THE LEAGUE HAS A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE
So, superfreak director David Cronenberg is out touting his new film A History of Violence. And you just know The League wouldn't mention it unless... Yes, A History of Violence was originally a comic book.
Occasionally I get behind in my comic reading, usually of my monthly periodicals, as I will pick up a few trade paperbacks or graphic novels and let them sit for too long, and then I get an itch to just read something from beginning to end, and that's when the trades and graphic novels get shifted into my reading list. I'm now about a week and a half behind in my usual comic reading, but I needed a break from Countdown to Infinite Crisis. Too many OMACs, Leaguers.
Too.
Many.
OMACs.
Paradox Press was one of those experiments which made complete sense in the crisp, golden light of the 1990's. DC Comics was having success with their newly minted Vertigo line of books (Sandman, Shade, Hellblazer) and saw an audience of comic readers aging and seeking more substantial material. A few imprints spun out, almost all of which are now forgotten, but Paradox Press was intended to be DC's entry into a new format of book-style publishing for comics. What I recall was a two-pronged approach by Paradox. "The Big Book Of..." line, which was usually a collection of non-fiction stories or vinettes around a theme. For example: The Big Book of Freaks (about circus folk, etc...), or The Big Book of Conspiracies (which detailed as many conspriacies as possible). All of this was in comic format.
The second approach, and the one I didn't read at the time, was a novel or digest sized format of comic. These were self-contained original stories, printed in black and white. I'm not sure, but I think most of them were crime dramas of some sort.
Formatting was slightly contrained as panel size could only be reduced so far and retain integrity from a normal sized comic. Thusly, most pages contain four panels at most, and dialogue is generally fairly tight in order to fit into the panels.
In the end, the comic fans returned to superheroics and the Paradox experiment mostly fizzled, being absorbed into DC's Vertigo line-up for reprints, etc...
But from that briefly lived line, two feature films have been produced. 2002's Road to Perdition and 2005's A History of Violence.
I finally read the graphic novel of A History of Violence this weekend. It's a quick read, but fairly well-plotted, if a tad predictable. I had the same feeling at the end of A History of Violence that I had at the end of Road to Perdition. It's a decent comic, but not perfect. It feels a bit like a draft that could have used some polishing and workshopping, and it certainly doesn't seem to have the meat to sustain a two-hour movie.
That said, it seems a lot of details have been changed in the movie version, including location (from Michigan to Ohio? What's that about?), and the central protagonist's name (just weird to do that in my book). But it also seems Cronenberg is taking the title to heart, a lot more so than the original author. Cronenberg and Co. are pitching the movie as a "meditation on violence".
While the comic does touch on the meaning of violence in the central character's life, it doesn't really "meditate" on the topic. Nor does the comic ever really pay-off after the thrilling opening scenes, which lead you to believe something far darker is moving beneath those still waters. But this is going to be a Cronenberg movie, so let's wait and see what the man has planned.
I'll definitely reread the comic after watching the movie to see if I missed anything, but I'm not counting on it. The film of Road to Perdition was, hands down, a better telling of the same story, even if it was an imperfect movie. Max Alan Collins is a gifted comic writer, but the film didn't seem as hindered by page count or as limited in scope on the big screen, and some of the key character moments simply worked better as film.
Nonetheless, it is always interesting to see a "comic book" movie being released that is gaining such early praise. With so many critics deriding the comic medium in reviews of Super-Hero movies, it's nice to see these other comics slip through under the radar and wind up garnering praise you suspect would be withheld if the critics knew the basis of the movie.
Monday, September 12, 2005
I'm not going to dwell too much on the fact that it is September 11th, but I do want to mark the 4th anniversary of the day. I've posted on or around September 11th in previous years, and I don't have anything to add regarding my recollections of the day.
I'll let the pundits and the talking heads debate the lessons learned and the rightness of the steps taken since.
I am amazed that already movies are in the works, that TV shows or mini-series on the events of 9-11-01 are now being planned. The day is still raw in the memory, and it seems odd to be trying to re-dramatize something which has not yet faded from memory. Nobody over the age of 16 should have to be told what was going on that day.
We'll have to wait and see.
I'll let the pundits and the talking heads debate the lessons learned and the rightness of the steps taken since.
I am amazed that already movies are in the works, that TV shows or mini-series on the events of 9-11-01 are now being planned. The day is still raw in the memory, and it seems odd to be trying to re-dramatize something which has not yet faded from memory. Nobody over the age of 16 should have to be told what was going on that day.
We'll have to wait and see.
Hola Amigos. It's been a while since I rapped atchya.
Well, first and foremost, congratulations to the University of Texas Longhorn Football team. In theiur first meeting with the midwestern powerhouse Ohio State, the Longhorns emerged triumphant. Sure, a lot of the sportscasters said UT would win, but those same sportscasters haven't watched UT go down in flames in important games year after year when faced with a major challenge.
So, anyway, it was a good day yesterday. LSU defeated the evil ASU Sun Devils. And Oklahoma finally remembered they were a good team. Sure, it took them three halves of football to remember they're a good team. Let's hope they forget in time for the Texas game.
Secondly, here's the other time sink from this weekend: The League got an iPod.
Yes, we've finally joined the 00's, and got a device not tied directly to 1970's era technology. So I spent all day yesterday and today watching football and other bad programming and uploading my CDs to iTunes. Unfortunately, tonight around 9:00, I filled the hard drive on my computer. Seriously. Jamie and I share a laptop, and between the two of us (and her separate iPod), it looks like we filled our PC's 18G hard drive well before I was anywhere close to filling this PC.
So, that's a headache for another day, I guess. I do have 1300 songs or so on the iPod now. I just need to do some thinking about what I'm going to do as I can't really afford a new computer at the moment. I'm considering moving the whole operation to the shiny new PC I got from work, but I don't know how to do that yet. If anyone wants to talk me through moving my files from my iPod to a new PC, feel free to boss me around.
or, alternately: Anyone want to buy The League a new PC? We're taking donations.
In other news, I'm still waiting for Jim D and Reedo to send along the interviews I sent them a week ago. C'mon, guys. It's five questions and it'll keep me from having to dream up new content for The League for a few days if you send along the responses.
Oh, and Steven Harms suggested I set up an RSS feed of this site. Is this a good idea. It looked like work to do it when I looked at the "instructions" for one of teh services handling RSS feeds from blogger.
I'm also not yet sure I see the appeal of an RSS feed. I've made it 30 years without using one myself.
Wow. I am tired.
The end.
Well, first and foremost, congratulations to the University of Texas Longhorn Football team. In theiur first meeting with the midwestern powerhouse Ohio State, the Longhorns emerged triumphant. Sure, a lot of the sportscasters said UT would win, but those same sportscasters haven't watched UT go down in flames in important games year after year when faced with a major challenge.
So, anyway, it was a good day yesterday. LSU defeated the evil ASU Sun Devils. And Oklahoma finally remembered they were a good team. Sure, it took them three halves of football to remember they're a good team. Let's hope they forget in time for the Texas game.
Secondly, here's the other time sink from this weekend: The League got an iPod.
Yes, we've finally joined the 00's, and got a device not tied directly to 1970's era technology. So I spent all day yesterday and today watching football and other bad programming and uploading my CDs to iTunes. Unfortunately, tonight around 9:00, I filled the hard drive on my computer. Seriously. Jamie and I share a laptop, and between the two of us (and her separate iPod), it looks like we filled our PC's 18G hard drive well before I was anywhere close to filling this PC.
So, that's a headache for another day, I guess. I do have 1300 songs or so on the iPod now. I just need to do some thinking about what I'm going to do as I can't really afford a new computer at the moment. I'm considering moving the whole operation to the shiny new PC I got from work, but I don't know how to do that yet. If anyone wants to talk me through moving my files from my iPod to a new PC, feel free to boss me around.
or, alternately: Anyone want to buy The League a new PC? We're taking donations.
In other news, I'm still waiting for Jim D and Reedo to send along the interviews I sent them a week ago. C'mon, guys. It's five questions and it'll keep me from having to dream up new content for The League for a few days if you send along the responses.
Oh, and Steven Harms suggested I set up an RSS feed of this site. Is this a good idea. It looked like work to do it when I looked at the "instructions" for one of teh services handling RSS feeds from blogger.
I'm also not yet sure I see the appeal of an RSS feed. I've made it 30 years without using one myself.
Wow. I am tired.
The end.
Saturday, September 10, 2005
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Greetings, Leaguers - Mrs. League here. Long time no blog.
So...I get migraines. Recently I've been forced to make numerous trips to our local ER just to get some relief. I bring this up not to seek sympathy but to lay the foundation for my collection of tidbits. Folks, the emergency room is a strange place and the people who occupy it stranger still. Here are some bits and pieces from my recent travels...
TALES FROM THE ER
1) Approximately one half of patients in Chandler, AZ are seeking medical assistance for...kidney stones. No kidding. One in every two visits we are treated to medical personnel informing the person behind the next curtain that "it will pass". *shudder*
2) According to the PA (physician's assistant) in the room next to us last night, "you'd be surprised how many folks come in with bugs in their ears". No, this was not some figure of speech. The woman he was treating had, in fact, arrived with a beetle scratching at her eardrum.
3) If you are an 8 year old with a Lite-Brite bulb stuck up your nose, you will be rushed down the 'Fast Track' hallway.
**with the two above examples, I am seriously considering stuffing a walnut up my nose next time we go in just to see if I can get a room faster.
4) It is perfectly acceptable to treat your 2 year old (who is there to for medical attention I might add) to Diet Pepsi and handfuls of Skittles at 4 a.m.
5) No matter what the programming or what time of day, the volume on the waiting room television is set to 180 decibels. This is especially peaceful in the wee hours of televangelists and infomercials.
6) If you already feel as if you’re going to throw up, Everybody Loves Raymond playing at previously noted decibel level *will* push you that extra mile.
7) Last night we witnessed a parade of around 10 family members of one patient (mostly children of around 10) marching back to their loved one’s treatment area with dinner in hand.
8) It is literally impossible to shock anyone working in the ER. These people have seen everything. You could walk in with a barracuda attached to your forearm and the triage nurse would blandly ask “and how long have you been having this problem?”
9) Bags of McDonald’s can be seen accompanying one out of four waiting room parties. Apparently, the emergency room is a great place for “lovin’” a chocolate shake and fries.
10) It is often impossible to tell which member of the Mickey-D’s group is actually sick. The hospital arm band is the only giveaway for the injured individual. This is especially true with children, and why it is difficult to have patience when these happy tykes get whisked away to treatment before you even see the folks in billing.
I hope I have passed on some useful information should you ever need to visit this magical land.
So...I get migraines. Recently I've been forced to make numerous trips to our local ER just to get some relief. I bring this up not to seek sympathy but to lay the foundation for my collection of tidbits. Folks, the emergency room is a strange place and the people who occupy it stranger still. Here are some bits and pieces from my recent travels...
TALES FROM THE ER
1) Approximately one half of patients in Chandler, AZ are seeking medical assistance for...kidney stones. No kidding. One in every two visits we are treated to medical personnel informing the person behind the next curtain that "it will pass". *shudder*
2) According to the PA (physician's assistant) in the room next to us last night, "you'd be surprised how many folks come in with bugs in their ears". No, this was not some figure of speech. The woman he was treating had, in fact, arrived with a beetle scratching at her eardrum.
3) If you are an 8 year old with a Lite-Brite bulb stuck up your nose, you will be rushed down the 'Fast Track' hallway.
**with the two above examples, I am seriously considering stuffing a walnut up my nose next time we go in just to see if I can get a room faster.
4) It is perfectly acceptable to treat your 2 year old (who is there to for medical attention I might add) to Diet Pepsi and handfuls of Skittles at 4 a.m.
5) No matter what the programming or what time of day, the volume on the waiting room television is set to 180 decibels. This is especially peaceful in the wee hours of televangelists and infomercials.
6) If you already feel as if you’re going to throw up, Everybody Loves Raymond playing at previously noted decibel level *will* push you that extra mile.
7) Last night we witnessed a parade of around 10 family members of one patient (mostly children of around 10) marching back to their loved one’s treatment area with dinner in hand.
8) It is literally impossible to shock anyone working in the ER. These people have seen everything. You could walk in with a barracuda attached to your forearm and the triage nurse would blandly ask “and how long have you been having this problem?”
9) Bags of McDonald’s can be seen accompanying one out of four waiting room parties. Apparently, the emergency room is a great place for “lovin’” a chocolate shake and fries.
10) It is often impossible to tell which member of the Mickey-D’s group is actually sick. The hospital arm band is the only giveaway for the injured individual. This is especially true with children, and why it is difficult to have patience when these happy tykes get whisked away to treatment before you even see the folks in billing.
I hope I have passed on some useful information should you ever need to visit this magical land.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
For more interviewing madness, Jim D. has resurrected his personal site.
Go visit his blog to read the Jim D./ League interview.
Read here.
For posterity, I will most likely repost the interview here later this week.
Go visit his blog to read the Jim D./ League interview.
Read here.
For posterity, I will most likely repost the interview here later this week.
RANDY INTERVIEWS THE LEAGUE
1) It is the year 2025. What is the state of The League?
Wow. Age 50. More importantly, it’s 2025. I guess if Her Dread Majesty Jenna Bush is allowing Betas to use the internet, I might still be posting. Sadly, my hands are now arthritic hooks from having to answer so many interviews from 2005-2008, making The League an all-interview site, welcoming politicians, celebrities and popular religious figures. Sadly, the interview with a deranged Jonathan Lipniki in 2021 led to an assassination attempt on Foreign Minister Tara Reid, and The League was forced to go underground.
What is the state of the world? What is the state of the US?
In 2016 the last election was held to vote whether the US was a red or blue country, voter turn out was 7%. Now all decisions are made by a group of five soccer moms in Kansas. Gravity is considered a theory, and most tax dollars are now going to the Julia Roberts monument where the reflecting pool on the Capitol Mall once stood.
Also, Japan is now run by an Asimo robot run amuck.
Where is Steanso?
Still in Austin. But dead. Once the SciFi Channel went off the air, he had too little to live for. At least that’s the story The Supreme Executors of Homeland Security had said after Steanso went online to complain about Patriot Act Version 27.0’s “we can peep in your shower” directive.
Where are the rest of the League's cohorts?
Randy: Jail
Nathan: Running the Bexar Co. Free Information Weather Underground
Maxwell: A mild-mannered theater manager. Of course, nobody has ever seen Maxwell and the Scarlet Cowgirl in the same place at the same time… hmmm…
Jim D.: Now living in a sod hut where Beaumont once stood before the Beaumont/ New New Orleans territory dispute of 2013. Can occasionaly be seen shooting at trespassers, wearing a hat made of a dead nutria and muttering about "hipsters"
Steven G. Harms: Somehow transcended flesh, space and time and is now a being composed entirely of energy and existing simultaneously in all places and all times
Reed: Has declared a small part of Austin, Texas, "Minnesota Southern Annex", and has opened a small shrine to the Minnesota Vikings
Jamie: Doing pretty much what she's doing now
Mysterious M: Living with her former pool-boy, Arturo, after having framed Randy for the murder of his boss
Has Jim replaced Roberts as Chief Justice?
There are no human judges in 2025. All questions are resolved with a 2 of 3 match of popular board game “Sorry”. No appeals.
Do we finally get to drive around in flying cars?
No. The first stallout of the first flying car meant a Macaroni Grill was vaporized when the fusion engine’s failsafe didn’t failsafe.
Will the blog still be around?
See above.
Is there a Mel II (cloned from Mel I, perhaps) running around?
Yes. But the experiment went totally awry. The new clone in a mile high and 1.5 miles long.
2) Your arch-nemesis has infiltrated League HQ and set it on fire.
Jamie and the animals are safe. You run back into the burning house. What do you rescue?
Wait… why did I just run back into the house if we’re all safe?
Do you even bother running back?
No! I fear fire!
Who would dare destroy League HQ?
Fire would, apparently. Or spiteful lawn service men whom I keep forgetting to pay.
3) Hollywood comes knocking. "League," it says. "Create for us - nay,
the world - the next great comic-based, big-budget, summer blockbuster,
action movie. You have complete control. Name the director (or direct
it yourself). Determine the plot and the stars. It's all about you!"
What do you do? What do you do?
Huh. Well, they’re doing Superman Returns, so that’s out. I liked the latest Batman film. I think I’d probably take the development money, hide for about three years, hire some graphics design majors and screen wiriting MFA candidates to crank something out after handing them a stack of comics, and then just ride off the development money unti they sued me.
If I actually had to execute, which doesn’t seem likely, given how Hollywood works, I’d have two options.
It’s tempting to say a mix of CGI and live-action We3.
Green Lantern. Origin story. Ben Bowder from FarScape as Hal Jordan. Sinestro would be the villain (no idea who the actor would be). Kilowog and Ganthet would be key, (Kilowog would have to be CG), and John Stewart and Guy Gardner could appear in the end.
I’d want Alfono Cuaron to direct.
4) With the success of the aforementioned movie, you purchase and
combine Marvel and D.C. What then?
I would never do that. It’s a terrible idea. They’re two separate companies with two distinct flavors. Wolverine, the Punisher and several others would all be in Arkham Asylum in DC Comics, and Superman would be routinely punished just for existing in Marvel comics.
That, and I doubt any amount of money would pry DC out of the hands of Time-Warner Communications.
5) In the year 2076, the League's biography is being written. What does
it say?
It says “Come for the freak, stay for the appendix!”
What do you want it to say?
“For tips on washing your dog in the tub, turn to page 225”
How many volumes will it take to depict the many adventures and misadventures of The League?
The fact that you think I have any adventures makes me wonder what blog you’re reading.
1) It is the year 2025. What is the state of The League?
Wow. Age 50. More importantly, it’s 2025. I guess if Her Dread Majesty Jenna Bush is allowing Betas to use the internet, I might still be posting. Sadly, my hands are now arthritic hooks from having to answer so many interviews from 2005-2008, making The League an all-interview site, welcoming politicians, celebrities and popular religious figures. Sadly, the interview with a deranged Jonathan Lipniki in 2021 led to an assassination attempt on Foreign Minister Tara Reid, and The League was forced to go underground.
What is the state of the world? What is the state of the US?
In 2016 the last election was held to vote whether the US was a red or blue country, voter turn out was 7%. Now all decisions are made by a group of five soccer moms in Kansas. Gravity is considered a theory, and most tax dollars are now going to the Julia Roberts monument where the reflecting pool on the Capitol Mall once stood.
Also, Japan is now run by an Asimo robot run amuck.
Where is Steanso?
Still in Austin. But dead. Once the SciFi Channel went off the air, he had too little to live for. At least that’s the story The Supreme Executors of Homeland Security had said after Steanso went online to complain about Patriot Act Version 27.0’s “we can peep in your shower” directive.
Where are the rest of the League's cohorts?
Randy: Jail
Nathan: Running the Bexar Co. Free Information Weather Underground
Maxwell: A mild-mannered theater manager. Of course, nobody has ever seen Maxwell and the Scarlet Cowgirl in the same place at the same time… hmmm…
Jim D.: Now living in a sod hut where Beaumont once stood before the Beaumont/ New New Orleans territory dispute of 2013. Can occasionaly be seen shooting at trespassers, wearing a hat made of a dead nutria and muttering about "hipsters"
Steven G. Harms: Somehow transcended flesh, space and time and is now a being composed entirely of energy and existing simultaneously in all places and all times
Reed: Has declared a small part of Austin, Texas, "Minnesota Southern Annex", and has opened a small shrine to the Minnesota Vikings
Jamie: Doing pretty much what she's doing now
Mysterious M: Living with her former pool-boy, Arturo, after having framed Randy for the murder of his boss
Has Jim replaced Roberts as Chief Justice?
There are no human judges in 2025. All questions are resolved with a 2 of 3 match of popular board game “Sorry”. No appeals.
Do we finally get to drive around in flying cars?
No. The first stallout of the first flying car meant a Macaroni Grill was vaporized when the fusion engine’s failsafe didn’t failsafe.
Will the blog still be around?
See above.
Is there a Mel II (cloned from Mel I, perhaps) running around?
Yes. But the experiment went totally awry. The new clone in a mile high and 1.5 miles long.
2) Your arch-nemesis has infiltrated League HQ and set it on fire.
Jamie and the animals are safe. You run back into the burning house. What do you rescue?
Wait… why did I just run back into the house if we’re all safe?
Do you even bother running back?
No! I fear fire!
Who would dare destroy League HQ?
Fire would, apparently. Or spiteful lawn service men whom I keep forgetting to pay.
3) Hollywood comes knocking. "League," it says. "Create for us - nay,
the world - the next great comic-based, big-budget, summer blockbuster,
action movie. You have complete control. Name the director (or direct
it yourself). Determine the plot and the stars. It's all about you!"
What do you do? What do you do?
Huh. Well, they’re doing Superman Returns, so that’s out. I liked the latest Batman film. I think I’d probably take the development money, hide for about three years, hire some graphics design majors and screen wiriting MFA candidates to crank something out after handing them a stack of comics, and then just ride off the development money unti they sued me.
If I actually had to execute, which doesn’t seem likely, given how Hollywood works, I’d have two options.
It’s tempting to say a mix of CGI and live-action We3.
Green Lantern. Origin story. Ben Bowder from FarScape as Hal Jordan. Sinestro would be the villain (no idea who the actor would be). Kilowog and Ganthet would be key, (Kilowog would have to be CG), and John Stewart and Guy Gardner could appear in the end.
I’d want Alfono Cuaron to direct.
4) With the success of the aforementioned movie, you purchase and
combine Marvel and D.C. What then?
I would never do that. It’s a terrible idea. They’re two separate companies with two distinct flavors. Wolverine, the Punisher and several others would all be in Arkham Asylum in DC Comics, and Superman would be routinely punished just for existing in Marvel comics.
That, and I doubt any amount of money would pry DC out of the hands of Time-Warner Communications.
5) In the year 2076, the League's biography is being written. What does
it say?
It says “Come for the freak, stay for the appendix!”
What do you want it to say?
“For tips on washing your dog in the tub, turn to page 225”
How many volumes will it take to depict the many adventures and misadventures of The League?
The fact that you think I have any adventures makes me wonder what blog you’re reading.
Monday, September 05, 2005
When "War of the Worlds" came out this summer, Spielberg was talking about why he made the film, and one of the things that popped out at me was that he wanted to capture "the American refugee experience", something we'd never had before.
I wonder if this comment will be excised from the DVD bonus materials.
A week later, and the reporters are charging in. "I'm in two feet of water" one of them was reporting today, but then the camera panned over, and he's standing in a deep pool of water on a street which is otherwise, completely dry. This is the sort of staged danger CNN's reporters are putting themselves in.
Already the snchors in the studios are asking the leading questions to their interviewees, the softball questions that, when they get their spun response, are going to let them go to bed tonight without that black pit in their stomach and that awful shade of guilt at the back of their minds. "So clean-up efforts are well underway?" "Oh, most certainly." "And you reacted as quickly as you could?" "Oh, most certainly." "And there's nothing different that could have been done?" "Oh, not at all."
Meanwhile the hundreds of thousands continue to flood out of New Orleans, Biloxi, and all points around and in between. Planeloads touched down twice today here in Phoenix, and folks will open their doors and arms.
I'm trying to make a space here, so that one day, when I go back and look in the months to come, because by then the talking heads and the pundits will have pointed their fingers, and anything resembling the truth will be but a faint memory. When we decide to rise up as a people and quit helping the people of New Orleans, and we start blaming them for living beside a levee, or for being too obstinate to abandon their city while the getting was good, I want to remember it how it was.
Little dogs left on rooftops, and people airlifted a week later. I want to recall that it was five days before the folks in the Convention Center could get out to use a toilet, and that bodies were propped up under blankets next to the living. That the criminals of the city went mad and were running their asylum.
I want to remember Fire Marshalls telling refugees that they can seat 80,000 people for a ball game, but they can't host more than 15,000 people for triage and food and water.
Mr. Spielberg, here is your American Refugee experience. It's not ending a week later in triumph with the tri-pods tumbling in defeat, nor with our hero walking to the steps of the brownstone to see his son. It's ending poorly.
As the real needs arise in the months to come, and we aren't still all reeling from the horror and the photos, and the finger pointing begins, let's try to remember that we wanted to help, didn't we? That we knew then that this was going to take work? And maybe even sacrifice?
I wonder if this comment will be excised from the DVD bonus materials.
A week later, and the reporters are charging in. "I'm in two feet of water" one of them was reporting today, but then the camera panned over, and he's standing in a deep pool of water on a street which is otherwise, completely dry. This is the sort of staged danger CNN's reporters are putting themselves in.
Already the snchors in the studios are asking the leading questions to their interviewees, the softball questions that, when they get their spun response, are going to let them go to bed tonight without that black pit in their stomach and that awful shade of guilt at the back of their minds. "So clean-up efforts are well underway?" "Oh, most certainly." "And you reacted as quickly as you could?" "Oh, most certainly." "And there's nothing different that could have been done?" "Oh, not at all."
Meanwhile the hundreds of thousands continue to flood out of New Orleans, Biloxi, and all points around and in between. Planeloads touched down twice today here in Phoenix, and folks will open their doors and arms.
I'm trying to make a space here, so that one day, when I go back and look in the months to come, because by then the talking heads and the pundits will have pointed their fingers, and anything resembling the truth will be but a faint memory. When we decide to rise up as a people and quit helping the people of New Orleans, and we start blaming them for living beside a levee, or for being too obstinate to abandon their city while the getting was good, I want to remember it how it was.
Little dogs left on rooftops, and people airlifted a week later. I want to recall that it was five days before the folks in the Convention Center could get out to use a toilet, and that bodies were propped up under blankets next to the living. That the criminals of the city went mad and were running their asylum.
I want to remember Fire Marshalls telling refugees that they can seat 80,000 people for a ball game, but they can't host more than 15,000 people for triage and food and water.
Mr. Spielberg, here is your American Refugee experience. It's not ending a week later in triumph with the tri-pods tumbling in defeat, nor with our hero walking to the steps of the brownstone to see his son. It's ending poorly.
As the real needs arise in the months to come, and we aren't still all reeling from the horror and the photos, and the finger pointing begins, let's try to remember that we wanted to help, didn't we? That we knew then that this was going to take work? And maybe even sacrifice?
Saturday, September 03, 2005
It's been a long time since I read a review that was so unabashedly ANGRY about having to sit through a movie that I wanted to plunk down my $8.00 to see exactly what all the fuss was about.
Read CNN's furious review of "A Sound of Thunder"
The film is based upon a short story of the same name of the film by Sci-Fi Statesman, Ray Bradbury. It's considered a sci-fi classic and has spun a thousand bad time travel rip-offs in comics, TV, film, etc... But the original short story pretty much boils the concept of why time travel is a bad idea right down to its essence.
Anyway, Jamie will never let me see this film.
Read CNN's furious review of "A Sound of Thunder"
The film is based upon a short story of the same name of the film by Sci-Fi Statesman, Ray Bradbury. It's considered a sci-fi classic and has spun a thousand bad time travel rip-offs in comics, TV, film, etc... But the original short story pretty much boils the concept of why time travel is a bad idea right down to its essence.
Anyway, Jamie will never let me see this film.
Friday, September 02, 2005
This quiz is funny, and I have no idea how I got this result. The League is as scary as a slow moving tortoise. I apologize about the language in advance.
You're Avante Garde Indie. You listen to abstract
music like free-jazz and Krautrock. You drink
too much coffee and you scare the fuck out of
the rest of us. We're afraid to call you
pretentious because we know that we all just
don't get it. There are few of you out there,
and most of you will probably die soon.
You Know Yer Indie. Let's Sub-Categorize.
brought to you by Quizilla
You're Avante Garde Indie. You listen to abstract
music like free-jazz and Krautrock. You drink
too much coffee and you scare the fuck out of
the rest of us. We're afraid to call you
pretentious because we know that we all just
don't get it. There are few of you out there,
and most of you will probably die soon.
You Know Yer Indie. Let's Sub-Categorize.
brought to you by Quizilla
Thursday, September 01, 2005
The story is growing all the more bewildering as each hour passes.
Sniper attacks on hospitals? People firing on rescue vehicles?
The Chertoff had to be told by the reporter on NPR that the New Orleans Convention Center had been abandoned by the police, National Guard and the City of New Orleans. Thousands were inside with no food, water or information.
We're a country with stores stocked to the gills with bottles of water and food that won't go bad for decades lining the shelves.
It's almost inconceivable how the food and water couldn't be air-lifted, air-dropped or somehow delivered to the peopel who can't get out.
And you just keep wondering, where will the millions go in the months to come?
I can't imagine. And I can't imagine what the next several months will bring for any of them.
Sorry. I just don't have much left today.
American Red Cross
Sniper attacks on hospitals? People firing on rescue vehicles?
The Chertoff had to be told by the reporter on NPR that the New Orleans Convention Center had been abandoned by the police, National Guard and the City of New Orleans. Thousands were inside with no food, water or information.
We're a country with stores stocked to the gills with bottles of water and food that won't go bad for decades lining the shelves.
It's almost inconceivable how the food and water couldn't be air-lifted, air-dropped or somehow delivered to the peopel who can't get out.
And you just keep wondering, where will the millions go in the months to come?
I can't imagine. And I can't imagine what the next several months will bring for any of them.
Sorry. I just don't have much left today.
American Red Cross
May I suggest the blog of Tami Q. Nelson?
She's a dame I met in high school who wound up in Austin where she fell in with my little circle of pals.
A few years back she made the move to New Orleans.
She's currently hiding out in Houston.
Read here.
She's a dame I met in high school who wound up in Austin where she fell in with my little circle of pals.
A few years back she made the move to New Orleans.
She's currently hiding out in Houston.
Read here.
WHERE HAVE ALL THE COWBOYS GONE?
Dude, you know, when The League started out we had this little circle of blogs with Jim D's blog, Randy's blog and a blog by intrepid American in Japan, Molly.
Molly disappeared first, never coming back to Osakatomebaby after she'd had a move. To this day, I have no idea what became of Molly. Not only did the blog end, but e-mail communiques also disappeared.
Jim sort of started sputtering out, and this summer more or less ended his long-running blog of political and pop-culture commentary. Sure, he's risen like a Phoenix elsewhere (dig around, he's out there), but Jim's original blog is dead, andI am struggling with the notion of removing Jim's blog from the blog roll.
Randy, who had routinely threatened blogicide, has gone so far as to just re-route his readers to The League just a few weeks ago.
Cowgirl Funk is still around, and she's been here for years now, so you have to give Maxwell some mad props.
Sure, Adventures of Steanso, Steven G. Harms and others have joined in the fun, but it is a sobering thought that The League is the last of the original mohicans.
Jim D. had suggested I start a blog due to the length of the e-mails I was sending him, and, eventually, I took up the challenge. I've now wasted thousands of hours on this blog and travelled to Beaumont in celebration of our mutual blogging.
Oh, if only Randy, Jim and Molly would return.
Dude, you know, when The League started out we had this little circle of blogs with Jim D's blog, Randy's blog and a blog by intrepid American in Japan, Molly.
Molly disappeared first, never coming back to Osakatomebaby after she'd had a move. To this day, I have no idea what became of Molly. Not only did the blog end, but e-mail communiques also disappeared.
Jim sort of started sputtering out, and this summer more or less ended his long-running blog of political and pop-culture commentary. Sure, he's risen like a Phoenix elsewhere (dig around, he's out there), but Jim's original blog is dead, andI am struggling with the notion of removing Jim's blog from the blog roll.
Randy, who had routinely threatened blogicide, has gone so far as to just re-route his readers to The League just a few weeks ago.
Cowgirl Funk is still around, and she's been here for years now, so you have to give Maxwell some mad props.
Sure, Adventures of Steanso, Steven G. Harms and others have joined in the fun, but it is a sobering thought that The League is the last of the original mohicans.
Jim D. had suggested I start a blog due to the length of the e-mails I was sending him, and, eventually, I took up the challenge. I've now wasted thousands of hours on this blog and travelled to Beaumont in celebration of our mutual blogging.
Oh, if only Randy, Jim and Molly would return.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Mrs. League interviews: The League
I'm shy on content this week, and you guys seem to stay awake a lot more when I don't drift off into discussions upon how totally bad-ass Detective Chimp is, I thought I'd force Jamie into helping me keep you guys entertained.
Jamie's written 5 questions for The League. Next week we'll interview Mrs. League. Also, hopefully, we'll get an interview completed with Reed T. Shaw.
Don't forget, if you want to be interviewed, just let me know.
On to THE INTERVIEW!!!
1) Some Leaguers may be unaware that in your younger years you enjoyed creating your own comic characters. Describe your first superhero creation.
Ah. I believe my first superheroic creation which I am willing to discuss publicly was probably “Hi-Fi” (which should date him nicely). Hi-Fi was supposed to be a rough and tumble teenager who wore a motorcycle helmet (because I thought motorcycle helmets were cool) with weird fox-ears on top. I think the fox ears were supposed to give him super-hearing or something.
Hi-Fi’s origin, as retold on college-ruled notebook paper in 5th grade, was that he’d fallen into a vat of radioactive chemicals. This had somehow given him the ability to generate concussive “sound blasts”. It’s not much of an origin. The entire supporting cast consisted of a bald police chief with a mustache who whole-heartedly supported Hi-Fi’s vigilantism.
Anyway, I don’t think Hi-Fi ever really got into any serious adventures as he only made it to page six or seven (including a splash page on page 3).
All of this was trumped by Peabo’s highly unorthodox take on the adventures of Batman and Robin, in which the caped crusaders used the Batmobile to drive around and pick up trampy girls.
2) You spent many a childhood summer touring the country in your conversion van. What were your favorite and least favorite road trips?
Well, in truth, we only took one extended road trip which took us from Austin to NYC to Canada, to Michigan to Missouri. We stopped at every single road-side attraction, saw every relative in the extended family, and listened to only one tape, Huey Lewis and the News’ “Sports” for six weeks straight.
I think I would have enjoyed the trip more if I hadn’t gotten very sick in the middle of it and had to share a bed with Steanso for six weeks. Plus, at age 10 I was too old to be cute (especially the Bros. Steans who both were about a foot to tall for their age at any given point)and too young for anyone to really want to talk to, so I spent most of the trip sitting in a corner reading comics. Mostly Spider-Man and ElfQuest. Yeah, ElfQuest. Shut up.
At least I saw family, saw Washington DC, made my one trip to Canada, and read a heck of a lot of comics. For some reason what sticks out most was the stop at Robert E. Lee’s tomb (and museum! This is certainly something I want to achieve post-mortem. If you can’t get a t-shirt or League-themed chess set at my tomb, I will know I have failed). It was also the first time I realized my dad had relatives outside of my grandparents and uncle.
Probably my least favorite trips were the forced marches when Steanso was playing club soccer and we would all pile in the van and go somewhere all weekend to stand in a field all day in the glaring sun to watch soccer games. Even when my parents had mercy and left me at the hotel to read and watch hotel cable, it was still all day in a hotel room.
It wasn’t bad, just horribly boring. Eventually my folks let me stay with Peabo when Steanso had a tournament, but that was pretty late in the game.
3) Austin has some kick-ass restaurants. What is your absolute favorite Austin eatery? What is your favorite menu item (need not be from same locale)?
My favorite place to eat was probably Rudy’s Bar-B-Q. You have to order meat by the quarter pound, they give you a half-loaf of white bread, and they have the best Bar-B-Q sauce in the 3rd Dimension.
That said, my favorite menu item in Austin may have been the taco dinner at Serrano’s, especially at the Red River location (probably my second favorite place to eat in Austin).
I dunno. I also loved Casa Garcia’s on S. Lamar, which Steanso, Jamie and I may have had no small hand in keeping afloat in those early days.
4) What has been your least favorite job?
Oh, God. Chuck E. Cheese’s Pizza.
It just wasn’t a good job. There’s nothing like kids given money, filled with sugar and pizza, surrounded by singing robots and video games to create high-octane nightmare fuel for your $4.25 an hour.
Look, people are generally really awful parents. I learned this on my very first job. One of the other interesting bits is that, at the time, they served beer at Chuck E. Cheese’s, which meant the parents would come in, drink, give their kids money to run away, and then toss their infant in the ball crawl. This wasn’t a portion of the parents. This was most of the parents after 7:00pm.
You’ve probably forgotten, but at some point when you were a kid you thought that adults were sort of boring because they had figured out how to do all the boring crap that makes you an adult. Get a job with a tie, pay taxes, raise kids, etc… The summer when I was 16, I learned that was a horribly misguided notion and that most adults were no smarter than the morons I knew in high-school.
In my time at Mr. Cheese’s, I was almost electrocuted about a dozen times attempting to “fix” the wiring on the pin-ball machines, had to kick bums out of the restaurant (as they were trying to take crusts off the tables), had to lemon-oil every inch of rubber along the walls, and spend countless hours cleaning and re-cleaning the glass doors to the place.
I was frequently on ball-crawl duty, which could last for hours, and required you to be IN the ball-crawl (parents, the ball crawl is the least sanitary place on earth. Seriously. Never let your kids in a ball-crawl.)
5) If we ever leave Arizona, what will you miss most about the Valley of the Sun?
I am going to miss… Nothing is coming to me. I dunno. I'd say The Suns, but hopefully I'd have Spurs and Rockets games in Texas, or another team to follow where ever we might land.
I do have some good co-workers, a nice parking spot, and lots of good places to eat lunch.
I'm shy on content this week, and you guys seem to stay awake a lot more when I don't drift off into discussions upon how totally bad-ass Detective Chimp is, I thought I'd force Jamie into helping me keep you guys entertained.
Jamie's written 5 questions for The League. Next week we'll interview Mrs. League. Also, hopefully, we'll get an interview completed with Reed T. Shaw.
Don't forget, if you want to be interviewed, just let me know.
On to THE INTERVIEW!!!
1) Some Leaguers may be unaware that in your younger years you enjoyed creating your own comic characters. Describe your first superhero creation.
Ah. I believe my first superheroic creation which I am willing to discuss publicly was probably “Hi-Fi” (which should date him nicely). Hi-Fi was supposed to be a rough and tumble teenager who wore a motorcycle helmet (because I thought motorcycle helmets were cool) with weird fox-ears on top. I think the fox ears were supposed to give him super-hearing or something.
Hi-Fi’s origin, as retold on college-ruled notebook paper in 5th grade, was that he’d fallen into a vat of radioactive chemicals. This had somehow given him the ability to generate concussive “sound blasts”. It’s not much of an origin. The entire supporting cast consisted of a bald police chief with a mustache who whole-heartedly supported Hi-Fi’s vigilantism.
Anyway, I don’t think Hi-Fi ever really got into any serious adventures as he only made it to page six or seven (including a splash page on page 3).
All of this was trumped by Peabo’s highly unorthodox take on the adventures of Batman and Robin, in which the caped crusaders used the Batmobile to drive around and pick up trampy girls.
2) You spent many a childhood summer touring the country in your conversion van. What were your favorite and least favorite road trips?
Well, in truth, we only took one extended road trip which took us from Austin to NYC to Canada, to Michigan to Missouri. We stopped at every single road-side attraction, saw every relative in the extended family, and listened to only one tape, Huey Lewis and the News’ “Sports” for six weeks straight.
I think I would have enjoyed the trip more if I hadn’t gotten very sick in the middle of it and had to share a bed with Steanso for six weeks. Plus, at age 10 I was too old to be cute (especially the Bros. Steans who both were about a foot to tall for their age at any given point)and too young for anyone to really want to talk to, so I spent most of the trip sitting in a corner reading comics. Mostly Spider-Man and ElfQuest. Yeah, ElfQuest. Shut up.
At least I saw family, saw Washington DC, made my one trip to Canada, and read a heck of a lot of comics. For some reason what sticks out most was the stop at Robert E. Lee’s tomb (and museum! This is certainly something I want to achieve post-mortem. If you can’t get a t-shirt or League-themed chess set at my tomb, I will know I have failed). It was also the first time I realized my dad had relatives outside of my grandparents and uncle.
Probably my least favorite trips were the forced marches when Steanso was playing club soccer and we would all pile in the van and go somewhere all weekend to stand in a field all day in the glaring sun to watch soccer games. Even when my parents had mercy and left me at the hotel to read and watch hotel cable, it was still all day in a hotel room.
It wasn’t bad, just horribly boring. Eventually my folks let me stay with Peabo when Steanso had a tournament, but that was pretty late in the game.
3) Austin has some kick-ass restaurants. What is your absolute favorite Austin eatery? What is your favorite menu item (need not be from same locale)?
My favorite place to eat was probably Rudy’s Bar-B-Q. You have to order meat by the quarter pound, they give you a half-loaf of white bread, and they have the best Bar-B-Q sauce in the 3rd Dimension.
That said, my favorite menu item in Austin may have been the taco dinner at Serrano’s, especially at the Red River location (probably my second favorite place to eat in Austin).
I dunno. I also loved Casa Garcia’s on S. Lamar, which Steanso, Jamie and I may have had no small hand in keeping afloat in those early days.
4) What has been your least favorite job?
Oh, God. Chuck E. Cheese’s Pizza.
It just wasn’t a good job. There’s nothing like kids given money, filled with sugar and pizza, surrounded by singing robots and video games to create high-octane nightmare fuel for your $4.25 an hour.
Look, people are generally really awful parents. I learned this on my very first job. One of the other interesting bits is that, at the time, they served beer at Chuck E. Cheese’s, which meant the parents would come in, drink, give their kids money to run away, and then toss their infant in the ball crawl. This wasn’t a portion of the parents. This was most of the parents after 7:00pm.
You’ve probably forgotten, but at some point when you were a kid you thought that adults were sort of boring because they had figured out how to do all the boring crap that makes you an adult. Get a job with a tie, pay taxes, raise kids, etc… The summer when I was 16, I learned that was a horribly misguided notion and that most adults were no smarter than the morons I knew in high-school.
In my time at Mr. Cheese’s, I was almost electrocuted about a dozen times attempting to “fix” the wiring on the pin-ball machines, had to kick bums out of the restaurant (as they were trying to take crusts off the tables), had to lemon-oil every inch of rubber along the walls, and spend countless hours cleaning and re-cleaning the glass doors to the place.
I was frequently on ball-crawl duty, which could last for hours, and required you to be IN the ball-crawl (parents, the ball crawl is the least sanitary place on earth. Seriously. Never let your kids in a ball-crawl.)
5) If we ever leave Arizona, what will you miss most about the Valley of the Sun?
I am going to miss… Nothing is coming to me. I dunno. I'd say The Suns, but hopefully I'd have Spurs and Rockets games in Texas, or another team to follow where ever we might land.
I do have some good co-workers, a nice parking spot, and lots of good places to eat lunch.
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
THE NATHAN CONE INTERVIEW
I met Nathan in 1993 sometime toward the end of his senior year of high school. I had seen him play at the 1993 Klein Oak High School battle of the bands, affectionately known as "OakStock".
Nathan played in a band with my fellow actor, Frank, and at some point we were introduced.
That fall, Nathan attended Trinity University in the Alamo City, where Steanso was going (after having refused to move with the rest of the Family Steans when we picked up stakes and moved to Houston). Nathan, Frank and Steanso played in uber-band "The Stray Toasters". After Frank and Steanso disappeared, Nathan transmorgified "Stray Toasters" into an all-purpose jazz-rock-funk-everything but the kitchen sink sort of band.
Jamie also ended up being pals with Nathan at Trinity, and so all of us continued to hang out a great deal.
It came to pass that Nathan's days in the booth at the Trinity radio station qualified him for a career in broadcast. He became a popular DJ on Texas Public radio in San Antonio. He's still the voice of TPR, but he's also involved in programming for the station and the film festivals sponsored by the station.
Nathan once appeared eyeball-to-eyeball with Regis on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" during the height of the program's popularity. Nathan missed a very, very difficult question regarding the geography of Myanmar or something.
I went to Nathan and Renata's wedding several years ago, which was an amazing affair. You sort of had to have been there, but it was really lovely.
Not so long ago Renata and Nathan had a lovely daughter, Samantha. She's already a proud Spurs fan.
Since 1993 the enigmatic Nathan Cone has always been around. Somewhere. Usually listening to Miles.
And now, THE NATHAN CONE INTERVIEW
1) You're known to occasionally enjoy some music.
What was the first album you spent money on? When was the last time you listened to it? Really? Why has it been so long?
ANSWER: The first album I remember spending my very own money on was the J. Geils Band's "Freeze Frame." I haven't listened to it in ages since I lost the cassette long ago and never replaced it. Other than the singles from the album (Freeze Frame and Centerfold), I really don't remember at all what the rest of the album sounded like. The next oldest cassette/album in my collection is probably Buckner & Garcia's "Pac-Man Fever." The first CD I ever bought was Def Leppard's "Pyromania," in 1987. I sold it a few years later. The oldest two compact discs that are still in my collection are Pink Floyd's "The Wall" and Iron Maiden's "Somewhere In Time."
2) You're suddenly 17, a senior at KOHS, and guitar player for OakStock favorite, The Barnyard Commandos.
a) Who is your hero?
b) What is your goal when you reach Trinity U?
c) Can you explain Frank to a stranger on the street?
ANSWERS:
a) As a Barnyard Commandos guitarist, my musical heroes at the time would probably be the Ramones and the Beatles. I'm not sure I had a hero outside the music world at the time.
b) My goal when I reach Trinity is to get on the radio station ASAP, and to start up a new band with Frank and Steanso.
c) gffrtenfk3. fndklL~~!! CDNFC(#cdnjkcsn0cew.
3) You're a new father of a darling young girl. It's now 2018 and young Samantha has just arrived home from eSchool on the Hover Bus.
She is a huge fan of the latest boy band craze, "The Sugar Laddies".
What do you do?
ANSWER: Why does she need to leave the house if she's going to eSchool?
Ah, but to answer your question. She will be eight years old. Hmm. (editor's note: She will be 13. But I also called Samantha "Meredith" in my first attempt at this question)
Either wait for her to grow out of the Sugar Laddies phase, or show her "A Hard Day's Night" and watch the magic happen.
4) Amazingly, you've been transported through time to 62 A.D. Sadly, you were captured wandering around outside of Rome, and are being forced to battle in a
gladiatorial arena in a fight to the death.
Luckily, those Romans aren't totally stone-hearted. They've given you a choice of what sort of animal you shall fight to the death.
Ostrich
Tiger
Crocodile
Rhino
furious badger
Why?
Do you think you'd win?
How long do you think the fight would last?
ANSWER: Gosh, as much as I hate the idea of slaughter, I must ask, do I get a sword? (editor's note: I'd prefer a trident and net, but, sure... you get a sword and dagger)
If so, I think I would choose the ostrich, and go for the legs as it charges me. Of course, I'm not as speedy as I used to be, and I could get trampled. I'd give the fight five minutes, either way. Then if I survive, I'd congratulate Caesar for providing a convenient way to let folks know whether a movie is bad or good.
5) I first met Renata on December 31st, 1999. She's a nifty chick. But that's not when you met her.
Renata: How and why?
ANSWER: Like many others around the nation, I met my future spouse at work.
We talked, and I learned that she is a smart, strong-willed, lovely woman.
I have learned much from her. Oh, and she's super-purty. And as I suspected, she's a great mother.
INTERVIEW END
I met Nathan in 1993 sometime toward the end of his senior year of high school. I had seen him play at the 1993 Klein Oak High School battle of the bands, affectionately known as "OakStock".
Nathan played in a band with my fellow actor, Frank, and at some point we were introduced.
That fall, Nathan attended Trinity University in the Alamo City, where Steanso was going (after having refused to move with the rest of the Family Steans when we picked up stakes and moved to Houston). Nathan, Frank and Steanso played in uber-band "The Stray Toasters". After Frank and Steanso disappeared, Nathan transmorgified "Stray Toasters" into an all-purpose jazz-rock-funk-everything but the kitchen sink sort of band.
Jamie also ended up being pals with Nathan at Trinity, and so all of us continued to hang out a great deal.
It came to pass that Nathan's days in the booth at the Trinity radio station qualified him for a career in broadcast. He became a popular DJ on Texas Public radio in San Antonio. He's still the voice of TPR, but he's also involved in programming for the station and the film festivals sponsored by the station.
Nathan once appeared eyeball-to-eyeball with Regis on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" during the height of the program's popularity. Nathan missed a very, very difficult question regarding the geography of Myanmar or something.
I went to Nathan and Renata's wedding several years ago, which was an amazing affair. You sort of had to have been there, but it was really lovely.
Not so long ago Renata and Nathan had a lovely daughter, Samantha. She's already a proud Spurs fan.
Since 1993 the enigmatic Nathan Cone has always been around. Somewhere. Usually listening to Miles.
And now, THE NATHAN CONE INTERVIEW
1) You're known to occasionally enjoy some music.
What was the first album you spent money on? When was the last time you listened to it? Really? Why has it been so long?
ANSWER: The first album I remember spending my very own money on was the J. Geils Band's "Freeze Frame." I haven't listened to it in ages since I lost the cassette long ago and never replaced it. Other than the singles from the album (Freeze Frame and Centerfold), I really don't remember at all what the rest of the album sounded like. The next oldest cassette/album in my collection is probably Buckner & Garcia's "Pac-Man Fever." The first CD I ever bought was Def Leppard's "Pyromania," in 1987. I sold it a few years later. The oldest two compact discs that are still in my collection are Pink Floyd's "The Wall" and Iron Maiden's "Somewhere In Time."
2) You're suddenly 17, a senior at KOHS, and guitar player for OakStock favorite, The Barnyard Commandos.
a) Who is your hero?
b) What is your goal when you reach Trinity U?
c) Can you explain Frank to a stranger on the street?
ANSWERS:
a) As a Barnyard Commandos guitarist, my musical heroes at the time would probably be the Ramones and the Beatles. I'm not sure I had a hero outside the music world at the time.
b) My goal when I reach Trinity is to get on the radio station ASAP, and to start up a new band with Frank and Steanso.
c) gffrtenfk3. fndklL~~!! CDNFC(#cdnjkcsn0cew.
3) You're a new father of a darling young girl. It's now 2018 and young Samantha has just arrived home from eSchool on the Hover Bus.
She is a huge fan of the latest boy band craze, "The Sugar Laddies".
What do you do?
ANSWER: Why does she need to leave the house if she's going to eSchool?
Ah, but to answer your question. She will be eight years old. Hmm. (editor's note: She will be 13. But I also called Samantha "Meredith" in my first attempt at this question)
Either wait for her to grow out of the Sugar Laddies phase, or show her "A Hard Day's Night" and watch the magic happen.
4) Amazingly, you've been transported through time to 62 A.D. Sadly, you were captured wandering around outside of Rome, and are being forced to battle in a
gladiatorial arena in a fight to the death.
Luckily, those Romans aren't totally stone-hearted. They've given you a choice of what sort of animal you shall fight to the death.
Ostrich
Tiger
Crocodile
Rhino
furious badger
Why?
Do you think you'd win?
How long do you think the fight would last?
ANSWER: Gosh, as much as I hate the idea of slaughter, I must ask, do I get a sword? (editor's note: I'd prefer a trident and net, but, sure... you get a sword and dagger)
If so, I think I would choose the ostrich, and go for the legs as it charges me. Of course, I'm not as speedy as I used to be, and I could get trampled. I'd give the fight five minutes, either way. Then if I survive, I'd congratulate Caesar for providing a convenient way to let folks know whether a movie is bad or good.
5) I first met Renata on December 31st, 1999. She's a nifty chick. But that's not when you met her.
Renata: How and why?
ANSWER: Like many others around the nation, I met my future spouse at work.
We talked, and I learned that she is a smart, strong-willed, lovely woman.
I have learned much from her. Oh, and she's super-purty. And as I suspected, she's a great mother.
INTERVIEW END
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