Melapalooza on SATURDAY

Hey all,

Everyone who reads this is welcome to attend Melapalooza '08. Please be aware that we open doors at 2:00. I think there's some confusion over what time the party starts, so I just want to make sure I make a final note about that one. As much as we love all of you, I'm kicking you folks out before midnight.

The League needs his beauty rest.

Anyway, hope to see everyone. If you need directions, etc... do not hesitate to e-mail.

Best,

Ryan

You can help Melbotis!

Go to this link:

Statesman Golden Retriever vote

Mel's at #192. You can help! Go to #192 and vote "yes". Help out Mel! And then vote "no" on a whole bunch of other Golden Retrievers.

Melapalooza: April 19th, 2008

Mel's 10th birthday is April 22nd, 2008. However, we're celebrating on April 19th, 2008. And you (yes, you, Steven) are invited (also, others).


It's my birthday, ya'll

Doug and Kristen will be in town for the festivities, and Doug has promised that he will demonstrate his famous "Fire and Sword Swallowing Act". Blindfolded. While Kristen throws knives at him.

I am on strike as far as the BBQing goes. It always winds up that I spend the whole time over the grill, worried that I am charring someone's burger or hotdog. This year we'll figure something else out. Or I'll cook on our new grill pan.

There will be Wii, soda and a cake for Mel. This year, its all about Mr. Puppy Pants turning the big One-Oh.

More announcements soon.

Friends of Melbotis

A huge thank you to all of you who have inquired about Mel's welfare over the past week or so.

Mel's having some trouble with his stitching, so I'm bringing him back to the vet tomorrow, very early. I asked Jamie if I could not see if they could not do a quick patch job at Build-a-Bear at the mall, but she said the vet would probably do a better job.

I want to send special public thanks to a few folks:

• The parents, who have been so supportive
• Jason, who took Lucy off our hands during the days of surgery
• Nicole, who has helped out a lot with Mel over the past week
• Steven and Lauren, who came over this weekend for a quiet night in, to visit with Mel and to wrangle Lucy
• Randy, who generously sent along some delicious looking gourmet dog treats

Mel appreciates it, and we appreciate it.

I do not mean to leave anyone off of the list here. Thanks so much to everyone.

Mel is getting better. Surgery is just tough, especially when you're a dog and have no idea what is going on.

A Post about Mel

You can see a picture of a post-surgery Melbotis at Jason's blog.

Mel looks like 10 Miles of Bad Road

Ho boy.

Well, the left half of Mel's face is shaved, as well as the left side of his neck, and some spots around his legs. His face is pretty badly bruised from the surgery, and his eye is sort of blackened, if a dog can get a black eye.

Jamie's got him pretty well tranq'd up, so he's resting, and seems perhaps... too happy when he does wake up. He has to eat tiny little scoops of his dog food which Jamie has turned into meatballs.

I know in a few days he'll be getting back to normal in spirits, but for now he looks a bit like Batman-villain Two Face.

Also, the cone... I have to put the cone on him again. Which I'm not looking forward to. But he should really wear it tonight.

It looks like the surgery went well. Jamie's doing a great job if taking care of Mel.

he just twitched in his sleep and kicked me in the butt.

Anyhow, he's doing okay. He just looks like a dog that just had serious surgery.

Mel Report

Hey Leaguers. I know less about today than Jamie, but it sounds like Mel's surgery went well.

Jamie dropped him off at 7:00, and heard back from the vet about 2:45. It sounds like the surgery went as planned. As of 2:45, Mel was awake and resting.

Jamie called again at 5:30, and he'd already been up, gone wee, and was hopped up on goofballs.

She's going to pick him up tomorrow afternoon (we're not really sure when). She has to get some serious pick up instructions.

Jason has Lucy tonight, and maybe tomorrow night, so Mel can rest when he gets home. Jeff the Cat will simply get punted if he interferes.

I want to thank everyone for the well wishes and prayers (thanks, Ma!). Mel seems to be on the road to recovery.


UPDATE

It seems we were misinformed. We can't pick up Mel today. Which means Lucy has been destroying Jason's house today for no good reason.

I'll leave it to Jamie and the commenst section to fill in more details.

Everyone Wish Mel Well

Mel is going off to have his surgery tomorrow morning. Jamie, being the good person she is, is getting in the car and driving him up to Round Rock at 6:45 in the morning.

I am convinced Mel will come through with flying colors. He has had a few surgeries before before, and he has always done well. There's also an 85% chance this will get rid of the problem altogether. So, you know, I think he's going to be fine.

The poor guy is going to have to wear one of this big, plastic cones for a while. I think he wore one for a short time quite a few years back, but I am anticipating he's going to be really, really unhappy for the duration. On the plus side, he will get to eat soft food for a few weeks, which he's not been able to do before. Hopefully he'll think he's getting a treat every meal for a while.

The worst thing for both Mel and Lucy will be that, because Mel's surgery is in his mouth, we're going to have to hide all the toys for a while. Mel and Lucy both love their toys, and associate them with playing and being good dogs. In fact, whenever you come back from even a run to Taco Cabana, Mel runs around with a toy in his mouth and cries. At night he walks around with a nylon bone in his mouth like a cigar, or one of his vaguely people-shaped toys that he moves from place to place around the downstairs.

Anyway, no toys for the dogs for a few weeks. And while some small aprt of me is looking forward to not having the clutter, I know that the dogs are going to be deeply unhappy without anything to play with.

So everyone wish Mel well. We'll give a report again tomorrow night.

The Ability to Talk to Animals

Mel V. Cancer

The day after Christmas, Jamie noticed Mel had a pretty substantial growth in his mouth. As Mel's gotten older, he's grown these weird little lumps under his skin. We got the first few removed over two surgeries (three?). Essentially the growth in his mouth was a similar lump, only in his gums.

They had scraped a similar lump in April and had it sent off for testing. It came back benign, and we didn't really think too much about it any more.

On Friday, the results from Mel's December surgery came back. Our vet called me on my cell about 3:00. After a lot of explanation of words that really didn't mean a whole lot to me, the bottom line was that they'd found cancer cells in the growth. Mel, my pal, has cancer.

As hard as it was to hear, I also knew it was now my responsibility to share the information with Jamie. And so I asked about our options. Mel is not yet 10, and he's still as frisky as he's really ever been, so letting him just be an old dog and try to just keep comfortable until it gets bad isn't an option.

Apparently there's now dog radiation and dog chemo. For people, who understand what's going on, that's the path you go. For dogs who only know you're taking them to get sick over and over every time they get in the car. There's also a dog oncologist in Round Rock (of course), and so we had options, anyway.

I did my bit of steeling myself on the way home. We were headed out to dinner with Steven and Lauren, and while I wanted Jamie to know, I also didn't want to tell her over the phone. So while Jamie was getting dressed and made-up to go out, I had to drop the bomb.

Jamie is, despite outward appearances, the toughest person I know. She's never given up on anyone or anything, and certainly knows that before you shed too many tears about bad medical news, you grit your teeth and start figuring out your options.

What made it easier to share, of course, was seeing Mel when I walked in the door. As usual, he was sitting on the couch, ears pitched forward, tail spinning wildly and happy as a clam.

"You aren't sick."
"Nope."
"Look at you."
"Yup."
"We've got a long way to go before we write you off, pal."
"Thanks!"

And so on the way to dinner we discussed our options, and talked about the fact that Mel was okay right now. So what we have to do, we decided, is just make sure he's a happy boy.

Saturday we took Mel and Lucy to the dog park, where Mel ran around just as happy as ever, playing king of the dog park while keeping that nice safety zone close by, with Lucy playing the little tag-along sister.

He is not sick. He is fine. He can play and chase the ball and goof with other dogs, and when he comes back to check in with you, his eyes are still that same bright brown, his tongue still pink, his ears still perked and eager.

On Monday Jamie went to see the vet and got the name of the Oncologist and Surgeon team. Yesterday Mel went to the oncologist for a CAT scan and to get checked out.

They think they can get it with surgery. He's going in next week for a consultation. He has no idea what's going on, but he's still Mel.

"Do you have any idea what's going on?"
"None."
"They say you're sick. You've got the cancer, pal."
"The heck you say."
"Yeah. On your gum."
"Oh. Yeah. That figures."
"It's not supposed to metastasize. They think they can get it with some surgery."
"Oh."
"So it's gonna get cleared up. But it's going to take some tough days ahead."
"Okay. Jamie will take care of me?"
"You know she will."
"Okay, then."
"We're gonna have you around for a long while yet."
"And then where will I go?"
"A place full of couches and tennis balls, other dogs to play with and an endless sea of Milk Bones."
"Will you be there?"
"I'll catch up sooner or later."

requires sound



also, not our dogs. Just something from YouTube

Weekends are better at Jason's

While we were off in Wisconsin for a wedding, Melbotis and Lucy stayed with Jason.

The other dog is Cassidy. Rrruuuooooouuurrrrr!!!!!!!

Child-Free American

So the other night we were at dinner with Steven and Lauren and were seated across from Steven's friends Forrest, Marina and their kid, Blaze. Blaze, you must understand, looks like he should be in grape juice commercials, is talkative without being annoyingly precocious and had not an ounce of bratty in him. In short, a good kid.

Unsure of what else to chat about, Blaze seemed like a good option. And in the course of the discussion someone accurately described Jamie and I as "childless". But that person was quickly shot down in favor of what must be a new term: Child-Free.

Apparently this term was cooked up to spare the feelings of those who would like to have children, but do not. I am both amused and horrified that, for the first time in my life, as a middle class white male I've had a PC label applied to me. My feelings must be mitigated through semantics. I am to be described in a way that suggests I have made a valid choice of alternative lifestyle, and that choice is recognized and appreciated by all.

Were Jamie and I the same age we were when we left for Arizona, the question of the number of children we had left behind with Gorton's fish sticks and Kraft Mac'n'Cheese would never be addressed. Young, recently married, we'd be expected to be having a great time, going to shows, travel the world, etc...

But now...

Now we are in our 30's. In March and April, it will be semi-accurate to describe us as being in our mid-30's. We are past the age when we've gotten our careers going, have had our youthful fun, and its time to bring the next generation of Leagues into existence. For the rest of my life, it will be presumed I'm hiding a couple of fishstick-eaters somewhere.

For anyone who has followed this blog, its not a secret that this is not going to happen. I like kids. Despite all the jokes I make at the expense of folks who are now wrestling with sleepless nights, dirty diapers and paying for college in 17 years... And as much as I like sleeping in, not having dirty diapers and spare money enough to buy Jimmy Olsen comics... Having kids just isn't in the picture. We didn't make the choice, but it's also never been in the cards, and so was never been given much consideration any more than "wouldn't it be neat if we had hands where our ears are".

I want to be very clear here: In no way am I offended by assumptions that we should have kids. I don't think folks who have kids are suckers. I was just left reeling at the idea that I had moved into a category which I had not been aware existed.

Now, here's what I dig about my valid lifestyle choice as a Child-Free American... It may keep me from going through the battery of questions all child-rearing folks (AKA: Breeders) have:
-when we plan to have kids
-why we don't plan to have kids
-why we don't press on and adopt, because, you know, we'd make swell parents (a topic which is sorely up for debate, and would require experiments that no western government would allow. Jason's hypothesis: Feral Children.).

As Child-Free Americans its like we decided on a different path in life. Like, say, we decided to live in a dymaxion home or done something else slightly unconventional, but, you know, it's just something you let slide.

As a Dog-Saddled/ Child-Free American, unfortunately, you have a great love for your pets. And people really, really do not like you matching their stories about how their kid smiles when he farts with how your dog wakes you up in the morning when she's hungry, or how your cat has figured out how to open the pantry door. Still, I must remind everyone that your kid will be in diapers for years and my dog learned to go to the door before she was six months old when she had to pee. I'm just saying.

Pretty sharp, my dogs.

Jill solves dog energy crisis

Arden puts cute doggy in inescapable death grip


Of course! If the dog is hyper, obtain a child. Apply child to dog...

It's really the only way I can think of to get Lucy to quit trying to sit on me when I'm playing Wii or on my laptop. I'm totally going to the Mall and looking for a lay-a-way plan for a kid this weekend.

Thanks to Randy for sending this along. No, Arden has not finally escaped from Jill. Spike Jonze is making a movie of "Where the Wild Things Are".


Not much going on here. Last night Jamie and I had a lovely dinner with Lauren at Chuy's. Steven was traveling, so she came on back to League HQ and hung out for a while. She's a swell dame, and while we never did get around to firing up the Wii as planned, we still managed to stay entertained.

Found at Lauren's blog... Watch as a morning show host/ journalist actually tries not to cover the Hilton story. Not just a wink and a sigh... I mean, really tries not to cover the story...



I'm still trying to get my head around what happened there. But I know I just saw something that tells us a whole lot about cable news... and I'm sort of afraid. Not in a "I'm being snooty" way. I'm genuinely a little freaked out by how her co-hosts and the producers reacted.

This evening Jamie met up with Amy C. and went to go see Henson's "Labyrinth" at the Dobie and I tried to clean up my office for the first time since before I got a job. It was a @#$%ing mess.

I spoke briefly with JimD (aka jmd) who had been to the first meeting of the S. Carolina Longhorns. Anyhow, apparently Jim saw there was no Texas Ex org and put one together. So, essentially, Jim just found his drinking buddies for Saturdays from August to December. Well done JimD!

I then walked the dogs, reached the farthest point in the neighborhood from the house, and it began to totally pour. Like, not a drizzle and then some rain. It was like someone turned on a shower. Mel flipped out and pulled out of his collar and leash and Lucy was straining horribly at the end of her leash.

Jamie came and tried to save us. She'd just made it home. Sadly, it was too late. I was drenched like I'd jumped in a pool with my clothes on. Hopefully my "Say No to Kryptonite!" shirt will survive.

Dog Tired

1) I have not made a peep regarding the massacre at Virginia Tech. I've kept mum partially because any words I've tried to summon on the topic have felt woefully inadequate.

This evening the South Mall at UT (which lies in the shadow of the UT Tower) was filled with thousands of students, alumni and folks from the Austin community for a candle ceremony to commemorate the victims. If any school understands the long memory of such a tragedy, it's the UT community.

Best hopes go out to the families of the victims and the Virginia Tech community.

2) Our dogs are attempting to bankrupt us. Last week Lucy managed to wind up at the vet almost every day, and will need to be continually monitored for a while at home. She's been having odd GI problems which are not providing us with any obvious diagnoses or solution. Things culminated in a 30 hour stay at the animal hospital over Saturday and Sunday. She seems fine now, but...

And tomorrow Melbotis will be visiting the vet to have a lumpectomy. The lump is not believed to be malignant, but the vet wants to remove it before it does become a problem. Poor Mel.

Poor Lucy.

Jeff the Cat is fine.

3) I am hopelessly behind on Comic Fodder work.

4) I am hopelessly behind on providing questions to Steven G. Harms for The Mellies.

5) I am hopelessly behind on keeping up with Steven and Lauren since their move northward. I warned them that once you pass the river, you are dead to me...

6) I need to call Cousin Susan and explain what happened with the weekend.

7) I minorly screwed up at work today. My first @#$% up! Hurray!

8) I now own "Star Spangled War Stories #139" featuring the origin of Enemy Ace. If you are me, you think that is totally rad.

9) On a related note, Jamie won herself a suitor on Sunday at Austin Books. I had wandered off to price back-issues of "New Gods", and Jamie was sort of standing there with a copy of the latest American Splendor collection in her hand when a young gentleman took the opportunity to break the ice by declaring his admiration for Harvey Pekar. He just kept talking. And talking. Clearly not picking up on Jamie's "please go away..." vibes.

Because The League is a curious sort of fellow, we decided to let the events unfold naturally, with no intervention despite Jamie's telepathic cries for rescue. (a) I wanted to see how Jamie would handle it, (b) there's a chance jamie's just looking for the right opportunity to jump ship, and (c) did I really want to be the guy who puffs his chest and goes all monkey crazy because some dude is talking to his lady?

I think Jamie let the chap down rather easily, properly showing zero interest and letting him verbally paint himself into a corner from which the only escape was to feign interest in some nearby comics and wander off. This was after he talked a bit too much about how his ex-girlfriend just didn't get Harvey, even though she tried for his benefit.

At this point I re-entered the scene, excited to know that this gentleman would then tell his friends "And then she left with some dork who was looking for back issues of 'New Gods'! Who reads 'New Gods'? NERD!"

Being a girl in a comic shop is a frightening, frightening proposition. Still, I hope Jamie was at least a little flattered.

In reviewing the scene, I suspect that were The League flying a solo mission, we'd fair no better in trying to break the ice.

10) It. Just. Keeps. Raining.

Well, better than 110 days of continuous sunshine, I guess.

11) As soon as my membership to Hollywood video begins, I end it. I still am physically incapable of watching rented movies or returning them.

12) Today I bought these mints. How many mints come with a warning not to eat them if you have high blood pressure? Not too many. But my Mogo Mints sure as @#$% did. Scroll to the bottom left here to see the many, many health warnings associated with enjoying a Mogo Mint.

I'm working near campus which is why I think I'm discovering caffeine supplements again (I had Jolt Mints last week). I've been told a Quix near campus sells caffeine that, my co-worker informs me "you can mainline". I guess you can buy small tubes of powdered caffeine now.

If those items had been available in 1993-1998, I shudder to think of what a short, jittery life I might have led.

11) I shall not be viewing "Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School". Take the craziest girls from the first two seasons of Flavor of Love, remove Flav, give the girls semi-sociopathic advice that makes no sense... it's like watching someone disturb bee's nests for an hour.

What concerned me most was that the girl kicked off on the first episode clearly had rage issues, if not downright issues with her mental health, and she reached out to show host comedienne Mo'Nique. She was subsequently kicked off the show for showing weakness.

Apparently I missed the part of where becoming a better person means being a cut-throat jerk and refusing to see a shrink when you clearly need one.

I wanted to like the show. I really did. I was honestly shocked at the criteria the judges used in the elimination round.

12) Even more surprising for sheer evil is the new VH1 documentary show about the making of "The Jerry Springer Show" entitled "The Springer Hustle". Free of anything resembling scruples, the producers on Springer don't hide a thing as they work to get their guests into a fighting mood prior to releasing them onto the stage. Totally amazing to see folks who've so clearly lost sight of (or never had) basic human empathy as they try to outdo their fellow producers on a show that, ultimately, has absolutely no redeeming value.

13) I've also beenw atching Dogfights on History Channel. For some reason I find the show completely fascinating.