Friday, March 17, 2006

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO STEANSO
Part Deux

Today Steanso turns 33. I have not yet sent him a present thanks to a weird combination of events and the fact that I have a new policy of refusing to send a present unless I have been given a decent idea of what the presentee might want.

Well, Steanso, your present is now sitting on the floor of my office. You'll get it when I locate a box and get to the post office.

I am sure you will, once again, make the most of another year here on Planet Earth and bring the smallest amount of shame to our family name as you can muster.

I know this year had been frought with challenges. The loss of a job and subsequent selling out for benefits and job security. The loss of Hobbes. The Steanso-v.-Satellite Television battle. Your shameful bout with illiteracy. The restraining order. Your epic battle with E.D.

But you made it through it all with flying colors. And we expect you'll do it all again and with your usual panache.

You're more or less my brother, and while I wouldn't normally claim you, we look enough alike that the resemblance makes it hard to deny any accusations of shared parentage. And so I guess I just want the world to know that, here, on your 33rd Birthday, you're not the total disgrace Mom always insists that you are. And no matter what she says, people can overlook the fact that you smell like an old bag of Doritos.

So Happy Birthday, Steanso. Again, my gift to you is my full support that one day you will, if you're lucky, kiss a girl.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

LAUNCHING COUSIN JIM INTO SPACE


So do you remember how I was complaining that we've lost our nerve when it comes to discovery, especially in aviation?

Well, Cousin Jim (not to be confused with Jim D.) has inadvertently decided to challenge me on my disappointment in humanity. He, himself, is an aviator, and just today decided to send me some information of a venture he's considering.

THE ROCKET RACING LEAGUE

This, Leaguers, is exactly the salve to my woes. This was what I needed to see, people with more courage than common sense tearing through the stratosphere.

If Cousin Jim decides this is what he's doing, Leaguers, I will find some way to get involved. I am sending Jim into space with high hopes of bringing him back.

I suggest visiting the website as it also has a contest to name the first Rocket Racer. I submitted "The Bradbury" because I am a nerd.
Happy Birthday to Steanso
Part the First

Steanso's birthday isn't until the 17th, but what the heck.

In honor of his birthday, here is a picture of Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica.




Let's all hope that as Steanso enters his 33rd year, this is the year he finally kisses a girl.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Nominations are now being accepted for the 2006 Mellies
We'd be delighted to have you participate. Nominations will end on March 15th, 2006. For official guidelines, go here.
CRACK JAMS OUT IN AUSTIN

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Parents and In-Laws

Well, boy howdy.

This weekend The League's parents and The League's In-Laws arrived. And The League is now a very tired League.

We did NOT go to Ostrich Fest. After 140 rainless days, it rained all day on Saturday. Literally, from when i woke around 7:30 until when I went to bed at 11:00, it rained. So no Village People for us.

Sunday we tried to go to Ostrich Fest, but someone decided the all dirt parking lot wasn't dry enough, and that nobody could park at the Ostrich Fest. So, maybe 150 yards away we could see all the rides whilring and twirling, but completely empty. And all 6 of us were packed into a Mazda 5, just stuck.

The gomer in charge of traffic redirected us to the Community College parking lot directly across from our neighborhood, where we would have been one of the first 150 or so cars to arrive. The line, however, reflected the carloads of people form the first batch of cars. The teen-age kid directing traffic informed us "the" shuttle (I assume meaning one) would be by in 20 minutes. Quickly doing the math that the first shuttle hadn't yet arrived, and that there was a mile long line headed into the Ostrich Fest (where people would be told there was no parking) led me to believe it could take up to two hours just to get to the Ostrich Fest. Let alone depart in the evening.

Anyhoo, no Ostrich Fest.

We did go see the movie, "The World's Fastest Indian" which I plan to review at some point over at Nanostalgia.com.

Sunday the MEN jumped in The Admiral's pimpin' rented white Taurus and headed to Tucson to visit the Pima Air and Space Museum. Leaguer's, you wouldn't think Tucson would be much of place for a museum, but aviation and electronics development are big business down there, and it's reflected in the sprawling complex with hundreds of planes on site.

A brief list of what's on hand of note

SR-71 Blackbird
A-10
A-6
F-15
F-14
F-102
F-104
F-111 (a big thrill as I had a poster of one of these and a B-1 when I was in middle school)
F-4
F-4U Corsair
Super Guppy
three presidential planes, including a prop plane used by Kennedy and Johnson which we got to tour
three B-52's
B-29
B-17
B-26
T-38
C-130

and a B-36 which was being restored.

Very nice day.

Two items struck me as we toured the museum:

1) I was reading the plaques near each plane and noticing the dates of development and use for planes. We are no longer living in an era of wild progress. We've given up the pioneering spirit of discovery and invention for multiple redundant safety systems and iPods. I am certain new planes are being developed, but it's impossible in this age to imagine so much innovation occuring simultaneously as companies rush to create perfection in flight once again. Faster processors? Check. Bigger TV's, check. Feasible mission to Mars or Moon Colony? uhhhh

The SR-71, able to travel Mach 3 at a ceiling of 80,000 feet (that's as much as has been declassified) is now sitting there collecting dust while we let satellites do the work. The SR-71 was developed more than 10 years before I was born.

You have to think there's value to the development of such aircraft. And moreover, there's got to be value to the world in knowing that development of faster and better aircraft is possible, if, for no other reason, than to spark the imagination. What value does a 747 have to kids growing up today? It's a bus that flies. I am sure there's a highly classified follow-up to the SR-71 (just as it took a while for us to learn about the B-2). But the era of innovation, of multiple new jets entering the skies each year and seeing what can be done... that era is over. Give us our repairs on our 737 and begone with you.

The museum sat close to he local Air Force base, and it's a hell of a thing to watch a C-130 doing touch-and-goes, and to see people training in an A-10.

2) The other thing to see, the thing that's heartbreaking, was to first walk through Hangars 3 and 4 and see the bombers from World War II and look inside. As magnificent as the planes are fromt eh outside, on the inside it's all sheet metal and wire. You forget watching these things in the movies that it's a 1/8th of an inch of metal that stood between the crew and flak, metal that looks like it would peel away with a good hit from the claw of a hammer.

Looking into the B-17 (beautifully restored and housed in a special hangar/ museum dedicated to the 390th) reveals a cramped and confined space with wooden platforms for walking or sitting, and areas exposed directly to the elements. And this is what we used to bomb Berlin.

Anyway, once every few years I get a chance to hit an aviation museum, and this may have been the best one I've toured since the Smithsonian's Aviation Annex.

And... today...

Cubs fans poured into Mesa, AZ for a Spring Training match between the Seattle Mariners and the Chicago Cubs. In my old age basebell is finally growing on me. I'm no longer too ADD to sit for 3 hours and appreciate a game as it unfolds.

Unfortunately I didn't keep up with the Cubs last year, so I have no idea who any of the players are anymore. They appear to need some work, but they did get a few runs in.

I love baseball crowds. Everybody comes out to see baseball. And to sit in a park where you're closer to the pitcher than the outfielders if fantastic. Terrific afternoon.

Anyhoo, Doug comes in tomorrow evening.

Get your Mellie Nominations in.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Possible Hiatus! Get your Mellie Noms in!

Hey, Leaguers! Here's my schedule for the next week:

Tonight, my in-laws are here.
Tomorrow, my parents are here.
Wednesday, I think everybody leaves.
Wednesday night, Doug and K arrive
And, I assume, they're leaving at some point.

So, anyhoo, I just realized my time spent in the wild world of blogging will probably be nil for about a week.

You guys are on your own.

In the meantime, send in your Mellie noms. If you're Steanso and you thought it was okay to send in one word answers, try again.

We'll be back as events warrant. In the meantime, go over to Nanostalgia.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Report From K-ZOO, MI
I know you were wondering how our man in Kalamazoo is doing. Arden is, apparently, big into citrus. Which is good. That's calcium for his growing bones.


Arden and an unknown companion enjoy half of a grapefruit

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Orson Welles: Dark Knight Detective

Check it out. Shoemaker sends an article from a few years ago by comic scribe Mark (Ultimates) Millar.

I knew that American icon Orson Welles had once portrayed "The Shadow" on a radio show, but I wasn't aware that at one point Welles had been in development on a "Batman" movie.

Read more here.

This sounds totally amazing, if true. I'd never heard this before, and I've seen no evidence any other place. But, what the hell... I choose to believe it because it sounds pretty kick-ass.
Shall we to Ostrich Fest?

It's the 18th Annual Ostrich Fest here in Chandler, AZ this weekend. Completely unrelated, I've got both Jamie's folks en route, but the Admiral and KareBear shall be here on Saturday. That's a lot of parents by anybody's count.

So, realizing I shall have to entertain a lot of grown-ups, I am wondering, do I take them to the Ostrich Festival? After all

Friday night's entertainment is... JOAN JETT AND THE BLACKHEARTS (and you know what, Leaguers..? I DO love rock 'n roll).

Saturday: The Village People and The Little River Band.

Sunday: CHARO!!!! Yes, Charo shall be gracing our fair little hamlet with her oversized... uh, personality. Huzzah! It's Charo.

Who knows what mysteries await us this weekend? I really, really have to think of someway to entertain the parents before The Moms get into some kind of knife fight or parenting stand-off.

I dunno. I'm considering taking the four of them out to the desert and letting them try out the whole survivalist thing.
Former Beatle to save monkeys in Chandler?

Dolph sends this article.

I, for one, would like to think no monkeys will be injured in the making of this suburb.

Look, what am i supposed to say? I like people jabbing monkeys? I don't want bigger and better medicines approved and distributed?

This is a pickle, people. A pickle.

Now, I'm actually pretty anti-animal testing for cosmetic products. I see no reason to shove makeup in a bunny's eye at this late stage to see if it will be a problem. Have you SEEN the make-up aisle at Target? You can't get that many different colors of red if you spent all day mixing paint at Home Depot. We're done. No new lipstick colors.

Anyhow, I'll be curious to see how this pans out. I'm really excited about the prospect of running into Sir Paul at the grocery.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

The Year of Superman

Hey, at League of Melbotis, every year is the year of Superman. But at Warner Bros. they've gone ahead and made it official for 2006.

Check out the new website

The site features a great montage of clips from various incarnations of Superman in film and in the movies as well as information of the upcoming film "Superman Returns" and all of the DVD sets coming out.

The League has a lot of catching up to do.
Power Girl

Somebody put together a Power Girl fan film. You can watch it here.


These guys need a much better editor, or better coverage or a better sense of timing or something. The video itself isn't all that great, but for those of us who've long found Power Girl charming, the video is kind of funny.

If nothing else, you get to see what Power Girl would look like in real life. Extra kudos to the actress playing Karen for:

a) wearing the Power Girl costume and not looking embarassed
b) wearing the costume in what looks like several inches of snow (if you skip tot he end)

Extra points to the video for including Beetle and Booster, and, I assume, Black Canary.

I hadn't thought much about it before, but the recent Power Girl run in JSA: Classified pitches Kara as a good character to be spun off into her own movie or TV series. Well, maybe not the story, but the attitude is right. She's very girl-friendly as the "I'm really, really good at being a super-hero, but in everything else I do, I am a complete wreck." And boys would lihke her because she wears tights and she's bullet proof.


Anyhoo, hurray for Power Girl for getting a fan movie made, even if the creators needed to spend more time in post production.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Godspeed, Dana.

Dana Reeve, wife of actor and activist Christopher Reeve, has died of lung cancer.

Read more here.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Race From the Oscars

You can read my amazingly insightful commentary on the Oscars here.
Birthday Madness

Here's a link to Steanso's blog. See KareBear and The Admiral in action as my mother gets hosed, arms herself with a sword and dons a large hat.

Go now.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Weekending, March 5th.

This weekend marked my mother's big birthday. Jamie and I did not attend as my folks and Jamie's folks will be here next week. I hope her birthday was a good one.

Friday night we headed out to Mesa, just north of Chandler to see a band at a coffee house. Asleep in the Sea rocked most of the coffee house. But, because this is PHX, the show was cut short. Cheba Hut, a local stoner-themed sandwich shop chain was next door. Apparently the rocking and rolling was disturbing the patrons of the coffee shop, so there were exasperated sandwich shop and coffee shop employees causing a fuss during the brief set. And I thought the whole thing about being a stoner was that you were supposed to be mellow... You stoners sit on a throne of lies.

For whatever reason I was wearing my Superman shirt at the show, and was approached by a very, very drunk gentleman who explained that he was a wizard, mumbled something about his wife, daughter and the Mormon Church, something about "the seventeenth is big (bleep) day", then did some tai-chi. I suddenly remembered why I used to like going out.

A short while later, a middle-aged lady and her teen-aged son came by and the nice lady engaged me in a conversation about Superman comic books. Apparently she's been collecting since the early 60's and has vast runs of several series. I was quite jealous.

Still, once the band was done they turned on ugly overhead lights which is sort of the universal sign in a nightspot for "get out". It was only 9:10ish. On a Friday night. At a coffeeshop.

For those of you who like to tell The League that he needs to find the good out here in the desert, please understand that there is a pattern we've picked up here. Fun cannot last past the hour of 9:00pm.

So we ended up at The Village Inn near our house, a place I only like to go to when I'm feeling sort of Marge, and I had a bowl of soup and tried hard not to think too much about the alt-rock guys running the coffee shop being pissy about rocking too loud and too late into the night.

The freezer in our old fridge gave up the ghost some time ago. This week it started to smell badly. So badly, in fact, that the smell went out into the fridge as well, contaminating food that was not vaccuum-sealed. So we went and got the new fridge. Peabo, my friend, I never made it to Home Depot. Sears was running the same deal as Home Depot and Jamie had identified the fridge of her dreams.

Ice maker with ice holder in the door (more freezer space). Crushed ice or cubed. Pur water filtration system for both water and ice. Clear plastic shelving. Moveable shelves... Yes, it was a middle-class consumer's dream.

The guys showed up literally five minutes before the end of their 10:30 to 12:30 window. They took out the old fridge (leaving the filter in our front yard, I might add), brought in the new fridge which was not the correct fridge, removed the wrong fridge, wheeled in the new fridge, connectyed it and then broke the water main into our house, elaving us without water. Pretty cool. So we called Sun Devil Plumbers and Carl not only fixed the problem, but put a new valve on our main that had a swing arm valve rather than a stem. Hurray!

I did not tip the delivery guys who ended up setting me back more than $100. They did tell me "that's a million to one, that happening." Well, lucky me. I should have played the Lotto this week.

I also watched "Smokey and the Bandit" this weekend. I hadn't seen it since I was very little. Almost all of Jackie Gleason's lines were overdubbed, so I don't know if he was cursing or making racial epithets or what. I am not clear as to what the point of the movie was, but it's a flashback to a part of American culture that seems to have fallen by the wayside. At least it doesn't exist in any tangible form in AZ.

Tonight are the Academy Awards. Jamie will watch. I will be organizing comics. The League cares not for fancy dresses. He also saw only a smattering of the nominated movies and thinks it's silly to give awards to movies and actors. At least we think it's silly when movies like Gosford Park which were not very interesting, or original and were made-up as the movie went along win for "Best Screenplay".

But, we know you people love the Awards shows, so go to town on your Oscars. We do not hold it against you.

Saturday, March 04, 2006



From the upcoming series 52

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Greetings, Loyal Leaguers.

I haven't been posting much as there's not been much on my plate I felt was worthy of discussion. Not that complete boredom has been a deterrent in the past, but I just haven't had the energy. Plus, I've been watching gobs of porn.

Little joke there, Judy.

The Mellies results are coming in. I don't know if it's the group of Leaguers sending in answers this year or what, but the responses are a pretty colorful bag. I'm expecting the results to be content fodder for about a week, which is great, because lately, Leaguers, I've got nothing.

I think I've now got 7 responses, including two from people with whome I do not believe I've ever had any previous correspondence. It's that sort of effort, Tamara and Natalie, that makes it all worthwhile. I'm trying to get Steanso to revise his responses as he sent in only one word answers. Dedman will surely make something of that. One word responses are not really in the spirit of the whole thing. We need your comments and criticisms up here in black and blue, and we want a little explanation.

That said, other Loyal Leaguers (such as my wife) have as of yet to respond. Nathan has been curiously silent. Where are these Leaguers? Where is Shoemaker? Where is Harms?

Oh, and a special note for Jim D., RHPT has sent in his responses. And he managed to do it without writing a novel (ahem).

KareBear's big birthday is just around the corner, so I'm also losing precious blogging time working on a much requested gift. The League has been asked to create some work of art for KareBear. Well, The League was getting close to completion on Tuesday night when we totally screwed up what we were doing, and now we're trying to figure out if we should start over or try to salvage the piece by turning it into something different. Only time will tell.

Our refrigerator's ice machine died this fall, and being poor, we could not afford to fix it, nor could we get a new fridge. Now the ice machine is giving off a foul odor that is omnipresent in the freezer as well as in the fridge. The smell is in the food. It's in the g-d food. Now I gotta go get a new damn fridge. And refrigerators aren't cheap, Leaguers. Not with an ice machine and water filter. Well, I am fairly certain the fridge left by the previous occupants of this house is VERY cheap, but I am going to be looking for a more robust design and a 3 year warranty on anything I buy.

The best part is, now I get to go to Sears and have somebody spend like an hour telling me about the benefits of a wide variety of refrigerators. This is a topic I have never once before pondered. It's a brave new world for The League.

Oh, and I've asked Jamie for a word to update you regarding her pneumonia. She says "Hack-cack". Nice.

I don't have any idea if she's feeling better or not. "I never really felt sick. I just kind of felt fevery," she says, reading over my shoulder. "It's great having everything I say documented," she adds.

Now she is curiously silent... "How to get your wife to shut up. Oh GOD! STOP!" She insists with just a hint of Erica Foster in her voice.

Again... the horrible silence.

She pats me on the head like I'm Mel. It is nice. Until she points out a type-o which I fix. There is much sighing and rolling of eyes. Now a rapid departure and an addendum. "How to get your wife to leave..."

She is eating ice. And now she's gone.

I think that's all for today, Leaguers.

Keep it real.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Arrested Development to Showtime?

It's a rumor! And that's good enough for The League. Read here.

The irony of this, of course, is that we just got rid of like 15 movie channels. Just when you think you're out...

Mr. F!