RANDY REVIEWS GARFIELD: THE MOVIE

Greeting, Leaguers!
A few months ago I threw down the gauntlet and challenged Jim D. and Randy to not only go see the new feature, Garfield: The Movie, but to write a review.

Well, Jim got a bit weak in the knees at the idea and went running back to his Bergman films. Randy, however, downed a bottle of Maalox and headed down to his local cinema.

I now owe Randy the ticket price and a debt of gratitude. He's saved us all a lot of trouble.


Garfield peers into the depths of Randy's beleaguered soul...

BEGIN RANDY REVIEW:

A few months ago, The League challenged Counselor and me to watch and review Garfield: The Movie. Counselor was unable to lower his standards long enough to view the film, but I have no such qualms. So yesterday, Emily and I trekked to our local mega-multiplex and viewed the movie. Per The League, I present my 500+-word review.

Like many children of the 80s, I grew up with Garfield. I recalled having dozens of Garfield books and watching his cartoons. I even received a Garfield phone for my Christmas one year. However, I was not excited about Garfield: The Movie when I heard about it. Instead, disappointment overcame me. It did not help matters that the Garfield in the movie is computer generated. I was used to the cartoon, 2D, Garfield. My inner child rejected the new-fangled 3D Garfield.

It was with this mindset I viewed the movie.

Garfield: The Movie does not compare to Garfield and Friends. No, Garfield and Friends is much better. Unlike other CGI characters such as Shrek, Nemo, Woody, and Buzz Lightyear, this Garfield is not very lovable. The cat is neither particularly cute nor adorable. In fact, the movie Garfield is rather irritating. Even Bill Murray – who voices Garfield – cannot save the character or the film. In fact, the human actors in the film – the two principles being Breckin Meyer as Jon Arbuckle and Jennifer Love Hewitt as Liz the Vet – are horrible. They, and the rest of the cast, look embarrassed to be in the movie. While most of the actors in the movie are B-List stars at best, it is surprising to see Hewitt here. It seems like only yesterday when she was an up and coming star in Hollywood. Now, she is relegated to mediocre roles and films such as this. The real star of the film is Odie. Unlike the CGI Garfield, Odie was cute, heart-warming, and lovable.

It goes without saying that the plot was simplistic and mawkish. It involves Garfield despising the newly adopted Odie then learning a lesson about friendship and sharing. There is also an evil villain, his dopey sidekick, and an army of cute animals. In the end, everyone is happy and the guy gets the girl. There were a few funny moments and zingers, but it was few and far between.

Unlike the Scooby-Doo movies, where there the CGI Scooby only serves as a foil to the other four human and primary characters, the decision to mix a CGI character with real cats and dogs makes for an odd combination. It would have served better to make the movie with 100% real animals ala Cats and Dogs or 100% CGI ala Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Shrek, et al.

Perhaps I am being too hard on Garfield: The Movie. I grew up with one idea and image of Garfield, and the movie presents a completely different view of the character. Of course, my reaction is rejection and spite. However, the movie targets a younger generation, one who did not spend Saturday mornings watching Garfield and Friends, and Sunday mornings reading the Garfield Sunday strip. Indeed, many of the children in the theater laughed at all the jokes and found the movie endearing. So in that sense, Garfield: The Movie succeeds, but if you are a child of the 80s looking for the Garfield of your youth, avoid this movie and instead buy (or rent) the soon to be released Garfield and Friends Vol. 1.

Nevertheless, if you happen to be stuck watching this film (say with a child), entertain yourself by attempting to spot Jim Davis, who – according to IMDB – makes an un-credited cameo as a "Drunken Conventioner".

END RANDY REVIEW

So there you have it, Leaguers!

Thanks to Randy for going through this for the rest of us. I'm going to have to call into question the notion that Jennifer Love Hewitt ever had anything to offer anybody, let alone a sustainable career, but that's just me being snarky.

You can see what Randy is up to on a regular basis at his site: RHPT.com

More on Brad Meltzer's Identity Crisis limited series for DC Comics

Houston Chronicle

New York Daily News

St. Louis Dispatch

I also need to mention Steven Seagle's (not Seagal as I previously misspelled it in a fit of madness...) "It's a Bird..." This is an excellent graphic novel, but it's only out in hardback. I get deep discounts from my retailer as the lone Superman geek of his store on anything Superman related which he's overstocked.

Anyway, Seagle was recently interviewed about the graphic novel on NPR.

Thanks, Science!!!

Remember the scene in Slacker where the guy is locked in his room with dozens of TVs on, and a TV strapped to his back? And the guy explains that he decided to give up on real-life and turn to television because real-life just wasn't real enough?

Maybe we've transcended that and decided instead of all wanting life to be more like TV, we've decided our lives are as ripe as the lives on TV. At least the way we imagine our existences.

And thusly, some company has produced a camera which (I can think of two major practical uses right now...) will no doubt be used instead to perpetuate the navel gazing and endless recycling of our own boring lives as fodder for family slide shows and internet distribution.

Small enough to clip to a pair of eyeglasses, the camera will CONSTANTLY record your experience, keeping only the footage around the time you press record. But don't worry. It will always jump backward, so it's not like you're suddenly beginning a recording when you hit start. It starts 30 seconds before you hit record, if that makes any sense.

Thanks to Emily's boy-toy for the link.

HA HA HA HA HA HA

It's the first real description and images from the new Krypto the Superdog series.



Lifted this from The Superman Homepage

Synopsis:

Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's a ... dog! It's Krypto The Superdog!

Jettisoned to Earth after countless years orbiting in space as a test-pilot puppy aboard a malfunctioning rocket ship built by Superman's father, the fully grown Krypto immediately seeks companionship on the strange new planet, gravitating toward young Kevin Whitney, a boy who longs for friendship.


Endowed with an awesome array of superpowers--from heat vision to superior strength to flying--Krypto partners with Kevin to fight the evil forces that threaten the safety and well-being of both people and animals in Metropolis.

Joining Krypto and Kevin in their never-ending crusade are Bathound, Streaky the Cat, and the Dog Star Patrol, a group of selfless mutts who patrol our solar system for signs of trouble from villains intent on taking over the world. Join the amazing adventures of Krypto The Superdog!

Images!

Krypto in action

Krypto saving kittens

Jim D sent out this amazing link.

Ladybugs at Amazon.com

Read the reviews. I beg of you.

Ray Charles has passed away.

A tribute to that favorite of summer treats, sure to send you into diabetic shock, THE OTTER POP.

More (official) information can be found here. There's something comfortingly lo-fi about the Jel Sert homepage that makes me want to ask them for a job. I imagine Jel Sert is somewhere in Anytown, USA, where I can hang out on my front porch and eat Otter Pops and enjoy 85 degree summers all year long.

And don't miss the Otter Pops' promotional page for the Otter Pops' band.