League of Melbotis

BRITNEY WATCH!!!!


I've actually learned to say "NO!" With this newly found freedom, its like people don't know how to act around me. Should we talk to her like we did when she was 16 or like the Icon everyone says she is?

hell, yes.

Read the letter here, ya'll.

Ms Federline is now officially biting the hand which feeds her, and her wilting self-doubt barely taps the unchecked insanity which she has been force fed since 1999.

Unintentionally turning on her fanbase, and the entertainment pseudo-press in one poorly structured sentence, Ms Federline had this to say: My prerogative right now is to just chill and let all the other overexposed blondes on the cover of Us Weekly (magazine) be your entertainment.

Her prerogative? And, yes... she did, in fact, just cover the late 80's Bobby Brown hit. Will she see the path Whitney and Bobby took as an admirable one, or the Scarface-like ridiculousness it has become?

A note to Mr. Federline:

Dear Mr. Federline,

Will you please quit teasing us? Please cut to the chase and ask Britney to cut off all contact with her family. We all know this will happen, and we do not have even 4 months to wait for it. Please expedite this step so that we can reach your ugly divorce as soon as possible.

Sincerely,

The League of Melbotis


Britney continues her own letter, appealing to, I guess, Hilary Duff: It's amazing what advisors will push you to do, even if it means taking a naive, young, blonde girl & putting her on the cover of every magazine.

Clearly Ms. Federline has visited the Wallace Theater by my house, which is little more than a temple to Duff.

The League wishes Ms. Federline an enjoyable vacation, and expects that, when done chillin', her legion of 12 year-old fans will have placed themselves in carbon freeze so as to ensure they do not move on to the next blonde pop sensation, nor shall they emotionally or intellectually develop to a point where they may not enjoy Ms. Federline's musical stylings.

I leave you with this bit of theological insight from Ms. Federline, whose wisdom knows no bounds... Truly, He works in mysterious ways.

I know now that my knee gave out on me this past summer so that I would have no choice but to stop. My body was shutting down and needed rest. It's funny how the Man upstairs works. Right now, I have to go-- I really want to watch "Saved" with Mandy Moore and re-runs of "Sex and the City."