Wednesday, August 27, 2008

The League Revisits: Pump Up the Volume (and DITMTLOD)

In 1990 the Steans Clan packed up our stuff and moved from Austin to Houston. The Admiral had transferred to what turned out to be a pretty good job. Like a lot of high schoolers, I was less than thrilled to change schools. I'd already put in the leg work with three years of middle school and a year of high school with the people I'd expected to endure until I escaped to college. Now I'd have to start all over again.

What would be odd, as per my living situation, was that we were leaving Jason behind in Austin. It was sort of like deciding the family dog was too old and wouldn't like the new arrangement, so you leave it with the neighbors. He was to finish out his Senior year rather than slog through a new school just in time to graduate.

Shortly after we arrived in Houston, the newest Christian Slater flick "Pump up the Volume" made its way to the Loew's theater a few miles from the house, right by the blimp hanger. It piqued my interest for two reasons (a) I was a big fan of "Heathers", and (b) it featured Pirate Radio.

Jason had spent some time in prior years trying to figure out how to set up a pirate radio broadcast out of his bedroom. Eventually, he abandoned the idea, I think due to legal concerns (not wanting to go to jail).

At the time, I loved the movie. It had teenagers talking about teen-agery type stuff. It had a pirate radio station. Christian Slater stuck it to The Man (ie: the crusty principal), and mostly, circa 1990 Samantha Mathis.


Oh, Samantha Mathis, your art-school girl chic made my heart pitter-patter

"Pump up the Volume" may or may not have been the original name for the movie. But it's a terrible title and suggests a late 80's break dancing movie. I have suspicions this was some MC Hammer-inspired tweaking when someone from marketing realized that they were marketing a movie to teens that didn't feature music that it was, at the time, perceived that teens listened to.

The soundtrack features Concrete Blonde, Leonard Cohen (I think), the Pixies and others of the late 80's, early 90's, pre-Nirvana music scene, and starts by establishing Slater's character's cred with his record collection. All on cassette. Because I think in 1990, I knew one person with an actual CD player.

The movie, really, hinges on technology and the Newsweek-covered hot button parental issues of the era. Today's teens would see a neolithic world before cell phones, internet lines, and when teenagers with their own computers were a pretty darn rare commodity. Only one character has a computer in their room during the course of the movie (and he dies!).

Re-made today, no doubt the idea would basically be a well-run website with illegally distributed MP3's, a chat room, some e-mail, and podcasts of Mr. HHH. At the time, the idea of just anybody taking to the airwaves was considered extremely difficult and illegal. (I should pause here to give a mad shout out to the 1993-1994 residents of Jester West, 12th floor. Patrick and Jeff put together a small radio broadcaster from scrap parts and their TV antenna. Jester briefly enjoyed the rockin' tunes of Jester Pirate Radio. Until, that is, we wanted to watch TV again. And, yeah, they let me on the air once or twice. And I was awesome.)

The hot button issues of the day were teen pregnancy and teen suicide. The suicide angle kind of also explains the entirety of "Heathers", and the tune from Heathers: Big Fun's "Teenage Suicide (Don't Do It)". Anyhoo, the switch to the real drama of the movie occurs when some kid kills himself because Slater didn't tell him not to. The witch-hunting overreaction by parents as part of the sequence is still actually pretty darn accurate.

As a 33 year old watching this movie, one winds up feeling less like Christian Slater is speaking for you (or anyone). It comes across more as a lot of teen angsting, talking about how the whole world is screwed up and needs change, but there aren't a lot of specifics regarding what needs changing. Slater eventually winds up spouting this really crazy diatribe about how the earth and trees need healing... and uncensored pirate radio, I guess.

None of it really makes a lot of sense, unless you consider Slater's character was just moved from NYC to what was a stand in for Paradise Valley, Arizona circa 1990. In which case, the dissatisfaction is all too rational.

In order to provide the audience with an actual antagonist that isn't just Slater V. Society-at-Large, there's a cockamamie scheme cooked up in which the Principal is magically expelling teenagers with lower SAT scores so she can keep up some sort of public funding for the school. It's a little convoluted, and really tangential to whatever is supposed to be going on with Slater's pirate radio show. And suggests that this is a school in which no parents are involved, and nobody fears a lawsuit.

Probably the two weirdest moments in the movie belong to Samantha Mathis, whose character suddenly goes topless in one scene (something I cheered during my first viewing as I believed the movie to be PG-13). And, as a plot point, we learn she's failing high school math. Which... is unintentionally hilarious.

Failing math = Not terribly attractive

The movie is oddly ham-handed in other ways.

-Hip-hop is used as a sign that the kids are getting too rebellious for the likes of the ever-crusty faculty.

-Slater's character drops a half-dozen clues that would immediately identify him as HHH. Mr. Magoo could unravel the mystery.

-And there's a lot of insinuations that (a) this is the least happy bunch of privileged kids EVER, and (b) something is very, very wrong at Harding High, but they manage to make it through the 102 minute runtime without ever saying WHAT is wrong.

In many ways, I'm left peppering the movie with the same "What?" that I usually reserve for movies like "D War Dragon Wars".

The ending is absolutely ludicrous, with Slater and Mathis hauled off in a paddywagon, sure to go to jail for some vague moral victory. I'd worry more about her future, but with that "F" in Math, I'm not sure that Mathis's character couldn't use the focused environment of prison in which to get her GED.

And, of course, a million kids supposedly take to the airwaves with their own pirate radio shows... The end

The Internet has, of course, taught us what teenagers and adults will do with a public forum. If this blog is any indication, it hasn't healed the rocks and trees, and its mostly given nutjobs like myself a bull pulpit from which we can espouse our half-baked sasquatch theories.



Still, it's got Samantha Mathis.


This look of loving concern at our hero's exploits is the opposite of what I was used to from the ladies of KOHS. Change this more to a look of disapproval.

A brief DITMLOD: Samantha Mathis as "Nora Diniro"

I'm not ashamed to admit that in middle and high school, I had my eye on the stripey sock girls. Give me a girl in an over-sized black sweater and clunky black shoes, and any young lady automatically got a second look (this predates all the Marilyn Manson co-option of the art-school girl stuff, which... doesn't work so much for me).

The look showed up in a few movies. Sort of sported by Winona Ryder in "Heathers". Absolutely seen by the female lead in cult classic "Three O'Clock High". But I still think Mathis does it best.

Despite 13 long years of loyalty, Jamie seems to get a little jealous whenever this previous fascination is brought up. I think Jason initially revealed my old achilles heal to Jamie, and every once in a while it becomes a point of contention that I did not fancy Jamie before I had, in fact, met Jamie.

Whatever. Jamie loves 1988 Greg Louganis.

Anyhoo, yes. As a teenager I thought Samantha Mathis was the bee's knees. She was cute, did the stripey sock thing very well, was occasionally topless, and, to a kid who'd just moved and went weeks in a new school without talking to anyone... the idea that such a girl was hiding under a rock somewhere at KOHS was deeply appealing.

That is not to say that KOHS was devoid of awesome ladies (you know who you are). But, you know, we were sadly lacking in Samantha Mathisii.

I should of just learned that the girls who smoked behind the school at lunch were more fun...

Anyway.

I salute thee, Samantha Mathis as "Nora Diniro". You left an indelible impression upon my youthful psyche.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Superman Genesis not all "Gee-Whiz"?

I appreciate the folks who sent me the article on the Siegel family which ran today.

To summarize, its an article about how its recently come to light that Superman creator Jerry Siegel's father died during a robbery at his shop prior to the creation of Superman. Armchair psychology suggests that perhaps this event was the catalyst for the creation of The Man of Steel.


Here's a link to that article.


I have no idea what Siegel and Shuster were thinking during the years when they were working on their cartoon ideas (of which there are many which survive). Most of what I know about the actual origins of Superman and Siegel and Shuster comes from the Gerard Jones book "Men of Tomorrow", which I've referenced here once or twice.

It seems that novelist AND comic writer Brad Meltzer is releasing a novel in which the events of Siegel's father's death play a central role. And as Meltzer tends to sell a heck of a lot of novels, USA today and others are picking up on the theme in his latest novel "The Book of Lies" (due next month).

I do think that making the equation of "untimely death of father + desire to see justice = birth of Superman" is a pretty gross oversimplification. But its also exactly the sort of story that the general populace would rather hear than the long held (and oft derided opinion) that Siegel and Shuster were high school losers who needed some form of escapism from their nerd-status, and so fantasized about an alter ego which would make the ladies swoon.

It's been the latter interpretation that's made the rounds in columns and lists of "dumbest superheroes" (Googling "Superman lame" brings up 1.3 million sites) that has dogged Superman in the post Dark Knight Returns era. The character was seen as a weak man's fantasy stand-in, and that somehow made character, creators and fans of the character seem dopey. How this applies to Superman, but not to any other character... I have no idea, but that's been the general consensus.


Superman deals with yet another citizen who let their tags expire

The somewhat abstract armageddon of Superman's origin hasn't held up as well as the gripping visceral and personal tragedy of Batman's origins, and for twenty years it's been fairly regularly that Superman takes a pounding for his lack of murder in his origin (always an odd one, to me. Especially with billions of dead Kryptonians, etc...). So it'll be interesting to see how or if the true tragedy of the character's creator and champion will carry any weight going forward.

Writers with a psych class or two under their belt may not be so quick to dismiss the character as a nerdy kid's fantasy for landing girls, but will now read into the character all sorts of new stuff with the information at hand. (insert tiny, unenthusiastic "hooray..." here)

All of that has always been a gross oversimplification of Superman's origin. He was the product of two kids (young men by the time Superman was finally published in its more-or-less current form) who did what most people do when creating something new: they begged, borrowed and stole from other popular science-fiction and fantasy of the day of which they'd been fans for years. Doc Savage, Amazing Stories Magazine, strong men such as Charles Atlas, and everything in between.

They were fanboys before the term was coined, trying to break into a medium that was not an atypical aspiration at the time, just as young people now all want to major in film.

What's forgotten is that Siegel also produced characters like The Spectre, who make Batman's exploits look like child's play. And, by the way, Dr. Occult, whom I once saw cited as "the first costumed hero". Siegel was also responsible for humor strips, and worked a lot of comedy into Superman from the first issue. And, he preceeded Superman with the recently revived tough-guy, Slam Bradley (derivative of Dick Tracy, etc...).

That all said:

I'm not sure Siegel created Superman out of tragedy. I'm not dismissing the idea, but I can't possibly know one way or another, and I'm not sure if its fair to believe that's the case just because it seems somewhat romantic and/ or works with our understand of psychology gleaned from seeing Dr. Phil.

I do know that Siegel never saw Superman as an avenging character from the first issue. Rather, Superman was there to stop harm from occurring, whereas Batman was the detective on the trail of clues, bringing murderers and thieves to justice after the mess was already made (but you'd have to ask Bill Finger and Bob Kane about all that).

Whatever anger might have been there was turned into a more hopeful wish fulfillment, possibly. That rather than asking someone like Batman to pick up the pieces afterward, the Man of Steel had been there to save the day.

And that's not necessarily a bad thing. Both kids and adults should know that heroes aren't just people who show up after the fact. Sometimes they're the guys who step in first to make sure the bad stuff either doesn't happen, or never gets too bad. Maybe Siegel's real life experience taught him that what people really want in the face of tragedy is for something to save the day. And that's something all superheroes do when they're at their best. And that's kind of the point...

Monday, August 25, 2008

Video Playlist

I don't really have anything to write about this evening, which usually means I wind up writing some overly long post that's pretty specific.
Not tonight, I don't think.

Editor's Update! I felt bad about not posting. So here's my video playlist

To get your day started the right way:
Dan Deacon - Crystal Cat (Alamo attendees will recognize the song)




Because I'm the guy who is buying the Dresden Dolls albums...
Dresden Dolls - Coin Operated Boy



over-produced, 80's-referencing music is a good idea
LCD Soundsystem - All My Friends



I'm supposed to find the bass tab for this song
Radiohead - Karma Police



Your morning needs more 90's
My Bloody Valentine - To Here Knows When

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Jamie Doing Pretty Well

Hey, ya'll...

Jamie was in the hospital for a procedure on Friday, as I mentioned. She'd not been feeling real well for a week or so before that.

But, it looks like the procedure did the trick (knock on wood). Jamie's back to her usual hard-drinkin', ass-whoopin' self, and is seemingly running on all cylinders again.

Thanks for the e-mails and whatnot over the weekend. It means a lot to us.

Plus, an extra special thanks to Jamie's folks for their role as support staff.

I can say that after 4 years of us doing this mostly on our own in Arizona, having family around for support, and family & friends offering up any help they can, and Nicole calling, literally, minutes after the procedure to check in... well, its just a lot easier for everyone concerned. So, again... thanks to all.

NBC's Coverage of the Olympics

Firstly, congrats to the US Women's basketball and 4x400 relay. Both won gold in their respective concluding matches.

Sanya Richards' final leg on that relay was one for the ages.



Also, Rogers and Dallhauser for that beach volleyball win the other night. I was concerned during that second set, but they went crazy in the third.

I usually run pretty critical here, but I want to take a moment for a tip of the hat to NBC/ Universal for their coverage of the Olympics. Especially in the last week.

I may not always love their commentators, but NBC has fully taken advantage of the 13 hour delay to really deliver on condensed coverage, especially of Track & Field. I want to see who wins high jump and long jump, but I don't want to watch all fifteen rounds. Highlights will work. So they've done a great job of taking, say, the last few rounds of high jump and inserting them into the middle of the 5000m race, etc... then cutting back to the 5000m for the conclusion.

Now, NBC needs to apply that "cutting down" tactic to Diving. Gymnastics, which is usually what makes me want to claw my eyes out by the second night (team, all-around, individual...? Its the same people doing the same crap three times..!), was cut into useful, bite-sized chunks. I never just walked away from the games due to too much gymnastics. But diving...

One huge programming suggestion for London?

Fact: Diving is boring.
It's repetitive, and occurs in, like, 1 second. Slowing it down doesn't make it better. And NBC showed a lot of it, took up hours of primetime broadcast, but showed nothing in the way of:
Javelin, discus, hammer-throw, and a lot of other sports.
Fact: Showing every round of diving does not make it more exciting.

Anyway...

Costas has administered his usual fair but enthusiastic hand to his role as the US host to the Olympics.

Add in multiple channels covering various sports, mostly cut for time and highlights, and its made for, honestly, TOO MUCH engaging TV. I've done nothing these last few weeks but watch sports. It's insanity.

Leaguers, thanks to my self-limiting exposure, I have watched everything from Synchronized Swimming to Rhythmic Gymnastics without a 100% dedication to snark. And let me tell you, Synchronized Swimming is one of the craziest things you're bound to see in this life or any other. My mind is blown.

NBC also managed to land uninterrupted coverage (no commercials) of a lot of the Gold Medal finals in sports like Beach Volleyball... so I tip my hat to NBC.

Way to go Costas and Co.

But...

With the buzz of excitement over the success of US athletes, it seems that we sometimes forget about anyone but the winners. Sure, we salute Usain Bolt when he wins his medals and breaks world records (and that's a lot of what the Olympics are about, after all), but NBC missed some of the other stories.

For example, this runner from Somalia, who came in dead last but received a standing ovation.

Surely this runner was not alone. I watched the opening ceremonies. There were dozens of countries with just a handful of athletes, few of whom had a chance of winning a medal, but who had somehow made it to Beijing. And, in no condescending way... that's a victory

Or athletes whose culture wasn't necessarily conducive to competing, but won their heat, anyway such asthe female sprinter from Bahrain, who ran in a hijab? (That lady is my new hero...)

Or that China has arrested multiple US Citizens for protesting for Human Rights (if only for ten days...)

Unpleasant though it might be, China's human rights record is far from good. And, yeah, Costas and NBC might have stood a chance of getting bounced out of Beijing, or even thrown in jail, for covering any protests... But isn't that sort of the point when you have a chance to cover this stuff? Wouldn't Costas in jail for mentioning the protests themselves give America a little bit of an idea as to how our favorite trade partner is running their ship?

But the focus is on winning. Not just winning a medal, but receiving a GOLD medal. Silver and Bronze medalists were still being asked if they felt disappointed. The victory inherent in just being able to participate is given lip service, but is very clearly not how interviewers and ESPECIALLY color commentators actually feel. They can't help but talk about how an athlete who makes a mistake is simply letting everyone down.

There's nothing wrong with celebrating victory, but, seriously, get a grip. Being the second or third best sprinter, pole vaulter, what-have-you in THE WORLD is no mean feat. Sometimes you can just say "Hey! Bronze medal! You've gotta like that!" And if they want to express their disappointment, goody.

If the Olympics are really about all the nations coming together in the spirit of friendly competition, then it seems like NBC could do a bit more to promote that international flair. And that story is not limited to winners. Or Americans. Or putting a polish on the very real world occurring all around the games. By ignoring the world, in many ways, its reducing the impact of what it means for athletes to come together in the most idealized version of the Olympic spirit.

The fact is, there's so, so much happening at the Olympics, and so many narrative arcs, that I don't know if NBC/ Universal touches on 1% of the narratives really going on. You follow the Decathalon, so you miss women's soccer. And you focus on a "sure thing" like Lolo Jones, and wind up with one of the most heartbreaking moments of the games. You focus on the amazing Phelps, but you wind up missing out on the story of the thousands of other athletes... That's the way it goes.

Ah, well. We'll see how we fair with the games in London. More Olympics reporting from League of Melbotis in 2012.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Warner Bros. to Re-Jigger Superman Movies?

Apparently with Jamie in the hospital and whatnot, I missed a story that spread on friday.

And I have to give mad props to Randy. He sent me an article on this topic, and I poo-poo'd the whole thing, believing that this was yet another rumor come to the surface. But, Leaguers, this looks pretty solid, as far as these things go. So give it up for Randy, who often sends stuff my way, and I all too often shrug it off.

So, it appears WB is probably scrapping any "continuity" established by "Superman Returns" and moving forward with an all-new Superman movie next year.


Here's the Wall Street Journal article
.

It'll help if you read the whole thing to get some context. It's short, and well be here when you get back.

Here are the paragraphs that have comic nerds all up in a lather:

Like the recent Batman sequel -- which has become the highest-grossing film of the year thus far -- Mr. Robinov wants his next pack of superhero movies to be bathed in the same brooding tone as "The Dark Knight." Creatively, he sees exploring the evil side to characters as the key to unlocking some of Warner Bros.' DC properties. "We're going to try to go dark to the extent that the characters allow it," he says. That goes for the company's Superman franchise as well.

The studio is set to announce its plans for future DC movies in the next month. For now, though, it is focused on releasing four comic-book films in the next three years, including a third Batman film, a new film reintroducing Superman, and two movies focusing on other DC Comics characters. Movies featuring Green Lantern, Flash, Green Arrow, and Wonder Woman are all in active development.


I think its necessary here to take a step back and point out a few things:

-the writing was on the wall for Singer's ousting pretty much after opening night when I noted the cinema I went to had reduced the number of screens from 2 to 1 for "Superman Returns"
-WB has been publicly soliciting Superman scripts for what seems like 2 or 3 months. And privately before that. That's not Hollywood speak for "Singer's our guy!"
-reporters seem to take misinterpreting comics and comic movie information as a point of pride. I'd be pretty suspicious of anything said at all in this article.
-for example, I sincerely doubt WB intends for Superman to become evil, but I imagine they have plans for darker bad guys for the Man of Steel (ie: Doomsday)
-Mr. Robinov's beliefs regarding what he thinks will work as it stands today could change with the wind tomorrow. This capriciousness is the hallmark of the studio exec.
-I think what Robinov might have meant, rather than suggesting DC's heroes will be eeee-vil, is that we've made that 1986 change in comic movies. The studios, like the comic companies, are shedding the idea that comics are kid's stuff. They now know how dark they can go and still sell toys.

Basically, I follow enough information regarding super heroes and movies, and film development in general (thanks, RTF degree! Seriously, we studied this @#$%.) that I know an article like this means almost next to nothing in the grand scheme of things. Everything could change tomorrow. As I often say, "don't believe a word of it until you read the reports that they're actually rolling film."

If every report I read in the run up to Superman Returns were true, there would be four different Superman movies, two of which would star Ashton Kutcher, floating around. You learn to take this with a grain of salt.

So long, Superman Returns

"Superman Returns" didn't take off with fans. Mostly because it wasn't an action movie (Superman punches nobody), and because of the introduction of the out-of-continuity love child of Lois and Superman.

Comic fans have been up in arms about the kid since the movie came out, declaring Superman a "deadbeat dad", which sounds great in a comment section, but is entirely inaccurate if you actually watch the movie. The movie is, after all, all about Superman's legacy from father to son, and moving on beyond the world you embraced to embrace the future ahead of you through your child (no, seriously).

I loved the way they displayed Superman's powers, and believed the movie was absolutely gorgeous and rich, the way a Superman movie should be. The whole thing looked and felt like a fairy tale, in a way movies have forgotten how to look since the 1980's. And Brandon Routh was as perfect a guy in the role as I could have hoped for.

But I also don't know where they could go with Jason Lane. Many folks online were of the "they should kill him off" camp, which... seriously? Kill a child (even a fictional child)? That's kind of messed up. Not to mention woefully uncreative.

Maybe it was just a good end-capper on the Reeves movies, which always deserved better than Superman 3 and (certainly) 4.

I'm comfortable with a re-boot of the movie franchise at this point. But only under the right circumstances. It's promising that they're interested in taking their cues from "Dark Knight", so at least we don't need to worry about McG casting Ashton Kutcher as Superman and having him enegage in extreme sports or some such...

But I'd also point out, the "common wisdom" that marvel did the right thing by re-booting "The Hulk"? Ang Lee's 2003 "Hulk" grossed $132 million domestic. Ed Norton's 2008 "Incredible Hulk" grossed $134 million domestic. Add in 5 years of inflation, and a "re-boot" doesn't necessarily mean anything as far as success.

So we're going to have to wait and see what shakes out.

My Advice to WB

Re-do the origin.

Your gut is telling you "hey, that Death of Superman thing sold like CRAZY in 1992! People love that stuff!" Yes, Superman dying is "dark". But...

Don't do it.

A) They've announced, like, four different takes on "Death of Superman", and released it as an animated movie at least once. Everyone knows he doesn't die (really), so its sort of anti-climatic. You aren't going to do the "Reign of the Supermen", which was sort of the point of Death of Superman... so don't do it.
B) Also, "Death of Superman" was supposed to have impact because Superman was established in the DCU for years before he croaked. If that's part of your "all new Superman", you're essentially putting a guy out there, and then he gets killed. Which, you know, doesn't look real good. Its a lot different from the guy who always wins finally losing, which was also the point.
C) "The Death of Superman" was a narrative mess, and isn't much fun to read as a collection. It involves the 1990's sprawling cast of super-characters, Lex's brain living in a 20-something Lex Luthor cloned body, an interdimensional protoplassmic Supergirl, a giant frog Lois uses for transportation, Green Lanterns, and at least one incident of grave robbing.
D) I think when even the mighty Bruce Timm tried to do it, the movie wasn't that great.

Use modern technology. Don't feel beholden to the Donner movies, and re-tell the origin so the kids have an all-new Superman for their generation.

Also:
1) Part of the magic of Superman is that he carves out who he is. There is no pre-destination, prophesies or "chosen ones" in Superman. That fundamentally goes against the grain of Superman as a character. He's about CHOICE to be heroic. Pre-destination stories are about people bumbling into greatness and resisting their heroic calling. Which is great, but its not Superman. Part of the magic was not that Jor-El specifically shot a rocket at Jonathan and Martha Kent, knowing exactly how they'd raise a child... It was that Jor-El has to take a leap of faith and hope for the best. And the luck of the draw that ordinary, salt-of-the-earth folks would be able to instill in Superman the right moral compass. Once you add to that, you're taking away from the story.
2) Krypton has to be gone. That's the point. No evil armies of Krypton.
3) I only want Lex if he has access to huge robots, a power suit, or a wide array of lasers. That said, gimme Lex.
4) You know who is really scary? Far scarier than thoughtless, inarticulate Doomsday? Brainiac.
5) You're going to want to give Superman his evil, opposite number with an evil Kryptonian. We've all seen Zod. Save it for a sequel or something.
6) Superman has a supporting cast. They've been well defined over 70 years. Use them.


2008 is the new 1986

I do think Robinov's comments give a glimpse of what's going on and point to a comment I made when I saw Dark Knight the first time. (oh, hell... I can't find when or where I said it. It might have been in conversation with Steven and Lauren).

But I believe the success of Dark Knight in 2008 is going to be seen in much the same way as "Dark Knight Returns" was seen in the mid-80's, as well as "Watchmen". Non-comic readers will not ever know the cultural shift in comics that occurred thanks, in part, to those two works. Like some classic albums (maybe "Revolver", I dunno...) nothing was ever really the same after that within comics as those albums fundamentally changed pop music. In fact, it was that transition of DKR and Watchmen that I think led directly to comics' shift from kid's entertainment to an older audience for tights-wearing vigilantes.

With DKR and Watchmen, superheroes were, to some extent, seen for the fascists Wertham had always accused them of being. The image that had begun to chip away in the 70's of heroes with hands on fists saving the day with a wink was stomped into the dirt. In many ways, I grew up in a comics world where I had to go back to try and even find the kinds of comics my parents and guidance counselor assumed I was reading (I did make the mistake of handing my dad "The Killing Joke" summer of '89). To some extent, Marvel's "Civil War" event could have gone a lot further toward exploring Wertham's assertions, but instead chose to be a story about how Iron Man is a jerk and Cap makes sentimental decisions.

As rich as I think the Spidey movies have been, and as impressed as I was with Iron Man, Dark Knight was a different kind of movie. And what studios need to realize, that the comic companies took entirely too long to realize (and it almost destroyed the industry in the process) is that Dark Knight is lightning in a bottle. With his proclamation, its as if (but not quite) Robinov were to declare he's going to slate two gangster pictures a year on the assumption that they'll be as good as "Godfather I & II".

The fallout of Watchmen wasn't that every comic became an introspection of the super-soul and the industry itself matured over night. It was that comic writers felt that they should create flawed, tortured characters who occasionally had sex. The comics were being produced by often lesser writers, who saw the sturm und drang of Dark Knight Returns, but missed what it was that made the series work, all while being entirely true to the Batman's roots.

By the mid-90's I wasn't really reading superhero comics because many of the titles had devolved into a glossy, messy warground in which superheroes, in order to be "darker, grittier, more extreme" were becoming increasingly more lethal and a lot more likely to pull the trigger.

And that's part of the problem with declaring that you're going to make your superheroes themselves "darker". At some point, you're missing the fundamental core of the characters that make them the good guys and separates them from the bad guys, and now you're just talking two guys in tights beating the holy hell out of each other (which is part of why I flinched any time I heard mention of the proposed "Superman vs. Batman" movie. What's the point?).

Maybe this is a natural curve that the movies will have to go through.

A note regarding what happened with super-hero comics...

It's dishonest to try to pretend that all comics move in one colossal shift, as if its a coordinated affair. There are always lots of missteps. But a movement in any direction tends to leave a lot of splinters around that tenaciously hang on. Characters and concepts I have no use for (ex: Marvel's Cable) survive and prosper.

DC's limited series "Kingdom Come" was like a wake-up call to the DCU. Slowly but surely, much of the DCU gave up on "extreme" in favor of "iconic". "Kingdom Come" seemed to boil the heroes down to their essence and ask aloud what Superman, Batman and the rest of the JLA were doing about the state of the industry. And they answered loudly.

According to Valerie at Occasional Superheroine, who once worked as an Assistant Editor at DC, Didio was still learning the lessons of the 90's, and moved in exactly the wrong direction for a spell, when she attended a retreat sometime around 2003, I'd guess. (I like Val's blog, but I think she overestimates the change this particular retreat had on DC, as they were in the post "Kingdom Come" shift away from ridiculous 90's characters like the Dr. Fate spin-off, Fate.)

I don't know how that would work with comic movies, or if any of this would come to pass. But I do know that there's some history here, and movie audiences and movie creators probably aren't all that different from those of comics.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Jamie home

Jamie is home and resting. She's all hopped up on medically prescribed goofballs, so I honestly can't tell you exactly how she's doing, but I think she's okay.

It's been a long week for me, so I can't begin to guess what its been like for her.

Hopefully we'll be back soon to your usual programming and the same exciting League and Troubles you've come to know and love.

A Tapeheads Homage?

I don't know how many of you have ever seen the 80's era flick "Tapeheads" starring a very young John Cusack and Tim Robbins, but it was sort of one of those "defining movies of my youth".

It's about a video director and his somewhat sleezy producer pal who love a 60's soul duo "The Swanky Modes" (based on the very real and very awesome Sam & Dave... and, coincidentally, actually starring Sam Moore of Sam & Dave).

I have pitched the name "Swanky Modes" to Jason as a band name a few times, and have always been turned down.

Tapeheads is a very low-key comedy. They don't really make them like this any more, which is a shame. It's the sort of movie that seamlessly involves the band Menudo as a major plotpoint without blinking.

Anyhow, the band "Yacht" has cut a video, which is, shot-for-shot, a scene from "Tapeheads".

Let's get into trouble, baby..!


YACHT - Summer Song from Jona Bechtolt on Vimeo.
Found at Beaucoupkevin(dot)com
Honestly, from his post, I'm not sure Kevin was aware of the reference.

The original:


Jason and I used to use the term "Baby Doll" as a reference to both the sort of Euro-Pop of the time, and to describe a certain low-budget style of video making that was prevalent back in the 80's when MTV still showed videos.

Song Example: Well, clearly, anything by A-Ha.

Video Example: I still love this song, but the video for Seal's Crazy was totally "Baby Doll".

Interestingly, despite a credit to the band "Cube Squared", Devo seems to be responsible for "baby Doll", so whether they meant it as a joke or with all sincerity is anyone's guess. In all honesty, I run hot and cold with Devo, and "Baby Doll" is a pretty good example of why.

It is too bad "Yacht" didn't adapt Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles ad from Tapeheads.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Comic Fodder Post and More

The Silence of the Low-Selling Title: in which I talk about how DC does nothing to keep their comics alive when they begin to fail. And, heck, how they don't even really try with new series.

Need for a Policy Change at SDCC: in which I discuss the need for a new policy on sexual harassment at Comic Con International

And this isn't mine, but it's going to wind up in League Links, or Comic Links. The Con Anti-Harassment Project

Jamie having out-patient procedure tomorrow

So I don't think I'm going to post. Here's her site if you want to send her well wishes.


If this is what greets her in the OR, she has my permission to run.

Happy Birthday, Admiral!

Here's to another year of being totally awesome


A B-25 flying through a wall of flame is almost as awesome as The Admiral

Sasquatch story: The jig is up

Well, the dream of a Sasquatch Scam is dead.

I honestly have no idea what these two guys from Georgia were thinking, or why anyone in their right mind went along with them on their "bigfoot in a freezer" story. I don't think I need to outline all the problems with their gameplan, if the goal was to make money off the discovery. My guess is that this was the introduction of the power of mass media to these two guys.

And, honestly, I'm disappointed that they didn't stick to their guns on their cockamamie story and just ride it out.

I will also say that the two hoaxers are handling things well... by disappearing!

They have managed to follow at least two parts of the three-fold path of the coward:
1) Deny everything
2) Make counter-allegations
3) Run like hell

And for that, I kind of respect them.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

May-Treanor and Walsh Win 2nd Gold (and Bolt is amazing)

The League salutes Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh for winning their second Gold at the 2008 Olympics!

That's, I think, 108 straight victories for the duo. They've never disappointed, and we at The League of Melbotis have to tip our hat.

Here's the AP article.

Keep in mind, this time they did it in the driving rain against a team that had the home crowd advantage.


(I'd have a better picture here, but the news services are a little slow with a proper, victorious image)

And, by the way, Usain "Lightning" Bolt, set a world record while winning the 200m last night. The man is unreal. I saw in the comments that Reed-o is also a fan of the man. If you've been watching track, I don't see how you couldn't like the guy.

Here.



Shazam! Bolt wins the 200m!

The League in Film School

This clip from Clone High is pretty much exactly like my experience presenting my work in film school.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Some random bits

It's not too late to submit questions to the Melbotis Mailbag either by e-mail or the comments section of this post.

Stolen from Randy's website: someone terribly suspicious of the symbol of God's promise

http://view.break.com/549954 - Watch more free videos
STOP REFRACTION NOW (in another 20 years, it will be too late). Time to ask yourself: What could possibly make this happen?

Music is always better when you can relate:

Thanks to JAL for forwarding the video

I've also been watching some Olympics, and some thoughts:

-Usain Bolt and the rest of the Jamaican sprint team are insane. Somehow (and I'm not sayin' how) Jamaicans have managed to harness the "Speed Force". Wally West, look out.
-That said: US sweeps men's hurdles!
-And I think I have a tiny crush on Sanya Richards, Texas runner who is now a Bronze Medalist
-The reason they are canceling softball in the Olympics: The US women literally cannot be beat. They have outscored the competition 50+ - 1. YOU CANNOT BEAT CAT OSTERMAN.
-May-Treanor and Walsh up for a Gold tomorrow in beach Volleyball. Be there. This may be the grand finale to a couple of amazing careers (both have hinted at retiring to start families).
-I actually salute NBC's coverage of the Beijing Olympics. They've managed to cut the footage down to the parts you're going to want to see when they aren't showing anything live. It makes stuff like Men's gymnastics, in which I have only a passing interest, a lot more watchable.

League Approved Olympic Training:



Anyway, I had to work tonight, so hopefully you Leaguers will forgive me if the post is a bit short.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Football - Bring Your Oxygen Tank



So, I accidentally bought season tickets to UT home games this year.

I know. I know. I'm unemployed.

The language on the website said something about "sign up now to get a chance at season tickets". What I didn't realize was that this didn't mean, "sign up now to get an opportunity later", it meant "we've got a really weird queue for tickets, and while you'll probably get tickets, you might not".

I assumed I was entering into some draft that I could walk away from when I came to my senses and realize I had no money. Rather, I gave a shadowy UT office a sack of money they would return if they ran out of slots.


The section I'm sitting in does not yet exist in this photo. I'll be in that empty blue space in the pic.

So, yeah, I think I literally have top-row tickets in the end zone for this season's football games. The way it works, every year I get season tickets, the better my seats will get. Always in cue behind: rich folk who give UT much larger sacks of money, members of the UT Foundation, longtime members of the Texas-Exes (of which I am a member, but I'm not done with my payments), friends and family of anyone with influence at UT, etc...

So, in, like, 2088, I might actually have decent seats.


Don't @#$% up, bro

Despite what I am anticipating to be excruciating heat at the first games, I'm thinking this will be fun. Especially as I will be at an elevation higher than any other structure in town, and be able to see birds and bats flying lower than where I'm sitting.

I will also be, I think, under the Jumbotron, so I will need to wear some sort of lead-shielding in order to make sure I am not irradiated.

Other than that, I'm pretty excited. I am not expecting a BCS bowl this year out of UT, but I am thinking we could be in the top 15 or so if Colt keeps his head on right and Chiles gets some playing time. We have three strong running back contenders (one of them is named "Fozzy". That's his name. And that is awesome.).


Wokka wokka!

And Major Applewhite is back in a backs-coach position. How sweet is that?

I think UT fans have a sort of unspoken belief that Major Applewhite is destined to be a headcoach at UT one day. If you're Major, you ride that belief for all its worth.

Anyway, I don't know what the schedule is yet for when or if Jamie is coming to games. So don't start with me on asking for spare tickets. But I'll keep you posted if I have a loose ticket.

GO HORNS!!!


I can dream of a return to glory at this point in the season. Don't ruin it for me.

Stray Thought of the Day: The Olympics and Der UberMensch

So Michael Phelps got me thinking...

One of the things we take for granted is that every Olympics, swimmers bust records, runners bust records, weightlifters lift more weight than anyone had ever lifted before. I don't mean we take the Olympians for granted, but we do assume that in a few races, somebody is going to break a record and swim faster, run faster, etc... than we've ever seen.

Which makes the League ponder...

Is there a point at which we won't be able to continue to beat records? Is there ever going to be a maximum recorded speed for humans to swim? To run? To lift weight? To jump? To throw a javelin?

I assume that in 40 years, the training, diet, equipment, etc... that athletes use will improve to such a degree that what we feel is state of the art today will look to them as the women in petticoats playing golf at the 1900 Olympics looks to us now (gymnastics and track & field wouldn't be added until 1928).


No doubt, these women were considered strumpets for their revealing athletic wear. And rightfully so.

So I wonder if, year after year (and four years after four years), as time marches on... what sort of humans will we be building? Will we see a Michael Phelps in the year 3000 that moves through the water faster than a motor boat? Or will we find some invisible wall and find ourselves competing for 1/1000ths of a second, never pushing beyond some as-yet-unseen boundary?

No doubt the future of gene manipulation (through state-mandated breeding programs, or through some mad science), we haven't yet begun to see how fast, strong, and unbelievable the human body will be by the time The League is an old man.

But, jump-forward to, say, the year 5000? What does it mean for sport when records are no longer breakable? Is that even a conceivable idea? Or is our desire, as humans, to continue to build and grow, advance and see progress so ingrained in us as a species that we will see swimmers who cut through the water like fish? Will they be recognizably human to our eyes from 2008?


Phelps in 3008?

Sunday, August 17, 2008

The Sasquatch Corpse Saga Continues!

...now I just wonder exactly how far this is going to go!

Here's an article from Yahoo!

These dudes are sticking to their guns in the face of mounting evidence, logic and common sense. And you have to respect that. The technique is what I would call "The Jason Alternate Reality Technique", where you insist your cockamamie story is true way past the point of reason, and refuse to let the story go 20 years later (you are not secretly 5th grade math teacher, Mr. Glowka, in a clever disguise).

CNN covered the story. Unfortunately, in doing so, there was a technical gaffe that led to the following:


When things go wrong at the CNN master control.

Bigfoot press conference - covered by Fox


Bigfoot press conference (spoof)


Classic Bigfoot

Stacked Dogs



These are my dogs. I post pics of your kids, you can put up with pics of Mel and Lucy.

Pineapple Express

Saturday I headed out to Alamo South to see the latest film in the Apatow/ Rogan/ Ferrell... comedy phalanx that has pretty much redefined comedy rather abruptly since 40 Year Old Virgin (speaking of... I think Steve Carrell would do well to hook up with these guys again rather than enter into another big-budget flick with luke-warm critical and audience reception).

Pineapple Express won't appeal to my parents, and I really wouldn't find it something I'd want my kids to see if they were under 16. But it does hit that sweet marketing spot of 18-34 year olds pretty well.

I did find the movie funny. I found the reviews that harped on the shocking violence and action to have overstated their case. The balance was similar to films such as "Beverly Hills Cop", so I don't think action/ comedy of this nature is exactly a new idea.

For full disclosure, here is my "six degrees of separation" relationship to director David Gordon Green. Green lived on my floor in Jester my first year of college, and I think, at most, I would say hi to him in the hallway. I knew him mostly because he lived with another David, musician David Wingo, so they were in the room with two Davids. David Green fled UT to go to a film conservatory in North Carolina sophomore year, which I thought was just crazy at the time. And he'd send David Wingo copies of his student work, which we'd all watch at parties and whatnot.

What struck me as interesting was that (a) I was never enamored with Green's sense of humor in his college films (I was alone in this opinion). And (b) how Pineapple Express displayed some of that sense of humor, but actually really made it work. The same sense of uncontrolled chaos and oddly placed priorities is as present in his films I recall watching in college as Pineapple Express.

Speaking of, seeing what happened to his work between his college material and his first feature, George Washington, was mind-blowing. There's nothing like seeing someone else's work, who should be your peer, to let you know "this person has a skill I do not, and never could, have."

Pineapple Express is a pretty darn far cry from George Washington, so it'll be interesting to see what direction green takes his career from here.

Also, I need to look up Wingo. It's been years since I've talked to that guy. Tjeff will know where he is... Little help, tjeff?

(tjeff who floats through the comments section occasionally is, by the way, another musician whose work I'd recommend. Here's his site.)

I also happened to watch part of "Knocked Up" last night, the Seth Rogan sleeper hit from last summer. And while I enjoyed Rogan in "Pineapple Express", Rogan is going to need to learn to play a character other than Seth Rogan at some point. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but at some point, the audience is going to find all of his roles so indistinguishable, its going to have a negative effect. Doofus twenty-something with a disarming laughing is only going to work so long.

And, surprisingly, James Franco's perpetually stoned character "Saul" doesn't come off as grating, but actually pretty likable, which I wasn't expecting. Franco is a pretty direct contrast to Rogan's insistence on playing himself, as he throws himself into the character pretty fully, and is unrecognizable as Harry Osborn of the Spidey movies.

As per plot, PE is a surprisingly tight crime script, with a certain narrowly defined cast of colorful characters (Danny McBride of "Foot Fist Way" is a particular highlight). Too often comedies decide plot is secondary, but Pineapple Express has natural arcs for literally every character, and works as well, from a narrative standpoint, as any recent crime movie I've seen. It just happens to feature two guys who could be your neighbors in the last apartment complex you lived in.

I'll be honest, I don't think you'll lose much seeing the movie on the small screen. So you can probably wait to see it in the comfort of your La-Z-Boy. And while I'm not sure how long the Apatow comedy collective (oh, Freaks and Geeks! What wonders thou hast wrought!) can keep up this pace, but they're managing to make movies that seem a heck of a lot smarter than, say, "Hollywood Chihuahua".

Saturday, August 16, 2008

More Olympics: Phelps


You're a genetic freak, but you're our genetic freak.

Eight Medals. EIGHT. 8.

CNN has it here.

Olympics: Libby Trickett



This is Australian swimmer Libby Trickett. She's quite good and has won some medals.

I just like saying her name out loud.

Libby Trickett.

Libby Trickett.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Melbotis Mailbag!



Hey, it's been a while since we've heard from some of you. So why don't you write in with your updates, questions, comments, etc... and Melbotis and I will do our best to answer any and all questions sent our way.

Comic Fodder Post

...in which I discuss the criticism of comic book writers as "fanboys".

Go here.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

When Cakes Go Wrong



Tip of the hat to Marshall for providing this work-day killer: Cake Wrecks.

There's something absoludicrous about a cake gone wrong. Perhaps because I find the cakes one gets at the grocery to be kind of... bizarre. They just don't represent anything you'd make for yourself or your family at home, and there's something so perfunctory about the cakes (not to mention the events that precipitate such a cake).

Add in the tragedy or utter indifference that must fill the lives of the makers of these cakes, and the feel of defeat which must strike the person who has come to retrieve the cake the day of the celebration. I, myself, picked up a cake for a former co-worker and friend named John. They had spelled his name "JHON", which we didn't notice until we were half-way back to the office with the cake.

But, you know... they misspelled JOHN. It was so weird to see it misspelled, I paused and looked at it for a long, long time, entering into that weird zone where you wonder if you know how to spell "John" yourself.

From watching Food Channel, I also know that desserts are now no longer just an artform for the palate, but for feats of edible architecture. Which, of course, is going to lead to awesomeness.

Bigfoot Story (sadly) Falling Apart

It sounds like the likelihood of us seeing a real Bigfoot corpse tomorrow is now next to nil.

And, I have to send out my sympathy to site-owner for CyrptoMundo, Loren Coleman. The reasone we couldn't get to his site the other day was that his server was hacked, and he's had to bring everything back up, entailing a lot of work during a possible high-profile time for Cryptomundo.

Anyway, Coleman describes why the story is crumbling here.

Whoever the guys are trying to get this hoax going need to learn how to strike while the iron is hot. And not put out a "bigfoot corpse" which makes Jamie burst into peels of laughter.

That's a Whole Lot of Kryptonians


click on image to have your mind blown

I know some folks don't like the work of Alex Ross. Those people amaze me (in a disappointed way).

Me, I'm an Alex Ross nut. Especially when he's painting The Man of Steel and Co.

There's an upcoming story crossing over the Super-Titles in the coming months entitled: New Krypton. Supposedly there's several thousand Kryptonians coming to Earth. At least that's what the DC promo materials have said.

There are so many question marks, I can't help but be interested. Plus, note the various eras of Superman publishing represented in the various Kryptonian outfits. And I think that silver one way, way up in the sky represents the Krypton of the Donner-directed Superman movie. (Also, note Silver Age Nightwing and Flamebird, heroes of Kandor, coming at you).

And, who is that center frame? That's my boy, Krypto, yo!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

More Cryptozoological Hoo-Hah

El Chupacabra runs amok in Cuero

Reed sent this article along: You know its summer when chupacabra shows up

Note that you can link over to some video from that page, caught from the dashcam of a police cruiser.

It looks like some sort of dog that's managed to breed with little hair, or else suffers from mange. Natural selection choosing to greatly decrease hair on a dog living in Texas kind of makes sense, so I really don't know what we're looking at. And I don't know if this is the same nasty thing that's been attacking small livestock for generations. But it certainly doesn't seem like a domesticated house pet with no interest in your pygmy goats.

The last one that turned up, though, turned out to be nothing spookier than a coyote.

With this summer's earlier, and far more bizarre find of the Montauk Monster, one expects the Moth Man to be found drinking Schlitz at some bar in West Virginia.


More on Georgia Freezer Sasquatch

I found a site that had nabbed the pictures from Cryptomundo of that Bigfoot in a Freezer. Sorry that took so long.

I want to say that while the thought didn't pop into my head until I saw it online, but I suspect that this isn't just a hoax, but some sort of viral marketing campaign. Maybe for Jack Link's Beef Jerky. Or maybe an ARG spun out of control or something.


You just hope that nobody wanted those Otter Pops they left on the bottom of the freezer

here's a part of a Press Release:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
August 12, 2008

BIGFOOT BODY FOUND

DNA evidence and photo evidence to be presented at a PRESS CONFERENCE
to be held on
Date: Friday, August 15, 2008
Time: From 12Noon-1:00pm
Place: Cabana Hotel-Palo Alto (A Crown Plaza Resort) 4290 El Camino Real, Palo Alto, California 94306

Searching for Bigfoot, Inc. Menlo Park, California
Tom Biscardi, CEO

BIGFOOT BODY FOUND - EVIDENCE AND DNA DETAILS TO BE PRESENTED AT A PRESS CONFERENCE ON FRIDAY, AUGUST 15th

FROM 12 N00N TO 1:00PM AT THE CABANA HOTEL-PALO ALTO IN PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA

A body that may very well be the body of the creature commonly known as “Bigfoot” has been found in the woods in northern Georgia.

DNA evidence and photo evidence of the creature will be presented in a press conference on Friday, August 15th from 12 Noon to 1:00pm at the Cabana Hotel-Palo Alto at 4290 El Camino Real in Palo Alto, California, 94306. The press conference will not be open to the public. It will only be open to credentialed members of the press.
Here are some of the vital statistics on the “Bigfoot” body:
*The creature is seven feet seven inches tall.
*It weighs over five hundred pounds.
*The creature looks like it is part human and part ape-like.
*It is male.
*It has reddish hair and blackish-grey eyes.
*It has two arms and two legs, and five fingers on each hand and
five toes on each foot.
*The feet are flat and similar to human feet.
*Its footprint is sixteen and three-quarters inches long and five and three-quarters inches wide at the heel.
*From the palm of the hand to the tip of the middle finger, its hands are
eleven and three-quarters inches long and six and one-quarter inches wide.
*The creatures walk upright. (Several of them were sighted on the same day that the body was found.)
*The teeth are more human-like than ape-like.
*DNA tests are currently being done and the current DNA and photo evidence will be presented at the press conference on Friday, August 15th.


I won't get into how the holes that are starting to form as part of the story, but I wouldn't expect much by Friday.

Holy Overused Robinisms, Batman! (plus, Countdown to backlash)

Someone finally notices that newspaper headlines on Batman are dumb

When the mainstream press finally takes note of how worn out the Batman TV-series inspired Bat-headlines are (Ex: Holy Megabucks, Batman!), it is a ray of hope that the rest of the media will finally knock it off.

Check it out at the LA Times (blog section). Hat tip to The Beat.

Now, if we can just get the press to refrain from using the following: Bam! Whap! Zap! or Pow! in any other stories about super-heroes, there may be a chance for comics in mainstream journalism.

Backlash imminent

And for no other reason than that it seems time, and the movie is doing very well:
Prepare yourself for the beginnings of Dark Knight backlash, wherein many, many people take to the internets to tell you that Dark Knight wasn't all that great.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Yahoos Claim to Have Corpse of Sasquatch

Hat tip to Occasional Superheroine for locating this story on CryptoMundo (what I assume is the New York Times for all your cryptozoological needs).

I've updated my link to a story where there are photos of the alleged creature.

Jason will surely freak out about all of this, but here we go...

Apparently some guys claim they have the body of a Bigfoot, found in Georgia. They're keeping the body in a freezer somewhere under armed guard until it can be released to the scientific community tomorrow. I, personally, think that this picture could be something, or it could be a latex mask and a costume shoved into a freezer with some deer innards. But I do find it interesting that they're taking it this far if its a hoax.

"But League," you say, "The Bigfoot lives in the Pacific Northwest!"
Oh, my friends... Bigfoots live all over the US. From our friends of the piney woods of Washington to the Bigfoot of Eastern Oklahoma to the Skunk Ape of Florida. Heck, if you turn and look around fast enough right now, there's probably a Bigfoot standing behind you.


The League streaks Zilker Park

Now, The League tends to be a bit cynical when it comes to cryptozoology. We're hopeful, but we mostly think that an undocumented species of 8 foot ape living in the US at this point is as likely as me learning Emmanuel Lewis is secretly living in Jamie's walk in closet.

I say that, but they DID just find several 10's of thousands more gorillas in Africa, so...

Anyway, mostly I'm deeply cynical of hoaxes and peoples' natural inclination to perpetrate hoaxes.

It will be interesting to see what these guys came up with. But it raises a good question.

INTERACTIVITY TIME:
Let us suppose these fellows in Georgia really have the body of a Bigfoot, and their find is confirmed and welcomed by the scientific community.

A) When you learn of the Bigfoot's authenticity, who is the first person you would tell?

B) If Bigfoot is real, what else might be real?

C) How would knowing Bigfoot is real change your outlook on life?

D) A Texas Oil Tycoon has offered a 300 million dollar bounty for finding and bringing back a corpse from another Bigfoot so he can stuff it and put it over his fireplace. A DotCom billionaire has offered 100 million for the first living Sasquatch brought into captivity. He's built a majestic habitat for the Bigfoot in Redmond, Washington. You think you know where a Bigfoot might be.

What do you do?

E) Any other thoughts on the possible reality of a Bigfoot?

Obligatory Olympics Post: Hyperbole and NBC

When I was in 6th grade, I recall being assigned a worksheet that was a quick exercise to check that we understood the lesson before we moved on within the framework of the day's lesson. We were learning about how to use metaphor, hyperbole and other tidbits of language that employ imagery.

One of the take aways from the lesson, that I found odd at the time, was Ms. Jarcik's off-the-book comment that you shouldn't use too much hyperbole, because people find it annoying. Well, normally The League loves hyperbole, but, darn it... if the announcers for the Olympics at NBC aren't ruining it for me.

In watching both men and women's gymnastics this week, it struck me that so much of why I have trouble watching gymnastics/ taking gymnastics seriously, is the insistence on every other phrase uttered from the announcer's mouth insisting that every single flip of the wrist or hop on the balance beam isn't just important to that routine... but that it's a mistake upon which the Olympics hang. And that, seriously, is not hyperbole.

Add in the turn-on-a-dime commentary in which the announcers switch from lauds and honor to expressing their disgust with some poor kid in tights, often within the same breath, and its often a mind-blowing ride trying to figure out if the announcers are lobbying for the beatification of some 16 year-old or blame her slip on the balance beam for crushing the spirit of America.

I know that these announcers' lives are gymnastics, but its just lacking that perspective that you get in about June about the baseball season from the announcers, when they're talking about what was on TV last night and what people in the crowd are up to.

It seems you can really point to gymnastics and diving as the two sports where the announcers don't just comment upon performance, but microscopically pick every movement apart (which is what the judges are doing) but do it in this really pedantic, school marm tone.

This evening the little blonde girl, Nastia, had a nigh-perfect routine, scoring a 16.9 (which is .1 away from perfection), and no sooner had the first announcer said "16.9!" than the other announcer was tripping all over himself to insist "It's just not going to be enough!"

Dude. Shut up. Learn to enjoy a moment or two. Life's too short. And, moreover... what are you like at home? What with the turn-on-a-dime swings between giddiness and praise to immediate condemnation...? It must be exhausting.

How anyone can tune these nags out, and how NBC can't find someone who doesn't come off like such a shrew for both diving and gymnastics is beyond me.

I feel bad, because it really makes the Olympics almost unwatchable when you have to listen to these announcers. Plus, I know Jamie loves gymnastics (she's a former cheerleader), and I too infrequently bite my tongue and just let it ride when the announcers make some breathless comment. So it leads to me ruining the whole thing for her.

So, really, NBC is slowly ruining my marriage with their sub-standard color commentators.

Astronaut Traverses Continent on Bike

Cousin Jim (he of the Rocket Racing League) has written to inform me of his pal, Astronaut John B. Herrington, who is about to begin a 4000 mile bike ride to promote kid's interest in math and science.

Herrington is also a member of Jim's RRL squad.

Even as I write that sentence, it makes me feel like such an underachieving loser.

Okay, on with the post.

Starting wednesday, Herrington will be riding from Cape Flattery, Washington to Cape Canaveral, Florida. Again, he's doing this on a bike. In the summer. 4000 miles.

So what are you doing with your summer?

This is why astronauts are astronauts and I am not.

Anyway, The League will be following Herrington on his trek via the interwebs. And you can, too, at his site: Rocketrek. if you have a chance, link over to the site from your own blog and help our Astronaut Herrington in his mission.

His mission for SCIENCE!

Monday, August 11, 2008

My Mom Can Shred


KareBear, Pastor Bill and KareBear's partner in crime, Peggy

Yes, the guy in the middle is a pastor.

Somehow I imagine KareBear is tearing up "Crazy Train"

Wolf-Man is coming back to hassle you

Even a man who is pure in heart
and says his prayers by night
may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms
and the autumn moon is bright.


I like The Wolf Man.

I'm not as big a fan of the original The Wolf Man movies as I am of the first two Frankenstein pictures. But I do think the original Wolf Man is a really good time. Horror. Romance. Pathos. Wolf clubbing.

I knew the story of the original Wolf Man from one of my monster movie books from when I was a kid, and its been spoofed, imitated, etc... so often that the story seems, perhaps, more simple than it actually is thanks to its immediate familiarity.

Suffer poor Lon Chaney Jr., who is talented, but who never landed his father's career or reputation. Yet, Lon Chaney Jr's actually a genial sort of Wolf-Man, and you really pull for him. I can't really imagine anyone else in the role, but part of that's sealed with time. Like many of the monster movies, the Wolf-Man is a sympathetic figure cursed with an affliction rather than a creature of outright evil (see: Dracula).

Now, its never a good time being a werewolf. You tend to kill and eat your friends, tear up the countryside and generally cause a lot of havoc that you normally would not. And without the benefit of getting to be a player, a la Edward Hyde.

The movie also features Claude Raines, and, dammit, when it comes to genre movies, YOU CANNOT GO WRONG WITH CLAUDE RAINES.

here's a fan-made trailer for the original:



Anyhoo, looks like they've finished a lot of principle photography on a new version of The Wolf Man, starring Benecio Del Toro. This is a bootleg video of ComicCon footage. Watch it before Universal pulls it down.



The director is Joe Johnston, who isn't my favorite director, but who I think could handle the material pretty well. Especially if he just really cuts loose. Plus, hey, lovely period outfits for the art film snobs.

I don't know why some trailers look wrong, and some look right. I suppose a lot of it has to do with the Keanu Reeves quotient.

Plus, you know, the promise of werewolves.


Wolf Man then


Wolf Man now


In case you missed it, Steven's B-Day. Birthday celebration, desserts, video and Steven's generally positive demeanor, all by Lauren.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Dark Knight in IMAX and in Perspective

Jamie, Jason, Wagner and Wagner's brother, Jeff, and I all ventured out to see "The Dark Knight" at the IMAX at the Bob Bullock Museum today. The show was sold out, as, I believe, all shows were sold out over the weekend for the IMAX.

It's true this movie is doing gangbusters. And on a second viewing, and sort of pondering what else I've seen this summer, rightfully so.

A second viewing revealed some plot holes I missed watching the movie the first time. Mostly regarding stuff like "well how did Batman know to be there then?" I'd say I'd let that slip, normally. But I reserve Batman simply KNOWING where to be for Batman as supporting character and seeing how he creeps out even his fellow JLA'ers. In a comic, cartoon or movie about Batman, he's a detective, and him figuring those sorts of things out is often what the story is about.

But, you know... Batman is cool like that, so if he just knows where to be, then... awesome. But had they done too much of this, its the same sort of thing that usually makes me say "I have absolutely no idea what is happening in this movie..." What bugs me about that sort of thing is that Batman IS a detective. At least in the comics. So would it have killed them to say "how did you find me?" And then have Batman give some idiot simple explanation.

I actually think I followed the plot a lot better this time instead of just gritting my teeth and letting the movie knock me over like a rogue wave. And, I am happy to say, the Batpod was just as cool on a second viewing.

Given the stories on all the clams Batman is making for Legendary and WB (and hopefully the folks who worked on the movie), I looked up how its ACTUALLY doing in an historical perspective. You can see where it's currently sitting at Box Office Mojo's adjusted dollars comparison page. Unlike every entertainment reporter in the world, this site actually takes inflation into account when making hyperbolic declarations about the success of a movie.

Right now, Dark Knight has almost made as much/ sold as many tickets as... Batman. Go figure. That said, I recall seeing Burton's Batman in the theater about five or six times over the course of several months, and Dark Knight's been in release for about four weeks. So... we'll see.

But its also sort of fascinating to consider ticket sales for something like "Cleopatra" when you compare it to the actual population of the time, number of screens, etc... In a way, it makes you really realize how even movies are narrowcasting to such a degree that when a movie DOES make superstar money these days, its worth looking at why that's happening.

How was Dark Knight in IMAX? I have no idea. We were sitting so close to the screen that I know the effect was totally lost on me. Aside for being able to say "Oh, THAT'S what it would be like to be a microbe floating somewhere near Morgan Freeman's face!", I don't know if I got everything out of it I could have. Jason actually got up and moved to the back and had to tell me the screen changed aspect ratios throughout. I hadn't even noticed because I was sitting in the middle of the image.

World Now Significantly Less Soulful

If you noticed that things seemed a lot less groovy today, there's a reason.

Isaac Hayes has passed away.

We're losing too many of the great ones.

Steven G Harms is old

I couldn't post on this before, because Lauren was attempting to keep things a surprise, but Happy Birthday to Steven G. Harms.

Last night we met up at Threadgill's on Riverside for some home-style cookin', and a whole crew of Harms friends and admirers were in attendance. Lauren busted out some really great desserts at the end (which I am not sure was okay with Threadgill's policy, but they didn't argue, either). So cupcakes AND cherry pie for all.

I had a brief passing thought that JimD should have been in attendance as his George Baileyness led, in one way or another, to many of the folks celebrating Steven's birthday. I also worried that if we were in the first act of a film and all celebrating such a nice birthday (we somehow managed to squawk out Happy Birthday in tune), that this had to be one of those coming of age movies in which someone was going to die in the third reel.

So, I am doomed.

Happy Birthday, Steve-N.

Byrne & Eno, together again

Do you like David Byrne? I do. Maybe not as much as some, but I have something like 80% of his stuff. Unfortunately, some time around 1995 I quit being able to remember the name of every song on every album I owned, so don't ask me what is on what album or anything. That part of my brain just doesn't function.

It seems Byrne and Eno have once again decided to collaborate. Funny, because just this week I was ripping "My Life in the Bush of Ghosts" to iTunes for the first time, as well as Byrne's "Grown Backwards" and Eno's "Here Come the Warm Jets". I've owned all of them for a while, but hadn't made the transition to iPod status.

Here's a link to a website for the new album. be careful, as there's self-starting audio.

There's a free MP3. That's pretty cool.

The site includes tour dates.

I happen to already have tickets to see Byrne as he's headlining (as far as I'm concerned) ACL Fest this summer. I'm glad I already had tickets. I think if his only swing through Austin was part of ACL Fest and I wasn't going? I'd be very irritated.

But I have tickets, so I'll try not to think about how ACL Fest is sort of screwing up Austin as a destination city for bands on tour. I'll be there at the AT&T stage for Byrne at the 6:30 show. Let me know if you're there, too.