Saturday, June 07, 2003

I fully support NASA, but how much more crap are we going to keep lobbing at Mars until something doesn't crash and burn? We're treating that planet like a target at the City Carnival.

Friday, June 06, 2003

Rick Perry must be afraid other dudes peek at his pee-pee when he goes to the bathroom.

I don't really get homophobia. It's a bizarre paranoia. Why someone would want to legislate who you may or may not want to have sex with isn't just stupid, it's fucking hilarious. I mean, can you REALLY imagine getting so bunged up that two people are kissing or having sex or what-have-you, that you spend the time to write up a law stopping it? Or ask people to allow tax dollars to be spent prosecuting for the act? How sad and pathetic do you have to be?

I always go with the theory that all of these laws are paranoia stemming from the same source: straight folks are afraid of the moment of awkwardness if they were ever hit on by a gay person. In order to avoid having to turn someone down or have to spend a few awkward moments explaining why they don't find someone else attractive, they would rather toil in our legislature putting restrictions on the lives of others that they would never accept for themselves.

There's nothing about being gay that hurts anybody else (disappointed wannabe-grandmothers excepted), so why do we bother with laws about this? Surely, surely, surely there are better ways our legislators and governors could be spending their time than trying to discredit the love between two people. If this law were passed forcing interracial marriages to be discredited in Texas, it most certainly could never stand.

In this era where every jack-ass who owns a bumper has adorned it with a sticker declaring they're Proud to be an American, folks might want to consider what freedoms they are completely willing to take away from others, those who might be their neighbors, friends, co-workers, siblings or parents.


Ashcroft fears for his wee-wee's sake as well! But he's fucking crazy, so we knew that.
Back in 1999, Simpsons alum Brad Bird directed the phenomenal Iron Giant over at Warner Bros. I'm not sure how or why the best animated movie of the past several years has gotten pushed to the wayside in favor of films like Rugrats in Paris, but it happened. Iron Giant was and is a terrific movie, and I suggest you rent it (and NOT just for the many Superman references).

Pixar knows something good when it sees it (and surely recognized Bird managed to make a movie at the very LEAST equal to the Toy Story movies) and had to have known that Bird posed a Clear and Present Danger should Warner Bros. get their act together. But this is America, and so rather than pull a Dr. Doom and have him killed, Pixar pulled a Lex Luthor and simply bought him off. Which is good. Bird now stands to have a chance at getting real backing not just during production, but as part of marketing. Good for him.

This is the trailer for Bird's Pixar debut, a movie about a Superhero family known as THE INCREDIBLES. View the trailer here.

Thursday, June 05, 2003

Jim suggested I blog upon this astounding item which appeared on ebay. I'm going to keep this short, as I really do encourage you to read the description to see for yourself what the seller is up to. Anyway, if ghosts and goblins, do, in fact exist, is it better to send them UPS or Postal Service?
Heroes and Villains

I watched the AFI thing the other day, and, According to Jim, somebody suggested that I, your humble blogger, write about it. Well, it was really long and kind of boring. I was deeply impressed that the AFI selected Atticus Finch as the best/ most important hero of the past 100 years of cinema.

But is Hannibal Lecter the greatest villain? Maybe the best played in many minds, but I find it curious that we're able to point to a hero who is able to stand up for justice against insurmountable odds and at the potential cost of alienating not just him, but his whole family, and then select a villain who is pretty much the boogie man. True enough, there are vicious predatory killers in our midst, but if we're selecting a hero based upon a moral fiber we'd like to find within ourselves, are we really afraid of finding a cannibalistic englishman dwelling in our psyche? (btw, I find Brian Cox's portrayal of Lecter at least as spooky as Hopkins). I suppose Lecter was chosen because he is, clearly, no longer "human", but a monster. He's something tangible and, ultimately, defeatable.

The threat Atticus faces is not Bob Ewell. It's a jury and a system which he knows he can't beat, but it's worth trying. It's interesting we can't point to ourselves in that jury box as villains, but I guess that's always kind of difficult.
The shack'a'lackin' shiztnizzle

Wednesday, June 04, 2003

Toys that should not be:

Chtulu hand puppet.
We live in a nation of diverse ideals and ideas. Each man, woman and child is allowed to follow their own creed, their own beliefs and is granted freedom to pursue their own happiness. In order to protect these freedoms, our nation is served by a line of men and women whom have dedicated their lives to the defense of our nation.

But do we show these men and women the proper respect? It's one thing to wave a flag, or buy a flag sticker for the back of your car, but what are you really doing aside from lining the pockets of the Chinese subsidiary which made that plastic flag? Really, look at yourself and ask, "what have I done to show my appreciation?" Well, you may suck, but the folks at the Moonlight BunnyRanch of Nevada are stepping up to the plate to show they can be as patriotic in their own way as our returning troops.

Yesterday I went and grabbed PF Chang's for lunch (not that exciting, kids... my office is literally above PF Chang's here in Tempe). My fortune cookie said: You stand in your own light. Make it shine.

I brought the little slip back to my office where I attempted to decipher the deeper meaning. Co-worker Tom suggested it has foretold of an impending and fantastic baldness on my part.

But, if it were true, we'd all be millionaires playing the lotto numbers which come in our cookies.

The FCC decided yesterday to allow media conglomerates to somehow become larger. I'm not really sure how a company like AOL/ Time-Warner can get any larger than it already is, but apparently it's true.

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

500 hits

Well, kids, sometime within the past 24 hours The League of Melbotis surpassed 500 hits. Granted, 400 of these hits were from me checking my own work , but I think it's worth mentioning here that for the both of you who regularly read this page, and for the half dozen of you who stumbled across the site looking for nude pictures of Gillian Anderson, thanks for the support.
Normally I don't find this stuff so funny, but the Superman homepage was hacked into from the UK. Hopefully sitemaster Steve Younis will be able to correct the situation soon.

Monday, June 02, 2003

And just to keep anyone from hanging in suspense, my car is all taken care of. Pitre Subaru of Scottsdale even washed it before I picked it up. How can you not be pleased with that? I drove the car all weekend and it's like having a new car again. I am poorer but happier, and isn't that what consumerism is about?

Mel is not liking the heat. I need to call PetSmart and get him trimmed for summer. But then he will look like a piggy.

Sunday, June 01, 2003

today marks my first anniversary in Chandler, Arizona.