Hey Uncle Bob!

So. It appears that my uncle, "Pentagon" Bob, has been lurking here at The League for quite some time. And by quite some time, I mean, at least a year.

"Pentagon" Bob earned his name by working for the military for years, and this meant his office was right there in the Pentagon. Which, of course, meant that all of my friends were convinced Bob was some sort of secret agent. I am still not convinced Bob is not a secret agent. He lurked here at The league for over a year, and I had no idea he was here. Pretty sneaky, eh?

Bob is married to Linda, who is one groovy chick all on her own. She may also be a spy, but we'll never know, will we?

Bob once took me on a tour of the Pentagon, and I tell you this: I have never seen so many urinals in one, single men's room. That, and these urinals were spotless. That's a fine example of either military discipline or precision, and I have not yet decided which it truly represents.

The other thing you need to know about the Pentagon is this: It's huge. Any enemy forces planning to infiltrate the Pentagon are completely wasting their time. They're going to get lost and end up having to ask for directions.

Thanks to a wicked combination of a derth of vacation days and conflicting family vacation events, I very rarely get to see Bob and Linda these days. It's tough to get all of us in one place at the same time. That, and Bob's constant spy work keeps him busy.

Anyway, it appears that, thanks to Pentagon Bob, my folks located not just my blog, but they also recently located that of Brother Dearest. I assume Jason will now be far more paranoid about what gets posted over at AoS.

I am curious what illusions Bob might have once had about his two cherubic nephews that we've managed to shatter, tread upon and then toss in the dust-bin. Ah, well. Hopefully they'll keep sending nice Christmas cards.

But you gotta love Bob. I shall never forget that when everyone else failed me one bleak Christmas, it was Bob who provided us with Nerf Boomerangs. Those things rocked.

In case you missed Doug's comment:

Not all of the escaped Gorillas were violent:



Yes, the League enjoys a good photo-op as much as the next guy. Perhaps even more so.

I can't help but look at this photo and think: I'm an idiot.

People always say to me: League, why don't you like going to the beach?

As a child, I loved going to the beach. And then one day when I was about 9, I realized that I no longer liked the beach.

I sunburn. I am one pale, highly flammable bastard, and the slightest bit of sunlight turns me lobster red. Not only do I burn, but I always felt sick from dehydration. Whatever fun I had for a few hours grew to be ruined by a) the constant worry of burning b) getting out of the water every fifteen minutes to apply more suntan lotion c) the horrible, greasy feel of suntan lotion caked on, mixed with salt water and sand d) in 1997 I finally REALLY misjudged, and after an hour and a half in the sun, I was burned so badly that I got the blisters. That SUCKED.

and the real kicker: Everybody has to take a bug-eyed at you and exclaim, "Boy, are you sunburned! Didn't you use sunscreen?"

Yes, yes I did use sunscreen on my trip to San Diego. But I did not use it yesterday as I didn't realize I would be outside for any duration.

I own a mirror. I know I am sunburned. I do not need to be told by each person who walks by my office that I am sunburned. I do, in fact, know that sunscreen exists and I am used to applying it in liberal quantities. Sometimes it is difficult to judge if you need it, and yesterday I misjudged.

I am now going to print a sign and tape it to my monitor to inform my co-workers that I know I am sunburned and that I do not need any help or instructions for future exposure to sunlight.

Stay classy, San Diego!

Well, we're back. Let me say that San Diego is a lovely town with friendly people and a lot to offer. We had ourselves quite a time, and I would very much liek to go back.

We stayed at a loverly hotel just off Balboa Park, The Balboa Park Inn.

It was made up of several former small apartment buildings, and each room was given a unique theme. We stayed in The Orient Express.



Jamie poses in our fabulous suite

The evening we arrived we went on a harbor tour and got a good look at some naval vessels, some cargo vessels, Coronado Island, etc... Very nice. The tour guide was deemed controversial, but all in all, it was an interesting tour.

The next morning we got up early, got breakfast, and headed for the San Diego Zoo (only a few blocks from the hotel).




Gorillas rampaged all about the park. We feared for our very lives.

Joining us on our trip were Jamie's brother, Doug... His lady-friend, Kristen, and Jamie's pal, Heather "H" Wagner.




Doug, Kristen, H, Jamie

The best transit at the San Diego Zoo? Skycar!

Heather spots a loose gorilla in a passing Skycar

San Diego is also home to a few Giant Pandas. These guys are terribly endangered.


This Panda is trying to sleep one off after yet another night out with the hippos.

Jamie was delighted to see the Pandas. It was a highlight of our visit to the San Diego Zoo. Especially with all the loose gorillas causing so much trouble.



Jamie is delighted to have seen a Panda. Up until this point, she's usually only eaten them.

Toward the end of the day, we paused at the Elephant Exhibit.


Nothing finishes off a day like an elephant.

We didn't have a shot at finishing seeing the whole zoo. The place is enormous and very hilly. I could have easily done another whole day at the zoo, and hope to return soon to see the rest of the exhibits.

I didn't take too many pictures after this, but we went for a lovely dinner last night at Prado restaurant. It was a lot of fun, and it was significantly better than the dinner at the tourist trap we'd gone to the night before.

Today we got up and ran over to Coronado Island. Very nice place with a lot of history.

At any rate, hope you all had a good weekend. We sure did.

Sounds like it's time to switch to the caesar salad...

A Birthday for Jamie

Hey, everybuddy! Friday is Jamie's big birthday. In order to celebrate, we're shaking the dirt of this one horse town off our sorry hides and we're heading for sunny San Diego, California.

Jamie turns the big three-oh on this particular birthday, and it's a landmark occasion by anybody's measure. Hopefully she will refrain from making me put away my childish things.

She's a special person, she is. And I am very lucky to have her. She is beautiful and funny and smart, and she's as kind and patient as anyone. She gives without asking, and makes my life better.

She puts up with a lot from me and from the world, and she does it all with infinite grace. I never stop learning from her.

She is the world to me, and I hope that I can make a fraction as happy on her birthday as she makes me each day.

Happy birthday, Jamie. I love you.



Needless to say, you'll note that The League is going on hiatus until our return next week.

The League Presents: Samantha Maja Cone

Leaguers, last week we brought you the first published account of the shocking new entrant to the human race, Samantha Maja Cone. Just mere hours after her arrival on Planet Earth, Samantha's pa, Nathan, rung me up to tell me all was well with baby and mother.

Now Renata and Samantha are home, and the first pics of Samantha are in.



Samantha contemplates the mysteries of the cosmos. Note, she already has her wrist band for ZZ Top tickets. Rock n' Rollllllllllll!!!!!



Samantha is prepped for travel and/ or sleeping. Jamie wears a similar harness so she doesn't fall out of bed.



Samantha is tuckered out after her big travel day. Ah, to go back to the simple days of her youth, floating suspended in a pod of amniotic fluid...



Nathan and Renata try to guess how much the baby will fetch on the black market.

So congratulations, Cones! You done had a baby! You guys are going to be groovy parents.

Just remember, it's never too late to change her legal name to "Dr. Octopus."