The Onion Kinda Nails the Fourth of July Docs for 2026

250 years since Declaration.final.FINAL.lastversion.docx

 yeah, it is the 4th of July.  I guess this is our 250th.

We had a good run.

Pink Hat Guy Merges With The Infinite

Baseball is a sport that takes place over 160 games per season, at three hours-ish per game.  Not all of the games are a thrill-per-minute, and so it gives you some time to notice things other than what's happening on the field.

You can start focusing on some kind of funny things.  Some folks focus on a slow-boiling hate for announcers (I personally cannot stand Ken Rosenthal) or your favorites (I have many, but Elise Menaker killed it in the booth this week).  Even on TV, you will become familiar with what's going on in the stadium - see the Cup Snake that forms in the bleachers at Wrigley. 

But, also, the fans are on-camera - especially behind home plate.  They're usually not aware of the cameras, just going about their business, and generally no one is trying to embarrass anyone. Behind home plate, you're just going to be on camera.  In this way, over the course of a game, you may notice particular people, like an excited kid or people not paying attention as they chat away in the stands.  Less often do you note "regulars".  

But very early on in our Cubs-watching, we noticed "Pink Hat Guy".

His seat was directly behind home plate.  He never wore Cubs blue, but always wore a bright pink cap.  

You knew two things: