League of Melbotis

KUDOS to my beautiful wife, Jamie, for forwarding this to me. It may come as s urprise to leaguers that I am a fan of Superman. Yes, yes... it's true. And as far as that fandom goes, I have missed only one episode of the WB's show "Smallville", which tells the story of a young Clark Kent before he puts on the cape.

I know Sonia will appreciate this. You see, the primary love interest for young Clark Kent is INCREDIBLY annoying, but part of the WB's plan for the show was to get as many 10-17 year old girls watching the show as males who want to watch Superman punch people (which he often does, with much gusto). So the WB seems to insist that the girls will LOVE to watch Lana. Which is annoying. I cannot detail how annoying the character of Lana Lang really is, but the fact that her trampling by a horse was applauded by a large portion of the audience goes to show you that Lana is not what much of the audience believes makes Smallville shine.

No, it's Lex Luthor we love.


Lana is the annoying one on the left...

I once detailed 9 reasons why Lana is annoying, and here they are:

1) 15 year old kids don't get to own coffee shops and go to high school
2) She learned kung-fu in half an episode and now routinely dispatches crooks with her skills, despite lack of training time due to her school/ coffee shop/ pony riding schedule
3) she has no legal guardian
4) she owns a pony she doesn't need to ever take care of or pay for or feed
5) she basically dumps all over a dude with heat vision and he puts up with it
6) she continues to surprise Clark by showing up at his house every single night when he's in the barn, and he's always surprised to see her
7) Evil genius Lex is investing in Lana's dumb coffeeshop with the only semi-used theater in back
8) Notice how Lex and Clark will be talking about saving the corn chowder plant and hundreds of jobs, or trying to stop a maniacal killer, and Lana makes sure EVERYONE knows about her dumb problem with the latte machine or whatever. Seriously. Nobody ever asks. She always just volunteers the information. Poor Lana.
9) somehow she owns a Jeep Liberty. Coffee shop must be doing well.

There are dozens of more reasons to dislike Lana, but the number one reason is that there's a much more interesting and less whiney character on the show, and we're to believe Clark is still infatuated with this dork? Come on, WB!!! Even in a show with a dude who can see through walls, we need a little believability.