Sunday, May 15, 2005

Some additions to The Royal Roster of Loyal Leaguers

We've added a few items to the blogroll recently. Check out Return to Comics and Dave's Long Box. Both have linked to The League, although The League does not know these people. We assume they are nice folks.

On a less comics-oriented front, God of Biscuits linked to The League, so we're returning the favor. We don't know God of Biscuits, but we assume he is the deity who gave King Biscuit his Flower Power.

And, of course, Michael Scaljon, whom I have not figured how he knows Jim.

****UPDATE****

Jim sent me two more folks who have linked to the League.

Pleadings star Heather Durham has linked to the League

as well as this person, known for their Profundities.
The League Totally $@%*ing Sells Out!

So, recently RHPT.com added advertising to RHPT.com. It's his personal blog and, like The League, the blog is Randy's personal gift to humanity.

Randy was attacked in his comments section, and responded here.

The biggest accusation? RHPT.com had lost his indie street cred (which, with $2.50 will get you a cup of coffee), and had TOTALLY $@%*ing sold out. To, I assume, The Man.


For your files, an image of The Man (aka: The Admiral)

The League loves doing anything with will make Jim D. sigh with resignation, and so has applied to join Google AdSense himself.

What, indeed, IS the earning potential of The League of Melbotis? Thus far The League has received goods and services from Loyal Leaguers, and hopes to receive more free stuff in the future. However, The League is morbidly curious to see, exactly, what can come of this.

So, The League decided to see what can happen with the profit-making potential of the internet (thanks, Al Gore!). Especially when you select the biggest ad type which won't totally jack-up your formatting?


The League turns to his usual financial advisor for advice on whether or not this will work.

I do plan to fill in Loyal Leaguers as to the processes and windfalls of my advertising here.

1. I applied to AdSense
2. They e-mailed me back a day later to say "welcome" and provide instructions.
3. The directions are relatively simple to get this thing up and online.
4. I have no idea how I'm actually going to get paid for this, or even what the math is on click-throughs.
5. It doesn't really matter. It's all in good fun.

I have noticed that Google has already done a crawl here at The League. We're now schilling Superman costumes and Justice League outfits.

I've also gone aheaded and added a web-search, courtesy of Our Dread Lord, Google. Have fun with that.

It's capitalism, ahoy! here at the S.S. Melbotis!

Friday, May 13, 2005

Okay, I just spent an hour watching a documentary on Oliver, the Humanzee.

I invite for you to read up on Oliver.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Apparently he lives here, near San Antonio.

As unnerving as Oliver may be, it was just as unnerving to learn that scientists sort of think it might not be too hard to mix and match human and chimpanzee DNA and make a Humanzee.
I can only assume my sense of dread from the other day foretold the loss by Suns from last night. Otherwise, I have no idea.

DC's president and publisher, Paul Levitz, has posted an open letter to DC fans regarding the logo change at the company.

As much as something seems afoot in the actual comics DC publishes, a few rumors have popped up of a DC Comics which will be asked to play ball with the parent omnicorp of Time-Warner. Previously, DC had kept a low profile within the corporation and acted more or less independently, pointing to licensing of the big three in order to justify their existence.

It's not so much that Time-Warner appears to feel DC needs to put up or get closed down, as much as they look at Marvel setting up their own movie studio, a billion dollars in receipts for Spider-Man, and other successes Marvel has managed to leverage. In short, they're looking to further merchandise DC properties and try to manage it in house so travesties like last year's Catwoman do not reoccur.

Personally, I think properties like Green Lantern (Corps), The Flash, Green Arrow and Black Canary might all be viable commodities. Second and third tier characters from DC would be at least as viable as Marvel's. And, heck... Marvel can't seem to sell Blade comic books, but the movies make tens of millions. Could DC make a succesful Question movie? What about Enemy Ace? Or Mr. Terrific?

The concern is this: As DC angles to drop "Comics" from their name, and, instead, become just DC (as is DC toys, DC movies, DC t-shirts)... What are those in power from above Levitz going to do to the comic line? It's never been hugely profitable, and with fewer and fewer comic readers existing in the world, what will happen? Will Time-Warner use it's distribution channels to increase circulation? Will the suits step in and hack and slash titles? Force format change? And, most important... how likely is it that somebody at Time-Warner above Levitz will begin to dictate what content is appropriate for a wider audience? Especially when lunch boxes and action figures get involved in the mix?

It's a waiting game at this point. But I've got faith in DC.

BTW, I like this picture DC has on the website, with Superman and Batman sort of endorsing the logo by association. The picture looks a bit like Superman and Batman are behaving as they might normally when confronted with something new. Batman looks suspicious, ready to kick somebody in the sternum. Superman looks enthusiastic, ready to check out this new thing, confident that if he tries hard enough, it's all going to work out.

Speaking of Superman, Bryan Singer has been publishing video diaries of his work on the currently filming Superman Returns. You can check them out over at Bluetights.net.

The latest video, as of this writing, is video 11. I deeply recommend you check it out. This video shows a first glimpse of the new Daily Planet offices.

Each item which I see regarding this movie makes me believe this movie is going to be the sort of Superman film I want to see.

I've picked up a copy of Sarah Vowell's "The Partly Cloudy Patriot." It's going to be a quick read. Some highly distracted reading tonight got me through about 60 pages. Vowell's writing is conversational, quick and breezy.

It's part-memoir, part navel-gazing, part who knows? Here's what I am really enjoying: a lot of younger writers riff on the morass of pop culture in our lifestyle. Movie, TV, music references. Touchstones which are going to mean something to your Gen-X/ Gen-Y reader more than allusions to House of the Seven Gables.

While Vowell does bring these things up, she's got a lengthier worldview. For the most part, she sticks to what she knows, and this is book of history as pop culture. Where others might dwell upon reruns of Gilligan's Island, Vowell visits Gettysburg and reflects upon Abraham Lincoln's likely penchant for procrastination if he is anything like her fellow writers. But the book doesn't devolve with Vowell swimming in detail. The book uses the knowing shared nod so familiar to Gen X writing, but refers to Thomas Jefferson the way others might point to Mick Jagger.

I won't draw any conclusions yet. I'm on page 61 for God's sake. But I am enjoying the book.

Work is going to pick up drastically this coming week. You may see slightly less of The League. Maybe Mrs. League will pick up the slack?

BTW, Duncan sort of lost that game. One or two better shots earlier on, or even that last shot, and the Spurs could have locked it up. Pretty poor showing for my two remaining teams.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

The League Presents:
Suggestions for Further Reading (special edition)








For the previous SFFR, go here.
Well, this evening saw a suprise (to The League, anyway) defeat handed to the Phoenix Suns by the wily Dallas Mavericks.

The Suns came out of the gate showing none of the qualities which have made them an exceptional team throughout the regular season. They certainly picked up steam in the 3rd quarter, and even occasionally took the lead in scoring, but Dallas simply outperformed them.

I missed large chunks of the first half while watching Smallville. Smallville has jumped the shark, and I won't be returning next season. This evening's episode was the single worst episode of any TV show, ever. One more episode and I'm out. It didn't even begin to make any sense.

Honestly, I put a lot of the responsibility for the Dallas victory not on any one player, but believe the laurels should be bestowed upon head coach, Avery Johnson. Avery put a real fire under the Mavs tonight, just as he once was able to do with the Spurs while on the court.

It's tough to say what the loss of Joe Johnson in the second half did to the Suns' overall performance. It seemed to both spur the Suns on, but the lack of Johnson's solid playing may have been the 3 point difference Phoenix needed to win.

I haven't checked the stats, but I think Phoenix's shooting percentage wasn't all that hot.

Ah, well. Off to Dallas for a few games.

Shut up, Marc Cuban.

***update***

It sounds like Joe will be out for a while. I heard on the radio he needs surgery to fix a broken bone near his EYE. Sumuvabitch. Ouch.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

The League is unsure of why, but The League has been feeling a general unease of late. It's that sort of "why are the animals all jittery? Oh, look! The volcano is smoking..." jitteriness which seems to be telling me something is currently, or is about to be, horribly, horribly wrong.

No idea what is up, but I can feel it, like a sort of tangible vibe in the air.

Perhaps I am listening to too much Marketplace, perhaps my underwear isn't fitting properly, perhaps it's because nothing in particular is actually going totally wrong at the moment.

Don't get me wrong. The League does not enjoy drama. The League avoids drama at every turn. The League also has never really perceived within himself a sort of Spidey-Sense to pick out trouble before it happens. But every once in a while, The League begins to suspect that maybe things are just a wee bit too quiet, and that can only mean we're in a lull before things get goofy, as things inevitably must do.

Shall it be a work or career problem? Shall it be terrible financial difficulty? Will it be something of a sort of cosmic scale which affects not just The League, but, indeed, the whole planet?

The great thing about walking around with an impending sense of doom, as I am currently doing, is that when something finally does go cataclysmically wrong, The League will say, "Hey, who called the national emergency? THE LEAGUE DID, BABY!"

Anyhow, I guess we'll see.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Suggestions for Further Reading: Some Quick SFFR

Hope you guys went to FCBD. Sounds like Shoemaker took advantage.

Just wanted to surface to point out some recent comics which have been released but which you might have missed.

1) Ex Machina: The First Hundred Days

Fantastic art by Tony Harris complements great writing by the increasingly popular Brian K. Vaughn.
This takes place in a world similar to our own. Things diverge in 1999 when a civil engineer is exposed to a a glowing green device. The story begins as Mitchell Hundred has hung up his jet-pack and is now serving his first term as mayor of NYC. Sound a little sappy? It isn't. Works as both a political-fiction tale (think West Wing) and post-modern Superhero story (think Watchmen).

This collection includes the first five issues of the critically acclaimed series.

Don't believe The League? Michael Chabon recently tapped Brian K. Vaughn to write comics based on the titular comics of his Pultizer Prize winning The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.


2. We3

This collection of the 3-issue limited series by the incomparable team of Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely is being released June 1.

The story told in this comic is deceptively simple. Three house pets turned into military weapons are broken free when administrators decide to terminate the beta-phase of the project. Sometimes the simple stories are the best.

This story is a heartbreaker and will make you want to love your pets forever and ever.


3. Superman: Unconventional Warfare/ Superman: That Healing Touch

Collecting Greg Rucka's current run on The Adventures of Superman, these two books collect the story thus far. Superior art and a gradually unfolding mystery make this series the best of the Superman books from last year. Fortunately, Rucka has decided to stay with Superman for the foreseeable future.

Introducing a new villain, a new take on an old favorite villain, a few additions to the cast of supporting characters, and more Mxyzptlk than you can shake a stick at, this has been an amazing run.


4. Space Ghost

No, seriously. Space Ghost.

I loved the cartoons as a kid. In some ways, Space Ghost Coast to Coast was a defining element of my college experience.

But, you know, Space Ghost never had jack for an origin, and he never really seemed to be much more than a 70's era Batman in space (with power blasters!). Later, he seemed more like The Admiral with a mask and a mantis piano player.

Joe Kelly pens and Ariel Olivetti provides phenomenal artwork, Alex Ross provides covers. Kelly and Olivetti do their best to make this seem like a lost Humanoids of Heavy Metal project while still incorporating Zorak, Jann and Jayce.

I know! Crazy, huh?

This should be out as a trade in early July.


5. All Star Batman and Robin the Boy Wonder

Coming in July, Frank Miller and Jim Lee present an all new series of Batman comics intended for both the hardcore comic geeks and for folks who barely know Batman from Captain Carrot.

This won't be collected as a trade for some time, and I haven't seen so much as a preview page yet, but I'm putting down my lawn-mowing money in order to get my copy of this one. We think you should, too.


Suggestions for Further Reading: Countdown to Infinite Crisis

Monday, May 09, 2005

Is it just me, or does Nowitzki always cry like a 5 year old? He always has this expression of pained disbelief on his face as if he might start stomping his foot.

What a baby.

So, The League's brother in law was here over the weekend. In a short 72 hour period, Doug managed to remind The League that The League is no kind of man. The League is some sort of man-baby thing.

Only a few hours after getting here we were picking up a rented bike. Why? Because Doug got up at 6:00am on Sunday and rode his rented bike 65 miles around Phoenix. He went places I've routinely thought were too far to bother to drive during the course of a weekend.

Anyway, having Doug here was a nice change of pace. It was also leaps and bounds over the usual visit from Steanso, The League's far less active and far more disappointing actual brother.

All in all, a super-fabulous weekend.

I am very tired.

It looks like the Suns have the wrapped up. I should just go to bed.

Here is a picture of Lucy. Doug took the picture. It is a fairly good representation of what I live with every day.

they've given them legs
dear God, they've given them legs.



Thanks to Dave's Long Box for locating this one.
DC Comics is changing the old bullet logo


to a sort of swooshy star-thingy.

I think this new logo is timely and will really appeal to folks still living in 1992.

This new logo is really great, especially with the baby-blue coloring which will really do a lot to enhance comic book covers trying madly to fit this obtrusive thing into the cover scheme.

The idea is, I guess, to have the DC logo actually appear with DC Comics product. Like, if Beenie Weenie licenses Aquaman to sell Beenie-Weenie, you will see this new logo somewhere on the Beenie-Weenie label. But it should also appear on cartoons, TV programs and movies with DC properties in them. Ina ddition, all those Batman toys and Justice League action figures will also have the new DC bullet printed on the packaging.

I understand the need to place the DC logo all over everything, and I applaud the idea and effort. I'm not sure why they felt the old bullet wouldn't do (which was a great, simplistic design, that fit just about anywhere on a cover and worked in almost any color), but that's the new logo, Leaguers. This new logo makes it appear that the designer never read a DC comic in his/her life. At least not since Brainiac was floating around in a skull-shaped space ship and was referring to himself in 3rd person and shaking his fist menacingly to an empty room while he monologued. (Good times... Good times...)

Go here to see how DC is trying to cram the logo on to the cover, and how someone in marketing is making them print "collector's item" right on the cover. (Really? A collector's item? Well, that's funny, because I'm fairly certain nobody knows who the hell Donna Troy is but collector's anyway, so I guess you're right. It IS a collector's item.)

It's 1992 all over again.

You know, I wouldn't mind ANY of this, if they would quit futzing with verbage on the covers and put the comics back in spinner racks at 7-11 and B. Dalton.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

So... Rockets didn't do so well.

I was out and missed the game. Not sure I missed too much.

Friday, May 06, 2005

MVP! MVP! MVP! MVP!
STEVE NASH WINS MVP!


Apparently our chant at the Round 1, Game 1 of the play-offs swayed the voting judges.

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Rockets win! And how!

Mayhaps they shall win again. At any rate, the Mavs/ Rockets series has been great.

Randy posted today with a surprise challenge to The League.

Go read it here or else the rest of this post won't make much sense.

First of all, I haven't really gotten involved in this whole Podcasting brouhaha. I am not entirely clear on what it's all about, but people seem to enjoy it. The League has never been an early adopter of technologies, and also finds it difficult to do requests.

I think what Randy is looking for is an episodic bit of The League existing in some sphere outside of that of the blog. Here's the problem as I see it:

1) The League's voice is sort of a nice, flat monotone. It's sort of a mid-range, droning, honking sound. It's awful. Nobody is going to want to listen to that for more than ten seconds.

2) The League requires the time between thought and typing in order to create this unique little universe you see here. Just talking...? Eh. The League doesn't do so well.

Reviewing Randy's individual requests for types of Podcasts:

a) The League has remained friendly because The League doesn't suffer much for politics. Sure, The League is willing to have a nice, reasoned debate, especially when given time to collect The League's thoughts. But The League doesn't watch shouty point/ counter point shows and would rather not add to the mayhem. And here's a secret. I do want to listen to other viewpoints and consider what they've got to say and maybe take it in for a while. I'm not sure what anybody has to gain by me shouting dumb talking points at somebody else's dumb talking points.

b) I assure you, League HQ IS NOT a wild and crazy place to live. If it were, The League would probably not spend its days and nights obsessing about the adventures of musclebound aliens. Further, Jeff, Lucy and Mel cannot actually speak. At least not into a microphone.

c) If you think the League's voice is annoying, doubling that effect by adding in Steanso isn't going to endear us to anybody. Steanso and The League are virtual voice-clones and share a great deal in the way of colloquialisms and usage of the word "dude".

And what do you mean "descend into drug addiction and egomania"? I assure you, we are entirely there already. The League spends his evenings hopped up on Justice League vitamins and preening in front of a mirror trying to get his Superman spit-curl just right. (And I confess... it takes no small amount of ego to maintain a blog like this day after day).

I'm not totally ruling out any possibilities regarding the Podcast. The largest factor is that I haven't determined how much of a hassle this would be.

This is totally unrelated, but does anybody else think that Barkley might be drunk out of his mind on each and every episode of Inside the NBA? The man is a maniac.

Anyhow, I'm not really sure The League would translate well to radio.

BUT...

Thanks, Randy! I appreciate the vote of confidence/ delusion that the League might be fun in other media. It's this kind of support that gives me the uncontrollable ego which Jamie is beginning to find oh so oppressive.

And, uhmmm... Go Rockets!

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

The League has a confession to make. The League watches American Idol. The League even VOTES for his favorite contestants (God bless toll-free numbers and re-dial).

Thanks to the power of Digital Video Recorders, Mrs. League has managed to cut the entire hour long program down to about 10 minutes. No commercials. No Randy, no Paula, just enough Simon to hear his verdict and cheer him on as he craftily manipulates the voters of America.

(Example: Last night, after a very decent vocal performance by Vonzell Solomon, Simon said, "You better hope your supporters vote for you." In Simon-ese, this means: You did very well, and in order to ensure people who might be sitting on the fence vote for you, I will make it sound like you need all the help you can get. This will ensure you receive an adequate number of votes. Sure enough, Vonzell was one of the top contestants this week.)

I don't know why I watch the show. I mean, it's a stupid show, the performers are somewhat talented, but the style of music doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. I am also well past blaming Jamie for my viewership.

So, of course, this evening I watched the entire Corey Clark deal on ABC. And here, I must get in lock-step with Randy. I'm an American and I'm an idiot, and the news magazines have no trouble exploiting that to boost ratings. Across the planet we have avertable catastrophe after avertable catastrophe, but this evening I dedicated an hour of my life to watching this sorry excuse for a human being "admit" to having had relations with Paula Abdul.

And I think Jim or Randy was going to write a biting editorial on the North Korean situation, but it hasn't appeared yet.

Now, let me clarify: If I had known pretty much any famous person the way Corey claims to have known Paula Abdul, I'd probably want an hour of prime-time TV to tell people about it, too. However, I wouldn't be trying to get a recording contract and a book out of it. I just like to share.

You can read the various reports which are probably trickling out on CNN.com, Yahoo! News, etc... The evidence which Clark provides is circumstantial, but that certainly doesn't mean that it isn't pointing an enormous glowing arrow toward Corey's camp. Corey appears to be a complete jackass, but that doesn't mean he's lying. And just because he's not lying doesn't mean he isn't absolutely without talent.

I had forgotten in the two years since he was on TV how truly awful that guy really is.

Anyway, after the full hour of prime time TV dedicated to this nonsense, our local affiliate spent 5 minutes covering the exact same story we'd spent an hour watching, then would update us every commercial break to tell us lots of people were voting online whether or not they believed Corey.

98% of people didn't believe him. 98%.

Sure, he's an untrustworthy schmoe, but what, exactly, did Paula Abdul to gain our trust? Was it the dancing cartoon cat that won us over? Was it the failed marriage to Emilio Estevez that had us thinking, "She cannot tell a lie!"

Or was it the hit-and-run car wreck from earlier this year? Or the revelation that Paula's been hopped up on goofballs for the past few seasons of AI thanks to some back injury.

I dunno.

The important thing is that the Spurs won a decisive victory and are on to Round 2 in the play-offs.
This one is for Jim.

Sounds like the League's favorite pundit was asked a colorful question while giving a speech at UT. The question apparently had little to do with Ann Coulter's views and more to do with being wacky/ disruptive.

I am sure that the right's own little hot house flower withered on the vine.

Apparently the student in question also gesticulated inappropriately, and all in the presence of kids under the age of 10.

From The Smoking Gun:
The police affidavit notes that Coulter's lecture was attended by "several children under the age of ten," which probably made them particularly sensitive when Raj queried Coulter about the sexual proclivities of certain right-leaning men.

Which begs the question: Whaaaaaaa....???

I remember being ten. (Don't tell my folks, but I remember being ten better than I remember being twenty thanks to some experimental study techniques). And I'm not sure that listening to someone blather on about politics when I was ten would really have done it for me. Maybe if they'd explained reforming social security while twirling a lightsaber. THAT would have kept my attention.

Further... Ann Coulter? Seriously? And they're concerned about some dude making lewd hand gestures is polluting the little cretins' minds?
Sweet!

I love Zorro.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Oh, Leaguers. I am unsure of how to entertain you this evening. I don't have time for a "DITMTLOD" or any of my other wildly amusing columns.

Honestly, with two weeks down of me being sick, Jamie then being sick, and Lucy being sick in the middle... I haven't had much time to ponder the imponderables and dream up worthwhile ways to waste your work day. Not to mention work.

I work at a large, state university and classes ended today. Because I am responsible for delivery and creation of classes, in theory I should be breathing a sigh of relief. But the fact is, we have summer classes coming up, Fall classes to think about, and other projects to work on as well. It never ends, people.

DC Comics are continuing to rock my socks off. The titles are now clicking into one another like cogs on a a crazy comic book machine. It's a heck of a fun time. So, you know, when you GO TO FREE COMIC BOOK DAY, you can pick up any of DC's titles and jump into the frivolity.

Because I want to be fair, I want to mention that DC's oft-less than friendly competition Marvel is not exactly run by chimps. They've also got a big cross-over event going on under the title "House of M". It helps to have read "Avengers: Disassembled" in order to enjoy the series, but I am sure "House of M" will be fine on it's own.

Nice little side story. Apparently the cover artist for one of the House of M books cribbed an image of the King of Spain for his portrait of Magneto. Apparently the King of Spain's people found out and they are not amused. Read here.

The somewhat "edgy" X-Men spin-off series, X-Statix, was pretty much brought down about two years ago by a remarkably poor decision to have a story in which real-life/ real-dead Princess Diana was brought back to life as some sort of mutant superhero. Seriously.

I understand wanting to be edgy or whatever the hell people do when they want to draw attention to themselves. As long as it generates a decent story.

Apparently I have more of a nose for controversy than the publishers at Marvel, because at least I saw that the British Royals might not think too highly of this particular idea.

It appears that Marvel's execs caught wind of what Marvel-publishing was up to after the movie-end of the Marvel business walked into several meetings in Hollywood and ran into angry folks who had known the real life Princess Di.


No, really...

The comic was, of course, changed. But it was, of course, entirely too late.

The controversy was one of several factors that brought Marvel's then-President Bill Jemas down. That, losing all of their decent talent but Bendis and telling both customers and retailers to go jump in a lake. Funny how things work out.

I know. I'm shocked, too. I had no idea Spain still had a king.

Anyhow, there's something to for you to read up on.

And you thought it was all heat-vision and bullet proof skin...
Hey, Leaguers!

I have failed to previously mention it, but...

Saturday is Free Comic Book Day

As you might have noticed, The League of Melbotis has a passing interest in the comic book format of sequential art-storytelling. We at The League hope that you, not at The League, will take the opportunity presented by FCBD and check out the wide-world of comics.

It appears every store handles this event differently. Austin Books on Lamar in Austin, TX gives out one copy of each comic to all comers. While my local shop, Atomic Comics, gives out one comic per warm body. Atomic Comics is also at the mall and has a lot higher foot traffic.

Personally, I think giving out as many different comics as possible is a better business model. It widens the chances that new and old readers will try something on which they never read before.

While at the shop, I suggest you take a look at what's on the shelf. Some neat books are out there for every taste. If you don't know where to start, try asking one of the erstwhile employees of your shop for some hints and clues.

For help finding a shop in your neck of the Hyperverse, you can check out the Comic Shop Locator.

See you on FCBD!!!!

Monday, May 02, 2005

I am sure Jamie found this by way of Doug.

I believe the Mysterious M will enjoy this most of all.

Kitten War.
You see the Admiral as you want to see him.



I'll see him as he is.


Yarrrrhhh!!!
Everyone else is doing it...





Your Taste in Music:


80's Alternative: High Influence
Punk: High Influence
80's Pop: Medium Influence
80's R&B: Medium Influence
90's Alternative: Medium Influence
Progressive Rock: Medium Influence
80's Rock: Low Influence
Alternative Rock: Low Influence
Dance: Low Influence
Hair Bands: Low Influence
Old School Hip Hop: Low Influence
Ska: Low Influence

Movie viewing update:

In case you were wondering...

yes, I did watch part of the Sci-Fi Channel's Saturday night movie, "Man-Thing."

yes, it is based upon an obscure Marvel Comics character from the 1970's who is a rip-off of DC Comics' popular and critically acclaimed comic series Swamp Thing. No, nobody has read a Man-Thing comic in years.

No, I do not know why they chose THIS character to adapt to film.

Especially after Swamp Thing has been translated to 2 feature films, a TV series and a cartoon (as well as an unpopular line of toys).

Yes, Man-Thing was originally slated for theatrical release, was decided to go straight to DVD, then bypassed that and went straight to basic cable.

Yes, the movie was that dumb. Which means comic fans will choose this particular movie to champion and claim "it wasn't that bad." My friends, it was, in fact, that bad. It might even be Mansquito bad.
So it's been a pretty slow weekend. Not that I mind.

Lots of basketball all weekend. Lots of cleaning. Lots of comic book reading, and quite a few movies.

1) Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. never saw it before. Actually lived up to the hype. I'd been avoiding this one as too many people told me it was "so good." Usually this is a big turn-off for me as it raises expectations that movies normally can't match. But I saw it without going out of my way to see it, and I did enjoy it quite a bit. Well directed, extremely well-written, and well-played. Anyway, I'm glad I saw it. Jim D. was correct again.

2) Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Decent, but not great. It's been 15+ years since I read the books, so I was hoping it would feel fresh. Unfortunately, after the opening credits, the movie never really took off for me. It felt almost like an episode of a particularly good TV show. But not like a particularly good movie.

Additional note: Two different previews of note. a) Serenity. I never saw the original show, Firefly. But this movie looks very interesting. b) Herbie: Fully Loaded. Further co-opting my rock n' roll youth, this trailer features not only the lovable VW of my youth, but also a portion of Jane's Addiction's 1990 tune, "Stop". Anyway, I probably won't see Herbie: Fully Loaded, but it looks like they are making good use of modern movie making technology to breathe new life into a concept I thought was great when I was six. I hope a lot of six year olds see this flick.

3) Show Boat. I'd never seen this, either. I enjoyed it, I guess. I liked the numbers, costumes and whatnot. The end resolution of the movie totally left me scratching my head. But everyone in the movie could sing and dance. Better than, say, Cop Rock. Not as good as, say, West Side Story.

4) McClintock! This is probably the fifth time I've seen this movie, and everytime I see it, I'm absolutely wowed by the overt sexism, the celebration of which is kind of the point of the whole movie. It's sort of a last gasp of a by-gone era, and, indeed, the cultural zeitgeist of the the period in which the film was made trickles right into the movie. I dunno. For some reason I watch this movie over and over.

Suns played a great game tonight, especially the first quarter. I did get a little nervous at some point in the second quarter, but all-in-all, it was a superior effort. Their best hope in round two is that the Rockets and Mavs beat up on each other so badly that whomever passes on into the next round is all worn out and can't play.

Next weekend The League's Berkely Office is coming in for a visit. Brother-in-law Doug is coming on in for a visit. We're sure to have a rollicking good time as Doug is more fun a bag of chimpanzees. I hope we can keep him properly entertained.

Needless to say, we needed to clean the floor of all puppy-slime before Doug arrives. I am looking forward to the combination of Doug plus Lucy plus Mel plus Jeff. And just wait until we enter the RoboSapien into the mix. Should be fun.

Anyhow, hope all of you guys had a good weekend.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Suns win game 4!
Spurs win.
Rockets lose.

Urgh...

Yao, c'mon, man.

Saturday, April 30, 2005

Suns win game 3.

Friday, April 29, 2005

Jackass.
I have a love/hate/non-existent relationship with Donald "Rummy" Rumsfeld. I hate the way he invaded a country on false pretenses and/ or bad intelligence. But I love his wacky spirit and penchant for tech-vests.

Now, I have one more reason to love the man. Rummy is slumming with Marvel Superheroes.

Marvel is a pretty hip company, and they're doing the right thing by printing 1 million free comics created specifically for our troops around the world. As one would guess, reading material can be hard to come by in the deserts of Afghanistan and Iraq, so Marvel is doing what it can with the limited resources of what their company can provide.

Read up on it here at Newsarama.

I might add that this is not quite the same sort of hokey side project that comic companies are famous for. Example: Jeff Shoemaker once gave me a "Spider-Man meets the Dallas Cowboys" comic which I still treasure. Apparently it was a give-away at Cowboys games in the early 80's. However, you can just imagine how much effort was actually put forth by Marvel on THAT one. (I love the Cowboys... I love Spider-Man... What could go wrong? Oh, I see.....)

An extra special note for Doug: Marvel isn't flying solo on the hokey give-away comics. Superman once required the assistance of a pair of kiddies and their TRS-80 in order to save Metropolis. Really. A TRS-80.

This new comic is written and drawn by Marvel's top-flight talent, so bully for Marvel for putting on their A-game for pro-bono work.

Aside from Marvel showing their genuine appreciation to our brave soldiers around the globe, the other good spilling forth is that the whole thing has given Rummy a chance to hang with Captain America and Spidey.


You know, I wish more superheroes would join me on stage when I have to make a presentation.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Mrs. League here, crawling out of bed to post this edition of:

COSTUMES THAT SHOULD NOT BE

Thanks to Doug for the link. Slinking back to bed now....
HAPPY 5th ANNIVERSARY TO MR. and MRS. LEAGUE

In honor of the 5th anniversary and 5 years of wedded bliss, I present to you the lyrics to "In Spite of Ourselves", by John Prine and performed by John Prine and Iris Dement. Be forewarned, oh Leaguers of a gentle constitution, some of the lyrics are a bit racy, but it's all in good fun. And if you aren't still a bit racy after 5 years of marriage, it's going to be a long, long marriage.

In Spite of Ourselves

She don't like her eggs all runny
She thinks crossin' her legs is funny
She looks down her nose at money
She gets it on like the Easter Bunny
She's my baby I'm her honey
I'm never gonna let her go

He ain't got laid in a month of Sundays
I caught him once and he was sniffin' my undies
He ain't too sharp but he gets things done
Drinks his beer like it's oxygen
He's my baby
And I'm his honey
Never gonna let him go

In spite of ourselves
We'll end up a'sittin' on a rainbow
Against all odds
Honey, we're the big door prize
We're gonna spite our noses
Right off of our faces
There won't be nothin' but big old hearts
Dancin' in our eyes.

She thinks all my jokes are corny
Convict movies make her horny
She likes ketchup on her scrambled eggs
Swears like a sailor when shaves her legs
She takes a lickin'
And keeps on tickin'
I'm never gonna let her go.

He's got more balls than a big brass monkey
He's a wacked out werido and a lovebug junkie
Sly as a fox and crazy as a loon
Payday comes and he's howlin' at the moon
He's my baby I don't mean maybe
Never gonna let him go

In spite of ourselves
We'll end up a'sittin' on a rainbow
Against all odds
Honey, we're the big door prize
We're gonna spite our noses
Right off of our faces
There won't be nothin' but big old hearts
Dancin' in our eyes.
There won't be nothin' but big old hearts
Dancin' in our eyes.

(spoken) In spite of ourselves
Not much to report, and I'm not feeling particularly creative today.

Now Jamie is down with my cold from last week. She's trying to be a trooper, but, man... bad colds just ruin you. Not being able to breathe is a total drag.

My brother (Adventures of Steanso) is headed off to New Orleans for Jazz Fest. It's sort of a big roving party across New Orleans as near as I can tell. He's wanted to go for years, so I wish him luck. His legal scheming only works in Texas, so he must be more careful than usual in the great state of Louisiana.

I'm finally back at work. I feel like I haven't been there much lately as one of us is always sick. Luckily, it's not my busy time, and I've been there long enough to be familiar with the ebb and flow of some of the stuff which used to give me hives.

I was reading Maxwell's recent entry regarding her struggle with a prose work she's dealing with outside the world of blogging and her online public persona. Sounds like she's tearing herself up working on thsi thing, and I think that's a good sign. If writing were easy, we'd all be reading Golden Girls scripts.

It got me to thinking about a prose bit I mess with once in a blue moon. I started work on it in roughly 1996 or so. School, work, marriage and smelly dogs have all conspired against me to keep me from ever really completing the thing. Let alone getting past the turning point for Act I.

I am most certainly struggling with many of the issues Maxwell describes (albeit, in no way in such a colorful manner as Maxwell), but just hearing her describe the specifics of what she's struggling with informs me that her story already sounds much, much better than my own. And while that drives me mad with jealousy, after following her NYC based adventures, learning maxwell is crafting what sounds like a fantastic story comes as no real surprise. She can write, she can.

I confess that I have often pondered how much further along I might be with the prose-thing if I spent an 1/4th of the time on the prose-thing as I spend entertaining you jerks. In addition, thanks to the the extremely long period of time I've spent dinking with this nonsense, I've been in an odd situation of passing from goofy college-guy to goofy working-guy, all while working on the same tale.

Experience has provided me with a wider view of the world, which certainly helps to color characters and situations in a different hue. But "maturity" (or whatever you want to call it) also makes you take a step back and look at what you wrote, and wonder "Did I really think that? Was that a situation I would ever write today?" So in a lot of ways, I'm glad I started when I did. And I'm glad I have a different perspective to bring to the table than I did in 1996, 1997 or whenever I first started.

I like to think it's all about character motivation when you're trying to tell a story. You can't tell any story without knowing exactly what every character in every scene is looking for or wants. It's not just a nifty acting tip, it's what writes your dialog for you, it's the weirdness that occurs when you hear writers saying "I don't know. The characters just started talking to me and acting on their own."

It's probably the number one thing to drive me beserk when I'm watching a movie or television program (because I don't think it happens nearly as much in books or plays as those are usually written by a single person). The verisimilitude is broken when characters simply act, but not in a way which serves their stated motivation. Especially when that act is a lynch-pin for carrying a story forward... ugh. Really, I think series television such as X-Files, Smallville, etc... are probably the worst offenders, but that's due to a bullpen of writers and changing technical staff week after week.

But after this extended period, it's tough to remember the motivations I started with, especially as you start imagining lumping in story element after story element. And unlike writing a screenplay, narrative economy is not the watchword in prose. Nor should it be. But it's also tough to balance what is necessary story, what is interesting flourish, and what is a precious baby you dreamed up which you're going to have to kill to make sure the story keeps moving. Prose certainly gives you more of an opportunity to keep those darlings around, but it's tough to know when you're really enhancing and when you're just babbling.

Like most writers who aren't real writers, I've flatly refused to allow anyone to read the damn thing as I'm an overprotective freak, and I take criticism only so well. Jamie looked it over, but she knows she has to live with me, so she's got to be nice.

So two weeks ago I handed the thing over to Steanso, who cares not a lick for my feelings, and who is going to know best where I'm going with the whole thing without a treatment or outline in his hand.

His review?

"Dude, I keep sitting down to read it and then I fall asleep."

Not exactly inspriring, but it speaks volumes. I have not written a gripping tale, but he's a nice enough guy to at least TRY to finish reading the pages.

I do await his comments, because it's worth knowing whether or not what you've slogging away on is tolerable to the average literate mammal. You can't take a little comment like "and then I fall asleep" to heart. You have to find out WHY he's falling asleep. And then decide if it's worth fixing or wandering off to move on to a different project (I've always wanted to try widdling).

I should say: Jason is also known to take his sweet-assed time to do everything, from returning movies to reading your latest opus. And if you can't take the honest word of your own brother, Sweet Christmas... who can you listen to?

I'll probably continue after hearing his input. At this point, I feel almost a biological need to push this mutant baby out. But one thing I learned in school, you can't just write in a vaccuum and assume your words drip with genius. You need brutally honest folks around who aren't afraid to tell you exactly why you suck. You need to listen, decide if what the critic is saying is worth a damn, or if they brought their own troubles to your work, and then move forward.

And sometimes, you need to realize you might not be the genius you thought you were and move on with your life.

Anyhoo, this has turned into a fine little entry.

In other news, despite a luke-warm performance, The Phoenix Suns are once again victorious. But they have to start playing real defense if they plan to finish this series, let alone succeed in the next round.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

In a fascinating turn of events, Maxwell has stumbled into the weird, wicked world of the internet and current events.

Check out this most recent entry from Cowgirl Funk.
BATMAN BEGINS NEW TRAILER

Hey, kids...

MTV.com has a new trailer up for Batman Begins. The trailer is only Windows Media. So get out your Bill Gates emulators, Mac Users.

Read up on the movie and view the trailer here.

Thank God Batman didn't have to go up against Wesley Willis. We all know how that turns out.

In other Bat-related events... after the Rockets victory last night I attempted to watch the 1949 serial of Batman and Robin, which i re-joined Netflix specifically to check out. That, and I want to see House of Flying Daggers without paying full price for a DVD.

Let me begin by saying: The suit worn by Batman in this serial isn't nearly as menacing as it is sort of adorable. It looks like it was made by a second grader. Instead of Bat-ears, Batman sort of has these goofy cloth pegs coming off of his head. "Menacing" was clearly not the direction they were headed. You can't really get the full effect without seeing Batman in profile.


Batman and Robin ponder moving their secret headquarters out of a cave and into the sunroom out back

Also, it becomes painfully clear in the first fight scene how unweildy capes would be in an actual fist-fight.

I am not sure I have the stamina to make it through all 15 chapters of this epic. After all, each chapter is quite a bit longer than I figured on. Nonetheless, it is an interesting bit of archival Bat-fun, and the serial is closer to the comics of the time than I would have guessed.

The guy who plays Bruce Wayne is pretty good and certainly looks the part. His convenient excuse whenever he needs to slip away and become Batman? "I'm quite tired." The frequency with which he uses the excuse would, in today's world, have Bruce's friends insisting he receive treatment for chronic fatigue syndrome.

The plot revolves around a mad-scientist type called "The Wizard" who is using an amazing device which can control any vehicle by remote. He's using it, of course, to steal diamonds, which the machine needs to run (no explanation given on how that works, but it is also, coincidentally, the same way Mr. Freeze's Cold-Suit works). So, The Wizard has his machines and minions out stealing diamonds in order to make sure the machine will run. Circular logic, I assure you, but the Wizard seems to have something even more sinsiter up his sleeve.

The girl who plays Vicki Vale is a cute, spunky photographer who, we are told, suspects Bruce is Batman, but doesn't get suspicious when he, say, dumps her off on the roadside after hearing an explosion, saying he must go catch a quick nap.

Robin is there, but, honestly, the actor seems either distracted or drunk. He's sort of a goofy looking guy, too, and probably 5-10 years too old to be anybody's ward. He also looks liek he's about to get his ass handed to him every time a fight scene breaks out.

Anyway, it's all in good fun.

Monday, April 25, 2005

So today sucked.

Lucy is having tummy trouble, and so I had to take her once again to the vet. I'm several hundred bucks out after an X-ray, medicine, blah blah blah...

And that's the tough thing about puppies. You can't ask them what's wrong, you just have to sort of hope the vet can put all the pieces together. Anyway, the x-ray came back fine, which means she didn't eat a rock or something. She's had lab work done, so now I'm waiting for that blood work to come back. Apparently she also had a worm of some sort, so she needed medicine for that.

Man.

She's an expensive little bug.

Anyway, she seems to be doing better, but she's going to spend tonight and tomorrow in her kennel. I'm just a little too overprotective.

Thanks to my second trip to the vet in as many working days, I missed ANOTHER day of work. I hate missing work this much. It's so hard to keep up and make up what you missed.

At least my cold is getting better.

Jim has confirmed Flash Gordon for the movie screenings in Beaumont on July 23rd.

Leaguers, if that can't get you there, I don't know what will.

Honestly, I never saw Flash Gordon until I was in college. And in a lot of ways, I'm glad it took me that long to see it. I think it took a little perspective for me to really just sit back and enjoy that flick.

Anyway, 2:12 left in the Dallas/ Houston play-off game #2 in Dallas. No surprise I'm pulling for Houston. Although Sura still bugs me for some reason. Why is that?

Oh, and there was an ad on during the game for some cellular service, and Top Notch Burger from Burnet in Austin was in the ad. They framed the shot so you couldn't tell it was in the middle of suburbia and were suggesting, if you are at Top Notch, you can't get cellular service. I suppose it doesn't matter that they picked an Austin landmark in the rest of the country, but it did throw me off. Hope I catch the commercial again, because I couldn't figure out where the next shots were done.

Damn, this game won't end. Time-outs never feel this long at the actual game thanks to the Gorilla and the cheerleaders and whatnot.

2.2 seconds left, and T-Mac made an incredible shot. Will Avery Johnson just punch Van Horn in the head? I would.

Ha ha... I hate Mark Cuban. What a dork.

Here's his blog.

Hey, the Rockets won! Dallas is sad. Perhaps the ball on Reunion tower will quit spinning. I went there once when I was six. My parents kept giving me shrimp. I love shrimp.

T-Mac is hilarious. He always looks bored, even when he's destroying Mark Cuban's good humor. Oh, happy Houston fans still hanging out with dejected Dallas fans.

Yao kicked ass tonight. He is a happy genetic freak.

Hurray, Rockets!
So, this past week will surely go down in my personal history as The Week of General Annoyance and Chaos.

Returning home from last weekend's wedding, I felt a bit drained. Tuesday by lunch, I pretty much knew I was not going to make it to work on Wednesday (especially when, in the middle of sentences, my throat would sort of quit making noises, and I sounded like someone was turning my personal volume up and down).

Wednesday I stayed home, tried to take it easy, and generally felt pretty lousy.

Thursday I went to work, felt awful, skipped out early and I have no idea what I did or said Monday, Tuesday or Thursday while I was in the office.

Thursday night around 4:30 a.m., Lucy began hacking with a horrible cough. She's a puppy, and, naturally, I totally wigged out. But at the same time, my vet's office doesn't even open until 8:00, and aside from the hacking cough, she seemed fine. "It's Kennel Cough," Jamie and I decided and went back to bed to try to sleep.

At 8:00 I finally got ahold of the vet, got an appointment for 11:30, realized I was still pretty sick, and flopped on the couch.

By 9:30, Lucy was now no longer coughing. She was just hopping about in the yard looking happy as a clam.

At 11:10 I tossed her in the portable kennel and got her to the vet. The only coughing she would do was when she would pull too hard on her collar. "Oh, it's kennel cough," they said. Told me it's viral, sucks to be me, and told me to wait it out. I got an anti-biotic (in case it wasn't viral) and was told to give my puppy robitussin. Seriously.

Lucy hasn't coughed since.

That didn't keep her from crying for no reason at 12:00 Friday night, which got her butt kicked outside until the next morning.

Saturday Jamie got up before me, made pancake batter, woke me up, told me it was pancake time. We had lovely pancakes.

I was still sipping my tea when she leaped up and began cleaning the dishes. After washing and drying the large, class cutting board, she took a sharp left turn from the sink to put the cutting board onto the island and turned directly into the open dishwasher door. This has the effect of putting a massive hole in her leg that was gross and bloody.

To her credit, 1) Jamie put the cutting board down square on the counter. 2) She never yelled, or cried or passed out. And believe me, this gash was worth yelling, crying and passing out about.

Long story short, we lost Saturday at the emergency room while Jamie got sutures in her leg to make sure she didn't unravel like a cheap sweater.

After we got back from the ER, we more or less took it easy.

Last night we saw Kung Fu Hustle, which is, Leaguers, the best entertainment for your dollar in the cinema at this moment. Great action, very funny, and a pretty good story.

I never saw Kill Bill (either Vol. 1 or 2), and I sort of got the feeling that the scenes with Lucy Liu must have lifted bits from Kung Fu Hustle. If anyone has seen both movies, let me know.

The day, today, went fine. Ran some errands. Bought some pants (khaki and olive) and a belt (black, leather, gold finish belt buckle) and an official Amare Stoudemire jersey I found on sale for half off.

And how did this come in handy? Leaguers, Mr. and Mrs. League spent this glorious evening witnessing Game 1 of Round 1 for the Phoenix Suns in the 2005 NBA Play-Offs.

Boo-yah.

The Grizzlies played a good game, but just didn't have it in them to defeat the mighty Phoenix Suns in this game. Game 2 might be another story. Tonight, however, The Suns landed a 114-103 win.

(What the @%$& happened to the Spurs, man? Let me tell you, The Purple Palace went beserk when they heard that score announced.)

Sadly, our seats were surrounded by many more children this time than the previous game, and some sweet, white haired ladies two rows down, so I felt compelled to self-edit before shouting at the refs, Grizzlies, and the Gorilla.

And, before you ask... no, the half-time show was not the Blues Bothers again. But, they did keep a theme of blue. This game had The Blue Man Group at half-time. These guys were actually pretty fun. Unfortunately, nobody will ever get me to pay for Blue Man tickets in the future now that I have seen them more or less for free.

Anyhow, my voice is gone and I'm still in a good mood, despite my otherwise jacked-up week.

Suns in the play-offs. Hurray!

Friday, April 22, 2005

Even in comics, hindsight is 20/20.

You guys should check out this blog. Thanks to Shoemaker for sending the link.

One of my birthday gifts was a DVD of what is sure to be an instant classic, "The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra."

People, I can't recommend this movie enough. Thrills, chills and spine-tingling adventure.

And in the world of politics, Jamie sends this one along.
SUPERMAN RETURNS SUPERSUIT REVEALED

Well, we all knew it was going to come down to the costume. It looks great in cartoons in animation, but in real life, it can be a bit... uh... well.

Anyway, it ain't all bad, but I confess... I am surprised at how brief his briefs are. I was also hoping for a larger "S", but the one they do have is very cool.

And, really... thank God, because I was expecting to see fake muscles or unnecessary bevelling or something somewhere on the suit. But, nope... he just looks... like.. Superman, I guess.

By the way, I dig the "S" belt buckle. If you're going to change something, nice add-on.

I'm also a fan of a bright red on my Superman, but I can appreciate the change.

Whatever. I've seen it now and I didn't laugh out loud when I saw it. And that's something.

Now if the guy in the suit can act (and/ or make me believe he can shoot heat out of his eyes...)

Thursday, April 21, 2005

THE LEAGUE INVITES YOU TO ENJOY AN AFTERNOON AND EVENING IN PICTURESQUE BEAUMONT, TEXAS


So I spent today at home sick, but I'll return to work tomorrow.

Since I was not entirely energetic, I spent the day doing a little mental homework by reviewing my Superman: The Movie DVD, and then watching the bonus features.

Why do this again?

Have you forgotten so quickly, Leaguers?

Jim D. has locked in a print of Superman: The Movie, and he's showing it at the beautiful Jefferson Theater in idyllic Beaumont, Texas. The screenings will occur the evening of July 22nd and the afternoon of July 23rd. In addition to the screenings of Superman: The Movie, Jim is also trying to get a print of the 1980 sci-fi extravaganza, Flash Gordon (starring Max von Sydow).


The League does not recommend you try this one at home...

I have some reading and brushing up to do in regards to Superman: The Movie as our own Jim D. has asked The League to blather on for a few minutes before the movie begins. And The League doesn't like being unprepared when we have to look into the impassive eyes of an irritable East-Texas audience.

I think Jim wants for me to plan an amusement or two for the lobby, but short of offering to shave everyone's head in true Lex Luthor fashion, I am not yet sure what to offer.

So what is The League saying?

Loyal Leaguers, book your flights and hotel rooms now, because The League is going to pastoral Beaumont, Texas for about 24 hours. Post-screening, Jim D. has promised the finest food of The East, and that we shall haunt the hippest bar in all of Beaumont until the wee, wee hours.

Sounds like a peach of a plan, and I'm on it.

July 23rd. We'll make it a Super-League weekend in bucolic Beaumont, Texas.

The first 50 Leaguers to show up will receive a punch in the breadbasket from Mrs. League.


The Man of Steel looks on from 50,000 ft. as Mrs. League slugs another Leaguer.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

The League has fallen ill, Leaguers. Some yucky hacking and wheezing has accompanied blood coming out of my tear ducts. No, not really. I think I just picked up Cousin Jim's cold a bit during the wedding.

MONKEYS IN THE NEWS

Anyhoo, The League has raised himself from his sick bed with a tale of caution for these egg-head scientists. Have these scientists never borne witness to humanity's final fate?

Oh, when will we learn to quit playing God?


Conquest of the Planet of the Apes, people. Watch and learn...

***UPDATE***

It ain't just egghead scientists trying to use chimps for their own nefarious purposes.

Fellow comic/ monkey enthusiast and blogger Heidi has dug up this article on the Mesa, AZ police department vis-a-vis the use of our simian chums.

Or, cut right to the chase and read the article here.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

In celebration of the the election of Benedict the XVI to the Papacy, I give you the lyrics to Ben, by Michael Jackson.

Ben, the two of us need look no more
We both found what we were looking for
With a friend to call my own
I'll never be alone
And you, my friend, will see
You've got a friend in me
(you've got a friend in me)

Ben, you're always running here and there
You feel you're not wanted anywhere
If you ever look behind
And don't like what you find
There's one thing you should know
You've got a place to go
(you've got a place to go)

I used to say "I" and "me"
Now it's "us", now it's "we"
I used to say "I" and "me"
Now it's "us", now it's "we"
Ben, most people would turn you away
I don't listen to a word they say
They don't see you as I do
I wish they would try to
I'm sure they'd think again
If they had a friend like Ben
(a friend) Like Ben
(like Ben) Like Ben

Monday, April 18, 2005

So the Superman Homepage is nuts with pics from the set of Superman Returns.

I am sure they didn't count on the webmaster for the world's largest Superman website to live in the suburbs of Sydney when they shot the movie in Australia.

It sounds as if Bryan Singer has figured out who intrepid webmaster Steve Younis is, and doesn't mind photos being taken. Sure, some things are sort of spoiler-y. But I can't tell you how great it is to see this movie coming together. Especially as what they seem to be doing is surpassing all of my expectations.

In case there was ANY doubt that these movies are sequels to the original Superman movies, check out Brandon Routh as Clark Kent.



For VIDEO of Brandon Routh as CK, go to the source at The Superman Homepage.

Word is that a photo of Routh in full Superman garb will be released soon. And you bet your sweet Aunt Gertie that The League will be here to show it to you.
We are back.

I am very tired. That whole two hour time difference can wreak a small bit of havoc on your schedule.

The wedding was great. I got to be in it and wear a tuxedo and everything. Steanso was also in tux as well, but did not cut so fine a figure as The League.

John B's family came in from parts mid-western and yon, while Julie's family is mostly based out of Houston, so there we got to meet quite a few from both sides. Good folks.

The League thinks dancing is mostly a very silly affair, but was not afraid to cut a rug when Mrs. League hit the dance floor (she is quite a dancer, you should know). The League managed to pull off "The Batusi" without drawing too much attention to himself, but attempts at "The Robot" drew more attention than The League was expecting.

Leaguers, if there is an official dance of League HQ, it is, without a question, The Robot. Yes, yes... Batman has the Batusi and Superman has the Krypton Crawl, but nothing beats the sheer joy of locking and popping to darn near any song.

The League was totally getting into his locking and popping, and was just beginning to get an appreciative audience when the DJ switched songs and chose a very Robot-unfriendly tune to play. Dammit, I had "Brass Monkey" going and a circle of folks clapping to the beat. That hadn't happened since, like, 5th grade. Or my own wedding. Whatever.

I also managed to catch up with John's brother, Jim, and meet his wife. Cool couple. In addition to being a naval aviator, apparently Jim also raises Alpacas in the Nevada wilderness. So if Jim comes down to Phoenix for an Alpaca Show (no, I don't know, either...) I may get to see he and Michelle. And that ain't a bad thing.

Anyway, John and Julie are now safely married. It was a good time had by all. I wsh them the best, even though I know they'll get it anyway. Can't wait to get back to Houston to see them without all this wedding stuff going on.

Friday, April 15, 2005

The League is out for a few days. John B is marrying Julie L in The Woodlands, Texas. The Bros. Steans will be appearing for the wedding, and we'll even be decked out in tux.

I'm very happy for John B. and Julie L. Those too kids deserve the best.

See you guys sometime next week.

In the meantime, Alex Ross is doing one of 2 covers for the release of the first issue of the new Green Lantern comic series.




Hal Jordan! Hal Jordan! Hal Jordan!
The League Grumbles about The End of Youth

I didn't reflect too much on being 30, but here we go.

On the night of my 30th birthday, after Jamie had drifted off to Sleepytime Junction, I was up and reading comics with the TV on.

Although I was not looking at the television, my attention was piqued as the opening bars to Jane's Addiction's 1990 release, Mountain Song, from Nothing's Shocking came from the speakers.

Coors Beer is using Mountain Song in a new commercial.

You can read the press release here, but here's the jist of it.

"Ice City" - Re-edit by Foote Cone & Belding, Chicago
Music: Jane's Addiction "Mountain Song"
Tagline: "Taste the Cold"
Summary: This spot, which was originally created by the Leith Agency and was re-edited by Foote Cone & Belding, shows how a Rocky Mountain cold Coors Light can turn a dreary hot summer day into a wonderful icy-cold experience.


League's editor's note: Yeah. That's what Coors does for me, especially in Houston during the summer, when it's 105 degrees with 95% humidity. It feels just like the snow capped peeks of the Rockies once you get a six pack of Coors in your belly.

I don't really listen to any Jane's Addiction any more. But I did once, and certainly this particular tune was a sort of hallmark song for my teen-age years. The tune is tied up with some good memories and whatnot, and it's not Coors' fault that this sort of diminishes all of that.

Co- opting music is hardly a novel concept. It's not as if songs other people liked weren't used before in order to sell products, or even products I don't personally like. And it's not as if performers I had previously believed weren't pre-disposed to selling their songs for commercials hadn't cashed in before.

Who knows what the amount of cash was that the owners of the song received for use in the Coors commercial? Sure, it's their song, and they can do as they please... It does, however, complete the long journey the band has been taking in consumer acceptance since their initial break-up.

At the time the song was released, the song (and band, and the album) were not favorites of the kids at my school. They could have their Bobby Brown records and Paula Abdul, or whatever. But you wait fifteen years, and while the song certainly has waned in it's preciousness, I find I can still feel protective of it. At one point, it had value and merit.

But that's what happens, I guess. Wait fifteen years and some ad exec just flips through a catalog of songs until he can find a song with a title including the word "mountain" to go along with his "head for the mountains" campaign, cut a check, and that's it. Everybody involved gets a little richer. The ownership you might have felt out of pure emotional attachment doesn't figure in. The dollar almighty speaks louder than that.

I know, I know. None of this is news.

But you start wondering... did the ad exec like this song at some point in their life, too? And if they did, would this be the fate they'd want for the song? An overplayed soundclip timed to pictures of happy frat boys in the mountains? How did they put it? This spot ... shows how a Rocky Mountain cold Coors Light can turn a dreary hot summer day into a wonderful icy-cold experience.

These are the same people who want to make Gene Kelly break dance to sell Volkswagons, and dig up Steve McQueen and make him drive through a corn field to sell Fords... there ain't nothing wrong with it, right? Or, my favorite, taking the images of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln, putting sunglasses on them and having them shriek like extreme dudes about the good deals on the local water park.

These were the kids who never played in the woods enough growing up to know that when something is dead you leave it alone, you don't touch, and you move on. You don't pick it up and swing it around just because you can.

In the grand scheme of things, this is way far below my absolute horror at some of my other experiences in disillusionment. This commercial rates that mild sort of annoying feeling that baseball fans probably get when they think about McGwire and steroids.

Part of being an adult, I guess, is finding out that there is really no end to the series of disappointments you'll discover in regards to the ideological high-hopes you established during your formative years. The trauma might come from finding out that was Dad in the Santa suit, it might be that you realize your vote really doesn't count, it might be that the crazy rock band from your youth is now buying sports cars with proceeds from a dumb commercial.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Toys That Should Not Be

Oh, Leaguers... finally a TTSNB which I may actually purchase.

McFarlane Toys/ Spawn has just grabbed a license to make "action figures" of three characters from the 2004 movie "Napolean Dynamite."

Sweet.
Hey, not sure how much you guys care, but there have been set photos and other stuff all over the place from the new Superman movie.

I recommend popping over to The Superman Homepage.

Here's some photos.

Here are some more pics.

here's the logo for the new flick.


shiny..!
Not much time tonight, so I thought I'd go to an idea Steven G. Harms posted not so long ago.

Steven G. Harms recently posted this, and I thought we could have another round of blogger compare/ contrast if you Loyal Leaguers wnat to chime in on your own blogs or in the Comments section.

Basically, Harms is asking: if you could have 6 television personalities sit down at your dinner table, who would you pick and why?

I am assuming he means actors, not characters. He probably also means real humans and not computer generated nor animated ones.

1) John Goodman - This guy has had an interesting career full of artistic highlights in film and odd choices for prime-time programming. He's been around the block a few times as an actor, and I bet he'd be an interesting guy. He never appeared in Pootie Tang.

2) Bob Costas - If there's one guy I routinely ask, "What's up with this guy?", it's Costas. Again, interesting and varied career. And he was willing to be the framing device for Pootie Tang, the best movie of the past ten years.

3) Wanda Sykes - Again with Pootie Tang. Wanda seems like she'd keep the table interesting without becoming caustic.

4) John Stewart - Sure, he wasn't in Pootie Tang, but he should have been. If I couldn't get Stewart, I'd certainly take Colbert.

5) David Cross - Only had a cameo in Pootie Tang, but nonetheless, I'd want him at the table. This was a tough one as I initially began writing "Will Arnett", but between Mr. Show and Arrested Development, I think I have to go with David Cross.

6) James Lipton - Seriously, is there anybody less deserving of their own show than this maniac? Well, maybe Geraldo Rivera. Yet, I can't shake the feeling that Lipton would be just the spice this dinner salad needs. There's nothing like adding someone to your group who has no idea he's insane.

Alternate) Gillian Anderson - Probably has never even heard of Pootie Tang, but I forgive her. She is invited to my table as long as she doesn't mind me staring at her creepily the entire time. She always seems sort of boring in interviews, so I'm not sure what she would bring to the conversation. I just want to stare at her.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Thanks to Randy for first posting his own examples, and then pointing everyone to the "personalize yourself as South Park" link.


The League


Mrs. League


Steanso



First things first:

Everyone congratulate Jill Hermann-Wilmarth. For today is both the 8-month birthday of Arden, and Jill succesfully defended her dissertation. That means Jill is now a doctor. But not the kind of doctor who will ask you to turn your head to the side and cough.

Jill's dissertation was entitled "Various flavors of ice-creams which are pink, oh how I love them." I'm surprised they allowed her to pursue such a track, but after 800 pages, even I believe Jill really loves most flavors of ice cream with a pink hue.

Jill is going off to teach in the greater Kalamazoo area. No, really. She's moving to Kalamazoo, Michigan. Apparently she's going to be bossing a lot of undergrads and grading on an unfair bell-curve. They have a very active ice-cream department at Kalamazoo State.

Secondly:

Thanks to all of you folks who wrote in for the warm birthday wishes. Between the comments section, e-mails and phone calls, The League doesn't feel abandoned at all out here in the desert. We feel truly lucky to have so many good friends out there in internet land. It definitely makes up for the all the angry voices in The League's head.

Thus far it's been a Super Birthday. I've gotten some great gifts, including some great stuff from both the real parents and the add-on parents from Oklahoma. Let's just say I'm that much closer to being a master chess strategist and Guardian of Sector 2814.

Jamie has provided me with two new friends for my birthday. 1) Lucy the Wonderpup, and 2) Mr. B, my new robot buddy. Between the three of us, I am sure we have a sitcom ready to go.

Anyway, thanks once again for the birthday wishes. You Leaguers are the best.


Mr. B says to say "hello..... Wesley."

Thirdly:

If you can find it, you must seek out Clone High. Best cartoon since Futurama.

Really, how many other shows have clones of Ghandi and Abraham Lincoln and a robot butler?

Fourthly

Falconry? You're on. You get the bird, I'll get the dead rats and work gloves.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Big cats at the B&B.

This has such a Jurassic Park/ Westworld vibe to it, I am waiting only a few months for the tragic follow-up report.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LEAGUE!!!

Love, Mrs. League, Melbotis, Lucy, and Jeff the Cat.

Hey, everybuddy - as you know by now the League turns 30 today. YAY! And thus ends the three week period of tormenting Mrs. League about what an old lady she is. Anyway, the League pets have worked up a little dance routine they'll be performing later today and it's a damn shame none of you will get to see it. It includes a grand finale featuring a large slingshot and landing pad for Jeff the Cat. We at League HQ love the League dearly and hope he has a most GRAND DAY!
A special birthday treat from me to you.

Remember the Choose Your Own Adventure books from back in the 80's?

Thanks to the magic of Photoshop, now you can enjoy them all over again.

Mad props to Retrocrush.com for posting the link first.

Madder props to Something Awful for even coming up with this.

Now go forth and Choose Your Own Adventure.
So.

The League turns 30. Can you beat that?

That means I've been on Spaceship Earth for 30 rotations around the sun. 30.

My crazy twenties are officially over. It's all white slacks and white shoes from here on out.

Have I learned anything of value in this time? My friends, I have learned one all important thing: You don't need to tip if it's a buffet, but it's good karma to do so.

And so, on this, my 30th birthday, I turn to David Byrne, who always says it better than me.


Once In A Lifetime


And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful
wife
And you may ask yourself-Well...How did I get here?

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

And you may ask yourself
How do I work this?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that large automobile?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!
Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...
Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...
Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...

Water dissolving...and water removing
There is water at the bottom of the ocean
Carry the water at the bottom of the ocean
Remove the water at the bottom of the ocean!

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/in the silent water
Under the rocks and stones/there is water underground.

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

And you may ask yourself
What is that beautiful house?
And you may ask yourself
Where does that highway go?
And you may ask yourself
Am I right?...Am I wrong?
And you may tell yourself
MY GOD!...WHAT HAVE I DONE?

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/in the silent water
Under the rocks and stones/there is water underground.

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...
Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...
Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...

Monday, April 11, 2005

Warrior Story - Update!

So, if you want to know why The League always has something nice to say about everybody (except Canadians, who eat babies), it's because The League needs money for comics and doesn't need to deal with a terrible libel suit.

Sounds like the groovy website "Something Awful" has gotten into a bit of a snit with Warrior following their coverage of Warrior's recent appearance at UConn.

read more here
Sometimes I miss The Admiral.

I'm on the phone with The Admiral today, and he says, "Ho ho! I hear your brother isn't too excited about them drilling in Alaska! Ho ho!"
And we sort of chatted about environmentalism vs. business for a while, and then we were talking about wind power, and The Admiral says, "But there's got to be something environmentally wrong with wind power, too!" And I said, "Well, I guess folks say those huge windmills kill a lot of birds."
"Windmills!" The Admiral snorted, "What about windows?"
"Excuse me?"
"You can't tell me that more birds get killed by these windmills than by flying into windows."
"No, I guess not."
"I'm against all glass in houses and buildings."
"Screw that! Let's get rid of glass in cars, too!"
"All glass. We'll get slingshots and ball bearings."
"Sir," I saluted, "I am behind your plan."
"But we need to make sure people aren't in the room when we shoot the windows. Those ball bearings will scare the bajeezus out of people."
"Agreed."
Expect to hear soon from The Admiral and myself as take on all transparent glass in the name of our avian brothers.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

The Weekend in Review:

All in all, the weekend has been absolutely top drawer.

Friday my mouth finally quit hurting and I managed to eat some oatmeal. Saturday I woke up and the pain was more or less gone. I'm kind of oddly sensitive in the mouth, but nothing too bad.

Last night we went to see the Phoenix Suns play the Houston Rockets at America West Arena. I love going to NBA games, even if I am not following the team. This year I've been following the Suns as closely as possible, and so I was very excited. Or would have been if the Suns hadn't lost to the Warriors the evening before. The League knows a bad omen when he sees one.


Amare goes up against the mighty Yao. Yao rode the bench most of the game after getting four quick fouls. Suns STILL lost.

It should be noted that all NBA games have a wild array of entertainment in addition to the game. At each TV time out, the Suns produce a dude in a gorilla suit who does various tricks, rolls around on a $60,000 motorcycle, and occasionally performs stunts, a la The Houston Rockets' former mascot, Turbo.


The Suns Gorilla has been genetically engineered to have sneakers for feet.

We also had the surgically enhanced Suns Dancers, the dude who played Shaggy in Scooby Doo, and the chubby guy from Kangaroo Jack (who, I think, is out on bail pending a sexual assault charge. Go figure.).

I had left during the second quarter to get my pretzel, dog and diet coke, and so during half-time I was available for the entertainment provided by Casino Arizona's Showstoppers Live! The program at the Casino is comprised, I believe, entirely of celebrity impersonators. They used to push their Michael Jackson impersonator, but I'm guessing that guy is less popular these days. Now they're pushing Blonde Ambition-era Madonna and some dudes pretending to be "The Blues Brothers."

It was "The Blues Brothers" who took center court on Saturday night, and, I admit, stole a small part of my soul. Whatever it was that made Belushi and Aykroyd really work as the Blues Brothers wasn't present at America West Arena. Nor was any semblance of singing talent. I will admit that these guys did a fairly good job of impersonating the speedball driven dancing of Belushi and Aykroyd, but, in no way, did they approximate the singing or vocals which have had 25 years to seep into the popular consciousness.

We had fairly terrible seats, being, literally, in the top row of the arena, but even from there, one had to wonder... At what point in your singing career to you go ahead and not only audition to be a stand in for Dan Aykroyd, but decide that this is what you are going to do every night of your life? Seriously, at least the seals at Sea World have an excuse for doing the same junk every performance. They get a fresh smelt.

But, hey, the show was free with the price of admission. And we didn't feel compelled to turn to a novel the way the 16 year old girl down the way from us chose to do during the entire length of the game.

Nonetheless, it was a good game, and despite my smack talk, the Rockets did, in fact, win. Luckily it was a tight game, and if the Suns had been a little more on, they literally could have taken the game with six seconds left to go. Ah, well. I think I owe Randy a small display of humility. MacGrady is as good as advertised. Rockets will be a tough contender for anyone they face during the play-offs.

We got up this morning, scrubbed our faces and rolled to the Phoenix "Cactus ComicCon." I hadn't been to a comic convention in many, many years. And I don't really know how to describe it if you haven't been to a convention.

Here's a general idea, though. We sort of parked in the wrong area and were walking aimlessly around downtown Glendale, trying to pick out the Convention Center, when Jamie said, "Oh, look. It must be over there by all of the Storm Troopers."

Yes. It must.

In the 80's there were always paunchy dudes in Trek shirts and Vulcan ears wandering around. These days, it's always dudes in $1000 suits of Star Wars Armor. And 1 dude dressed as Darth Maul, one dude dressed as Vader, and, we got a Qui-Gon. Hooray!

The teens love manga, Leaguers, and based upon the teen age girls running about in animal ears, kimonos and carrying swords, nobody is going to care about super heroes anymore in fifteen years. True, there was a baby Captain America, and a lot of kids were there getting ruined for girls by their overzealous comic-geek dads. I would guess the median age of attendees was probably skewing closer to 27. Lots of dudes.

I did spend some money at the convention. I picked up a lot of comics for about $1, including Captain Carrot and his Amazing Zoo Crew #1.

It was a nice convention, but I didn't come prepared for the celebrity guests (Marv Wolfman was there, and me, with none of my Teen Titans comics!), and I was having a very hard time locating vintage Superman comics.

Seeing grown adults in super hero costumes is always a sort of odd experience. Part of you wants to cheer them on, and part of you wants to give them a swirly. I always wonder exactly what made them put down the character t-shirt and say to themselves, "I may be tubby, have a beard and glasses, but TODAY... TODAY I SHALL BE CAPTAIN AMERICA!!!! WOMAN, GET ME A GARBAGE CAN LID AND SPRAY PAINT!!!!"

These are my peeps. I get to make fun.

Anyhoo, it's been a good weekend. Hope ya'll had a good one, too.