Hey, DO NOT FORGET TO SET YOUR VCRs!

Smallville is on tonight, and it's the "Krypto" episode.

Bit and Pieces:

Good dog.

And, hey... Right on.

Also, the Minnesota Vikings were just purchased by a dude from right here in Chandler, AZ. Apparently there's a really rich guy named reggie living right here in my own backyard.

Reed, I hope you like the idea of cheering for the Chandler Vikings.

It's good to see fine art appreciated.

Oy.

I went to the doctor today. I'm not sick, but I switched insurance this year and I decided to start seeing Jamie's doctor since he seems like a non-quack.

Anyhoo, I mostly talked to his PA or NP or whatever, and then Dr. Chang came in, looked me square in the eye and said, "You need to eat less and exercise everyday. But I am not telling you anything you don't already know."

So, it's back to the gym for Ryan as we try to keep the Grim Reaper from coming to collect for a while longer yet.

I have a few wishes regarding death.

1) I don't want to die in some embarassing way. Depending on what you read, Elvis died after a particularly hearty BM. His girlfriend found him face down on the bathroom rug, pants around his ankles. I'd like to avoid this scene for both my sake, and that of Jamie and the funeral workers.

2) I'd like for my death to be a complete surprise. For example, I'll take a piano falling from a tenth story window and squishing me, but I'd prefer just not to know the big one is coming. WHAMMO and over with. Especially if it's a wacky sudden death such as a falling piano. That'd be great.

3) I don't want to outlive everyone I know. That's just way too Omega Man for my tastes. However, if everyone turns into zombies, I'm going to stick around, because then you've still sort of got company and I always wanted to see the final fate of humanity.

4) I'd prefer not to die in front of children. I just wouldn't feel very good about scarring some little kid for life.

5) If I can't have a surprise death, I hope I don't go down without a fight. I'm not talking about fighting some disease, because that's obvious. I mean I hope I'm old, senile and not afraid to take out an orderly or two before I go down.

6) I hope I can take Jason with me.

7) I'd like a Viking Funeral on Town Lake. Load me up with all my earthly possessions, float me past the bridge and then light me up. Also, I'd like for someone to play Ozzy Osbourne's "Crazy Train" as I go up.

I don't think any of this is too much to ask for. You have to think about these things in advance or you're never going to be prepared when your number is up.

A Eulogy for Ninja-Boy

Friend, Conversation Piece, Goldfish

Ninja-Boy, goldfish of the Amazing Steanso, was found floating, pectorals up, this morning. I have decided to eulogize Ninja-Boy in the way most befitting. By quoting Spock's Eulogy by Kirk from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

We are assembled here today to pay final respects to our honored dead.

And yet, it should be noted, that in the midst of our sorrow, this death takes place in the shadow of new life, the sunrise of a new world, a world that our beloved comrade gave his life to protect and nourish. He did not feel this sacrifice a vain or an empty one, and we will not debate his profound wisdom at these proceedings. Of my friend, I can only say this...

Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most -

human.


GODSPEED, NINJA BOY.

Mrs. League here.

In honor of Valentine's Day, I urge you to not allow your loved ones to eat this. The Hamdog.

Leaguers, this is the most disgusting item of 'food' I have ever seen. A brief description:

"a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries"

Bleargh.


I would also like to wish the League a Happy Valentine's Day. He is truly the bestest husband in the world! Thanks for a wonderful Valentine's Day weekend!

Happy Valentine's Day, Leaguers!

Jamie and I sort of already had Valentine's Day over the weekend. Sorry, Jamie. No big surprises today.

We went and saw the travelling show of The Lion King, which was much better than you would think it would be. After the fiasco we had going to the theater last time, I was feeling a bit nervous about going to the show once again, but it all panned out just fine. Leaguers, it's the circle of life, and it moves us all.

Jamie and I will probably stay in and eat sandwiches for Valentine's Day dinner. I'm not sure if that's romantic, but that's what I've got planned.

If you want to read up on what Valentine's Day is (aside from one of very few holidays that involves both the name of a Saint and occassionally the exchanging of saucy underwear), you can check out the History Channel's web-site here.


A scene from the early stages of Mr. and Mrs. League's relationship.