Sunday, January 13, 2008

American Gladiators

Last week Jamie and I watched an alarming amount of American Gladiators. For this reason alone, I may be willing to kick in some extra dough for the writers so they'll end their strike.

While the current crop of Gladiators is every bit as ridiculous as the Gladiators of yesteryear, and the games are the same, I'm not sure I'm as into the show as I planned to be. It's one thing to wrap up your Saturday evening as a high-schooler watching American Gladiators because it's that or QVC (AG aired late at night in Houston when I was in high school). It's quite something else to realize you're 32 and spent your time from 7-8pm watching American Gladiators with your erstwhile Honey Bunny.

But as the Gladiators themselves are rarely given time to talk (the show is about clubbing weaker opponents, not chit-chat), how do we get to know the Gladiators? The Hater is here to help out.

My favorite Gladiators? All female. Why? Need you ask?

But I have a particular fondness for Hellga.

I've also decided that, if I were doomed to die and I got to choose HOW I was going to die, exactly how would I decide to go out...?
The Gauntlet, staffed by the ladies of the American Gladiators.

If you gotta go, you might as well make it interesting.

And, WB Execs... when casting for Wonder Woman for a movie...

Less of this and more of this.


Anonymous said...

Emily and I have also been watching AG, despite Emily's suspicion the contest is rigged. My favorite Gladiator is Wolf. The women Gladiators scare me, though I do love HELLga.

The League said...

It never occurred to me that they would bother to fix American Gladiators. Now I am curious. What evidence does M see that suggests the fix is in?

Also, when will you don spandex and try out for AG?

Anonymous said...

I actually suggested to Emily that I should try out for AG. She started laughin.

It was the saddest moment of my life.

J.S. said...

There is an attorney named Jorge Sanchez over here at the courthouse who was a competitor on AG back in the old days (he actually won some money after appearing on multiple episodes of the show and winning each time). Anyway, I've had to sit through a number of Jorge's "war stories" about his experiences on AG, and the conspiracy must run pretty deep if the show is faked, because Jorge will gladly tell you about how AG was the most exciting, challenging competition of his life, even all of these years after the fact.

The League said...

Can you do me a favor and ask him what Zap was really like?