments, I had planned to follow it here, but 1) it isn't funny, 2) I'm intentionally not following any of the trial.
What's really, really irritating is that today Congress actually spent time bothering to "investigate" the Major League Baseball steroid story. And even more irritating is the fact that it was THE BIG STORY of the week.
This is a problem which affects, what? Maybe a few hundred people? It's not costing anybody money, it's not killing anybody, and from what I can tell, it might actually be making baseball interesting for the first time since Roger Maris hung up his glove.
Are these guys using steroids? Are you KIDDING ME? Fifteen years ago we thought Reggie Jackson was a big guy for baseball. Now guys like Conseco look like they could tip over a Hyundai. You don't get built up like that from popping a few into the outfield during practice. And nobody ever thought Babe Ruth was slugging them over the wall thanks to his fine physique.
American sport is rife with roid freaks, and even if they AREN'T roid freaks, they're athletes who are paid millions of dollars to do nothing all day and pump their bodies until they look like 80's era Schwarzenegger. People watched football back when it was iron-man football and the players had to keep a day job to make ends meet. Roger Maris got where he got with good timing, practice and luck.
My point is this: It's only the athlete's sense of ego that drives them to feel that they shouldn't just get paid a king's wages, but that they should be able to overcome any minor limitations left to them with their tremendous physical acuity. It's not enough to play in MLB. You've got to be the most expensive guy on the field, too.
I guess the problem has been that the MLB basically wasn't going to do anything about steroid abuse among their own players, and the perception is that this is somehow influencing young people into also getting into steroids. Anyway, that's the connection I'm drawing as to why these guys are sitting up there testifying. Other than that, the logic of the whole thing sort of astounds me.
After all, it's never been suggested the MLB is providing the players with steroids. It's never been suggested that MLB did much more than organize the leagues. If, in fact, there is some evidence that MLB is somehow providing people with steroids, does anyone really believe that the commissioners are going to break down just because the government is making thems it down at a table? I'm not really clear about what, exactly, people are trying to accomplish. If Congress is really this interested in the steroid issue in pro sports (which would affect maybe 20, 000 people, I would guess?), then isn't it the job of Congress to pass laws or something? And occasionally be dicks to each other about judicial appointments? I forget.
This has nothing to do with concerns about the public health. After all, most kids aren't going to Saturday night parties and being handed a syringe of steroids. Nothing is going to come out of this other than a lot of ruined ball-players careers. Especially when the public is mostly just shrugging the whole thing off and doesn't really seem to care. But they sure seem to be willing to read about it. This is about famous people being naughty, just like that nutty Paris Hilton. So, sure, it gets loads of coverage.
And why? Because our National Pasttime isn't baseball, it's watching celebrities go down in flames.
We might feel bad that some kids in high school may have been more predisposed to suicide because of the mood swings attributed to steroids, but by the time you've finished saying "mood swings attributed to steroids may have", you've already lost 80% of your audience. We're infinitely more interested to see if Hulk look-alike Mark McGwire is going to flip out under Big Brother's unblinking gaze and start smashing furniture with steroid freak super strength.
It takes baseball all freaking season to rev up this much drama.
I'll go out on a limb and say this: I don't care if baseball players are all out there using steroids. Don't care.
If Congress is really concerned about companies providing their cash cows with performance ehnancing drugs, they might want to check out how the recording industry and film industry work sometime. Not to mention that the only reason I stay in my job is that the university keeps me knee deep in free coffee.
We have at least one war going on, multiple hostile nations on the brink of nuclear armament, and, depending on your political stance, a plethora of other shenanigans going on within our own government. We're running an insanely expensive war on drugs and pretty much losing hands down. Our educational system is in core meltdown, and we've got a laundry list of other massive social, economic and international problems longer than my arm and typed in 5 point font.
It's irritating enough that Michael Jackson's case is filling page after page of copy. When I heard E! was running daily re-enactments, I had planned to follow it here, but 1) it isn't funny, 2) I'm intentionally not following any of the trial.
What's really, really irritating is that today Congress actually spent time bothering to "investigate" the Major League Baseball steroid story. And even more irritating is the fact that it was THE BIG STORY of the week.
This is a problem which affects, what? Maybe a few hundred people? It's not costing anybody money, it's not killing anybody, and from what I can tell, it might actually be making baseball interesting for the first time since Roger Maris hung up his glove.
Are these guys using steroids? Are you KIDDING ME? Fifteen years ago we thought Reggie Jackson was a big guy for baseball. Now guys like Conseco look like they could tip over a Hyundai. You don't get built up like that from popping a few into the outfield during practice. And nobody ever thought Babe Ruth was slugging them over the wall thanks to his fine physique.
American sport is rife with roid freaks, and even if they AREN'T roid freaks, they're athletes who are paid millions of dollars to do nothing all day and pump their bodies until they look like 80's era Schwarzenegger. People watched football back when it was iron-man football and the players had to keep a day job to make ends meet. Roger Maris got where he got with good timing, practice and luck.
My point is this: It's only the athlete's sense of ego that drives them to feel that they shouldn't just get paid a king's wages, but that they should be able to overcome any minor limitations left to them with their tremendous physical acuity. It's not enough to play in MLB. You've got to be the most expensive guy on the field, too.
I guess the problem has been that the MLB basically wasn't going to do anything about steroid abuse among their own players, and the perception is that this is somehow influencing young people into also getting into steroids. Anyway, that's the connection I'm drawing as to why these guys are sitting up there testifying. Other than that, the logic of the whole thing sort of astounds me.
After all, it's never been suggested the MLB is providing the players with steroids. It's never been suggested that MLB did much more than organize the leagues. If, in fact, there is some evidence that MLB is somehow providing people with steroids, does anyone really believe that the commissioners are going to break down just because the government is making thems it down at a table? I'm not really clear about what, exactly, people are trying to accomplish. If Congress is really this interested in the steroid issue in pro sports (which would affect maybe 20, 000 people, I would guess?), then isn't it the job of Congress to pass laws or something? And occasionally be dicks to each other about judicial appointments? I forget.
This has nothing to do with concerns about the public health. After all, most kids aren't going to Saturday night parties and being handed a syringe of steroids. Nothing is going to come out of this other than a lot of ruined ball-players careers. Especially when the public is mostly just shrugging the whole thing off and doesn't really seem to care. But they sure seem to be willing to read about it. This is about famous people being naughty, just like that nutty Paris Hilton. So, sure, it gets loads of coverage.
And why? Because our National Pasttime isn't baseball, it's watching celebrities go down in flames.
We might feel bad that some kids in high school may have been more predisposed to suicide because of the mood swings attributed to steroids, but by the time you've finished saying "mood swings attributed to steroids may have", you've already lost 80% of your audience. We're infinitely more interested to see if Hulk look-alike Mark McGwire is going to flip out under Big Brother's unblinking gaze and start smashing furniture with steroid freak super strength.
It takes baseball all freaking season to rev up this much drama.
I'll go out on a limb and say this: I don't care if baseball players are all out there using steroids. Don't care.
If Congress is really concerned about companies providing their cash cows with performance ehnancing drugs, they might want to check out how the recording industry and film industry work sometime. Not to mention that the only reason I stay in my job is that the university keeps me knee deep in free coffee.
Some bits and pieces:
Superman in Beaumont
Jim D. called me yesterday afternoon to inform me that the screenings of Superman I & II are ON in Beaumont. So, Leaguers, set your calendars for late July 2005. It will be A Very Special League Engagement.
I can't tell you how pumped I am about this. It sincerely feels like the world's greatest Christmas present. It's not enough that I get to spread the good word of Superman out to the masses via this lousy site... now I can spread the word to the greater Beaumont area using two of the greatest flicks ever made.
Anyway, get your flights booked, out of towners, this is going to be one huge Fiesta de Superman.
I think I feel a DITMTLOD coming on in regards to Ursa.
Wha..? I'm not ready..!
Apparently Batman Begins is coming out THIS SUMMER. For some reason I have long thought this was a Christmas movie. Anyway, in honor of the Caped Crusader's impending film appearance, I hope to do a big column on The League's lengthy ties to Batman.
With karate he'll kick your ass from here to right over there...
More Twirling!
According to multiple sources, including good ol' reliable CNN, Joss Whedon of Firefly, Serenity, Buffy and Angel (all of which i've never really seen) is taking on a feature film of Wonder Woman.
Joss is a real geek, and this gives me huge hope for this flick. He's an ace in casting, if the Buffy TV show is any indication. And his take on the X-men in the Astonishing X-Men is as refreshing as Grant Morrison's, so I know he knows hwo to treat this material.
I have high hopes that this is going to be a great flick, and will have girls running about willy-nilly with silver bracelets and red-starred tiaras.
Nathan & Renata
I am losing all sense of time. This weekend Jamie made a comment about Nathan and Renata's upcoming baby being due soon, and I said, "well, they have quite a while. They didn't know anything when they were out here."
To which, Jamie said, "yeah... that was in September."
To which, I replied, "No, it was in January."
It was in September. Apparently Chandler, AZ has made me lose any sense of time or place.
When will the Cone-baby arrive? I have no idea.
***UPDATE***
I have an idea of when the baby is due! It is due today!
Take a look at the comments section.
Superman in Beaumont
Jim D. called me yesterday afternoon to inform me that the screenings of Superman I & II are ON in Beaumont. So, Leaguers, set your calendars for late July 2005. It will be A Very Special League Engagement.
I can't tell you how pumped I am about this. It sincerely feels like the world's greatest Christmas present. It's not enough that I get to spread the good word of Superman out to the masses via this lousy site... now I can spread the word to the greater Beaumont area using two of the greatest flicks ever made.
Anyway, get your flights booked, out of towners, this is going to be one huge Fiesta de Superman.
I think I feel a DITMTLOD coming on in regards to Ursa.
Wha..? I'm not ready..!
Apparently Batman Begins is coming out THIS SUMMER. For some reason I have long thought this was a Christmas movie. Anyway, in honor of the Caped Crusader's impending film appearance, I hope to do a big column on The League's lengthy ties to Batman.
With karate he'll kick your ass from here to right over there...
More Twirling!
According to multiple sources, including good ol' reliable CNN, Joss Whedon of Firefly, Serenity, Buffy and Angel (all of which i've never really seen) is taking on a feature film of Wonder Woman.
Joss is a real geek, and this gives me huge hope for this flick. He's an ace in casting, if the Buffy TV show is any indication. And his take on the X-men in the Astonishing X-Men is as refreshing as Grant Morrison's, so I know he knows hwo to treat this material.
I have high hopes that this is going to be a great flick, and will have girls running about willy-nilly with silver bracelets and red-starred tiaras.
Nathan & Renata
I am losing all sense of time. This weekend Jamie made a comment about Nathan and Renata's upcoming baby being due soon, and I said, "well, they have quite a while. They didn't know anything when they were out here."
To which, Jamie said, "yeah... that was in September."
To which, I replied, "No, it was in January."
It was in September. Apparently Chandler, AZ has made me lose any sense of time or place.
When will the Cone-baby arrive? I have no idea.
***UPDATE***
I have an idea of when the baby is due! It is due today!
Take a look at the comments section.
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