Thanks, Science!

Jim D. sends along this article which explains why people in Wisconsin will one day grow to rule the world.

DC and Batman say "SCREW YOU" to collectors

Disclaimer: Some serious nerding out to occur in this post. Look out.

New comic book day is Wednesday. Unless a holiday screws up the UPS shipping schedule, your newly minted comics will be at your local retailer each and every Wednesday. And like a good little pre-programmed freak, each Wednesday or Thursday (depending on how busy I am), I go down to my local shop and pick up my weekly stash of comics.

There exists more than one Batman comic. In fact, there are probably 8 or 9 of them. Within the industry, the collection of comics surrounding a single character are usually called a "family", and are run under a single editorial head. So, you have a number of Batman comic per month, which can mean more than one Batman comic per week, depending on if you really want to read all of the Batman books which come out.

I do not.

I read all of the Superman stuff, but keeping up with all the Batman stuff is near impossible, and a lot of it suffers from uneven writing and/ or art.

The Batman titles include:

Detective Comics (which Batman first appeared in back in issue #27. I think we're up to 800 now).
Batman
Batman: Gotham Knights
Legends of the Dark Knight
Robin
Nightwing
Batgirl
Birds of Prey
Superman/ Batman
My Dinner with Commissioner Gordon
Alfred's Totally Excellent Adventure
etc...
plus, and unlimited number of limited series runnign at any time

Point being, there are many titles, and I think I read 4 of them. Actually, it's more like... nevermind.

But one thing DC promised it would quit doing about two years ago was to create a big-multi-part story which would require you to buy all of the comics from a certain family. The idea was, they would create a huge, industry spanning event which would draw a lot of attention and drum up sales for ALL of the books in the family. But, usually, these stories turned out to be the most half-assed stories all year as more than half-a-dozen writers are asked to write only one part of a story, and only the editor knows what's really going on. And the reader DOES have to buy all the parts so you know what the hell is going on.

This means, say I normally buy half of the Batman comics... now, in order to know what is going on in Detective in July, I have to get everything else in June. This might mean 6 or 7 extra comics.

As a kid, I enjoyed chasing down all the parts. As an adult, I feel screwed.

But DC hadn't done this in two years, coming off the tragically flawed "Joker's Last Laugh" story arc. I'm not a fan of the idea of editor and business driven series, but when the Batman Family editors said "We're doing a huge story arc about a gang-war in Gotham, and it's called 'War Games'", I said: Okay. Sure. Why not. It'd been a while.

They kicked War Games off last week with a $0.12 comic, called Batman: The Twelve Cent Adventure.

Cool enough.

And then, this week, I pick up my Batman comics, one of which is NOT my regular title, but which is necessary to follow the story, and... they wrapped the comics in sealed mylar bags. Apparently there is a promotional CD-Rom for Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow inside of the bag being sold with the comic.

This is a HUGE problem for the collector.

Usually I take very good care of my comics between shop and home, read the comics a few times, re-check out the art, blah blah blah... and then the comics get put into a plastic poly-bag. The comics are then put away into longboxes in my closet. At this point, I believe the comics to still be in very good condition.

But if the comic is in a sealed mylar bag, I stand a chance of damaging the comic while opening the bag. Also, no matter what... when I OPEN the mylar bag, the comic is instantly valueless. It has instantly lost any claim to being "Near Mint." Which, in collector's terms, means the comic is worth the cost of the paper it's printed on.

(someday I shall relate the absolute horror I felt as my brother's pal, Suzannah, grabbed one of my comics and used it as a coaster... She will never know how close she came to being forcibly ejected from my house that day.)

For REAL collectors out there, a sealed mylar bag means they will need to buy TWO copies of the comic. One copy to open and to read, and one copy to keep in the mylar, which, in turn, whill be sealed in a poly-bag. This, of course, drives sales of the damn comics through the roof.

The last time I remember this ploy really working was The Death of Superman, which bagged the Death of Superman issue in a black mylar bag (with a bloody Superman logo emblazoned upon the plastic...). Then, when Supes returned from the "dead", they had a white mylar bag. I have copies of the Death of Superman and his return in the mylar bags and opened. Sigh.

I decided not to buy two copies of the same comics as, let's be honest, it's going to be my estate which will be selling my Batman and Superman comics. I'm way too much of a packrat to let those go.

Long and the short... DC and Marvel are returning to their money making tricks of the early-90's. I expect foil covers to be making a re-appearance very soon.

About ten months ago, The League ran a Halloween movie watching contest. Unfortunately, one of the favored movies from the list wasn't even available on DVD.

Tod Browning directed the classic Lugosi Dracula, and then went on to enter this bit of cinema into the field, effectively terminating his own career.

Anyway, Jim D. has announced the release of Tod Browning's Freaks.

Maxwell, in her entry to The League's contest, wrote this:

Freaks: Not so much scary as truly disturbing, Freaks tells the story of a trapeze artist, a midget, and a bunch of "REAL LIVE FREAKS". What could go wrong?The first time I saw this movie I was so uncomfortable I couldn't stop laughing. Not in a ha ha, look at the funny freaks way either. More like a "Dear GOD what is that THING?" kind of way, which sounds terribly Princess Bride and horribly un-PC...scary stuff indeed. Plus, I imagine watching this movie will enhance your enjoyment of Carnivale, or pretty much any Carnie work created in it's shadow. Bonus: Chant "One of Us One of Us" at the dinner table and know what it referenced before the Simpsons.

Oh, Bitter Irony...

Jeff Shoemaker sends along this article about the recent colorization of some 3 Stooges classics.

In the article, Lucas rails against altering movies.

Jim D is somewhere rightfully gnashing his teeth.

I know you don't see this as good news, but if I can get Jamie to finally leave me, I think I might have a chance. I'm going to start hanging around Radio Shack and see what materializes.


the near-perfect Vanessa Williams
ponders her future, as she is now
free to entertain notions about The League

Are you registered to vote?

You're probably not, you lazy bastard.

I recommend you get registered in order that you participate in that dream of mob rule, that which The League calls: Democracy!

Get signed up to vote officially here with the Federal Election Commission.

Or, if you want MTV helping you out (God help us...), here's the web-site for Rock the Vote!

And, for a hip, and still MTVish site, here's Declare Yourself. I think these are those funny pro-voting commercials I've seen during The Daily Show and other places. I love Amy Poehler. If you get a chance, check out these commercials.

Now get out there and be an ill-informed voter who votes on a single issue. Me, I vote strictly around tariffs on the mango trade.

Fake high school only slightly less accurate than real high school.

You kind of have to admire the sheer will to do something this irresponsible and wrong. I mean, this took work.

It finally happened. It took until August, but it happened.

It's so hot, I wish I were dead.

Sorry for the complete lack of posts of late.

Nothing afoot or afoul here. Just very, very busy. Karen and Rick, the parental units, were here Friday evening through Monday 7:30am. So that was going on. Plus, we had to actually clean the house a bit in preparation of their arrival.

I have to say it was nice having the folks here. We didn't really do ANYTHING, but the change of pace was welcome.

Also, looks like King Kong star Fay Wray has died.

The world loses another piece of the mystery and magic of early cinema.


even in the grip of a giant, smelly gorilla... Fay Wray was pretty hot

If you ever see that King Kong is coming to DVD or cable, watch it. It's really a phenomenal movie. I didn't see it until high school, but it's a heck of a lot of fun, the story is engaging, and the effects are unbelievable.

I hear they are making another version in the next year or so (directed by LOTR superhero Peter Jackson). Hopefully the movie will do well and inspire a double-DVD set of the new and old versions. And I wouldn't cry if they tossed in the interesting 1970's version starring Jessica Lange and Jeff Bridges in early "The Dude" mode.

Rick James is dead. Bitch.

Job for Reed if the Electrical Engineering thing doesn't work out...?

Wanted: Court Jester

I bought a hand-written but photocopied poem off a homeless dude today for a few bucks. I don't know anything about poetry. My 12th grade English teacher made sure I was utterly disenchanted with poetry before I even left public school, and, in fact, came close to getting me to disliking reading books at all.

And so I'm not someone who lives for the written or spoken word. Sorry. But I figure $3.00 is a fair trade for poem. And I thought I'd share this $3.00 poem with you. Hell, it's more than most of us ever made off of anything we ever wrote, right?

I don't know what the poem is called, or what it's about, but I tried to copy it as closely as I could. I can't make out the poet's name. But here we go.

This is the poem:

I think of all the ways
in which our lives touch each
other, the smiles and the secret
looks that pass between us.
Words that go unsaid, but are
understood nonetheless, as if I knew
you long before we actually met, on
that day. there was recognition-
a sense of deja vu. You share your
innermost thoughts and deepest
feelings with me. you are my -
traveling companion. my teacher
my guide along the way showing
me who i am and who i can
become. you shower me with
love and i am fulfilled You surr-
ound me with warmth and i am
comforted...

Jeff the Cat

Greetings, Leaguers - Mrs. League here. The League has invited me to guest blog, so I guess I'll play along. I feel the League has done an excellent job of describing crappy desert living, but one little fella that has not gotten much attention has been Jeff the Cat.

Jeff the Cat (full name Jeffrey Taylor Steans - the League supplying the 'Taylor' in honor of his love for Planet of the Apes) was selected from a passel of cute kittens at the Austin SPCA in July of 1999. We would soon realize that the temporary name of 'Tuffy' the shelter folks had given him actually meant something. Jeff was a 'feisty' kitty and would attack most anything that moved. While some claim declawing to be inhumane, I contend that the permanent scars on my legs prove otherwise. But Jeff the Cat would not be discouraged! What he could not accomplish with his claws, he would get done with his teeth. That lasted until I got a nasty infection (I'm on a lot of immunosuppressants) and then he got his incisors shaved.

All of this may lead you to think we dislike Jeff the Cat. Not so, Leaguers! Yes, he does from time to time get yelled at and squirted with water, but for the most part these days he seems to have mellowed. I am relieved to report that it's been quite some time since I last had my leg chomped. He's still awfully cute, still plays by himself with random pieces of trash, still finds kitty forts to hide in, will still perform whole backflips while playing with the feather-on-a-stick toy, and still has one hell of a personality. On top of all that - the most important thing to remember about Jeff the Cat is that he once saved the League's life by alerting him to a fan that had caught fire in the room. Thank you, kitty.

Oh, stories about Mel.

1) On Sunday I bathed Mel
2) On Monday I accidentally left him outside while I was at the gym.
3) During this time, he dug a hole and laid down in it. The ground was wet as the sprinklers are going twice a day for two weeks to help out the fertilizer so my grass grows. Normally, I wouldn't care, but I relaized if I ever want to leave Arizona, I have to be able to sell my house. I am noiw taking care of my house so I can get rid of it.
4) Mel was terribly muddy when he came inside. he slept on the tile and had to stay there the next day.
5) Tuesday mel dug a deeper hole and laid down in it, getting muddier.
6) So I washed Mel... again. And then i mopped the floor.
7) Mel came in, and then snuck up on the nice couch, which he is not supposed to sit on. It now smells like wet dog.
8) Last night, Jamie was tossing and turning, so I went and crashed in the Guest room (only second time I've done this in almost 9 years together). Mel decides he should sleep in guest bed, too.
9) Covered in fur, slightly damp, and heavier than Jamie, Mel is kicked out of bed at about 2:00am.
10) Jeff the cat sits on my head at 4:00am, waking me up and causing a ruckus.

Constantine trailer.

This looks terrible. Whoever is responsible... well, I'm not going to geek out here. See for yourself.

For something which looks pretty good, here's the trailer to Garden State.

I've invited Mrs. League and Cpt. Reed T. Shaw to Guest Blog.

Reed is headed for the final few tour dates of that mystery of mystery bands... Phish. Reed will surely liven things up around this place, and cast a certain glow to The League we've long since been lacking.

We're waiting to see if Jamie decides to guest-blog.

A quick perusal of my sitemeter will show that The League is quickly becoming the hot spot to visit when you are annoyed by Kristen Kreuk's portrayal of Lana Lang on TV's Smallville. I have to thank Jim for that. He's the one who linked over to IMDB.com for me. This has also resulted in The League finding a link on hollywoodjesus.com, which they clearly plucked from imdb.com.

Aside from that, Sitemeter doesn't reveal all that much. It's hard to know where 60% of my hits are coming from, who the people are, why they are here, how long they stay...

I wasn't so much wallowing in pity when I declared that "nobody reads this damn site," as wallowing in confusion. It's tough to know who the readership is. It's even tougher to know how to draw in new readers. I tell you what, though. Posting on the Alzare ad and putting together the words "Ann Coulter nude" on this site has drawn me more hits than I dare count.

But, mostly, is The League offering up content which would make a column which people are actually willing to read? Well, I thank those of you not married to me for tuning in day after day, week after week.

Randy suggested restarting a new sitemeter account, but I don't see how that would clear up my problem. Reed seems to fear I'll begin placing ads, but that sounds really complicated and The League is bitch to no corporate entity but DC Comics and blogger.com.

Anyway, with the completion of the 2004 Mellies, I'm feeling a bit out of steam. And as nothing I'd care to write about here is happening in my life, I am scrambling for content.

Having a comments section has been enlightening and entertaining, so that's here to stay. Everyone has done a great job of playing well together. And it helps me keep tabs on Loyal Leaguers.

Randy has an idea for something we can do. it's going to take a bit of work from both of us, will meet the criteria of both this page and RHPT.com and will take up a few minutes of your day sometime when we finish.

In the meantime, I open the floor to comments and suggestions for content. Does anything puzzle you about The League? Anything baffle you? I can answer questions, too, I guess. I dunno.

I'm plum out.

Pulitzer Prize winner Michael Chabon recently gave the keynote address at the Eisner awards(an industry award for excellence in comics). Chabon is author of Wonder Boys and The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.

The transcript of his speech can be found here.

And it is a kick in the pants to an industry which likes to make like an ostrich all too often.

Nobody is reading this damn site.

If you are reading just post a "hello" in the comments section. You don't even have to properly identify yourself, but it would be nice.

Site meter stinks. I can't really tell anything about my traffic anymore.

Also, comments and suggestions for topics are always welcome and appreciated.

God bless 'em...

the preview is now available for Matt Stone and Trey Parker's Team America.